Eventually, I fell asleep, but every few hours, they’d wake me up to check my blood pressure. In the morning, the doctor came to visit and asked how I was feeling.
“Sore, and my head still hurts. Is that normal?”
As he looked through my chart, he said, “It will probably hurt for another day or so. Abstain from any activity where you risk falling. You don’t want to hit your head again. Other than that, you’re cleared to go, but get your shoulder checked out when you return home. I suspect it’s only bruised, but it’s best to be safe.”
“Thank you.”
The hospital ordered a cab to carry me back to the hotel only I didn’t have a purse or anything to pay. I went to the room but had to knock since I didn’t have a key. Grey opened the door and looked awful.
“I need my purse to pay for the taxi that brought me home.”
“Marin, I … it’s been a mess here with Kinsley.”
“It’s fine. I’ll be right back.”
He reached into his pocket, pulled out his wallet, and handed me a bunch of euros. “Here. That ought to be enough.”
I went back down and gave the guy a huge tip for having to wait.
Back upstairs, Grey explained that Kinsley had to go to the hospital too, but they took her to a different one. “And then I had Aaron to contend with.”
“How is she?”
He ran his hand through his hair. “I’m not sure. Why did you take them there? She said you left her.” His tone was sharp, piercing.
He stunned me with his accusation. “Left her? I didn’t leave her … would never leave her. I was with them the entire time. And I went because I didn’t think ... it was my fault, yes, for not investigating the place. But I never expected anything like that to happen.” Tears formed in my eyes, and soon they turned into trickles sliding down my cheeks.
Stormy gray eyes stabbed mine, chilling me to the bone. Why would he possibly think I would do anything to harm the kids? That thought hurt more than anything and only solidified my decision to leave.
“I, uh, I would like to check on her if I could.”
A brief slash of his head was all I got.
“Grey. I should never have gone there in the first place. It was horrible.” I shuddered and turned so he couldn’t see the pain in my eyes. Then I went to Kinsley.
“Short stuff, are you awake?” I whispered in case she was asleep.
“Yeah.”
“What’s going on? Are you hurt?”
“My leg hurts.”
I bent down to check it out. “Can I kiss it to make it better?”
“Yeah.” So, I did.
“How’s that?”
“Okay.”
“Only okay?”
“I didn’t like that place, Marnie.”
I brushed her hair off her face. “Guess what? Neither did I. We won’t ever go back there, okay?”
Her head dipped up and down.
“Wanna come and watch some movies?”
“Okay. Marnie? You said you’d never leave and you left.” She started crying and wrapped her tiny arms around my neck. I cried right along with her.
“I didn’t leave you, sweetie. I had to go to the hospital for the night.”
Through her sobs that hacked my heart into more pieces than it already was, she begged, “Promise you won’t leave no more.”
I said the only thing I could think of. “Give me a hug you big goofball.” I couldn’t give her that promise because in another day I would be breaking her heart again and I couldn’t bear to think about it.
Chapter Thirty-Six
Greydon
* * *
My commitment to do the talk was fulfilled in the morning while Marin and the kids were off somewhere. After lunch, I was sitting in on one of the other talks, and we all heard the explosion. It was close to the hotel so one of the physicians went out to inquire what happened. He came back with not much of an answer. I called Marin and never got a response. She wasn’t answering any of my texts either, so I immediately knew something was wrong. A little later, I left the conference and checked with the hotel. They had just received word about the gas explosion. The authorities were shutting down all gas lines until they could determine where it stemmed from. I tried Marin repeatedly with no luck. It was really worrying me because it wasn’t like her to not let me know her whereabouts. Then information started coming in about the explosion and how it affected the catacombs beneath the church. Things began clicking together as I remembered what Mom had told her about that tour of the catacombs. My chest instantly felt like it was being crushed and I couldn’t push away the ache in the back of my throat. I rushed over there, but they wouldn’t let me near at first … until I explained how I thought my kids were down there.
They allowed me through the cordoned-off section where the rescue teams had been established. There were about thirty people trapped. At first, they didn’t know how serious it was. As time passed, they eventually began to feel confident they could get everyone out, but they weren’t sharing much with me. The language was a barrier with some of the workers, although they tried their best to communicate what they could. A translator arrived and kept us up to speed, but the weight on my chest kept getting heavier, making breathing a struggle.
If anything happened to them … what would I do? And Marin, the way I’d been treating her. Acid seared my gut with the thought of it. How could I have done this to her? How could I have pushed her away like this? I was such a monumental idiot. She’d done nothing but bring brightness into my soul. She was completely selfless, only thinking about doing what was best for the kids. I swallowed and the bite of pain over every moronic thing I had done, sent nails shooting straight into my heart.
Approximately seven hours after the explosion hit, they broke through to the first group. There were about fifteen people, but Marin and the kids weren’t among them. I tried to ask about them but wasn’t able to. The lead on the search and rescue said he would find out who the tour guide was and they would establish when they had everyone out.
One of my colleagues came later and waited with me. I’m not even sure how he found out I was there, but it was a relief because he spoke both languages and was a huge help. He discovered that the tunnels had been blocked in several areas and they were breaking through one by one. They were confident everyone would be out soon.
When they got to the last blocked section, they found Marin and the kids. At my first glimpse of them, the band around my chest eased and my lungs instantly expanded. I could breathe again and for a moment I was actually light-headed. Tears welled up in my eyes and I was giddy. Yes, giddy. I trembled and when they ushered them close to me, I pulled them all against me. The man in the hard hat handed Aaron over and all three of us stood there in an embrace. That is until Marin collapsed.
“Hey, somebody help,” I yelled.
“Daddy! What’s wrong with Marnie?” Kinsley was sobbing hysterically and I could barely understand her. Everything broke down at once. My joy at having them all here was short-lived.
A medic ran over and soon a gurney appeared. Marin woke up, but Kinsley was inconsolable, screaming about the monsters in the dark place. She totally freaked out. I had Aaron to deal with, who also was crying. Then I noticed blood on Kinsley and a medic was speaking to me, only I couldn’t hear him because Kinsley was crying so loud.
My colleague touched my arm and said, “Grey, she should be checked out.” Then he spoke to the medic. But Kinsley wouldn’t let me go. So, I had to ride in the ambulance with her and Aaron. It was a total shit show.
I wanted to check on Marin, but there was no time. My daughter needed me. When we got to the hospital, I figured I’d check on Marin then, but they took her to a different one.
As it turned out, Kinsley only had some minor bruising and a few lacerations. But they were concerned about PTSD, as was I. They ended up giving her a mild sedative because she wouldn’t stop screaming. I had never seen her like this and it was frig
htening.
My colleague was waiting for us in the waiting room and drove us back to the hotel.
“I don’t quite know how to thank you,” I said.
“No thanks necessary. I’m just sorry your trip to my home has been so troubled. Can I help you up to your room?”
“No, that’s fine. But can you find out where they took Marin?” I gave him her full name.
“Yes, and I’ll text you the information.”
“Thank you.”
When I got to the suite, I put Aaron to bed. Kinsley wouldn’t stop crying again. Her sedative had worn off, so I had to give her another one. She was inconsolable and it freaked me out. I was exhausted and at my wits end. She finally calmed down about the time the sun was rising, so I climbed into bed, not thinking I’d sleep. I was wrong.
The knock on the door woke me up. Marin stood on the other side. She looked terrible—like she had been through the worst experience of her life. And she had. But I’d never seen her look more beautiful in my life. I wanted to pull her into my arms and hold her forever. Only she had to run down and pay the taxi driver.
When she got back to the room, I went off on her. All I could think of was how Kinsley said the place scared her and that Marin left her. Without thinking, I accused her, even though those were the words of an overreacting child and a father who’d had more than he could handle. It wasn’t the least bit fair to her and I was a total ass.
She tried to explain, but it was no use. She went to see Kinsley and the timing wasn’t right at all for us. We needed to talk. There were so many things I wanted to tell her … things I had fucked up that needed to be fixed. But Kinsley needed us both, so I figured it would wait until the time was right.
Once again, I screwed that up. This seemed to be the story of my life. I needed someone in my head constantly saying—Don’t do it, man.
The following morning, I quietly got out of bed so as not to wake Kinsley, and took Aaron into the other room to change him. When I got there, Marin’s door was open. I entered it only to find it empty. All her things were gone. On the bed was a letter.
* * *
Grey,
Under the circumstances, I thought it best if I leave. Simply put, it’s just not possible for me to share this suite with you. When we decided to take this trip, I thought I could handle it. I see now it was a mistake for me to come. I’m so sorry. And I’m sorry about what happened in the catacombs. It truly wasn’t a place for kids. I should’ve investigated it more. I pray that Kinsley is all right. I love her and Aaron very, very much. Please tell her I’ll see her when you return home.
Marin
* * *
What the hell was I going to tell my polka dot? She was in the worst shape ever—even worse than after Susannah died. It was ridiculous for us to stay too. I quickly called the airlines to see what times the flights were. It was only six thirty. There was a nine thirty flight. We could make that.
I rushed around like a maniac. I took a shower with Aaron. Kinsley didn’t need one. She could go home without one. I woke her up, then stuffed all our things into the suitcases.
“Get dressed, honey. We can’t spare even a minute. We’re leaving and a taxi is picking us up in twenty minutes. You need to brush your teeth and wash your face. Hurry, hurry.”
She was groggy but did as I asked. The bellman arrived just as I was zipping up the last bag. We had so much shit, but that was fine. The thought of going home made me smile.
“Where’s Marnie?”
“Um … she caught the earlier flight because there wasn’t room for us all.” I hated lying, but I didn’t have it in me to tell her the truth.
She didn’t respond and the last thing I needed was for her to know Marin left us. I was going to pull every trick out of my bag to get her back.
The bellman loaded our stuff into the waiting taxi while I settled our bill and off we went. We went through the airport and Aaron was in the carrier on my chest, Kinsley was hanging on one hand while I pushed a carry-on with the other. It wasn’t exactly a picnic traveling with two kids alone.
I didn’t get a seat for Aaron since he was under two. For takeoff, he was in my lap and then during the flight I put him in the seat with Kinsley. They watched movies together until he got too fidgety, and then I took him. He slept some and I’d put the seat into the flat bed position. He was always so good. Thank God he wasn’t a whiny flier.
We landed and went through customs, with Kinsley asking a bunch of questions.
“What is that machine for? Why do they ask you that? What are they doing there?” Trying to explain immigration to a seven-year-old was nearly impossible.
“Why can’t we all just have one big place where we all live, Daddy?”
“Good question, polka dot.”
The car service I’d ordered while waiting for our baggage had arrived and drove us home. I was never so happy to get there in my life. All I had to do now was reconstruct the shambles of Marin’s heart. But hey, wasn’t that my job? Wasn’t that my area of expertise? I hoped it was because I wanted nothing more than to have her back here.
“Daddy, I’m hungry.”
Kinsley pulled me away from my planning. “So am I. How about we order pizza?”
“Good.”
I called Mom and Dad to let them know we were back.
“Hi Mom.”
“Grey, where are you?”
“Home.”
“As in here?”
“Yeah, Mom. Are you busy?”
“No. What do you need?”
“Can you come over? We just walked in and my hands are full. There isn’t any food in the house and I need to pick up a pizza.”
“I’m on the way. Where’s Marin?”
“That’s a long story and please don’t bring it up when you get here,” I mumbled so the little ears in the room didn’t hear.
“Fine. Your father and I will be there shortly.”
And they were. They walked in and Kinsley ran up to them jabbering on about the scary place with the monsters.
“What on Earth are you talking about, honey?”
“Gammie, Marnie and us got stuck in the scary cold place.”
“Grey?”
“There was an explosion while they were touring the catacombs and they were trapped down there for over ten hours.”
Mom stumbled to the closest chair. She sat at the table for a few minutes to collect herself.
“Mom, are you okay?”
“Yes, son, I am. It’s my fault. I’m the one who suggested she go there. I can’t imagine what it was like for Marin down there. She must’ve been terrified. That place is …” She shuddered.
“Mom,” I said, my tone carrying a warning as I flicked my head in Kinsley’s direction.
“Gammie, we were cold and hungry and Marnie had to go to the hospital.”
“Is she okay?”
I answered. “She had a concussion. But she’s fine.”
Mom grabbed my arm. “Trish hasn’t called. When did she come home?”
“She caught an earlier flight so just today. I’m sure she hasn’t had a chance.”
Mom wasn’t buying it at all. Her eyes fastened onto mine and she read things that only a mother was able to.
“I see. You’d better get this figured out.” That was all she said about it. “What do you need for me to do?”
“Can you stay with the kids while I grocery shop and pick up the pizza?”
“Of course. Your father and I would love to.”
I was only gone for an hour and came home with enough pizza for everyone and also food for Aaron, who Mom had already fed. There was baby food in the cabinet, which he happily gobbled down.
While I was gone, Mom helped Kinsley bathe while Dad bathed Aaron. Their bags were unpacked and the clothes sorted for washing. They really worked fast.
After we ate, Mom pulled me into my office while Dad occupied the kids.
“What the hell is going on, Grey?”
/> “What do you mean?”
“Don’t you dare play stupid with me. When we were here before you left, things between you and Marin were strained. What caused it?”
“Me, okay? I’m the dumbass who ruined it all. But now I’m going to fix it.”
“Did she really have to come home because there wasn’t room on your flight? Kinsley said she hurt her head in the explosion.”
The tension in my neck was about to cause a migraine. I took a deep, pained breath. I didn’t need Mom to add to the guilt that was already weighing me down. “Mom, the situation wasn’t ideal.” I reached into my back pocket and pulled out her letter, handing it to my mom.
Mom took it, unfolded it and then started reading. Her brows lowered and her lips pursed as she read on. “Oh, Grey, what have you done to the poor girl?”
“I screwed everything up, Mom. It’s my fault. I’m the one to blame.”
“How so?”
“It had to do with the DNA kit.”
Mom’s eyes narrowed. “Are you back to that again?”
I fisted my hands. “No! I’m done with that and I told her. Aaron is and will always be my son. But she lied and I was hurt and furious over it.”
“Lied?”
“I asked her to send the kit off and she never did. Or she said she would.”
“She said she did, but didn’t. Is that it?” Mom asked.
“Not exactly but it’s all semantics. I trusted her to do it and she didn’t. She took it upon herself to act on my behalf without consulting me and I was angry over her decision. I’m over that now, but during the time I was deliberating, I pushed her away. Now I have to bridge the gap I created. She’s in love with me. Or more to the point, she was in love with me. After that explosion and when I didn’t know whether or not she or the kids were okay, I realized just how much she meant to me. I love her too. And now I have to fix things.”
“My God, you’re dense. How did you ever make it through Harvard?”
I blew out a long breath full of frustrations. “I have no idea.”
“Good luck with getting her back. You’d better figure out a way to tell her you won’t make the same mistake again.”
From Ashes To Flames Page 27