“It makes a great deal of sense that her negative energy was released from her spirit and into this house. I began to suspect your newfound ability to read minds soon after that happened. Now my suspicions are confirmed.”
“So Nina’s powers transferred from her to me?”
“It seems so. Whether it was that Nina’s energy somehow attached to your aura, or whether it simply triggered something that was a latent power you already possessed, remains to be seen.”
“Lady Azura, I don’t want this power. I don’t want to turn out like Nina. Can you help me?” I begged.
She clasped my hands. “Of course I can help you, Sara. You are going to have to follow what I say and work very hard, but if you want to, we can get rid of this power together.”
Chapter 10
I heard the determination in Lady Azura’s voice, but I was worried. What if I couldn’t get rid of this power? Would I end up like Nina? Driving everyone I loved away from me? Landing in the loony bin?
Lady Azura seemed to be able to read my thoughts. She patted my hand. “Nina was weak and fell victim to her powers. But you, Sara, are strong. Much stronger than she. Perhaps stronger than I.” Her brown eyes twinkled. “This negative energy has been swirling around the house for a while now. It has latched on to you. It is not like your other powers.”
Now that she had gotten to the bottom of what was happening in the house, Lady Azura seemed reinvigorated. She strode around her room, opening drawers and cabinets, gathering crystals and bringing them to the table.
“I know. I hate it,” I said as my eyes followed her around the room. “I think it’s made me depressed or something. I’ve been moping around all week, feeling sorry for myself because no one cares that my birthday is coming up. And because I’ve been reading my friends’ minds. And every time I do, I feel bad about what I hear.”
“Together we will help you learn to block the ability,” she said. “It may be difficult at first, but the more you do it, the easier it will become for you.” She spoke with such conviction that I started to believe we could really do this.
“You mean it’s like riding a bike or learning to whistle?”
“Exactly.”
Haltingly, I told her how I had been able to block it out a few times on my own by imagining I was putting a bubble up around me.
“Sara, that is wonderful news,” Lady Azura exclaimed as her face lit up. “That was your own instincts, guiding you in the right direction.” The worried look on her face was now completely gone. She blinked her eyes rapidly as she spoke to me. “Let’s use this bubble you talk about; it is your shield. Visualize it now. But instead of using it defensively, to block out others and fend off their thoughts, use it as a positive energy force. Try now,” she urged.
So I tried to conjure up the bubble. I closed my eyes. Thought positive thoughts. Opened my eyes. I could see the bubble shimmering and silvery all around me, like I was inside some freaky spacecraft.
“I did it!” I shouted, springing up. “Can you see it? Can you see the bubble?”
She smiled and shook her head. “I cannot see it. But you have astonishing powers, Sara. And unlike Nina, you are able not only to block this negative energy, but to produce a positive force to change its very nature. You did not bring this on yourself, nor did you invite it, so it will be far easier for you to offset it.”
We spent the next two hours practicing. It was one of the most exhausting things I had ever done. It was so hard at first. I couldn’t produce the bubble quite so easily the next few times I tried. At first it was like a weak force field. I could actually watch as Lady Azura’s thoughts bounced against it, but then it would drop like a popped soap bubble, and I would be able to hear her thoughts rushing in. I could hear her worrying about me. Worrying about my father and his fears about the house. I suspected that she was letting me hear her thoughts. On purpose. That she was able to let me hear them, or not, at will.
I tried harder.
And gradually I got better at it.
By now it was evening. It was almost time for dinner, I realized, but I wasn’t even hungry. I felt drained, but happy, too. I jumped up from my chair. “Can I go practice?” I asked her. “I want to go find Lily. Or some of my other friends, and see if I can block them.”
She nodded. “Go ahead, my dear. Go and be strong.”
I raced out the door and down the sidewalk toward Lily’s house.
Just as I skidded to a stop at her front walkway, I saw her emerging from the door with Miranda, Avery, and Marlee.
“Sara!” yelled Lily. She looked happy to see me. But was she really? I started to tune in to her thoughts. It would be so easy to do. So tempting to listen in. I’d discovered the hard way that kids my age so often said one thing and thought another. I could feel the temptation start to win.
Then I stopped myself. I didn’t want to end up like Nina. Closing my eyes, I conjured up the bubble.
It worked. Lily’s thoughts bounced off my bubble. I refused to hear them. Maybe she was glad to see me, and maybe she wasn’t.
“Hey, guys!” I said, swallowing my hurt feelings. So what if they were all hanging out together? Without me. Maybe it was a school thing or something.
“We were just hanging out!” said Lily as the three of them joined me. “And we were about to walk over to your house to see if you were around. I know you were in a hurry to get home, so I figured you had to help out your great-grandmother. And now here you are!”
I chose to believe her. I chose not to think that they so were not on their way to see me, and that she made up the story so my feelings wouldn’t be hurt. I chose not to let down my bubble and read their thoughts to see what they really were thinking. I chose, as my dad might put it, to give them the benefit of the doubt.
And ended up having a really fun time.
The early evening air was cool and smelled of damp earth and sea air. We decided to walk down to the beach. I love the beach when no one else is there. We found an old Frisbee half-buried in the sand and spent the next half hour tossing it, collecting shells, just having fun. I kept wishing I’d brought my camera with me. And then it was time to get home for dinner.
When I got home, my father was already in the kitchen. He still seemed stressed out. Grim-faced. He was breading chicken breasts and boiling water for potatoes. I helped by making a salad with my own homemade vinaigrette that Mrs. Randazzo had taught me how to make. My dad usually loved that dressing, and I secretly hoped it would cheer him up. But he remained pretty quiet as he prepared dinner.
As soon as I had the chance, I escaped from dinner prepping and went to find Lady Azura. She was in her room, sitting in her old padded rocking chair, watching the news and shaking her head in dismay at what was going on in the world.
I told her about the success I’d had with my friends. She seemed pleased.
“I’m worried, though,” I said. “My dad still seems really stressed. About money. About the house. Not that I read his thoughts or anything,” I added quickly.
“You’ve done well today, Sara. Now you must continue to think positive thoughts,” said Lady Azura. “I believe your father is just worried about you and your safety. I don’t think he will take any drastic steps anytime soon. Continue as you did today. Block out thoughts and embrace the good. Together we will eventually rid the house of this negative energy.”
“But isn’t there more that we can do?” I asked. “It all feels so . . . defensive, rather than offensive. We keep trying to block, to fend off, to think away the bad stuff. I feel like we ought to be able to take charge, chase it away. Can’t we, like, summon Nina and get her to take back the energy she left here?”
But Lady Azura shook her head, clearly unwilling to consider what I was suggesting. “Sara, that is unnecessary. We needn’t meddle with this negative energy more than we absolutely have to. It will be
enough to believe in your power to think positively. It might not be the fastest solution, but it will work eventually. We will reclaim our house!”
“But I’m scared to go to sleep. What if I have more bad dreams? What if I wake up in that awful dark cloud again?”
Lady Azura smiled. “You must do what you do naturally. Tap into your capacity to love. Count your blessings. Before you fall asleep, think about the people in life that you love the most dearly. That is the best way to drive away the negative energy. I do that every night, whether my house is under attack by dark energy or not.”
I nodded. Thanked her and left. But I wasn’t convinced.
“I may need some help fixing the garage,” my dad said to us over dinner. “Some of the wall that came down revealed some real structural damage. We’ll need to fix it if we want to improve the resale value of this place. And the truck is going to need quite a bit of bodywork. Vern sent me to a good guy over in Ocean Heights who is going to work on it for me, but it’s going to be expensive.”
Lady Azura and I both nodded. Then we all kept eating. The only sound was the scrape of forks on plates for a while. I resisted the strong urge to read my dad’s mind. I felt that if I did, I would be scared by what I heard. I just knew he was thinking about how dangerous he thought this house was. He was worried about me. And even about Lady Azura. I hadn’t liked the sound of the phrase “resale value.” Was he really thinking about convincing Lady Azura to sell the house? I pushed the unsettling thought away.
I knew it was up to me to change the energy in the house. To change my father’s mind. I needed to do something beyond what Lady Azura advised. Something more powerful than just thinking happy thoughts. I needed to root out the problem, like a weed. To stop the negative energy from doing more damage.
An idea began to form in my mind.
Later that night I was in bed, finishing my English reading, when my dad poked his head into my room.
“Got a sec, kiddo?”
“I suppose I can tear myself away from The Odyssey for a second,” I said with a grin, putting down my book.
He sat down at the edge of my bed. He looked more tired than usual, but still handsome, in a crinkly-eyed, rumpled-hair, needs-a-shave kind of way.
“Listen, kiddo, I hope you were okay with our doing something special for your birthday on a different day,” he said. “I know you have that party to go to on Saturday, and it’s kind of a crazy weekend for me, work-wise. And now I don’t have a car, either. The body shop says it won’t be ready until at least Thursday, and much as I love driving Lady Azura’s boat”—he rolled his eyes—“I don’t want to drive it any kind of distance. So maybe we can plan a getaway for, say, next weekend? I was thinking—”
“Dad,” I interrupted. “No worries. I totally understand.” And I did. The last thing I wanted was for him to be feeling bad about my birthday, on top of all the other stuff he was worrying about. “I really wasn’t upset about not doing something together,” I continued. “I was more upset because Lily’s being kind of, I don’t know, weird and standoffish about this party she’s having. And it’s a party for Jayden. You know, the guy I went to the semiformal dance with a few weeks ago. And she pretty much forgot all about the fact that it was the same day as my birthday. But I think she feels bad about forgetting.”
He opened his mouth as though he wanted to say something, then closed it again. I had a sudden urge to read his thoughts, but again I resisted. I put up the bubble. This time it was easy. And then I was glad I wasn’t intruding into his personal thoughts.
“I know friend stuff can be tough,” he said awkwardly. “But you just have to trust that you and Lily are really good friends. And not worry too much about the small stuff. Just think positive, kiddo.”
I smiled. All this talk about positive thinking! But I knew he was trying. I knew he worried all the time that I didn’t have a mother around to say these kinds of motherly things. They sounded a little awkward coming from my dad, but it made me love him all the more for trying. “Thanks, Daddy-o,” I said, using my old nickname for him. That made him smile.
He patted my leg and stood up. “Try to get some sleep.”
I dropped my book onto the floor next to my bed and snuggled into my pillows. He kissed me on the forehead and turned out the light.
But I didn’t fall asleep. As soon as I was sure I heard him walk down the hall and into his room, I turned my light back on and sat up. I had my own plan of how to fix the problems in my house, and I was going to try it tonight.
Chapter 11
I finished my Odyssey reading and even got ahead in my social studies chapter before I decided that everyone else in the house must be asleep. Usually reading one page of my social studies textbook was enough to put me to sleep, but not tonight. I was wide-awake. Apprehensive, but excited, too. The clock said 12:04 a.m. What I planned to do was risky, because Lady Azura was a night owl. But she’d yawned through dinner and grumbled several times about turning in early. So I had to hope for the best.
I didn’t dare go downstairs to Lady Azura’s summoning room. Even if she had gone to bed, I couldn’t risk it. She was a light sleeper and would probably hear me.
I swung my legs out of bed and tiptoed over to my bureau, where I’d hid the candle I had borrowed from Lady Azura’s room earlier in the evening. I carried it over to my desk, which I’d decluttered in anticipation of this occasion. I lit the candle and then sat down, staring into the flame.
I didn’t know how to summon a spirit properly, but I’d done it once before with Jayden’s brother, Marco, and I felt pretty sure I could do it again.
“Nina Oliver,” I whispered, closing my eyes. “Nina, if you can hear me, please show yourself. I—I am Sara Collins. I want to help you. Please?”
I opened my eyes. Nothing. My room was the same old room. Cluttered bureau. Lots of clothes all over the floor. Books and photography stuff strewn around near my reading chair in the corner. I was a naturally untidy person, and my dad wasn’t big on reminding me to clean my room. Whatever. I sighed. This wasn’t working.
A cloud must have finished passing over the moon, because my room filled with silver light. I could see the picture of my mother next to my bed from where I sat. I looked over at it, trying to gain strength and resolve. I clutched the moldavite crystal Lady Azura had given me. I tried again.
“Nina Oliver? I was hoping you could just, um, drop by for a chat? I know this is a little unconventional, me summoning you up here and all. But please. Could you show yourself?”
I opened my eyes. Still nothing.
Wait.
There was something.
The candle flickered. Went out.
And then lit again.
My foot began tingling. My breathing grew shallow. A silver shimmer that I thought was the mirror turned out to be behind me, reflected in the mirror in front of me. I turned around slowly. A spirit was beginning to materialize.
I realized I’d been holding my breath, and I let it out quickly, shakily. My heart thudded in my chest.
Nina Oliver was now a solid-looking form, faintly glowing in the dim light from the moon. She strode across the room and stood in front of me. Hastily, I stood up to meet her.
“Well? What do you want?” she demanded.
It was the same woman. The woman from my dreams. Long white hair, down to the shoulders. A business suit and sensible shoes. If you looked at her quickly, and didn’t know she was a spirit, you might mistake her for a lawyer or a banker. But if you really paid attention, you would notice something wrong. Something off about the expression on her face. Her eyes. They kept darting from side to side, then down to the floor, not meeting my gaze. She looked annoyed, like I’d interrupted her in the middle of an important business call.
Out of the corner of my eye, I became aware of a swirling movement. It was the dark cloud. It seemed
to grow larger and larger, billowing around the room. Then it swirled around the two of us. It seemed to engulf us, so I could only see her as though through a gauzy haze. I felt cold all of a sudden. The hopeless feeling returned. What was I doing? Why was I even attempting this? This spirit wasn’t going to change. She wasn’t going to help me. She was mean and hateful even in death. The way she was in life.
I tried to control my thoughts. Don’t lose hope. Don’t judge. Don’t think anything critical. She had a hard time when she was alive. Maybe on some level she really wants my help. Try. Don’t give up.
“Oh, so that’s what you think, is it?” she practically spat at me. “You think I want your help? That I am to be pitied?”
She can hear my thoughts.
“Of course I can hear your thoughts! Don’t you realize how powerful this ability made me in life? No one could stop me. No one was invulnerable.”
I tried to conjure up the bubble. The one that I’d been practicing, which blocked me from hearing other people’s thoughts. Maybe it could help block my thoughts from reaching her.
“It’s no use. You cannot block me.”
The bubble failed. A wave of nausea clenched my stomach, and I suddenly felt dizzy. I clutched the edge of my desk. I had to do something. It was an awful feeling, knowing my thoughts were swirling from my head into hers. Now I understood how other people must feel. Maybe they didn’t know that I was hearing their thoughts. But maybe at some subconscious level, they did.
“Please. Stop,” I said out loud.
She laughed, but not in a nice way.
I had to struggle to stay calm. Not to cry. Not to get angry.
“Don’t fight this power,” she said. “You, too, can grow stronger. Smarter. Better than everyone around you. Why do you not see it as a gift? Something only you and I and very few others share?”
Positive. Think positive thoughts. I closed my eyes. Conjured up the image of my mother in my mind.
Giving Up the Ghost Page 6