“She’d like the Red Sox bear.”
Becca actually jumped up and down. She was seriously far too cute.
I took the bear from the kid but didn’t give it to Becca right away.
She grabbed for it, but I held it away from her. “First, you’re going to do something for me.”
“What?”
“You need to experience the Festival food first. Eat a funnel cake and cotton candy.”
“Both?” She sounded excited at the prospect.
“Yes. Then you get your bear.”
“Okay, I like sweets. Which one is first?”
“I guess the cocoa and biscotti obsession should have been a dead giveaway about your sweet tooth.”
“You’d think.” She took my hand and led me over to the food booths.
She stopped short. “Change of plans. Forget the funnel cake.”
I followed her gaze. She’d noticed Gail’s stand. “All right. I agree. What should we get?”
“Pecan pie. Definitely Gail’s pecan pie.”
We waited as a couple in front of us ordered, and then it was our turn. “Hi Gail!” Becca said excitedly.
“Hi, you two. Are you enjoying your first Clayton Falls Fest?”
“Definitely, but it would be even better with a slice of your pecan pie.” Becca’s eyes were already glued on the display behind Gail.
“Absolutely. You really do love this pie, don’t you?”
“I wish I’d known the extent of your sweet tooth,” I teased.
“Then you’d have tried to stuff me full, and I can’t resist.”
“And that would be bad because…”
“You eat everything without gaining a pound. You wouldn’t get it.”
“Like you have to worry about—”
“Gavin, a word of advice?” Gail handed over Becca’s piece of pie.
“Sure, Gail.”
“You are never going to win an argument with a woman about weight, so let it go.”
“All right. I’ll take your word for it.”
“Here’s your pie, hon. Don’t let him get to you. I just have to say, you two make such a nice couple.”
I smiled. Gail’s compliments were always genuine. “Thanks.”
Chapter Twenty-Four
Becca
Still enjoying the lingering taste of pecan pie, I picked at the blue cotton candy Gavin had bought us. We walked down the beach holding hands and watching the stars. I was pretty sure there was nothing as beautiful as a star filled sky on a beach.
“Having a good time?” Gavin asked.
“Definitely.” I swung our arms a little, holding back the urge to skip. I honestly couldn’t remember the last time I’d had so much fun.
“I love seeing you like this.”
“Like what?”
“Like this.” He twirled me around, and we danced to the distant music.
“I like feeling like this.” I lay down on the sand, loving the light breeze.
He dropped down next to me. “You have the most beautiful smile in the world.”
Gavin leaned on his elbow, watching me.
I reached over and ran a hand down his arm. “I love your smile too.”
He moved closer, brushing his lips against mine.
“If you could be anywhere in the world right now, where would you be?” I asked.
He played with a strand of my hair. “Here.”
“Be serious.”
“I am. I like where I’m at.”
“Me too.”
He smiled, taking my hand in his much larger one. There was something so comforting about the feel of his strong hand around mine. “I love you, Becca.”
My heart fluttered when I heard the words, and without even consciously thinking about it, I replied. “I love you too.”
His lips returned to mine, but it was more than a brush this time. He pulled me closer, cradling my head in his hand. He deepened the kiss, and if it hadn’t been for the sound of the waves lapping at the shore and the distant laughter of fair-goers, I could have forgotten where we were.
We eventually separated and just stared at the stars. “Do you want to go home, or should we go back to the fair?”
“Home sounds good, but I told Molly we’d meet up. Besides, you did promise me a Ferris Wheel ride.”
“I did, didn’t I?”
Gavin stood and gave me a hand to help me up. “Shall we?”
He linked his arm with mine, and we walked back toward the fair.
“There you are!” Kelly yelled as I waved at her across the crowd. “I’ve been looking for you.”
“Hey.”
She pulled me into a hug as soon as I reached her.
“What’s going on?”
“Not too much, but you missed the crowning of Miss Clayton Falls. Molly finally handed over her tiara.” Kelly ran a hand through her brown hair, trying to smooth out the damage caused by the wind.
“Wait, so she was the last one?” Watching Kelly fix her hair made me suddenly self-conscious of my own. I resisted the urge to pull it back. Gavin seemed to like when I wore it down.
“Yeah. Weird, I know. Where are you guys headed?”
“I was looking for Molly, and then we might head over to the rides.” I searched the crowds again, hoping to catch a glance of Molly.
Kelly nodded toward the rides. “Molly’s over there now. We’ll join you.”
I looked over my shoulder and noticed Gavin talking with Tom. Kelly walked over and grabbed Tom’s hand, pulling him along. Gavin took my hand. Kelly texted Molly, and she met us over by the Ferris Wheel. Ben and Jake were with her. “I got us all tickets.” Molly, dressed like she always was in a jean skirt, beamed. I wasn’t sure if it was a pregnancy glow or just because she was happy, but she looked amazing.
I couldn’t picture a more perfect end to the evening. Sitting with Gavin, watching the stars and moon reflect out over the water fifty feet in the air was pretty incredible. As rickety as the ride seemed, I didn’t mind at all. Gavin put an arm around me, and I leaned into him, inhaling his smell—a mix of aftershave and something else I could never figure out.
We barely talked, just enjoying each other. I loved that we could do that. There was never any pressure to come up with anything to say.
“That was fun, huh?” Kelly asked as soon as we got out of our car.
“Definitely, but I’m exhausted. I think I’m ready to head home.” I stole a glance at Gavin.
Gavin squeezed my hand. “Sounds good to me.”
Kelly gave me a knowing look, telling me she knew exactly what I was hinting at. “All right, but we need to get together soon. How about we do a girls’ night when they play poker next week?”
I thought about it for a second, but I already knew my answer. “Sure, that sounds great.”
Molly agreed. “I’m in. Ben can keep himself busy.”
“He should join us,” Tom suggested.
“You want me to join your poker night?”
“Yeah, and, Jake, you can come too.”
Gavin eyed Tom skeptically. I bit my lip to stop myself from laughing. Gavin was not a big fan of the Mathews brothers.
“Sure, why not?” Jake answered quickly.
I would have paid to see that game, but a girls’ night with Molly and Kelly sounded pretty good too.
“What are we going to do? Please tell me it won’t involve Gill’s.” I still hadn’t warmed up to the local bar.
Kelly laughed. “No Gill’s, I promise. We’ll think of something good.”
“Cool.” We said our goodbyes and headed back down the beach to Gavin’s place. I liked that he didn’t even have to ask me if I wanted to come.
***
Girls’ night out turned out to be girls’ night in. Kelly blended margaritas, making some virgin ones for Molly at the same time.
“You didn’t have to bother making me my own. I could have just had water,” Molly said when Kelly handed her a glass.
�
�What would be the fun in that? At least you can feel like you’re having a margarita. Besides, we all know it’s the cute glass with the salt that makes it, not the tequila.” Kelly took a sip from her drink.
“We do?” Molly arched an eyebrow.
“Yes. And these glasses are cute, aren’t they?” Kelly held hers up.
“Very cute,” I jumped in. The glasses were pretty cute, with a cool dramatic swirl design on them. “I love the color—it’s a cool shade of green.”
“Kelly having something green? Shocking.” Molly teased. I looked around Kelly’s kitchen. Green accents were everywhere.
We took our drinks outside with a bowl of chips and salsa. It was hot out, but I was really starting to get used to the heat.
“I’m still trying to adjust to how quiet it is here.” I took a sip of my margarita, enjoying the tartness and the kick.
“It’s different from the city, that’s for sure.” Molly slipped off her flip flops and put her feet up on an empty chair.
“Just make yourself at home, why don’t you?” Kelly nudged Molly’s arm.
“Oh come on, I’m pregnant. That should count for something.”
“You’re not pregnant enough to complain about sore feet, that’s for sure.” Kelly sounded a little short, and I might have been reading way too much into it, but I wondered if there was a note of jealousy.
“Okay…” Molly sat up.
I didn’t like the tension and did the first thing I could think of to ease it. “Don’t you guys want to grill me about Gavin? That’s usually your favorite activity, right?”
Kelly relaxed her shoulders. “I was just thinking about that. Anything you feel like sharing?”
“It’s usually your job to pull it out of me. You’re pretty good at that.”
Molly took a few sips of her drink. “Have you guys talked at all about what you want to do at the end of the summer?”
“Molly, seriously? Do you want to shut her up before she starts?” Kelly shook her head like she was annoyed, but I could tell she was holding back a smile.
“I’m just asking. You guys seemed so close the other night at the festival. I kind of wondered if you’d been talking about making things more serious or something.”
“We usually avoid that topic of conversation. I honestly don’t know what I want, let alone what he’s thinking.” I shifted in my chair.
“Isn’t it pretty simple? I mean, you have to finish school, so you’ll have to do long distance for what, nine or ten months?” Kelly asked.
“We don’t have to do long distance if we’re not together…”
“Oh come on, Becca. I see the way you look at each other. You can’t really think it’s just a fling,” Molly said gently.
“He told me he loved me.” I couldn’t contain a smile.
“Ahh, really?” Both Molly and Kelly nearly jumped out of their chairs.
“What did you say back?” Molly asked.
“I told him I loved him too.”
“And you’re questioning the long distance thing…” Kelly trailed off.
“I don’t know. This is all so new to me, you know?”
“Yeah, new, but awesome, right?” Molly took another sip of her drink.
“Awesome is a good word for it.”
I stayed over for a few more hours until the guys showed up. I followed Gavin home, anxious to curl up in bed with him. Just talking about the end of the summer upset me, and I needed to lose myself in his touch.
Chapter Twenty-Five
Becca
Gavin and I had fallen into a routine. We saw each other most nights, but Thursdays were always set: take-out and a movie. It was such a nice way to ease into the weekend.
Gavin had to work late one Thursday in July, so I offered to go over and walk Max. I definitely loved having a dog around. I was going to have to get one when I got back to Boston. Max jumped up and down when I walked in and grabbed his leash. Gavin had given me a key so I could get in, but I tried not to read too much into it.
It was seven, but the sun still shone. I snapped on Max’s leash, and we headed down to the beach. It was fairly empty at that hour, but I saw a couple of teens still hanging out. I walked down to the water’s edge, slipping off my sandals, and rolling up my jeans. Molly laughed at me for wearing jeans in ninety-five degree weather, but it’s what I was most comfortable in.
The warm water felt great on my feet, and Max loped happily beside me. I loved the way the sun reflected off the swells. The ocean was calm, but the gentle lapping of the waves was loud enough to create a relaxing sort of mood.
I’d miss my walks on the beach when I went back to Boston. I was going to miss a lot about Clayton Falls. I’d miss the peacefulness, the quiet. Parts of it were boring, but I loved that I wasn’t scared to go for a walk on my own. Of course, I knew what I’d miss the most—Gavin.
We reached the end of the beach and turned back around. I stopped for a second to pull my hair up into a bun. Even with the sun setting, it was still hot. I looked forward to getting back into Gavin’s nearly arctic apartment. I wasn’t quite sure how he paid his cooling bill, but sometimes his insistence on blaring the AC was a good thing.
I got back to Gavin’s and let Max off the leash. He collapsed on his pillow by the window. I picked up my purse from where I left it on the island counter top and pulled out my phone, noticing a missed call from a Boston number I didn’t recognize.
I dialed into voicemail, hoping it was about my loans.
“Hi, Becca. It’s Dad. I looked up your number because I really want to talk to you. I know you said you weren’t interested in my help, but I’d love if you’d let me get to know you. I am your father after all.”
I hung up, not wanting to listen to the rest of the message. Who was he to come crawling into my life all of a sudden? There had been so many times over the past years when I’d daydreamed about him coming back, when I’d imagined him actually caring, but I wasn’t that same daydreaming little girl anymore. He hadn’t been there when I needed him, so I didn’t need him. Period. If Mom had taught me anything, it was to question a person’s motives. People didn’t do anything out of the goodness of their hearts. He had to have an ulterior motive.
I was curled on the couch watching the waves through the window when Gavin got home.
“Hey, baby.” He kissed me on the forehead. “Just give me a second to change, and I’ll be out.”
Gavin always seemed so different in uniform. He looked good, but somehow it didn’t fit, like he didn’t really feel comfortable wearing it. He always changed the first chance he got.
“Okay.” I forced a smile. I couldn’t stop thinking about my dad. I hated that he thought I was just going to do what he wanted.
Gavin came back out a minute or so later in shorts and a long sleeved t-shirt. He dressed for the interior temperature. “I can’t tell you how nice it is to come home and find you here.”
“You knew I’d be here.”
“Exactly. It made my whole day better knowing I’d find you waiting.” He sat down next to me.
“How’d he behave?” He pointed to Max.
“Max was perfect.” The dog picked up his head when he heard his name.
“Good. I figured he would be. He’s crazy about you.”
“Yeah, the feeling’s mutual.”
“Well, I’m crazy about you too.”
I smiled.
“Aren’t you going to tell me the feeling’s mutual?”
“Who says it is?” I wanted to keep things light. I didn’t want to let my anger at my Dad ruin our night, but it was easier said than done. What I needed was to burn off energy. I needed to go home and swim.
“Oh it is.” He pushed me down on the couch, following after so he hovered above me. “You know it is.”
“Gavin, don’t. I have to go.” The more I thought about it, the better swimming some laps sounded. “But I’ll be back later.”
“Nuh uh, I just got home. You’re not
going anywhere.” His lips went to my ear and down my neck. It felt good, but I needed to leave. There was no way I was going to make it all night holding in the anger.
I tried to turn my neck away from him, but he just turned it toward him again. “I’ve been waiting all day for you.”
“I have to go.”
“No, you don’t. I’m not done with you.” Those words—I hadn’t heard them in so long but it all came back to me. I hadn’t had a flashback in years. Images flooded my mind, like a terrifying movie.
I pushed against him. “Let me go.” The tears started to flood my face.
He moved off me, letting me sit up. “Becca? What’s going on?”
I pulled down my shirt from where it was riding up and walked to find my shoes. I felt his arms come around me from behind. “Becca, did I do something? Did that upset you? I was just playing around.”
I turned to look at him, well aware that my face was a swollen mess of tears.
“It’s not your fault, but I have to go.”
“No. You need to tell me what’s going on. I’m not letting you leave until we talk this out.”
“Who are you to stop me?” I challenged.
“Your boyfriend.”
Hearing those words and the conviction he used when he said them stopped me in my tracks. He deserved the truth even if I didn’t want to share it.
“I don’t want to ruin this.” I gestured at the space between us.
“Ruin what?” He took my hand and led me back to the couch, where I crumpled into a ball in his arms. I felt so safe there, like nothing in the world could ever hurt me again.
“Us.”
“Nothing’s going to ruin us. You can tell me anything.” His kind eyes pleaded with me.
“It’s going to change things.” The thought made my stomach churn. I wanted everything to stay exactly the way it was—perfect.
“I doubt it, but if you’re right, then so be it. I need to know what’s wrong.”
I took a deep breath and let it out slowly. “I wasn’t actually a virgin.” I was too afraid to even look up at him.
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