by Julia Wolf
“It might be. I told her about your salon and she seemed interested. Tell her hi for me if it’s her.”
“I will. I can’t wait to get my hands on her gorgeous hair.”
Joe chuckled. “It’s getting pretty dark. I better head back inside. I’m so happy I’m going to see you. I miss you.”
He stepped into the building lobby. Suddenly, he was clearly visible, and I sighed. I was pretty sure I would never get tired of looking at him.
“I miss you too, Joe. I’m really looking forward to seeing you.”
“Talk soon.”
“Goodnight, Joe.”
Thirteen
It was going to be a good day. I could feel it. All my favorite clients were coming in, plus Maya. Her hair was a hairstylist’s wet dream.
When she walked into the salon, I waved at her like a complete dork from behind the reception desk.
“Hi, Maya! I’m Rachel.”
I walked out from behind the desk and offered my hand to shake, but she pulled me into a tight hug.
“I’m so happy to meet you, Rachel! Joe’s told me so many awesome things about you,” she said. Her voice was just as sultry as it had been on stage.
I brought her to my chair and finally, finally got my hands in her hair.
“What are we doing with this gorgeous mane of yours?” I asked, flipping her hair around her shoulders.
Maya watched me in the mirror. “I need a really good trim and I was thinking a few highlights around my face. Nothing extreme, just to lighten it a bit for summer.”
“Let’s do some caramel pieces, just a few shades lighter than your natural color.”
“Perfect,” she said.
While I applied the color to her hair, Maya told me all about the trip she and her husband, Lee, had just gone on. They toured Croatia and Hungary. Her description of the rugged landscapes and castles built into sides of mountains had me wanting to buy plane tickets to see it for myself.
“We went to a national park in Croatia to see waterfalls. I’m not even sure I can put into words the color of the water! It was like nothing I’ve ever seen before. There were multiple gorgeous waterfalls. That was probably my favorite place. I go all Zen mode when I’m surrounded by trees and water,” Maya said as I stood behind her, applying the last of her foils. She held up her phone to show me a picture.
I leaned in and gasped at the bright turquoise water. “Holy crap, that is stunning! Sign me up.”
Croatia had been on my list to visit since I binge-watched ER on Netflix and fell in love with Dr. Kovac. In my fantasies, Croatia was full of men that looked like him: tall, dark, and broody. Now that I knew it was also a stunningly beautiful country, I moved it to the top of my travel destination list.
While we waited for her color to process, I sat on a stool next to her, looking at the pictures from her trip and of her daughter, Hazel, and chatting about our favorite spots to hike.
After I rinsed her hair, I carefully trimmed her curls, cutting them in the natural direction they grew. Then I had her lean her head over the back of my chair and I dried her hair with the diffuser attachment on my blow-dryer.
When she sat up, she grinned at her reflection in the mirror.
“You rock, Rachel. This is exactly what I wanted.” She stood and pulled me into another tight hug. “Let’s get together for a hike soon, okay?”
“Absolutely. Maybe next weekend? I’m actually going to New York tomorrow for a hair show,” I said.
“Oh cool. Are you going to see Joe and Celia while you’re there?”
“I am going to see Joe,” I said. “He’s taking me to dinner, but won’t say where.”
I paused for a moment, racking my brain. Who is Celia?
“I’m sorry, I’m not sure I know who Celia is. Remind me?”
“Celia is Joe’s girlfriend. They live together. She’s a doll.”
Joe’s motherfucking girlfriend. I felt like I had been slapped, but I tried to keep it off my face.
“Of course, his girlfriend. I forgot her name there for a second.” I forced a smile.
“Well, I’m so glad I got to know you, Rachel. Let’s get that hike on our calendars ASAP!”
Maya breezed out of the salon with no clue she had just rocked my world. I didn’t have time to dwell on my disappointment and anger because I had another client waiting for me.
After work, Frannie, Eliza, and I were perched on stools at the wine bar.
“I knew he was a tool!” Frannie said angrily when I told her the latest Joe news. I thought she might actually be more upset than I was feeling.
“Maybe there’s an explanation…” Eliza tried, but broke off when she realized there wasn’t a plausible reason Joe hadn’t mentioned his live-in girlfriend after all these weeks.
“This is exactly why I didn’t let myself get too excited. I’ve been let down by him before. And I can’t figure out if I think he did anything wrong.” I slumped over the bar.
Frannie slapped her hand on the bar. “He did! A lie by omission is still a lie. When we see him in NYC, I’m going to give that tool a piece of my mind.” Even though she was going overboard, her sheer devotion made my eyes well up.
“You’re so sweet, Frananas. And please, never let me cross you.” I leaned my head on her shoulder.
“Are you still going to see him this weekend?” Eliza asked.
“I don’t think so. I’m pretty sure our friendship is going back into the history books,” I replied, hopefully sounding more sure than I felt.
“You don’t want to ask him for an explanation?” Eliza pressed.
“Based on how long I stayed in my shitty marriage, you might think I’m the type who sticks it out through rough times. But I think that was an anomaly and I’m actually a runner. If I’m going to have another relationship, I want it to be straightforward and honest. I want easy and fun.”
Eliza gripped my arm. “Rach, you are not a runner! You never left my side while helping me build the business, even though it was rough at first. And you stick with me even though I know my relationship choices frustrate you. Maybe this isn’t the right time, or not the right guy. But please don’t doubt yourself.” There was force behind her quiet words.
I put my arms around both of my girls’ shoulders. “You two are the best friends I could ask for. You know I love you guys, right?” I dropped my arms and picked my phone up off the bar, staring at the black screen. “I’m just so disappointed. I look forward to our texts every day after work. I’ve developed a little routine. I go home, get in my comfy clothes, and curl up with my phone. And now that I know he has a girlfriend, it has to end.”
“Maybe it’s for the best then. If you’re home, texting Joe all night, you’re not getting out and meeting people,” Eliza pointed out.
“Maybe you’re right.” I sighed.
“We’re going to go out in NYC, flirt with cute boys, and get your mind off that guy. I’ll confiscate your phone if I have to!” Frannie declared.
We called it a night after that so Frannie and I could go and pack for our trip the next day.
At home, I had a quiet moment to process my thoughts. Neither of us had crossed the line physically, though I had thought we were flirting in our texts to each other. All of that could have been one-sided though, like history repeating itself.
If Joe viewed me as just a friend, why wouldn’t he have shared such a big part of his life? Maybe he actually was a tool—just like Frannie said—stringing me along to keep his options open.
I shouldn’t have been surprised when my phone buzzed with a text, but I jumped when it rattled on my nightstand.
Him: You’re going to love the restaurant I’m taking you to tomorrow night!
Me: I’m not sure I’m going to be able to make it anymore.
He sent me a video chat request. I leaned against my headboard and pressed “accept.”
Joe was sitting on a tan leather couch. He frowned, a crease between his eyebrows.
&nb
sp; “Hey, Joe,” I said softly. He was so damn handsome. I wished we had gotten the chance to have one real kiss, just so I could know how his lips felt on mine and how he tasted. Then again, that would have made giving him up now even harder.
“What’s going on, Rachel?”
“It’s just going to be so busy, doing the show, networking, and meetings, I don’t think it’ll work out.”
“Really?”
He didn’t believe me. I didn’t blame him. My voice wavered and I was looking down at my lap. I took a deep breath and focused on his face on the screen.
“I did Maya’s hair today. She showed me all the awesome pictures from her trip.”
“Yeah, I talked to her a couple days ago. But what does that—”
“I told her I was going to New York tomorrow. She wondered if I would be seeing you and Celia. I’m really surprised you never told me you live with your girlfriend,” I continued, my voice growing harder. “Did she wonder who you’ve been texting every night? Come to think of it, didn’t she walk into the apartment the first time we video chatted? Is that why you got off the phone so fast?”
I probably didn’t have the right to feel as angry as I was, but even if he saw us as just friends, not telling me about his girlfriend was inexcusable.
Joe groaned and tugged his hair.
“Shit. Rachel, Celia and I have been broken up for over a month. She did come home when I was talking to you, but we weren’t together by then. I was sleeping on the couch until I could move into the house, but we were both miserable with that arrangement, so I left and have been staying with friends since,” Joe rushed to explain.
I put the phone on a pillow and rubbed my temples. His explanation felt true, but it was still hard to believe. I wanted to believe him, though. With everything in me, I wanted Joe to be the good guy I’d convinced myself he was.
Joe added, “I’ve had so much going on, and Maya knew Celia wasn’t moving with me to Maryland, but I guess I never told her we were officially done. I should have told you, Rach, but I don’t know...you never asked. I wasn’t sure how much you would want to know about an ex-girlfriend.”
“She was hardly your past when you were still living in the same space.” I sighed. “But I think I get it. We’re still finding our footing and you didn’t want to rock the boat. But, Joe, your friendship means so much to me and I really need you to be truthful from now on.”
"This, what's happening here, this is the beginning of something really big. I promise I won't keep anything from you."
"Did you just quote Garden State at me, Joe Silver?"
He bowed his head sheepishly, looking out from under his thick, sooty lashes. "I did. But I meant it."
We watched each other through the screen for a long moment. I smiled tentatively at him, and he gave me a small, crooked smile back.
“So, you moved out?”
“Yeah. I’ve basically been couch surfing while I finish out the school year.” He leaned forward, the phone shaking as he shifted. “Will you still meet me for dinner tomorrow?” He looked hopeful.
I chewed on my lip, then nodded. “Okay, Joe.”
In the next second, the sound of a baby crying in the background had me raising my eyebrows.
“Secret baby?” I asked.
He glanced over his shoulder at the wall behind him and chuckled quietly. “Ha, no. That’s my friend Jonah’s kid. I’ve been crashing with him for a few days, but with the baby, I feel like I’m wearing out my welcome quickly. I am more than ready to move into my own place.” Then he said softly, “Good luck at your show tomorrow.”
“Thank you, hope you get some sleep. Goodnight, Joe.”
“Are we okay?”
“I think so.”
“Okay. Goodnight, sweet girl.”
“Night.”
Fourteen
The motion of the train was rocking me to sleep. I rested my head on the window and closed my eyes for a moment.
“Rachel.”
I squinted at Frannie and inhaled a whiff of the coffee she held under my nose.
“Look what I have for you!”
“I guess I’ll wake up for coffee. I’m just so cozy and it’s so early!” I nestled down in my seat, accepting the cup from my friend.
“Sister, you have been sleeping for two hours! We only have an hour until we’re in the city. I thought I better wake you now so you’re not groggy when we get there,” Frannie said.
“Two hours? I feel like I just closed my eyes a few minutes ago. Sorry I’m such a boring travel companion.” I sat up in my seat, sipping the surprisingly good coffee Frannie had managed to acquire on the train.
“It’s cool, I had my Kindle and my music, so I kept myself entertained. Did you have a rough night?” she asked, looking at me sympathetically. As far as Frannie knew, Joe had a girlfriend and I was done with him.
“I talked to Joe last night.”
Frannie turned in her seat to fully face me.
“And? What did the bastard have to say for himself?” she asked.
“He doesn’t have a girlfriend anymore.”
She narrowed her eyes, not looking convinced at all.
“So then why did Maya think he had a live-in girlfriend?”
“Maya had outdated information. He did live with his ex, up until a little over a month ago. He’s been staying with friends while he finishes out the school year.”
“Hmmm...I’m going to sound like Eliza with this question, but do you think he broke up with his girlfriend because he saw you?” Frannie asked.
“What? No! The timing is just a coincidence,” I told her with absolute confidence.
“Maybe.” She considered this for a moment. “Well, now I have all this misplaced anger I need to get out. Maybe while you’re with your honey tonight, I’ll find my own fella who’ll allow me to take out my aggression on him.”
I had no doubt she would have New York men dropping at her feet just as she did in Baltimore.
“I thought you were going to hang out with some old friends at the hair show?”
“That’s the plan,” Frannie shrugged, “but you never know what kind of hijinks I might get into.”
“Just be good, okay?”
Frannie and I shared a similar view of sex. If two consenting adults wanted to get down, as long as there was a condom involved, I was all for it. I didn’t think love, or even warm feelings had to be involved for sex to be fun and enjoyable. Frannie was even more liberated than me, but then again, she hadn’t spent almost a decade married to the first man she ever slept with.
“I’m so good.” Frannie was quiet for a beat, then nudged my shoulder. “Now that there’s no girlfriend in the picture, are you going to make your move, lady?”
I sighed.
“There is absolutely no way I will ever make the first move with Joe. I don’t know how all this man-woman stuff works. I haven’t been on a real date since high school! If I just wanted him as a fuck buddy, then sure, I’d just jump him. But I already know if I really had him, I’d want way more than that.”
Right after Joe rejected me, I turned to David for comfort and to soothe my wounded pride. He had trailed after me for a long time. When I finally gave him a chance, he was all over me. We went to movies and a few dinners, but that made up the extent of my dating experience. My post-divorce sexcapades involved meeting my suitor at a bar, then heading back to whoever’s place was closest to get down to business. No muss, no fuss. So the idea of romance—candles and flowers, enjoying the slow burn—was completely new to me.
“Girl, look. If he’s into you, and I’m sure he is because you are sublime, he will make it clear.”
She was probably right. My plan was to enjoy the moments I spent with Joe and not fixate on what could happen in the future.
When we arrived in New York City, we took a cab to our hotel near the convention center. Since the hair color company I was working for would be footing the bill, Frannie and I decided to splurge on
our own rooms.
I changed out of my comfortable travel clothes and transformed myself into my other persona: Fierce Diva Hairstylist.
When doing demos on a platform or stage I always wore all black so the color of the hair I styled stood out instead of my clothes. My outfits were like a costume, nothing like what I wore in my real life.
As confident as I was in myself and my skills, standing up on a stage in front of hundreds of my colleagues could be intimidating. And now I had the added factor of the reputation of Eliza’s and my business to think of.
But this was what I loved to do. All of my insecurities and worries fell away when I stepped foot in front of my audience. Because they were my people. They were there because they loved doing hair as much as I did.
Frannie and I met in the lobby so we could head to the convention center together.
“Damn, girl, damn!” Frannie circled around me to check me out.
I wore a ruffley, black chiffon top, which would have been demure except from my shoulders to between my breasts was sheer mesh. On the bottom, I wore high-waisted cigarette pants. I broke my own rule by wearing impossibly high (yet surprisingly comfortable) ankle-strap platform pumps. To complete my transformation, my normally wavy hair hung pin-straight, my eyes were smokey, and my lips were shiny.
“Ready to rock?” I looped my arm through hers.
She gave me an exaggerated wink. “Let’s hit it, hot stuff!”
The convention center was enormous, but crowded with hairstylists milling around. There were nearly five hundred beauty companies lining the exhibit hall, showing off their products and tools. It was hard not to get distracted by all the pretties, but Frannie pulled me along. We weaved our way through the throngs of people until we finally found the backstage area.
“You have to be Rachel Sachs,” boomed a small man with a handlebar mustache and a thick New York accent.
“I am!” I held out my hand. Instead of shaking it, he dramatically pulled it to his mouth and gave it a loud kiss.
“Pleasure to meet you. I am Marco, head of education for Wella. Anthony described your beauty and vermillion tresses quite well,” he said, and I pinched my lips together to hold in a snort. “What he didn’t say is what a vixen you are!” He looked me up and down, his forwardness making me chuckle. In my experience, straight men in the beauty industry tended to be super smooth with the ladies and Marco was no exception.