After a moment of silence, Lucas reached for my hand. “I’m sorry. I had no idea. I knew she didn’t want to go, but I didn’t know she’d hung on. And I didn’t know you’d been hurt.”
“I didn’t want to talk about it, because I felt so guilty. For sending her back. How could I do that?”
“How could you not? Jackie, you said it yourself. There wasn’t room for both of you. You did what you needed to do to survive. No one blames you for doing it, and you shouldn’t blame yourself. Besides, it was really me who forced Delia back to the gray place.”
“I know that logically. But it still feels as though it was me who did it. And sometimes I can still hear her. In my dreams, too.”
“Why didn’t you tell me?” Lucas steered the car to the exit that would lead us to Palm Dunes. “I might’ve been able to help you.”
“I didn’t want you to think I blamed you. I don’t. And I needed to figure it out myself.”
“Talking to Rafe helped?”
I hesitated. “Some, yes, but it wasn’t so much talking to him. It was . . . he gave me a choice. I could keep the memory, terrible as it was, or I could get rid of it. I could have him remove it, and then I’d be free. I think it was the idea of being able to make the decision myself. Having that small measure of control, when Delia had taken all of it away from me.”
Lucas turned into Golden Rays. “But you decided not to have him do it? To take them away?”
I shook my head. “No. I want to keep them, because they may end up to be important, and I think not getting rid of them was the wiser choice.”
He shot me a wide smile. “It’s the brave choice, without doubt.”
The warmth of his approval spread through me. “It might take me a little while to completely make my peace with what happened with Delia, but I think I’m on the right track.” I laced my fingers through his. “Talking to you helps. I’m sorry I didn’t do it before.”
“You had to do things in your own time. I understand.” The car bumped into his driveway, and after shifting into park, he pulled the keys from the ignition. Silence surrounded us.
I unbuckled my seat belt and turned to face Lucas. “Thank you for being so patient with me about needing time in other areas, too. Lots of guys wouldn’t have been so nice about it.” I wriggled my skirt up and swung one leg over his lap, straddling him, with my back to the steering wheel.
“What’s this?” His eyes gleamed in the dark, and his hands skimmed up my ribs.
“This is me, saying I’m ready.” I braced my hands on his shoulders and ground my center against the ridge under the fly of his jeans, the one that was growing at an encouraging rate the more I wiggled.
“Are you sure?” Lucas moved his hands so that his thumbs teased the bottom of my breasts, sending a line of fire down my body. Maybe my mind had been on a sex hiatus for the last week or so, but clearly my body was ready to rock and roll.
“I’m sure.” I rocked forward so that my nipples drilled into his palms. “Don’t I feel ready?”
“You feel fucking amazing.” He grasped the back of my neck with one hand and pushed my mouth to his, sealing his lips across mine as his tongue plunged between them. Yeah, he was definitely on board with this plan.
“So do you.” I snaked my hand between us, stroking at his erection, and Lucas hissed in a breath.
“Should we move this inside?” He shoved his fingers under my shirt, fumbling with the cups of my bra.
“No.” I tugged up his T-shirt, skimming over his chest and abdomen. “I’ve never had sex in a car before. I think this is the perfect time.”
“You know I love to introduce you to new things.” He grasped the hem of my shirt and lifted it. “Take this off.”
I twisted and did as he said, only getting it caught on my earring once. Lucas curled his fingers around the lacy cups of my bra and pulled them until my nipples were exposed to his mouth and his tongue.
“I love the taste of you here.” His lips moved against my heated skin as he whispered. “Different here than anywhere else.”
“Feels good.” I managed the words on a gasp. “Oh, God, so good.”
Lucas moved his mouth to the other breast and at the same time, pushed my skirt out of the way so that his fingers could reach between my legs. He slid one teasing finger beneath my underwear and into my folds, touching me everywhere but where I most needed him.
“You’re so wet. So ready. Tell me what you want, baby. Do you want me to stop? Want me to touch you somewhere else?”
“No.” I moaned and shifted, trying to get him to find the right spot. “Don’t stop. Harder. And—” I grasped his wrist and moved it so that his finger hit the small button of nerves that craved his touch. “There. Right there. Oh, God, keep going.”
He replaced his finger with his thumb and slid two slick fingers inside me, pumping them faster as my hips pinioned. I gripped his arms and rode his hand until pleasure exploded into shimmery, shiny stars that fell over us both.
I collapsed against his chest, touching my lips to his neck, tasting his desire and feeling the rapid beat of his pulse. Lucas ran his hands down my spine and cupped my ass.
“God, that was incredible.” I traced a circle on his clavicle with my tongue. “And now I want you inside me.”
I walked my fingers down his stomach to the button of his jeans, flicked it open and eased down the zipper. He lifted his hips so I could free his cock, and I fisted it, moving my hand up and down, stroking the smooth hardness until he groaned and gripped my hips.
“I need you now, baby. God, I need to be in you.”
I raised up and reached to slip my underwear aside. Lucas positioned himself at my entrance, sliding just slightly inside me. I eased down, inch by agonizing inch, until I was fully impaled on his erection.
And then I started to move.
Being on top was never comfortable for me in bed; it always felt like I was just missing the right spot, the right rhythm. But somehow this angle, in this small space where movement was limited, was perfect. I moved my hips in a way that sent a shot of pure pleasure through me. It must’ve felt pretty good to Lucas, too, since he moaned my name and jerked up in reaction.
“Let me . . .” He cupped one breast and lifted the nipple to his mouth as I continued to ride him. He sucked hard, worrying the sensitive bud between his teeth. His breath sped up, and I knew he was almost there.
“Love you, Jackie. Being in you is fucking perfect. God, baby, I’m close.”
He dropped his mouth back to my breast, but this time, his teeth sank into me just beyond the areola, and he sucked hard. I cried out in surprise, but the bite was more sensual than painful, and I writhed, coming hard for the second time.
Lucas released my breast, made a noise deep in his throat and thrust upwards, his body one huge, tensing muscle. I held onto him, whispering soft words of love as both of us caught our breath.
“So first time in a car. I popped your car cherry.” He kissed my neck just below my ear. “How was it?”
“Oh, I guess it was okay.”
“Just okay?” He poked at my ribs until I was gasping with laughter and begging for mercy.
“All right, all right, it was wonderful. Perfect.” I sat up and kissed him, long and hard, enjoying the feel of him still inside me. “The boob bite was new.”
I felt him tense a little. “Sorry. I couldn’t . . . well, usually it’s your thigh. That muscle that drives me crazy. But I couldn’t reach it, and so . . .” One shoulder lifted. “Instinct.”
“Not complaining. It was hot.”
I felt his lips curve. “Good. I was aiming for hot.” He nuzzled my neck. “Should we go inside?”
“Or we could go . . . again, here.” I rubbed against him.
“Hmmmm.” He pulled me tighter against him, and just as I began to feel a new tremor of want, a bright light blinded me.
“Who’s in there? Jackie? Lucas? Is that you?”
“Oh my God, it’s Mrs.
Ackers.” Lucas’s neighbor on the other side was infamous for her chronic insomnia. Clearly she’d been looking out her window and seen the car. And she’d probably seen movement in the car, and being the good neighbor that she was, she’d come down to investigate.
Lucas cursed eloquently and pulled me with him as he slid down. “Maybe she’ll just go away if we hide. And ignore her. Just be really quiet.”
His voice sounded so funny as he tried to be quiet, and the combination of that with the ludicrous situation struck me as incredibly funny. My body shook with laughter as we sunk lower until Lucas was almost flat on the seat.
“Lucas, she saw us. We can’t hide.”
“We can. And we will.”
“She’s not going to go away. She can’t sleep, she’s bored and she’s got nothing better to do than wait us out. So we can lay here like this until sunrise, or we can sit up and face the music.”
“Music I’m okay with. Mrs. Ackers, not so much.”
“My leg’s going to sleep. Hand me my shirt.” I managed to get it over my head and fixed the cups of my bra, then started to pull myself off Lucas. “Here, just—”
“Jackie, don’t move. If you roll off me, Mrs. Ackers is going to an eyeful of more than she expected.”
“Hey, what if I just cover you with my skirt until you zip up?” Without waiting for him to answer, I shifted, lifting off him and balancing on my arms until he tugged up his pants and fastened them.
“Okay, I’m good.” He sounded a little less freaked out.
“Let’s get out of the car, then.” I made to reach for the door.
“Wait.” Lucas gripped my arm. “Why don’t you just get out and walk Mrs. Ackers home? And once you’re far enough away, I’ll get out and go inside. I’ll meet you in your house.”
“Why do I have to do it?”
“Because. You can convince her it was just you in the car, maybe. Tell her you were just . . . I don’t know, listening to the radio. Having some ‘you’ time.”
I rolled my eyes. “Because I take my ‘me’ time in a car at midnight? She’s not going to buy it. And get real, Lucas. She saw you. She probably saw both of us being, um, us in a very unique way. Get over it, honey—there are no more secrets from Mrs. Ackers.”
He groaned. “How am I going to face her again?”
“You’re about to find out. Sitting here while she’s standing out there waving around that flashlight is only making it worse. Pretty soon, someone else is going to wake up, and before you know it, we’ll have a block party. Let’s minimize the damage while we can.”
I didn’t give him any more opportunity to argue. Grabbing the door handle, I pushed it open and pasted on a bright smile.
“Hey, Mrs. Ackers! Everything all right?”
Mrs. Ackers was not my favorite neighbor. There was a rumor in Golden Rays that she kept a pair of high-powered binoculars on the table next to her window, and I believed it. During the period of time after Lucas’s aunt had passed and before he’d moved in, when there was nothing but an empty house between us, she’d taken to wandering over any time she saw me outside. And she wasn’t fun like Mrs. Mac; no, Mrs. Ackers felt it was her duty to point out all of my shortcomings and steer me on the straight-and-narrow. Her advice ranged from dog training (Makani was just a baby puppy then) to the flowers in my garden (never a high priority in my life) to how many lights I left on at night.
Since Lucas had moved in, I’d gotten a slight reprieve, since he was now around to distract her from me. She’d made no secret of her disapproval of our relationship, saying we were setting a poor example by cavorting out in the open, not even bothering to try to hide the fact that Lucas spent most nights at my house. I wasn’t sure for whom we were setting that bad example, since we were the youngest two residences in the community, and let me tell you, what went on among the senior set was far more scandalous than what happened between Lucas and me. Until tonight, anyway.
“No, Jackie, everything is not all right. I was sleeping soundly, and you know how rare that is for me, with my insomnia—” She paused, giving me time to appreciate the tragedy of her sleep issues. “And I was awakened by a terrible racket coming from over here. I glanced out my window—” With her binoculars, no doubt. “—and saw movement in this car. Well, naturally, I assumed something nefarious was going on. Some young delinquents breaking into Lucas’s car. So imagine my shock when I came over here to investigate and saw–” Her lips pursed together, like she’d just swallowed a lemon. “—what I saw. Shameful, the both of you.”
I cast a backward glance at Lucas, who was still sitting in the driver’s seat, staring straight ahead, pretending Mrs. Ackers and I didn’t exist. Or maybe pretending he was driving far, far away.
“Mrs. Ackers, you know, if you suspected a crime, you should’ve called the police. It’s not safe for you to be out in the middle of the night, confronting possible criminals. Why, what if there really had been a break-in? You might’ve been seriously hurt.” I tried to steer the conversation to what might have happened and away from what really had, but she was having none of it.
“It’s bad enough that you two tromp between each other bedrooms with no regard for what’s right, but now you’re copulating out in the open? In automobiles?” She shook her head.
Lucas finally climbed out of the car, jamming his hands deep in the front pockets of his jeans. “Mrs. Ackers, you should probably go home. It’s late, and it’s chilly. Would you like me to walk you to your door?”
She drew herself up and shook her head. “No, thank you. I’m perfectly capable of getting home by myself.” She narrowed her eyes and planted her hands on her hips. “And I’ll thank you both to conduct yourself with a little more decorum.”
With that parting shot, Mrs. Ackers marched down the driveway, swinging her flashlight in self-righteous indignation. I sighed and shook my head.
“Well, that’s it. She’ll be up at the crack of dawn, making sure everyone in the neighborhood knows we were getting busy in your car. I’m going to have to move.”
Lucas closed his hand around my neck and leaned to kiss me, his lips searing mine and reminding me exactly why we’d been hot and heavy in the front seat. I stood on my toes and linked my hands behind his head, holding him to me. He traced a line to my ear with his mouth, the warmth of his breath making me shiver.
“Before you start packing up for that move, why don’t we move this party to your bed? I think we’ve got a little more catching up to do.”
AS I’D PREDICTED, the tale of our midnight lovin’ was already making the rounds of the neighborhood by the time I dragged myself out of bed the next morning. Mrs. Mac, who’d been sulking about Lucas’s tight lips in the Maddy affair, found it in herself to forgive both of us and was at the back door before noon, eager to tell us what was being said.
“Mrs. Ackers says you were doing kinky stuff, like in that movie I made you watch.” Delighted humor danced in my friend’s eyes. “I want to hear all about it.”
I groaned. “That is so not true. We weren’t—I mean, we were, but not like that. Just . . . you know, normal, everyday type of . . . stuff.”
“If you’re going to do it, honey, you need to be able to say it!” Mrs. Mac crowed and then collapsed into helpless laughter. “Oh, Jackie. I just wish I’d been there to see the look on your face. Oh, and Lucas’s, too. Where is he, anyway? Mortified? Off hiding?”
“No.” I shook my head. “He, ah, got called into . . . an appointment early this morning. He’d forgotten he had it.” The truth was, of course, that he’d been called to a Reckoning earlier and hadn’t returned yet. I was getting a little worried; Reckonings usually didn’t take him very long. It wasn’t a long process; Lucas showed up, as did the advocates, they each gave their reasoning for why the soul should be moved to one place or another, Lucas made his pronouncement and that was that. And once the soul had been sent to its destination, Lucas was transported back to wherever he’d been when he left. The whole dea
l was out of his hands, and the traveling was automatic. It wasn’t like he could stop on the way home to pick up a six-pack, so I had to assume something unexpected had gone down.
“Well, he’ll have to come out of hiding sooner or later. And you can tell him I consider this payback for him not coming clean with me about that murder. I could’ve had the scoop before everyone else, but no, he had to be close-mouthed and discreet. Do you know who I had to hear about Maddy’s murder from? Nancy Gray. Do you know how humiliating that was?”
Actually, I did. Nancy Gray was a lovely woman, one of the leaders in the Golden Rays community. She had a sweet husband whom she loved and who doted on her, children and grandchildren who visited frequently and a beautiful home with a garden that was the envy of the neighborhood. And she was Mrs. Mac’s arch enemy.
Not that Nancy Gray knew it, of course. But Mrs. Mac couldn’t stand Nancy, and because of that, hearing juicy gossip from the other woman was particularly painful.
“I’m sorry, Mrs. Mac. But hey, I can make it up to you now. Did you hear about the incident up in Crystal Cove last night? One of Crissy Darwin’s best friends was poisoned, and Lucas and I were there.”
Her eyes went wide. “Is she dead?”
“No, not as far as I know. She was rushed to the hospital, but I think they were able to save her.”
“Oh.” Mrs. Mac looked disappointed for a moment before she remembered herself. “Not that I’d want anyone to die, of course. But getting the skinny on an attempted murder isn’t the same as finding out the details on a real murder.”
“Sorry. I’ll have to work a little harder to make sure I’m at the more happening deaths in Palm Dunes.”
She waved her hand in the air. “Not your fault.” She winked at me. “Of course, if you’re too busy having sex in cars, you won’t get any hot gossip for me. I guess in that case, you are the hot gossip.”
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