by P. C. Cast
“Anyway,” Zo started again. “What they want me to tell you is that I’m the reason we defeated Neferet. It’s not that I did it on my own, but like Nyx said when I was Marked,” then she quoted almost exactly what Nyx had said to him, too, when he’d made the Change. “My power is in the uniqueness of my combined blood of ancient Wise Women and Elders, as well as insight and understanding of the modern world. She said that I would be her eyes and ears in a world that is struggling to find the balance between good and evil. Then she said,” Zo pointed at the words tattooed around his bicep, “Darkness does not always equate to evil, just as light does not always bring good.”
“The same thing happened to you.” A terrible sense of foreboding caused the hairs on his forearms to lift.
“Kevin, do you have an affinity for any of the elements?” Zo asked abruptly.
“I dunno.”
“When you’re circling for, say, a Full Moon Ritual, and the elements are called, have you ever felt anything?” Damien said.
“I have no idea.”
“What do you mean, you have no idea?” Zo asked him.
“I’ve never taken part in a ritual. Or a circle.”
Except for Jack, the entire table gaped at him.
“What in the hell are you talking about?” Aphrodite said.
“Red fledglings and red vampyres don’t take part in rituals. We don’t circle. We’re not even allowed in Nyx’s Temple,” Jack explained.
“Oh, my Goddess, is that true?” Zo sounded like she might hyperventilate.
“Well, yeah. I tried to sneak into Nyx’s Temple once, but I got caught.” Kev paused to shake off the memory of that terrible beating. “I never tried that again. That’s why I was sure my dreams of Nyx were just delusions—my brain dying or something.”
“It’s an abomination,” Damien said.
“We need to fix that. Now.” Aphrodite stood. “Let’s take him to the temple. If he has what you have, Z, we’ll know he really is you in his world.”
“And if not?” Kevin asked.
“If not, you’re just a cute red vampyre whose sister is boss of us,” Stevie Rae said.
“I am not the boss of you,” Zo said.
“I’ll remind you that you said that next time you order me around,” Aphrodite said.
“Children, stop bickering. Let us go to Nyx’s Temple,” said G-ma.
“Hang on, we need Shaylin,” Zo said.
“She was with Nicole in the barn last time I saw her,” Shaunee said. “She said she needed some barn therapy after dealing with the super-upset red fledglings. I’ll get her and meet you guys in the temple.”
Everyone started to file out of the dining hall, and Kevin snagged Zo’s sleeve, holding her back for a second. “Hey, what if I do have what you have. What does it mean?”
Zoey’s eyes were sad when they met his. “It means you’re what I am—a leader, a rallying point, the person who brings people together—and when we do that, we defeat Darkness.”
“Ah, hell,” he said.
“Yep. I couldn’t have said it better myself.”
Other Kevin
The snow had changed from giant flakes to steady, tiny specks of white that caught the gaslights along the path to the temple and turned into starlight. Zoey’s friends were talking easily together. They even waved to fledglings who called their names.
Zoey walked beside him, uncharacteristically silent.
G-ma Redbird was on his other side. She was silent too, and holding his hand.
“Do not be nervous, u-we-tsi.” She spoke softly, for his ears alone. “The goddess already knows you.”
“How can you be sure? Maybe they were just dreams, or delusions, or maybe some weird psychic echo across worlds of what was supposed to happen to Zoey.”
“I can be sure because I know Nyx,” G-ma said cryptically.
And then they were entering Nyx’s Temple and Kevin forgot his nerves. He forgot his fears. He forgot everything except the wonder of Nyx.
The moment he entered the temple he was engulfed in the scent of vanilla and lavender. He heard the tinkling of running water and glanced to his right as they passed a beautiful fountain made of amethyst with candles floating in it. There were several ways they could have gone, but the group didn’t hesitate. They turned to the left, walked through a thick, arched stone doorway, and entered a large room that was lit by white candles suspended everywhere. Sconces with live flames protruded from the walls. In the very center of the room was the only piece of furniture—an antique wooden table, ornately carved, that held another candelabrum, plus a luminous statue of the Goddess made of iridescent, golden onyx that was lit from within. Her arms were raised and she was cupping a crescent moon between her hands. Several thick sticks of sweetgrass incense smoked at her feet. In front of the table there was an open flame that burned from a recess in the stone floor. He thought it looked like it could burn for a century and never falter, never fade, never extinguish.
“Z, I’ll get the candles,” Stevie Rae called, disappearing into a side room.
“Found her!” Shaunee entered the room with a pretty, petite girl beside her. He blinked, surprised to see yet another female red vampyre. This one had an adult tattoo that looked like that famous Japanese wave, but with layers upon layers of detail. “Kevin, this is Shaylin. Her element is—”
“Water,” Shaylin said. She stared at him, and as she did her eyes seemed to get bigger and bigger. “He has the exact same aura as you, Z.”
“Huh?” Kevin was even more confused than he had been before he’d entered the temple. “Aura?”
“She’s a Prophetess of Nyx. She sees auras,” Shaunee explained.
“Really? And mine’s like Zo’s?” Kevin said. “What’s it look like?”
Shaylin grinned. “Pretty. You both have violet auras with flecks of silver, like liquid mercury, sparkling all over.”
“Do people usually have the same auras?” Zo asked.
“Nope,” Shaylin said.
“What about siblings? Other Kevin’s my brother.”
“My answer is still nope. I’ve never seen anyone before with the same aura.”
“Well, that’s weird,” Kevin and Zoey said together.
“Jinx!” Kevin yelled. “Beat ya!”
She shoved his shoulder. “Come on. You’re with me.” Then she gestured at the others. “Okay, circle up.”
It only took a moment. Everyone knew exactly what to do. Well, everyone except Kevin, who stood next to Zoey, watching everything while he cracked his knuckles. When all were in place, Zoey turned to him. They were standing in the middle of the circle between the table and the open fire.
“Hey, stop looking so nervous. This is easy and fun. Just walk with me. Damien, Shaunee, Shaylin, Stevie Rae, and I will do everything. All you need to do is to concentrate on what you’re feeling, and if you feel something—tell me. Ready?”
“Yep,” he lied.
She picked up a long, wooden match and a box to strike it against. Then she walked to Damien, who was holding a yellow candle.
“From the east I summon air—the element that fills us at birth and surrounds us all the days of our lives.” She touched the match to the yellow candle.
Kevin felt his hair flutter and heard the sound of wind sighing through leaves. He looked around, trying to see if he’d missed something. Was a window open?
Zoey and Damien were staring at him.
“Anything?” she asked.
“I—I felt wind in my hair and heard leaves rustling.”
Damien grinned. “That’s one.”
“Seriously? I really have an affinity for wind?”
“Absolutely,” said Zo.
“Wow. Just wow, wow, wow!” Kevin said.
“Come on. Let’s see what else you have.”
Everyone turned to their right while he and Zoey approached Shaunee, who was holding a red candle.
“From the south I summon fire—that element that warms us and gives us light.” She didn’t have to touch the match to the red candle. It spontaneously lit and Kevin jumped. He was surrounded by heat, as if he was standing a little too close to a bonfire. A light sweat broke out on his face, and he automatically wiped at his forehead.
“My guess is that’s two,” Shaunee said.
Zo raised her brows at him.
He nodded, unable to stop his gleeful grin. “Definitely felt that. It’s awesome!”
They turned to their right and walked to Shaylin, who was holding a blue candle.
“From the west I summon water—the element that washes us and quenches us.” She lit the blue candle.
The sound of waves filled Kevin’s ears, and the scent of the sea filled his nose.
“I hear it! I smell it!”
“That’s three,” Shaylin said.
They turned to the right again and ended up in front of Stevie Rae and her green candle.
“Hey there Z and Z’s bro,” she said, smiling at them both.
Kevin thought he automatically liked this girl, and decided right then he wanted to get to know her better.
“From the north I summon earth—we come from you, and return to you.” She lit the green candle.
Kevin could feel the softness of a grassy meadow under his feet. He smelled hay and heard birdsong.
“That’s four. Right, Kev?”
“Right!” Kevin told the little blond.
“Now for the fifth.” Zo led him back to the table and the fat purple candle that rested there. “Last, I summon spirit to our circle—it is our connection to each other and to our Goddess.” Zo lit the purple candle.
Unbelievably, Kevin felt his own spirit leap, like there were birds fluttering around inside his chest. He gazed down at Zoey, surprised to see her eyes filled with tears.
“You feel it, don’t you?”
“Yes. I feel it.” Then something caught his eye and Kevin’s gaze went to the circle itself. All around it was a glowing silver thread, like a ribbon of mercury. “Holy crap! Can you guys see that?”
He heard soft laughter from everyone. They were smiling at him and nodding their heads. G-ma was clapping her hands. Zoey was the only one who looked sad.
“While our circle is open I want to do something,” Zo said. Her eyes traveled the circumference, meeting the gaze of each of her friends. “Help me, okay?”
All four nodded.
Zoey turned to her brother. “Bend down so that I can put my hand on your head.”
Kevin did one better. He knelt before his sister, and as he did so he felt the rightness of it. She rested her hand gently on his head, and when she began to speak, her voice was completely changed—filled with otherworldly power and the strength of a goddess.
For my brother I ask a blessing from elements five
Air, fire, water, earth, spirit
No matter where he might go—what hardships he
might know
Follow him. Strengthen him. If his heart is empty—fill it.
Keep him happy, safe, and alive.
I ask of our Goddess Nyx from above
To hold him close, wrapped in love … always love.
“So she has spoken—so mote it be,” intoned her friends.
Instantly, Kevin was bathed in such a sense of compassion—of endless, unconditional love—that he knew beyond any doubt Nyx was his goddess, too.
Zo smiled through her tears at him. “How about you close our circle?”
He had to wipe his eyes and clear his throat before he could answer her. “I don’t know how, Zo.”
“It’s easy. Just go backwards—that always closes a circle, ends a ritual or spell. Start here. Release the element and blow out the candle.”
“Um, spirit. Thank you for coming. And you can go now.” He felt awkward, but he blew out the candle and felt the release of a little spark within him that he knew was spirit.
Grinning in spite of his nerves, he made his way around the circle in the opposite direction, releasing each of the elements. When he was finished, they all rushed to congratulate him—all talking at once. All except Zoey.
He knew what was wrong with her, but he didn’t want to think about it just then. Didn’t want to talk about it just then.
Aphrodite approached him. “Ya know, you’re not bad for a kid.”
Buoyed by the miracle that had just happened to him, Kevin put a hand over his heart and bowed to her. “Aphrodite, Goddess of Love, Prophetess, Savior, and beauty—if you would spend some alone time with me, I’d show you youth has its benefits.”
Aphrodite’s smile was a cat licking cream. “Ooooh, Z, I know who got all the game in your family.”
“I’d like to add smart to my list of compliments,” Kev quipped.
The mountain of muscle called Darius stepped forward. “Back off, boy.”
Aphrodite slid her arm around the Warrior’s waist. “Oh, handsome, you’re adorable when you’re jealous.” As she and Darius walked away, she batted her impossibly long eyelashes at Kevin and blew him a kiss over her shoulder.
He fell back, pretending to catch her kiss, and almost knocked his sister over.
Zoey rolled her eyes.
“Yep, he’s totally threatened by me. I can tell.”
“You’re gonna get your butt kicked. I can tell,” Zo said.
Kevin took a Karate Kid stance, arms out like a crane. One foot lifted, he waved his hands like a giant bird and made a “Waaaa-chaw!” cry, jumping up and kicking out ridiculously. “That’s right. Um hum. He can try to kick my butt.”
Stark shook his head. “Pathetic. Truly pathetic. But also there’s no doubt that you’re Z’s brother.”
Zoey was staring at him. Kevin could see her struggling not to laugh and he jumped up again, yelling another “Waaaa-chaw!”
Zo started to giggle. She tried to stop, which made her snort, which in turn made Kevin snort. Then the whole room was laughing.
That’s when it happened.
It hit Kevin hard. He knew what he had to do. He didn’t want to. He wanted to do anything but that—except he really didn’t have any choice. He realized then he’d never really had any choice.
And his laughter changed. Turned to tears. The tears turned to sobs. Kevin stumbled to the statue of Nyx and knelt at her feet, as he had at his sister’s feet just a few minutes before.
Zo was there. So was G-ma. They put their arms around him. He felt the other four—air, fire, water, and earth join them in their tight circle of support and comfort, hope and love.
Then he said it. He finally said it. His voice was thick with tears, but he spoke carefully, so that it filled Nyx’s Temple and, hopefully, lifted to the Goddess herself.
“I’ve killed so many people. I didn’t want to. I didn’t let them suffer. But I did it. I did kill. And I have to go back. I have to join the rebels. I have to … I have to …” his words faltered as his heart broke. He didn’t want to leave. He wanted so, so badly to stay here in this wonderful world that wasn’t filled with war and insanity. He wanted to stay with his sister and her family of friends.
“Atone.” Zoey’s voice was soft, but it carried like the scent of vanilla and lavender, permeating everything.
Kevin sighed with relief and nodded. “Yes. I have to atone. To find forgiveness—if Nyx will let me.”
“Oh, Kev,” Z said through her tears. “She already forgives you. Now you have to find a way to forgive yourself.”
“I’ll find that back there. Back in that world. I can make a difference there, just like you have here.”
Zoey stepped back, wiping her eyes with G-ma. Stark produced tissues fr
om somewhere, handing them around the circle. Even Aphrodite and Darius joined them—though Darius didn’t even look close to crying.
“But how are you gonna get back?” Stevie Rae asked. “We barely know how we got you here.”
Kevin blinked in surprise at her. “That’s obvious. You just showed me how.”
“Huh?” Zo said.
“Do what you did to get me here again, only this time, do it backwards. Like you close a circle or end a spell or ritual—with the opposite of what you did before.”
“That might actually work,” said Damien.
“We should practice,” said Zoey.
Kevin put his hand on her shoulder. “I don’t have time for you to practice. I need to get back there.”
“You can wait a few days. Let us think through this. Experiment. What if we mess things up even worse than they are now?” Zo said.
Then G-ma surprised everyone. “Zoeybird, you have to let him go. Now. Don’t you see? The longer he stays here, the more difficult it will be for him to leave. And u-we-tsi-a-ge-ya, how would you feel if you had been pulled from this world and sent to another, only to discover how very badly you were needed back in your old world?”
Tears were washing Zo’s cheeks, but she nodded. “I—I get it. I understand. I just don’t want you to go.”
“Thanks, Zo. That means a lot to me. And I don’t want to go, either, but I have to. You know I have to.”
Zoey wiped her face and blew her nose. Then, in a loud, strong voice she said, “Okay, circle. Gather everything you had before. We’re going back to Woodward Park.”
29
Zoey
It took a surprisingly short time to gather the elements of the spell. My circle did it all. The only thing I did was sit with Kevin and tell him anything I could think that would help him back in that other world.
The whole time I pretended like he wasn’t really going to leave. A big part of me hoped he couldn’t.
“Stop it,” Kev said.
“What? I didn’t even say anything.”
“Stop thinking about it. There’s nothing we can do. I have to go. You know it. I know it. G-ma knows it. And I’ll bet Nyx knows it, too. So stop thinking about it.”