by Toni Aleo
She giggles. “Nope, right mind, and I think it would do you both good.”
“Do us both good?” I pause before lowering my voice. “Riana, we don’t even know each other. At this point, I don’t need any complications. Getting involved with Lincoln would be complicated. I just need sex with a willing man.”
She scoffs. “Well, bet ya ten bucks you won’t do Dennis and think of Dennis. Your mind will be consumed by Lincoln. Do you know he has abs? Like thick ones. He’s the one who got Phillip in shape.”
Information I did not need to know.
“I am disgusted by you,” I say, pressing my hand to my chest. “This man is the caregiver of my children. He’s not just some piece of ass.”
She’s too busy laughing. “Whatever. You watch. I’ll get to tell you, ‘I told you so’ in no time.”
“You will not,” I say just as the train slows at my stop. “I’ll call you back.”
“Drive safe!” she yells, but I don’t answer.
I know I’ll hear about this later. I don’t need to think of Lincoln like that. Harmless fantasies are one thing, but giving myself false hope is another. Riana is encouraging my lust for the manny! Which blows my mind! Doesn’t she realize that if I did jump in the sheets, the boys would suffer?
If I learned anything from my divorce, it’s don’t sleep with the nanny.
Or manny.
Whatever.
Throwing everything in my car, I check and realize I have plenty of time to get home. After a short drive, I pull into the driveway beside Lincoln’s SUV. When I reach the door, arms full of work, he is waiting for me.
His hair is tousled, like he has been running his fingers through it over and over again. The shirt he wears is loose-fitting but tight on his shoulders. His biceps are bulging, and when the hell did I start to think forearms are sexy?
Breathless, I give him a smile as he reaches for the box.
“I didn’t know you were coming home early,” he says.
“Yeah, their father’s wife is coming to get them. I wanted to be here for that.”
I point to the table. “You can put that there.”
“Cool,” he says.
I try so hard not to watch the way his back moves, but apparently, along with beards, I’m becoming attracted to backs.
Get it together, Woods.
Clearing my throat, I say, “You can go home.”
“Oh,” he says, and then he points to the kitchen. “I was in the middle of cleaning out the fridge. I thought I had more time before you got home.”
Unsure what to say, I stumble on my words. “Oh, that’s okay, I can finish it.”
He points to the box, and with each motion he takes, a new whiff of his cologne almost knocks me on my ass. “Looks like you have a lot more to do than what I started.”
Get your head right, Woods!
Though he is right, I don’t want to admit it. When I meet his gaze, he is smiling, and I’m not sure how, but I smile back at him. “Okay—”
But before I can finish, the doorbell rings.
“Son of a bitch,” I mutter. I feel Lincoln move behind me to look through the peephole.
“Ah, the wife.”
I groan. “The wife,” I say before I reach for the door. “Boys, let’s go.” After I open the door, I move out of the way. “They’re going to be a second. I just walked in. I thought you wouldn’t be here until six.” Without waiting for her to answer, I head to the bottom of the stairs. “Boys,” I holler once more. I hear them moving.
“I was over on this side of town, and Simon told me to come get them.”
I don’t look at her. “Can you call next time?”
“Yeah, I guess I should have,” Kaia says, her voice very unsure.
My heart is heavy as I watch the boys run back and forth upstairs, gathering their things. I had hoped to have dinner with them before they left. This is beyond annoying, but this is my new normal. I have to remember that.
“You were at practice.”
I look back at the sound of Kaia’s voice to find her talking to Lincoln. She looks small beside him. Before, she was always so put together, hair always done and nails perfectly manicured, but that isn’t how she looks today. Her hair is a mess, and while she’s still dressed to the nines, I don’t miss the paleness in her face or that her nails are chewed to the quick. I shouldn’t find joy in this, but in some sick way I do, because the woman who stole my husband looks like shit.
“Phillip’s friend,” she says, as a statement rather than a question.
Lincoln nods. “Yup, that’s me. Lincoln Scott.”
They shake hands before she looks back at me and then grins. It’s the way she used to grin at me when we found a guy good-looking on one of the many girl dates we had. We were so close, but she ruined that. Just as quick as the grin came, it is gone when I set her with a look. She looks away, threading her fingers over her growing stomach.
Ugh, I’m so pissed.
“Nice to meet you,” she purrs.
I don’t usually want to throat punch people, but Kaia is high up there on my list.
Lincoln doesn’t answer as the twins come running down the stairs. They’re dressed and ready to go, which is a surprise. Another sign of how Lincoln has changed things. I thought they’d take longer. Coming toward me, they drop their bags before they wrap themselves around me.
Elliot squeezes me. “I thought we’d get to see you before we go.”
“I’m sorry, love. Kaia was on this side of town and wanted to get you guys early,” I say, kissing their heads. “Don’t worry, I’ll be at the game tomorrow. And then Sunday, we’ll watch movies and eat loads of crap food that Lincoln bought.”
Elliot smiles up at me. “Sounds like fun.”
I beam down at their beautiful faces. Though their looks favor Simon, that would never change how much I love them. They are my little balls of sunshine. “What do you think, Louis?” I ask.
Finally looking up at me, he shrugs. “I don’t want to go.”
“I know, my love, but you have to.”
“And we’re gonna have so much fun! We’re going to the movies tonight,” Kaia says. But neither boy looks at her.
“Why? Isn’t Dad gone?” Charlie’s voice comes from the top of the stairs.
I look up at him as the twins’ hands thread with mine.
Three little squeezes taking my breath away.
“Yes, but I thought we could go together,” Kaia says then, but Charlie doesn’t seem interested. He comes down the stairs, facing me.
“I thought we were eating dinner first,” Charlie groans.
“She came early ’cause she was on this side of town, no need to drive all over,” I tell him as the boys move. Reaching for my oldest, I pull him in close. “Please be good. Don’t be mouthy?”
He scoffs at my neck. “I don’t want to go to the movies with her.”
“I understand, but she is your stepmom,” I say, pulling back and cupping his face in my hands. “Be respectful.”
His brown eyes mirror mine as he slowly nods. “I’ll try.”
Well, I can’t ask for more. He is having such a hard time, and yesterday’s therapy session hadn’t gone well.
“Thank you,” I say, kissing his cheek. He attempts to move away, but I get him anyway. Sending him a grin, I take his hand in mine and squeeze it three times. His eyes widen, but by the grace of God, a small smile fills his face. “I’ll see you tomorrow at the game. Call me if you need me.”
“I will,” he says, moving past me, and when I turn, I see the boys are waiting for him. With his shoulders back, he walks with them toward Kaia. Clearing his throat, he says, “I don’t want to go to the movies. Do you guys?”
Like I knew they would, the boys agree with him as they walk out the door, leaving Kaia behind. She looks back at me, dejection in her eyes, but I just stare at her with the fiery depths of hell swirling in mine.
“Guess I’ll go,” she says.
&nb
sp; “Guess you will,” I say with my chin high, and without another word, she leaves my house, shutting the door behind her.
“Shit. I wouldn’t want to be on the other side of that ice-cold gaze.”
I look at Lincoln. I had forgotten he was there. “Oh. Yeah. She isn’t my favorite person.”
“No?” he asks with a laugh. “I thought she was your bestie.”
“Used to be,” I say, heading to the kitchen. “Not anymore. For obvious reasons.”
“No shit,” he says, following behind me. “I thought she was just the nanny.”
I exhale hard, not wanting to rehash this. “She worked for us for a while. We became close.”
“That sucks,” he says, and he sounds genuinely upset for me. As if he gets how awful it was for me to find out my best friend stole my husband. It’s nice and doesn’t help me at all with keeping my feelings at bay for him. His voice is so damn deep and throaty. Raspy almost. All I can do is picture him whispering the dirtiest things in my ear with that voice.
I shake my head to get those thoughts out of my head before I say, “It is what it is.”
Ignoring the mess around me, I go into the cabinet and reach to the very back for a bottle of wine. Pouring a hearty glass, I lean into the counter and then take a long sip. The sip doesn’t take away the pain of watching my boys go with Kaia, but it at least gives me the promise of not giving a fuck by the time I’m done with the glass. If that doesn’t work, I have at least three more bottles hidden in the kitchen.
“You hide your wine?”
I open my eyes to find Lincoln watching me, his eyes dark as he grips the counter. Swallowing, I nod. “I had to when Riana was staying here all the time. She doesn’t like when I drink.”
“Really? I didn’t know she had an issue with it,” he says, leaning his hip into the island as he looks at me. He is so large, so thick, and Jesus, beautiful.
“You know we lost our parents, right?” When he nods, I go on. “It was by a drunk driver.”
He presses his lips together. “I’m sorry.”
“Thank you, but because of that, she doesn’t want me drinking. She does the same thing to Phillip too.”
“She doesn’t do it to me.”
I smile. “You don’t have kids who would be left behind,” I answer.
He nods. “Yeah, I guess I don’t.” There is a certain sadness in his eyes that follows that statement.
I take another long sip of my wine. While he works on the mess that is my fridge, I watch him for a moment. I could take my glass upstairs and soak in the bath, where I’d probably cry for hours, or I could get to know the guy who is caring for my sons. While I’m always ready for a nice cry fest, I really want to know Lincoln.
“So your family lives here?”
He nods as he wipes down the bottom shelf of the fridge. “Yup, on the other side of town. My dad is a truck driver, and my mom is a stay-at-home grandma since all her kids have moved out. My second oldest sister comes in and out a lot. She can’t seem to get her shit together.”
I lean my glass against my cheek. “Happens.”
“It does,” he says, glancing over at me. “She’s a good sister. Not my favorite but good.”
I laugh. “How many do you have?”
“Six.”
“Good Lord!”
He laughs. “Yeah, I’m the baby. I’ll let your imagination run wild on how that was.”
Don’t you dare do that, Woods.
If I did, my heart might not be able to handle it. Clearing my throat, I ask, “So that’s why you like kids?”
“Yeah, I guess. I grew up with no say whatsoever with seven women, but once my sisters started having kids, I was always the one to take care of them. I don’t know. I just like kids.”
“That’s cute,” I say, and I mean it.
“Are you making fun of me, Ms. Woods?”
Oh, the way he says my name is dangerous. Breathless, I attempt a smile. “No sir, I am not. I may have found it weird at the beginning, but maybe I was just being a judgmental bitch.”
His lips quirk as I take another long gulp of my wine. “You found it weird?”
“Yeah, Riana told me about you before the long line of nannies who didn’t work out, but I didn’t want to go with you because you were male. A male nanny was weird to me, but now, I think you’re better at being a mom than I am.”
His brows pull together. “That’s not true. I could never be you. Your boys adore you. Honestly. They talk about you all the time.”
My heart warms. “They do?”
“They do. Charlie isn’t as vocal, but he loves you.”
I want to cry. Turning around, I reach for the bottle and take another sip. “He makes me nervous.”
“I bet.”
“He isn’t handling all this well, and the therapist isn’t happy with his progress. I just don’t want him to end up like Phillip did. Drinking his way through college and letting himself go.” When I’m met with his hearty laughter, I smile. “What? It’s true!”
“I know. I was right there with him through those times. We had some fun.”
Oh, I know they did, though I don’t say that. “I don’t want that for Charlie.”
Lincoln nods in agreement. “I don’t think Charlie will end up like that. Especially with having Phillip as an uncle. He can learn from Phillip’s mistakes.”
“Yeah.” I let out a long sigh. “I hope you’re right.”
“I wouldn’t worry too much. Phillip had some inner demons that no one could understand. Charlie is well-rounded. He’s just upset his family isn’t what society deems as normal. He’s finding his bearings. He’s a great kid.”
My heart soars. “Thank you. I think so too.”
Swirling my glass, I glance over at him, and our gazes meet. His eyes go dark, and heat rushes through my body. It gathers between my legs as I watch his lips part slightly. He slowly wipes a small plastic container of butter, and all I can think is that I wish he’d open it and rub it on me.
What in the world?
Shaking my head, I pull my gaze from his. “So are you married?”
He scoffs. “No.”
“Girlfriend?”
“Nope.”
“Boyfriend?”
His head jerks up, and then he laughs. “Why does everyone assume I’m gay!”
“That’s a no, right?”
“No, I’m not,” he says with a dry look.
I grin at him, and I’m two seconds from snorting with laughter.
“You knew that, though.”
“I did. Riana told me. I just wanted to make sure.”
He rolls his eyes. “Well, I’m not.”
“Good,” I say, and honestly, I don’t know why I said that. I don’t care if he is dating.
Right?
“Good?” he asks, his eyes teasing mine.
I blink. “I don’t know why I said that.”
“You don’t?” A slow grin pulls at his lips, almost like he is fighting back his laughter.
“I don’t,” I say quickly, and then I take a pull of my wine, his laughter filling the room. “Sorry. I shouldn’t have pried like that.”
“Why not?” He’s watching me, his eyes hungry and his lips wet as if he just licked them.
I want to take a picture so that I can show Riana how he looks at me! Like he wants to eat me. The thing is, I’d let him in a heartbeat.
“Because it’s none of my business,” I say simply.
He shrugs. “It can be.”
My eyes widen.
He continues to grin, his eyes full of lust. “Are you seeing anyone?”
I scrunch up my face in confusion. Why does he care? “Why?”
“Just asking. Getting to know you.”
“Shouldn’t you ask what my favorite color is before you ask if I’m dating?”
He holds my gaze. “You asked me.”
He had me there. “Oh, well. I guess I do have a date tomorrow.”
; He scoffs. “You guess?”
I shrug, shaking my head. “Riana pushed me into finding someone to have sex with. So I chose the guy from accounting.” I pause. “Why in the hell am I telling you that?”
His laughter fills the room, and it’s such a deep sound, something I hadn’t heard before. “You feel comfortable,” he decides, his eyes moving along my face, and once more, I’m breathless. Am I comfortable? How’d that happen? “So you chose a guy from accounting?”
I find myself giggling as I shake my head. “He isn’t my type, but I need something. Or better yet, Riana says I need something. I don’t know. It’s stupid.”
He doesn’t say anything, moving the rag along the shelf for the milk and tea before putting them back in the fridge. “Shouldn’t you choose someone you want, though?”
My heart jumps up into my throat as our gazes lock once more. I don’t know what it is about the pull his eyes have, but man, they capture me. “I don’t exactly have a line of men wanting to take me out.”
“Maybe you just don’t see them.”
I can only blink, unsure what he means by that. I think I know, but is that just my vagina being hopeful? “I’ll probably cancel.”
“I think you should.”
“You do?”
“Yeah, you’re obviously not into him.”
“True, but apparently I’m not supposed to be into him. I just need to have sex.” His lips quirk, and I smile back. “From what Riana says… And wow, this wine is making me loosey goosey.”
That makes him laugh. “My mom says that after a bottle.”
I hold my glass to him. “Smart woman.”
“She is,” he says as he puts the rest of the stuff back in the fridge. He throws the rag in the sink and then washes his hands. He’s right there. All I have to do is reach out and touch him. Take what I want, but I won’t.
I need him.
Looking over his shoulder at me, he says, “She’d always say don’t waste a good fuck on someone who doesn’t matter.”
I blink. “Your mom says fuck?”
His face lights up. “She does.”
“She sounds like my kind of person.”
“She’d probably say the same about you,” he says, leaning against the sink as he dries his hands. “She’d also commend you on how you acted with the boys toward that chick. You don’t owe it to her to be nice.”