by Brinda Berry
“I saw you spent every day for a week with Melanie. That hot tub show must’ve been tough to film.” Aiden stands at the end of the weight bench, towering over me in my reclining position. He’s my personal trainer at the gym.
I roll my eyes at his sarcasm. “Yeah. It’s a real turn-on to sit next to a half-naked woman with a camera crew audience hanging over my head.”
“She seems like a lot of fun.” He adds more weight to my bar.
“She’s nice.” I wish he’d talk about anything else.
“Tomorrow you film the finale, right? Isn’t this show supposed to end in a proposal?”
“Nope. Not for me, it doesn’t. I’m leaving with cash.”
“Heard from Kiley?” Aiden spots me as I pull the bar from its racked position.
“Nope,” I say through a grunt and perform the repetition of the bar with more weight than normal.
“Easy, there. Last one.” Aiden steps up, ready to grab the weight if I’ve overdone it. He watches me a little too closely.
“Quit waiting for me to talk. I don’t need a counseling session.” I blow out air and lift the weight back to the rack.
“I didn’t say a word.”
“You don’t have to.” I curl up and swing my leg over the bench.
“But if you want to, I’m here for you.”
“We’re not a couple of chicks.”
“For all the women in the world, I take offense to that statement.” He marks my reps on his clipboard.
“I thought I’d get away from the third degree by coming here. Dane’s already drilled me. Leo’s sister Josie tried to kick my ass. Then Leo’s girlfriend gives me a piece of her mind and I don’t really even know her. Actually, every woman I pass gives me a dirty look.”
“Isn’t that normal for you?” He chuckles and looks up from the clipboard. “I’ll open up for you after hours if any of the ladies here are giving little Gunny a hard time.”
“Fuck off.”
He grins and signals for me to follow. “Pull ups. Let’s make it twenty-five.”
“You trying to kill me?”
“No. Trying to make you shut up and stop feeling sorry for yourself.”
I grab the bar and pull up to my chin. “So what would you do?”
“Man. You’re still talking. I thought you didn’t want to talk about it.”
I roll my eyes and let my body down. Then I pull up to the bar. “You don’t know what you’d do, do you?”
“Do you want to date other women?”
I didn’t want him to turn the questions back to me. “Not really.”
Hell no.
“Do you want to see her date someone else?” He raises an eyebrow.
“No, what kind of question is that? You know the answer.” I puff and pull up. Then reverse to the ground.
“Do you want to see her fall in love and have some babies with somebody like me?” He makes eye contact with a curvy redhead who passes us.
I grind my teeth at his comment but don’t respond to his jab. It’s obvious that he’s trying to piss me off.
He rubs his jaw and grins at me. “She’s a beautiful woman. It’s only a matter of time. Maybe I should throw my hat in the ring.”
The muscles in my neck tighten and I mash my lips together. One thing we don’t do—date each other’s exes. Dane, Leo, Aiden, and I know it’s an unspoken rule.
Hands off.
“There’s a reason I should hang out with Leo more. You and Dane both think you’re God’s gift to women.” I pull up and hang there for a minute, enjoying the burn in my biceps.
“All I’m saying is be sure about what you’re throwing away. You’ve been in love with that girl since we were kids.”
“Whoa. Nobody said anything about me being in love.” I drop to my feet. “She’s unpredictable. She broke off with her fiancé weeks before their wedding. She ditched me after Veronica’s wedding so she could be with the show’s producer.”
“And does she realize how you feel about her? I figure this show thing has to be messing with her head. I feel really bad for her.”
“Well, don’t. She and I had some fun. The show ends soon. Life will go back to normal.”
He nods. “I get it. You’re being careful. Maybe she’s not the right one.”
“You sound like her with all this ‘right one’ business.” I grab the gym towel and wipe my neck. “I need to cut it short tonight. I’ll see you later.”
Aiden shakes his head. “Whatever. Take care.”
I grab my gym towel and stalk out of the gym. Halfway to my Jeep, I spot a note tucked underneath the windshield wiper blade. I break into a run.
Unfolding it carefully, I curse at my expectations. Kiley has made it more than clear she doesn’t want to see me. I slam my fist against the Jeep’s door, leaving a shallow dent.
The note from Melanie says she looks forward to the show finale tonight. We’ll be on location in the studio. She’s been a good friend to me, but she knows where I stand.
Melanie and I have an easy friendship. I could sleep with her. Hell, I could probably marry the woman and be content.
Content.
Life should be full of surprises, not planned out with a script.
I ball up the note and toss it into the backseat of the Jeep.
* * *
At the studio, I sit backstage. A studio audience waits for the taping to begin and I’m supposed to go out after all the women from the dates talk about me.
Half an hour passes. I watch a small screen showing all the women in interviews—even the ones from the speed dating rounds. The audience laughs along with the women who talk about me.
A man I don’t recognize questions each of the ladies. “Where’s Kiley?” I whisper to the woman who applies powder to my nose.
“They replaced her for the finale. Didn’t you know that Bob Targis will be hosting?” She dabs the sponge on my forehead.
“They can’t replace her. She’s the Matchmaker.” I hold up a hand and block the makeup sponge. “Where’s Tony Tolino? I need to talk to him.”
“You go on in a few minutes. You’ll have to wait.”
“You’re on in five,” a guy wearing a headset says and holds up his fingers.
I glance at the screen in front of me. The camera pans the audience and Ed Vanderbilt sits in the front row. I get up from my seat and look around for Tony. He’d been by to say hello a few minutes earlier.
He stands in the wings with the nearby studio lights glowing on his face. His pensive expression does nothing to alleviate my worries about Kiley. I stalk to him, my temper rising because someone should be telling me what the hell is going on.
The guy with the headset holds up four fingers.
“Why isn’t Kiley here?”
“Shh,” he answers.
“Where is she?”
He draws me down a hallway by the arm. “She couldn’t be here today.”
“Why not?”
“She thought it best if you didn’t share a stage.”
I shake my head. “Does she hate me that much?”
Tony frowns at me. “No. She’s protecting you.”
“From what?” I’m livid, my hands balling into fists because he’s not giving me the information I need.
“You have to get out there,” he says and points to the stage. “Go.”
“Not without Kiley.”
“You’ll forfeit the prize money. If you don’t fulfill the contract, you lose the million. Think about it.”
I grab him by the collar. “Tell me where she is.”
Tony exhales and pulls my hand off his shirt, smoothing down the wrinkles I’ve created. “I don’t know. Honest to God.”
The guy with the headset rushes to me and holds up two fingers, then points to the entrance of the stage.
I shake my head at him. “Who does know?”
“Ask Ed after the show. He agreed to pull Kiley off.”
I back away from Tony and run to the s
tage. The bright lights blind me momentarily as I walk out with a forced smile. I wave at the women, all seated around a U-shaped sofa with my chair at the open end.
The audience chuckles.
Bob, the replacement host, walks forward and sits in the chair beside me. “It’s good to see you, Gunner,” he says as if we’re old friends.
“Nice to meet you,” I say and hold out my hand to shake. “I’d expected Kiley Vanderbilt.”
He looks awkward for a split second. We haven’t rehearsed the windup since they wanted genuine reactions.
They should’ve warned me if they didn’t expect me to balk.
The replacement host folds his hands in his lap. “There was a last minute obligation she had to fulfill, or she wouldn’t miss it. So, here we are. I guess you’ve been watching backstage and have heard some of the stories from these lovely ladies.”
I nod.
He continues. “You’ve spent the most time with Melanie.”
For the first time, I notice she sits on my left at the end of the nearest sofa. “Hi Melanie,” I say.
“Hi Gunner.” She gives me a warm smile and rises to give me a hug.
I glance around at the rest of the women: all the speed dates—including the mime-girl who sits silent with a residual pissed-off expression. There are several women I saw for only one night. Addison from the camping trip and Melanie sit nearest me.
“What is it about Melanie that drew you to see her again and again?” Bob the Host asks.
“We have a lot in common. Fishing, hunting, the outdoors.”
Bob nods.
“Kiley matched me with someone who makes a lot of sense for a guy like me. Melanie has it all—beauty, brains, a four-wheel-drive.”
The audience laughs and so does Bob. Melanie smiles at me.
“Kiley certainly knows me well. Hell… Sorry, I’m probably not supposed to curse on television. Melanie is exactly the type of girl I’d choose to date.”
More laughter from the audience.
At the side of the stage, Tony grins as if he wrote a script for me himself.
Bob stands. “Before you continue, let’s bring out another guest. We’ll come back to Melanie.”
When I see the girl in the wings, I decide I hate live television. With a passion. I’m never watching anything but football, ever again.
Why is Veronica here? She’s not part of this process.
She walks onto the stage with a grin and a wink before sitting on a sofa opposite Melanie and Addison.
“Welcome,” Bob says. “I know Gunner’s surprised to see you.”
“Probably. I’m glad to be here and give my two cents about what Gun needs in his life.” Veronica straightens her long skirt. “He took time off from the show to help me get married and I wanted to be here for him.”
She beams at me, no longer the scarred girl from so long ago. A happily married woman.
She didn’t let her past dictate her beliefs. Her goals for a healthy relationship.
Bob leans in, folds his hands over one knee, and adopts an intimate tone. “Congratulations on your recent marriage, Veronica. We can’t wait to see if Gunner chooses love or money today. Before we find out, all of America wants to know the real Gunner. The man he doesn’t show to the camera.”
“He’s a private kind of guy, so I’m risking a lot by telling you this.” Veronica’s directs a sad smile toward the studio audience. She doesn’t look at me immediately, and when her gaze flicks to mine, blood freezes in my veins. I know I won’t like whatever she says.
“Tell us,” Bob says. He prods her with a nod.
“Gunner, Gunner.” She says my name and shakes her head. “You put up this wall against people. But I know you love hard and true. I never doubted for one minute that you’d protect me from all the bad things in the world. And even though you never said how you felt, I knew. I felt this incredible love. I felt it every time you worked overtime at the store to put food on our table. I knew it when you helped me with algebra when I vowed to quit school over math.”
I look away from her to the audience, mostly women, who all grin. Heat flushes up my neck and into my face.
“I couldn’t ask for a better brother,” Veronica says. “But you’re also dense as concrete when it comes to picking out a match for yourself.”
The audience laughs.
She continues. “You and Melanie have zero chemistry. So what if you like to fish and shoot guns with her? Are you looking for a pal or the love of your life? Do you want to touch her right now? Do you want to tell her when something good happens to you? Do you want to make sure she’s happy, because it makes you happy?”
Bob holds up a hand. “Let’s give Gunner a chance to answer.”
He looks to me and I exhale, attempting to relax so I can answer the damned question. I should get paid triple wages for this inquisition.
“So many questions. I’m not sure where to begin.” I say. “Melanie’s easy to be with. I care about her.” I know I’m not choosing Melanie at the end of today’s show, but I don’t want to embarrass her, either. She’s been a trooper—hanging out with me so I can get through the rest of the season.
Veronica’s brow crinkles in disbelief. She’s planning to scold me on national television.
Bob motions off stage to someone. “Let’s bring on one more guest.”
I turn slowly, daring to hope. It has to be Kiley. She’s the only one from this show who hasn’t been on stage. I need to see her, touch her.
Ed strolls out and takes the seat beside Veronica.
Disappointment cuts through me.
Bob sits in the chair and says something to Ed. It’s all background noise in my head as I glance back to the stage entrance again. I’d been so sure she would walk out.
My gut clenches. Something is wrong. Maybe all my worst fears will culminate in this moment and I won’t see her ever again. “Can someone please tell me where Kiley is?”
Ed turns to face the camera instead of me or Bob. “I’m the producer of Forever. It’s been a good long run of this fantastic show in its eighth season. But this is the end. It’s not because I don’t believe in it, but because I think it’s time. And because I don’t want it to end on a sour note, I’d like to clear the air.”
The women on the sofa all look to one another. Veronica keeps her gaze on me. Bob doesn’t look surprised at all.
“I allowed my daughter to serve as Matchmaker this season because she’s good at it, not because she’s my daughter, although she’s wonderful in that role as well. She asked that I pull her from the show because she didn’t want to compromise the production’s integrity. It seems she’s become involved emotionally.”
Bob signals to the wall behind my back. “Our Matchmaker, Kiley Vanderbilt, and Gunner have known each other since they were young.”
I turn in my seat to face a giant projection screen filling the entire wall. A class photo of little kids appears on-screen. It’s a photo I don’t recognize. A drawn heart appears around a little boy. It’s me. Me, back when I didn’t worry about anything but playing outside with my friends.
When I had a whole family and a carefree life.
Next to me, another heart pops up framing the face of a dark-haired beauty.
Wow. Even at second or third grade, Kiley was beautiful. Her huge smile and shining eyes glow so brightly, it draws the eye.
Another photo of Kiley on stage in a school play. She’s the Statue of Liberty. The girl didn’t need a torch to look regal.
I can’t stop smiling. She’s always been so vibrant. No wonder the kids at school gravitated to her. She’s like the sun. Always has been.
“Let’s take a look at some footage that made headlines.”
A montage of images from the camping trip flicker in boxes. Kiley smiling at me. Me watching her.
Kiley’s face as she focuses on my every move while we hike. When did that camera guy film this? My shoulder muscles bunch.
Ed motions to the s
creen and doesn’t seem phased by what he’s about to reveal. “We had to mount a special action camera to get some of this. Then a night camera. No one but Roy even knew about the extra cameras. Cameras tend to make people uncomfortable and we wanted genuine moments. The real deal. At first, we hadn’t planned to use any footage.”
Ed folds his arms over his chest and sits back like he’s going to watch some home movies.
Hell, this guy is going to show real moments all right. Moments between me and Kiley. Things she’ll hate being televised. How could he do this to his daughter?
Then her face fills the screen. Her wet hair sticking to her high cheekbones. Man, she’s beautiful. My lungs stop functioning.
We’re inside the tent talking about my mom. I’m not embarrassed about the emotional timbre to my voice. I’m never ashamed of loving Mom. I focus on what we’re saying.
Kiley: “She’d be proud of the man you are.”
Me: “She would sometimes. Right now she’d whip my ass.”
Kiley: “Why is that?”
Me: “She’d want me to be more honorable than I am.”
Kiley: “Honorable how?”
Me: “I’m trying to think of a way to tell you I pissed Addison off on purpose so she’d leave.”
There’s the sound of Kiley smacking my arm.
Kiley: “You’re kidding. Right? Tell me you didn’t do that. I can’t believe you admitted it.”
Me: “On the other hand, maybe Mom’s looking down on me and is proud of my ingenuity.”
The film grows dark and our heads pulls together. It’s tough to tell what’s going on from the angle, but I know.
Me: “Maybe she’d want me to do whatever makes me happy.”
My pulse ratchets and blood rushes into my ears. I’m always happy with Kiley. Deliriously happy.
Fear sinks deep into my soul, so leaden I can’t move for a moment. Can’t breathe.
I shake it off.
“Ed, I—” I get to my feet.
He continues like I haven’t said a word, like he hasn’t been watching me make out with his daughter. “And I’m so very proud of her moral compass, her spirit, and her belief in love. It’s a hard world out there and hard to find the right one,” he says. “She knows love isn’t measured in time. People sometimes simply know when it’s right.”