by Tulsidas
Is as omniscient as Tripurari—
Would he then search for a woman like one who does not know,
He who is Shri’sxliii lord, the abode of wisdom, and the enemy of demons?
And then again, Shambhu’s words are never false,
For, as everyone knows, Shiv is all-seeing.’
Her mind was beset with this boundless doubt,
And neither understanding nor explanation arose in her heart.
Even though Bhavani did not say anything out loud,
Har, who can see into the heart, understood everything.
He said, ‘Listen, Sati, your nature is that of a woman—
Never hold such doubt in your heart!
He whose story the Rishi Kumbhaj related,
And whose true worship I explained to the muni—
He is that very same, my beloved god, Raghubir,
Who is forever worshipped by steadfast munis.
He is that same Ram upon whom steadfast munis and yogis, Siddhis and sages
Meditate with pure and unwavering hearts;
Whose glory is sung by the Vedas, the Puranas, and Shastras
By crying, “He is not this, he is not this”;
Who is the all-pervading spirit of the universe,
Lord of all the worlds, master of maya;
And who, for the benefit of his devotees, by his own free will
Took incarnate form as the jewel of the clan of Raghu.’
Shiv’s explanation did not convince Sati
Even though he repeated it several times.
Recognizing the strength of Hari’s maya
Mahesh, smiling, said—
(51)
‘If there is such great doubt in your mind,
Why don’t you go and test him?
I will sit here, in the shade of this banyan tree,
Till you come back to me.
Think, use your judgement, strive to do that which
May resolve your overwhelming perplexity and confusion.’
So off went Sati with Shiv’s permission—
‘Now, what shall I do?’ she wondered.
Meanwhile, Shambhu, reflecting, came to the conclusion that,
‘There is no hope for Daksh’s daughter,
For her doubts have not been dispelled even by my words.
But there is nothing to be gained by going against destiny,
And whatever Ram has ordained will come to pass—
So why speculate or dispute it any further and prolong the argument?’
So saying, he began to chant the name of Hari,
While Sati proceeded towards the Lord, that abode of bliss.
Again and again she thought and she pondered.
Then, assuming Sita’s form,
She went ahead upon on the same path
Along which the king of men, Ram, was coming.
(52)
Lakshman, seeing Uma’s disguise,
Was astonished and greatly perplexed.
He could say nothing but became very grave—
He of the steadfast mind knew well the glory of the Lord.
The Lord of the gods recognized Sati’s deception—
All-seeing, pervading all hearts,
Meditating upon whom removes all ignorance,
He was the same all-knowing Ram, supreme God.
Sati tried to deceive even him—
See the power of the female disposition!
But Ram acknowledged to himself the strength of his own maya
And smiling, spoke in sweet tones.
Folding his hands, the Lord saluted her,
And gave his father’s name as well as his own.
He then asked, ‘Where is Brishketu?
And why are you wandering alone in the forest?’
Hearing Ram’s sweet but profoundly perceptive words,
Sati was greatly abashed.
Fearful and afraid, her heart full of apprehension,
She made her way back to Mahesh.
(53)
‘I did not listen to Shankar,
And imposed my own ignorance upon Ram.
Now what answer will I give Shiv upon my return?’
Dreadful anguish filled her breast.
Ram saw that Sati was suffering,
And revealed some of his glory to her.
As Sati walked along the path, she saw a strange and marvellous spectacle—
Ahead of her was Ram himself, with Shri and his brother!
Turning, she looked back and saw again the Lord,
And with him were his brother and Sita, gloriously attired!
Wherever she looked, she saw the Lord enthroned,
And attending upon him wise and accomplished holy men and munis.
She saw innumerable Shivs, Vidhis and Vishnus,
Each more splendid than the others in their boundless glory and grandeur.
She saw the gods in many and various forms,
All paying homage at the Lord’s feet.
She saw Satis, Vidhatris and Indiras too,xliv
Countless and incomparable.
Whatever the forms the gods assumed,
According to those were the forms of these goddesses, their consorts.
(54)
Wherever she looked, she saw Raghupati.
There, too, were all the gods and with them were their Shaktis,xlv
And all created things, animate and inanimate, that are in this world—
She saw them all, in many shapes and forms.
Assuming many guises, the gods worshipped the Lord,
But of Ram, she saw no other guise—
Though she saw Raghupati countless times with Sita,
He did not assume different forms.
It was always the same Raghubar, the same Lakshman and Sita—
Seeing their constant forms, Sati grew afraid.
Her heart trembled, and losing all perception,
She shut her eyes and sank down upon the path.
When she opened her eyes and looked around again,
Daksh’s daughter saw no one there.
Bowing her head again and again at Ram’s feet,
She returned to where waited her lord of the mountains.
When she reached Mahesh,
He smiled and asked if she were well.
‘What was the manner in which you tested him?
Come, truthfully tell me all,’ he said.
(55)
Sati had now understood Raghubir’s glory—
Afraid, she hid the truth from Shiv.
‘I did not try to test him, lord
I merely paid him homage as you do.
What you said could not be false—
I am certain of that in my heart.’
Then Shankar, through meditation, saw and
Understood all that Sati had done.
Once more he bowed his head to the strength of Ram’s maya
Which had caused even Sati to speak an untruth.
‘The future ordained by Hari will prevail,’
Reflected all-wise Shambhu in his heart.
But Sati had assumed Sita’s form,
And great desolation arose in Shiv’s heart.
‘If I were to love Sati now as I did before,
I will commit a great wrong, and the path of devotion will be mine no longer.
She is most chaste, she cannot be abandoned,
But to love her will be a grievous sin.’
Mahesh did not speak a word aloud,
But his heart burned with anguish.
(56)
Then Shankar bowed his head at the Lord’s feet,
And as he meditated upon Ram, he realized,
‘As long as Sati remains in this body, I cannot touch her!’
So Shiv resolved in his mind.
Reflecting thus, Shankar of the steadfast mind
Turned towards home, meditating upon Raghubir.
As he walked came a glorious cry from the heavens,
‘Hail Mahesh, glory to you, who has shown such firm devotion!
Who but you could have taken this vow,
You, Ram’s devotee, and mighty, all-powerful God!’
Hearing this voice from the sky, Sati’s heart grew troubled.
Hesitantly, she asked Shiv,
‘Tell me, O compassionate lord, what vow is this that you have taken,
You who are the abode of truth, and merciful to the distressed?’
But though Sati asked many times, in many ways,
The enemy of Tripur did not reply.
In her heart Sati supposed
That the all-seeing Shiv had understood all,
‘I tried to deceive Shambhu!
Woman that I am, by nature foolish and ignorant!’
(57A)
Water, when mixed with milk, sells at a similar price—
See how this mixture is like the ways of love!
The moment the sourness of deceit is added
The lovers separate like curds and whey, and love loses its flavour and delight.
(57B)
Her heart full of regret, and realizing what she had done,
Her anxiety knew no bounds.
‘Shiv is an infinite ocean of compassion,
So he does not mention my offence aloud!’
Bhavani looked at Shankar’s countenance and understood—
‘My lord has abandoned me!’ She was distracted with grief.
She understood her mistake, but there was nothing she could say—
The anguish in her heart was as intense as the heat of a furnace.
When Brishketu saw Sati so full of sorrow,
He began to relate pleasant and pleasing tales.
Thus, telling stories and recounting various legends along the way,
The lord of the world, Vishvanath, reached Kailash.
There, remembering his vow, Shambhu
Sat down in the lotus pose under a banyan tree.
Shankar withdrew into his own true self,
And passed into samadhi, profound, endless, infinite.
Sati dwelt on Kailash,
Great sorrow in her heart;
No one knew her secret grief,
The days passed like aeons.
(58)
A new and daily grief made Sati’s heart heavy—
‘When will I cross this ocean of sorrow,
I, who was disrespectful to the lord of the Raghus
And then believed my own lord’s words to be untrue?
For these faults Fate has rewarded me,
And bestowed upon me that which I deserved.
But now, O Vidhi, with Shankar having turned his face away from me,
It does not befit you to keep me alive!’
The weariness of her heart cannot be told.
Wisely, Sati then meditated upon Ram himself—
‘The Lord who is called the merciful one
Whom the Vedas celebrate as the destroyer of distress,
Him I beseech with folded hands
To free me quickly from this body of mine.
If I have any love for Shiv’s feet,
And if that vow of love is true in thought, word and deed,
Hear me, O all-seeing Lord,
And quickly find a way
By which I may effortlessly die,
So that this intolerable agony may pass.’
(59)
Thus was the daughter of Prajesh afflicted
With sorrow so cruel and intense that it cannot be described.
Eighty-seven thousand years passed,
And immortal Shambhu broke his samadhi.
As Shiv began to chant the name of Ram,
Sati knew that the lord of the world had awakened.
She went to Shambhu and bowed in reverence at his feet—
Shankar gave her a seat facing him
And began relating Hari’s stories, so filled with joy and delight.
It was at that very time, that Daksh became Prajesh—
Vidhi, considering him able and deserving in every way,
Made him the supreme lord of created beings.
When Daksh attained this high title
Great arrogance filled his heart—
Never has one been born in this world,
Who has acquired power and not become intoxicated by it.
Daksh gathered all the munis together
And ordered them to hold a great fire-sacrifice
To which he respectfully invited all the gods
Who receive a share of the sacrificial offerings.
(60)
Kinnaras, Nagas, Siddhas and Gandharvas set off,
And all the gods with their wives—
All except for Vishnu, Viranchi and Mahesh—
All the gods made ready their chariots and set forth.
Sati saw their chariots in the sky,
So many of them, gaily decorated, flying past,
As celestial nymphs sang songs so sweet
That, hearing them, even munis were distracted from their meditations.
When she asked, Shiv explained.
Hearing of her father’s fire-sacrifice, she felt a little happier.
‘If Mahesh gives me permission,
I will use this excuse to visit my father’s house and stay there for a few days.’
Her heart was still heavy from her husband’s renunciation of their love,
But she, poor woman, conscious of her transgression, had uttered not a word in protest;
Now, afraid, hesitant, steeped in love,
Sati spoke these sweet and gentle words—
‘There’s great rejoicing in my father’s house.
If my lord permits,
I will go, O compassionate one,
To attend that celebration in duty and respect.’
(61)
‘Your suggestion is good and it pleases me,’ said Shiv,
‘But it is not feasible since he has not sent you an invitation.
Daksh has invited all his daughters
But because of his enmity with me, he has left you out.
Once, in Brahma’s assembly he was displeased with me,
And because of that he shows us disrespect today.
If you go without being invited, Bhavani,
Neither propriety nor any affection or regard will remain.
Even though there is no doubt that it is possible to go
To the house of a friend, a master, a father, or a guru without invitation,
Going where someone holds a grudge against you
Results in nothing good.’
Shambhu tried to explain this to her in many ways,
But Sati, in destiny’s grip, did not understand.
The Lord said, ‘In my opinion, it is not right
To go without being invited.’
He made every effort to convince her but saw that despite all his explanations,
Daksh’s daughter would not stay.
So, assigning the best of his servants to accompany her,
Tripurari bade her farewell.
(62)
When Bhavani reached her father’s house,
Out of fear of Daksh, no one greeted her or paid her homage.
Only her mother met her with respect and affection
And her sisters with many smiles.
Daksh did not utter a word of welcome nor ask after Sati’s well-being,
Rather, he burned with rage to see her;
Sati then went to look at the fire-sacrifice,
But nowhere did she see Shambhu’s share of the offering.
She then understood what Shankar had been saying,
And her heart burned within her at this insult to her lord.
Her earlier sorrow did not overwhelm her heart
As much as the great grief that overtook her now,
For though there are many cruel sorrows in the world,
The most difficult to bear is an insult to one’s own.
Thinking of this, Sati was overcome with fury;
Her mother tried in many ways to calm her.
She could not bear this insult to Shiv,
And her heart would not be pacified.
Reproaching violently all those gathered there,
She cried out in anger.
(63)
‘Listen to me, all you gathered here, you great saints and holy men—
Those who have insulted Shankar or heard him being insulted,
They will get their reward at once.
My father too shall dearly rue it!
Whenever the saints, Shambhu, or Shri’s lord are spoken ill of or maligned,
The prescribed and principled course of action is
To cut out, if you can, the tongue of the one who speaks ill,
Or close your ears and run away!
The Spirit of the Universe, Mahesh, Purari,
The father of the world, benefactor and friend to all—
It is him that my foolish and wicked father has insulted!
This body of mine was born of Daksh’s seed—
For that reason I discard it at once,
Holding in my heart moon-crested Brishketu!’
As she said this, her body was consumed by yogic fire,
And loud lamentation arose from the gathering.
Hearing of Sati’s death, Shambhu’s servants
Began to lay waste the sacrificial feast.
Seeing the destruction of the fire-sacrifice,
The great sage Bhrigu protected the munis.
(64)
When Shankar heard the news
He, in his fury, created Virbhadra44 and sent him there—
He laid waste the fire-sacrifice,
And gave all the gods their just reward.
As is known around the world, Daksh was reduced to the same plight
To which are reduced those who turn away from Shambhu.
The whole world knows this story—
Which is why I have related it only in brief.
Sati, dying, asked Hari for this boon
That she find love at Shiv’s feet in every successive birth.
For that reason, in Himgiri’sxlvi home,
She was reborn as Parvati.
From the moment that Uma was born in the mountain king’s home,
Felicity and prosperity pervaded it.
Munis set up their hermitages all about
In suitable abodes upon the mountain that Himvatxlvii gave to them.