Dante hooks a hand through the open face mask of his helmet rather than putting it on and guns the engine several times. His bike lurches forward, tilting sideways as he circles it out the end of our cul-de-sac. When he straightens, the engine growls and the front wheel comes up off the ground.
“Dante!” Catarina screams, running past me and Dad. She doesn’t stop. She trots right into the street, her open bathrobe billowing behind her.
“What did he do to you, Skye?” Dad demands, hovering over me, looking for wounds or injuries. “Are you okay?”
I glare at him and smack his hands away. No, I’m not okay. And not because of Dante. Because of him. The only wounds I have are the ones you can’t see. The ones to my heart.
Dad puts a comforting arm around my back.
I shrug abruptly. “Get off me!”
Right now, I hate my dad more than I’ve ever hated him before.
oOoOoOo + O+O+O+O
“I hate you, Gordon!” Catarina shouts as she slams the front door behind her.
Having already sprinted upstairs, I stop where I am on the landing and spin to watch the two of them through the bannister posts.
Dad is half way up the stairs, chasing me. He stops in his tracks and slowly turns to face Catarina.
I’ve never heard Catarina sound this unhinged. She’s a very together professional woman. Hearing Catarina say she hates my dad makes me feel like we’re kindred spirits. I want to say sarcastically, “You too, honey?” Just to make Dad feel stupid. But I don’t. I’m frozen in place. The dark look on Dad’s face before he turned toward Catarina was scaring the shit out of me. I’ve never seen him so angry. The irony here is that I’m the one who has the right to be mad. Not Dad.
“YOU PUSHED AWAY MY SON!!” Catarina yells. And I mean yells. Catarina has never been the kind of woman to raise her voice. Not this loud, anyway.
“I did no such thing, Catarina,” Dad says in an icy calm voice.
Catarina scowls at him.
“I was polite to him at dinner. I let him take Skye to the library to study. What did I do wrong?”
“Polite?” Catarina laughs. “That was polite? You practically rounded up a lynch mob to chase him out of town!”
Dad sneers at her. “You’re being irrational, Catarina. You sound like a child.”
“He heard you guys arguing!” I shout. “I heard you guys!”
Dad turns slowly, his head swiveling around like a tank turret. Then he fires his giant parental tank gun at me. “Go to bed, Skye. This doesn’t concern you.”
“It doesn’t?” I scream.
Dad’s eyes narrow like laser sights, like a sniper aiming for the kill shot. In a cold and amused voice, he says calmly, “Why is this bothering you so much, Skye? It’s not like Dante and you are old friends. You just met him this afternoon, didn’t you?”
Oh my god, is he reading my mind? I blurt, “I—” But I stop myself before I say anything else. Dad will use everything I say against me in a court of law or a family meeting or whatever.
“What?” Dad asks with deadly patience.
“Nothing,” I deflate.
“Go to bed, Skye. Catarina and I will work this out. Like…” he turns to face her, “…adults.”
I exchange a look with Catarina.
Her face trembles with restrained emotion. “It’s okay, Skye. Your father and I will figure this out.” Her obvious agony makes me question her confidence. “Go to bed.”
“Are you sure?” I ask. I feel like she needs backup on this. I’m ready to go in guns blazing.
“Bed, Skye,” Dad orders. “Now.” He’s using the big guns tonight.
Against my will, I turn and walk down the hallway toward my bedroom. I close the door most of the way, but leave a four inch crack. I sit down next to it and listen.
All I can hear are harsh whispers.
A moment later, footsteps, then the door of Dad’s downstairs office closing.
I can’t hear anything now. I’m tempted to sneak downstairs, but you can see into Dad’s office from the stairs. The door has a huge piece of glass in the frame and he’ll totally see me sneaking. Too bad the air vent trick doesn’t reach his office.
Still, I wait, sitting with my back against the wall next to my door.
I’m wired with adrenalin, so there’s no way I’m falling asleep any time soon. My mind races as I wonder what they’re saying to each other. How bad is this? How angry is Catarina? What is she going to do? What is Dad going to do? Will she leave? Will they get divorced? I don’t know. The suspense is burning a hole in my stomach. I think I’m getting an ulcer.
Can you get an ulcer in one night?
It sure feels like it.
Some time later, when my last drop of adrenalin has drained out of my system, I’m about to doze off. My head sags against the side of my desk. I can sleep sitting on the floor, right? I mean, it won’t make me feel any more miserable than I already do, will it?
The office door clicks softly open and I jolt awake. Footsteps pad up the stairs and the master bedroom door closes a moment later.
For several minutes, every muscle in my body remains tensed. What is going to happen? Will Catarina storm out of the master bedroom in the next ten minutes with a suitcase in her hand? Will Dad yell “Good riddance!” or something equally cruel as he slams the door behind her?
That’s what happened when my real mom left way back when. Except my mom was the one who did all the shouting, and she didn’t just shout “Good riddance!” It was much worse.
“Fuck you, Gordon! You worthless piece of shit!”
Shattering glass. Dishes thrown. Blood dribbling down Dad’s forehead…
I shiver at the thought and do my best to bury the painful memory. I smack my palms against my eyes, trying to hold everything in. My entire body starts to vibrate as every muscle contracts in agony. This always happens when I remember that night. I make fists and dig my short nails into my palms. It doesn’t take long for the sharp pain to bring me back to the here and now.
Not that it’s much better.
If Catarina leaves, I might go too. Throw some clothes on and climb out my window. But where would I go? Rox’s house? That’s probably the first place Dad would check. Then he’d have to drag me back home kicking and screaming. I can’t do that to Rox and her parents.
I sigh heavily.
If I don’t know where Dante went, what’s the point of leaving?
I mean, gosh, if I run away or whatever, I won’t get to focus on SATs and dream about the AP classes I’m going to take senior year. Whoop-dee-fucking-do.
After pushing my door closed, I crawl across my carpet and climb into bed. It takes all my strength to make it onto the mattress. When my head touches the pillow, I’m out like a light.
What a day.
Chapter 7
“Don’t you think Emily would love this for her birthday?” Rox’s face glows with glee as she holds up the cutest Hello Kitty plushie ever. Emily is Rox’s seven year old cousin and she’s obsessed with Hello Kitty. “It’s adorbs!”
“Defs,” I say, forcing a smile.
We’re in the Sanrio store at the Glendale Galleria shopping mall. Rox cradles the doll in her arm like a baby while continuing to browse the explosion of Hello Kitty paraphernalia. I drag along behind her.
“Is something bothering you, Skye? You’ve been morbid all day.”
“Is it that obvi?”
“Are you kidding? I haven’t seen you this glum since your dad said you had to study the SATs all summer.”
I grimace. Thinking about my dad only makes me hate him that much more.
“What’s going on? Spill it.”
I roll my eyes, “My dad is the biggest ass master ever.”
“What did he do this time?” she chuckles while browsing through a rack of Hello Kitty T-shirts.
“He pretty much chased Dante off last night.”
She looks at me seriously. “What do you mean?”
&
nbsp; “Dante is gone. He left last night and took all his stuff.”
“He’s gone?” Rox asks, surprised. “Like, for good?”
“I don’t know,” I moan. “I guess so.”
“Oh, no! I never had a chance to hook up with him!”
Neither did I. Well, I sort of did, but I was hoping for more than we had. “That’s only half of it,” I groan.
“What do you mean?! That’s all of it! He was going to be my senior fling!”
I ignore her comment. “Our parents are fighting.”
“Wait, whose parents?”
“Catarina and my dad. They were totally yelling at each other after Dante left. Catarina blamed Dad for pushing him away, and Dad blamed Catarina for—” I stop myself. I can’t tell Rox that Dad thought Dante was coming on to me. This is way too complicated.
“For what?”
“For, for… for mouthing off to him.” It’s somewhat true. “Dad thought Dante was being rude and disrespectful. He said, uh… he said Dante was a… a punk. Or something like that.” I need to start preparing my lies in advance. This is way harder than I thought.
Rox scowls. “What an ass.”
“Yeah,” I sigh.
“How bad did your dad and Catarina fight?” Rox asks carefully.
“Bad.”
“Like, divorce bad?”
“I don’t know,” I grimace. “Maybe?”
Rox looks distraught. “Hold on a second. Let me pay for this plushie. We’ll talk about it more in a second.” She takes the doll up to the counter where the Asian woman rings her up.
I wait near the entrance to the Sanrio store, watching people stroll past in the mall.
“What a surprise,” Ashley Masters says as she comes to a stop in front of me, holding a Bloomingdale’s bag at her side. “Nightlight shops at Hello Kitty.”
Brittany and Monica are with her. They both snicker at Ashley’s dig, also holding Bloomie’s bags.
I smirk at them. I didn’t think it was possible to feel any worse than I already do, but Ashley is an expert at dishing out misery. “We were buying something for Rox’s cousin, Ass-ley,” I growl.
“Ho, ho, ho,” she laughs sarcastically.
“What, are you supposed to be Santa Claus?” I smile to myself. Usually I’m not so quick with the clever comebacks. Brittany and Monica both look surprised. Score for me!
“Good one, Nightlight,” Ashley faux-smiles. “No, I was calling you a ho. Or didn’t you figure that part out?”
Bitch. I try to think of another comeback, but I’ve got nothing.
Sensing my defeat, Brittany and Monica cackle in unison, rubbing it in. If this was a gladiatorial arena, they would be giving the thumbs down from the cheap seats, cheering for Ashley to finish me off with a net and pitchfork.
Rox walks up beside me and wrinkles her nose with disgust. “Ew. Now I know what stinks.”
“Very funny, Slutter,” Ashley says.
“It’s Slaughter,” Rox snarls. “My last name is Slaughter.”
“Whatevs,” Ashley yawns. “Either way, you might want to wax your upper lip. Or didn’t you know that hair traps odor better than anything? That mustache of yours needs to go.”
Brittany and Monica both giggle. Is that all they have to contribute? What a bunch of hobots. Does Ashley program them to laugh on cue, or are they set that way at the factory?
“What do you want, Ashley?” Rox rolls her eyes. She doesn’t have a mustache or anything close to it.
Neither does Ashley. As usual, nothing is out of place on the body of Ashley Masters. From head to toe, from her expensive hair to her expensive shoes, she is the picture of effortless perfection. There’s nothing about her that can be picked apart. A gloat eases onto her face. “Oh, I was just asking Nightlight here how her math studies were coming along.” She drills me with a hateful look. “Have you figured out how to solve all those hard problems yet? Or are you still in the dark when it comes to advanced techniques?”
Oh, no! She knows! Brittany must’ve shown her the photo! I’m sure she knew minutes after it happened. That’s how these girls operate. No juicy gossip goes untold. I need to get Rox out of here before Ashley blurts out the truth. “Don’t you know how to be nice, Ashley? Like, for once in your life?” I say it with righteous judgment. Sticks and stones and all that jazz. I turn to Rox and grab her by the wrist, “Let’s go.”
“Urp!” Rox blurts as I yank her along behind me. She stumbles not to trip over herself. A minute later, when we’re passing Bloomingdale’s, she asks, “What was that about?”
“Oh, you know,” I grimace. “Ashley is a supernatural bitch. That’s all the excuse she needs.”
Rox glances back at Ashley with a thoughtful look on her face. “Ashley wasn’t at the library last night when you were there with Dante, was she?”
“Huh? No. I don’t think so.” That much is the truth. It was Brittany who took the photo. I don’t think Ashley was there.
“So how does she know about your math studies?”
Damn it. Rox is putting the pieces together. I have to throw her off the scent. “Uhh… remember when we were at Blazing Waters and we saw Ashley by the bathrooms?”
“Yeah?”
“I mentioned to her that I had spent the whole summer studying for the SATs. Math in particular.”
“I don’t remember that.”
“Oh, it was when you were still in the bathroom. And me and Dante waited for you?” That part is definitely a lie.
“Really?” She sounds like she wants to believe me. Which makes me feel worse. “Why would you tell her that?”
I shrug. “Uh, um, oh yeah! I said something like ‘I’d rather be studying math right now than talking to you.’” I force a smile. “I totally put her in her place.” Wow, I barely believe myself. But I need Rox to believe me. Even if I am spinning more lies.
Rox processes it for a moment. Then a grin slowly shines on her face. “Nice. That bitch needs to be put in her place at least once a day. We should do it more often. Now, about your Dad and Catarina.”
I shake my head. “Don’t remind me.” I now feel three times more nauseous than I did when we walked into Sanrio.
Rox smiles sympathetically. “I think you and I need a sugar high. I want to wash the taste of Assley out of my mouth, don’t you?”
“That’s what I called her before you came out of Sanrio,” I chuckle.
“Great minds think alike,” she grins. “Let’s go to Godiva for a chocolate pick me up. Then we can brainstorm some good put downs for the next time we have to deal with Her Royal Assness.”
“That bitch is such a butt barnacle,” I groan.
Rox giggles, “That’s the spirit!”
oOoOoOo + O+O+O+O
“Can you smell the teen spirit? It’s the first day of senior year!” Rox squeals at the wheel a few days later. “Our last year of high school!”
I groan where I sit hunched over in the passenger seat of her mom’s Toyota as we drive all of one mile to school first thing in the morning.
I don’t even think the sun’s awake yet.
Who decided school should start so early?
Rox is totally happy because her parents bought a new Toyota a few days ago, so now the old one is hers, meaning she gets her own car for senior year. Yay for her. If my Dad sold his BMW 760Li and bought a regular Mercedes like a normal rich person, he could easily afford to get me a car. But he doesn’t want me getting into any more trouble than I already do. I’m not talking about Dante. I’m talking in general. It’s been a running theme at my house since I started high school. Keep Skye out of trouble. Keep her on the straight and narrow.
Not that I want anything from my Dad at this point. Ever since he chased Dante off, I’m beginning to question everything my dad has given me. From the roof over my head to his insistence on college.
After a few minutes of driving, Rox turns the Toyota into the parking lot at North Valley High. It’s crammed with cars. Parents
dropping off freaked out freshman. Saucy sophomores acting like they’re the shit just because they’re not freshman anymore. Jubilant juniors excited to be upperclassmen who are old enough to drive themselves to school. And seasoned seniors pretending to be above it all but thrilled to be on top of the social ladder by default. The energy is bustling, but I can’t rise to the occasion.
I’m exhausted.
I’ve barely slept since the night Dante left. It’s been a stress fest at the house ever since. All thanks to Dad. Catarina isn’t talking to him. I’m seriously worried about the two of them. They’ve never gone this long without talking. In fact, I don’t think they’ve ever gone without talking. They’ve always managed to work through things.
Worse, Dante never came back. Nobody knows where he went. There’s a black hole in my heart that wasn’t there before Dante came along, so I think we can safely attribute my dark mood to his absence.
After a few days of missing him, I went online and looked up that hexayurt video he mentioned over dinner that first night. The one where he helped build housing for those tribes from the Amazon. Watching him talking to the camera about all the good they were doing for those displaced people made me miss him that much more. I had to stop watching the video half way through because tears were streaming down my face and I kept wanting to go find Dad and yell in his face about what an ass he was.
Does it make sense that I miss Dante so bad? No. So what if I only knew him for one day? He’s a great guy. And we were… intimate together. Maybe it wasn’t love, but it was the start of something. I sigh to myself so Rox doesn’t hear me and ask me what’s wrong for the thousandth time in the last few days. I’m so glad she cares, but I hate having to lie and say I’m just worried about Dad and Catarina. Sure, that’s true, but only half of the truth. I’ve never hidden so much from Rox ever. It feels wrong, but I’m trying to get used to it. Maybe I’ll tell her the truth in a few months when everything gets back to normal.
Rox pulls into a parking space and turns off the ignition. “We’re here! Day one of our last year of high school! High fives!” She holds up both palms expectantly.
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