She nodded. ‘I didn’t know I had vertigo,’ she said. ‘I was fine on the way up.’
Lukas picked up the torch and switched it on, and she saw that he was smiling gently at her.
‘You scared me to death,’ he said, and that’s when she fainted.
24.
Celeste was in the living room at Little Eleigh Manor when there was a series of loud bangs on the front door. Frinton, who’d been lying on his back by her feet, snoring sonorously, was up in an instant, charging across the hallway like a bullet leaving a gun. Celeste looked at the clock. It was after eleven. Perhaps it was Evie and she’d forgotten her key again, although it was a bit early for Evie after a night out.
She crossed the hallway to join Frinton at the door.
‘Evie?’ she called through the thick wood.
‘Yes,’ a male voice answered and Celeste opened the door.
‘Who are you?’ she cried a moment later as she saw her sister slumped against a young man’s shoulder. She shushed Frinton, who was barking in excitement at the late-night visitor.
‘I’m Lukas.’
‘What’s happened to Evie? Is she drunk?’
‘She fainted,’ Lukas said. ‘She fainted!’
‘Oh, my God, Evie!’ Celeste was beside her in a moment, her arm around her sister’s shoulders.
‘She went to get the painting,’ Lukas tried to explain as they brought Evie into the hallway.
‘What?’ Celeste said. ‘QUIET, Frinton!’
‘The painting at your father’s house. I told her she was a fool to even think of pulling such a stunt but she insisted on going through with it.’
‘But she told me she was going to Colchester to see a friend,’ Celeste said.
‘She wasn’t going to Colchester,’ Lukas said.
‘Evie!’ Celeste cursed. ‘Let’s get you up to bed, where you should have been in the first place at this time of night.’
‘What’s going on?’ Gertie said, appearing in the hallway. She was wearing a long red cardigan over her nightdress and looked as if she’d been asleep. ‘What’s wrong with Evie?’
‘She fainted!’ Lukas said, and he told Gertrude what had happened that evening.
‘Vertigo? I didn’t know she had vertigo,’ Gertie said.
‘Neither did she until she was at the top of the ladder, on the way back down,’ Lukas said. ‘I’ve never been so scared in my life. When I think of what might have happened . . .’ His voice petered out into nothing.
‘Let’s just get her upstairs,’ Celeste said.
‘I can do it myself,’ Evie said. It was the first time she’d spoken since arriving home, but Celeste wasn’t convinced.
‘You’re weak and in shock,’ Celeste told her. ‘Gertie – do you want to get her some hot milk? Maybe a splosh of brandy in it?’
Gertie nodded and left them.
When they finally made it to Evie’s room, they helped her off with her shoes and eased her gently into bed.
‘Better?’ Celeste asked.
‘I got the painting, Celly,’ Evie said in a whisper, her bright eyes half-closing in the lamplight.
‘We’ll talk about that in the morning,’ Celeste told her.
‘Aren’t you pleased?’
‘I’m pleased you didn’t break your neck,’ Celeste said.
Evie closed her eyes and Celeste turned to Lukas. He was still looking pale and shaky, his fair hair sticking up at weird angles around his face as if he’d been electrocuted.
‘Perhaps we should get you a splosh of brandy too,’ Celeste said.
‘I wouldn’t say no,’ he said, sitting down in an old armchair by the window. Like Celeste’s bedroom, the room had sloping floorboards covered in an ancient and threadbare rug. Its walls were of oak panelling and the curtains, although of good quality, had long since had their heyday. Still, the room was very much Evie and you could see her touches everywhere, from the stuffed teddy bears and old ragdolls who sat in a happy jumble on top of a blanket box to the line of make-up bottles and hair dyes on her dressing table.
Gertie entered the room with a mug of warm milk.
‘There’s just a smidgeon of brandy in it,’ she said, sitting on the edge of the bed and handing it to Evie, who sat up after Celeste had plumped her pillows behind her.
‘Is Esther there?’ Evie asked.
‘Esther?’ Celeste said in surprise.
‘I want to see her.’
‘Whatever for?’ Celeste asked. ‘She’s probably in bed. It’s very late.’ Evie didn’t answer as she sipped her hot milk so Celeste left the room. ‘Keep an eye on her,’ she said to Gertie. ‘And I’ll get you some of that brandy,’ she told Lukas.
Celeste went downstairs, Frinton following close behind her.
‘You can’t come with me,’ she told the dog, sending him into the living room, where he reluctantly curled up with a half-eaten toy for company.
‘Esther?’ Celeste called a minute later, knocking gently on their new house companion’s door.
‘Who is it?’
‘It’s Celeste. Evie’s calling for you. She’s not feeling very well.’
A moment later, the door opened and there stood Esther, her white hair loose around her shoulders and her face just as pale. She was wearing an enormous brown woolly cardigan that swamped her tiny frame and gave her a teddy bear-like appearance.
‘I hope I didn’t wake you,’ Celeste said.
‘Pah!’ Esther said. ‘I don’t sleep until at least one o’clock. Let me see Evie.’ She charged out of the doorway and headed for the stairs. She could move surprisingly quickly when she wanted to.
‘Which room is it?’ she barked when she’d reached the top of the stairs.
‘On the left,’ Celeste said. ‘The open door.’
Celeste followed her in a moment later.
‘Esther?’ Evie said from the bed, her eyes opening and a small smile spreading across her face.
‘I’m here,’ Esther said, taking Gertie’s place on the side of the bed. Gertie exchanged looks with Celeste. What was happening, they seemed to ask? Why had their sister asked for Esther, of all people? She didn’t even like her, did she? She was scared of her.
‘Lukas? Come and have that brandy,’ Celeste said. ‘I could probably do with one myself.’
He stood up. ‘You all right now?’ he asked Evie.
She nodded. ‘Thank you,’ she said and he smiled before leaving the room with her two sisters.
Evie and Esther were left alone.
The old woman leaned across the bed to pick up Evie’s hand just as Evie had known she would. It was a simple but deeply comforting gesture and Evie immediately felt at peace.
‘You’ve got yourself in a right state, haven’t you?’ she said. ‘What happened?’
Evie took a deep breath and told her about the evening.
Esther shook her head. ‘You risked your life for a painting?’
‘I didn’t risk my life,’ Evie said with a tut.
‘No? What do you think would have happened if you’d fallen from the top of that ladder?’
Evie shrugged. ‘I might have been a bit bruised. But it wasn’t me I was worried about.’ She hesitated for a moment. ‘It was the baby.’
‘You’re pregnant?’ Esther said.
Evie nodded. ‘Please don’t say anything!’ she suddenly said, leaning forward and clasping Esther’s right hand in both of hers. ‘I haven’t told anyone.’
‘I wouldn’t dream of it,’ Esther said. ‘It’s his, isn’t it? That boy out there?’
Evie nodded.
‘Well, he looks a decent sort. He’ll stand by you – do the right thing.’
‘But I don’t want him to do the right thing. This is my baby!’ Evie said, her hands returning to her lap.
Esther looked confused. ‘But it’s his, too.’
Evie shook her head. ‘He doesn’t have to be involved.’
‘Don’t you think you should let him make that decision?’
‘He won’t be around for long,’ she said.
The expression on Esther Martin’s face changed and she suddenly looked like the stern old lady who had chased the young Evie from her garden with a broom. Startled, Evie wondered why she’d invited her into her bedroom and had her sitting on her bed.
‘Now, listen here, Evelyn Hamilton! You have to tell that young man and let him make his own mind up. A baby isn’t a toy that you can keep all to yourself – it’s a living, thinking, feeling being and, one day, that baby is going to grow up and ask where its father is and why you took it upon yourself to hide him. What will you do then? What will be your excuse? Because, let me tell you, nothing you can come up with will be good enough if you’ve stopped a decent man from being involved with his own flesh and blood.’
Evie stared at Esther’s serious and startlingly pale face. It was, perhaps, the first time in her life that an adult had given her such a selfless and honest piece of advice, and she wasn’t quite sure how to respond. Her mother had never been one to offer any guidance on anything. Every conversation Evie had ever tried to open had always resulted in her mother turning the conversation around to herself, like the time when Evie had split up with her first boyfriend at high school. She’d been heartbroken and in tears, but when she’d told her mum about it, she’d reprimanded her and told her to forget him. That was all. Forget about him. That was the only thing she’d said about it and, of course, that was the very thing a heartbroken teenager was incapable of doing.
Evie couldn’t remember a single time when her mother had offered her any useful advice at all, which was probably why Esther’s tirade was so startling to her now.
‘But I –’
‘No buts!’ Esther said, holding a stern finger up in the air. ‘You have a responsibility to both father and child.’
They sat in silence for a moment, Evie absorbing Esther’s words. Instinctively she knew that Esther had her best interests at heart and that she’d listen to her – really listen to her – if she had anything else to say.
‘I just wanted something of my own,’ she said at last.
Esther frowned. ‘What do you mean?’
Evie sighed and her slim shoulders sank a little. ‘I can’t explain it,’ she said.
‘Try,’ Esther said, and Evie looked into the pale blue eyes which were examining her so closely that it almost hurt. Growing up in a household full of women, it had been easy to be overlooked. Her mother had always been so obsessed about Hamilton Roses doing well, and Celeste had always had enough on her plate working alongside their mother and Gertie too. So Evie felt as if she’d more or less grown up alone.
‘Don’t get me wrong,’ she said. ‘I adore my sisters and I’m sure I only ever needed to ask if I wanted anything, but they were always so busy growing up. I felt like they never had time for me. I always felt so – so young. I was always in the way. “Go and play somewhere else, Evie,” they’d say or, “I haven’t got time right now – come back later.” And Mum was always working during the day and going out to parties in the evenings. I never really had anyone to be with.’ She paused.
‘You mean you’re having a baby in order to stop being lonely?’ Esther asked.
‘No,’ Evie said. ‘Well, maybe partly. It’s more than that, though. I feel I’ve got all this love in me. Sometimes it scares me and I know that my sisters don’t need it – not really. Celeste has always been such a loner. She’s always taken care of herself in her own way, and Gertie would rather look for answers in a romantic novel than ever think to ask me for advice. But this baby – this baby –’
‘Can’t ever be a substitute for what’s lacking in your own life,’ Esther said gently.
‘I know that,’ Evie said. ‘But I know I can be a good mother. I just know it! And I don’t need anyone else to help me do that.’
Esther shook her head. ‘We always need somebody else. Don’t be going through life thinking you can cope on your own. Sure, you might be able to for a while, but it’s a pretty lonely existence, I can tell you.’
Evie looked at Esther. ‘How did you cope when your husband died?’
‘I didn’t. I fell apart. After losing Sally, it was almost too much to bear. I’ve never very much liked my own company, you see.’
Evie frowned. ‘But you’ve lived alone for so many years.’
‘I didn’t have much choice, did I?’
‘You could have moved in with us sooner,’ Evie said.
‘With your mother?’
Esther’s horrified tone of voice made Evie smile. ‘Ah, yes. That might have been tricky.’ They lapsed into silence again and then Evie gave a little sigh. ‘I’ve never talked to anyone like this.’
‘Not even your mother?’ Esther asked.
Evie laughed. ‘You’re kidding?’
Esther frowned. She did frowning very well. ‘What would she have said about all this?’
Evie looked thoughtful but then shrugged. ‘I don’t think I would have told her. I would have had to leave home before she threw me out. She always made it perfectly clear that none of us were to disgrace her because she wouldn’t stand for it.’ Evie shook her head at the memory. ‘It seemed so strange to me at the time – she’d tell me these things when I was just fourteen and I hadn’t even been kissed before. “Don’t you bring shame on me!” she’d say. I suppose that was fair enough.’
Esther Martin stared at Evie. ‘She would have thrown you out, and you think that would have been fair enough?’
‘Of course,’ Evie said. ‘If I’d disgraced her.’
Esther shook her head in obvious disapproval.
‘Anyway, I’d never have been able to talk to her like this,’ Evie went on. ‘She never really listened to me. Not that I ever opened up to her or anything. She was always so busy and I didn’t like to bother her. That wouldn’t have been fair. She used to spoil me with gifts and, when you’re a kid, that’s wonderful, isn’t it? You think that’s love. But you need somebody to listen to you too. You need someone who cares.’ She gave another little laugh that had no joy in it whatsoever, as if she was just coming to terms with the true nature of her mother at last. ‘I once tried to talk to her about a boy I’d fallen in love with, but she changed the conversation around to when she’d first fallen in love, so I just gave up.’
Esther picked up Evie’s hands again.
‘But you’re a good listener,’ Evie told her.
‘There’s not much else for me to do these days,’ Esther said.
‘Did you used to listen to your daughter?’
Esther looked confused. ‘Of course,’ she said. ‘We used to talk for hours.’
‘Hours?’ Evie said incredulously.
‘Oh, yes.’ Esther’s eyes misted over as she remembered. ‘We used to go for really long walks along the river, chattering away about everything and nothing. Mostly nothing. I really wish I could remember what it was we talked about, but my memory isn’t so good these days.’
‘I can’t even begin to imagine what that must be like,’ Evie said. ‘I mean, I can for you, but I can’t imagine that with me and my mum.’
Esther didn’t say anything but her face seemed to speak volumes and, all of a sudden, Evie was crying.
‘Come here,’ Esther said, putting her arms around Evie as she leaned towards her. ‘I’m here and I’ll listen to anything you want to tell me.’
Down in the kitchen, Lukas was pacing.
‘It was my fault,’ he said. ‘I should never have let her go up that stupid ladder!’
‘It wasn’t your fault,’ Celeste told him.
‘No,’ Gertie agreed. ‘Once Evie sets her mind
to something, nothing and nobody can stop her.’
‘Well, at least she’s okay,’ Celeste said. ‘This evening could have ended in a trip to hospital if she’d fallen. What’s bothering me now is what Esther is doing up there. Why did Evie ask for her?’
Gertie shook her head. ‘I have no idea.’
‘She’s not said anything to you about Esther, has she?’
‘No. Not a word,’ Gertie said. ‘I just thought she was giving Esther’s rooms the once over each week and then giving her a wide berth, but something’s obviously going on.’
Celeste stopped pacing and took a sip of her brandy. Part of her wanted to march up the stairs and find out exactly what was going on between Evie and Esther, but she had to admit that she was still a little afraid of the old woman. But hadn’t Evie been afraid of her too?
‘What on earth is going on?’ Celeste asked, but nobody had an answer for her.
25.
The sound coming from Ludkin and Son at work in the north wing was ear-splittingly loud. Celeste, who’d got up even earlier than normal after finding it impossible to sleep after the whole Evie and Esther thing, had tried to muffle the noise with earplugs and block it out with the radio before finally giving up and leaving the study. Frinton, who’d so far managed to snore his way through the whole morning, left the study, too, with high hopes that his mistress would be heading outside. There was a half-eaten rabbit down by the river which would probably smell even more interesting today, and he was desperate to get back to it.
They were just entering the hallway when Celeste saw Evie.
‘Evie!’ she called. ‘Wait a minute.’
Evie stopped by the barometer which read ‘Change.’ Again. Perhaps it was stuck, Celeste thought, remembering Julian’s offer to have it fixed. But she didn’t have time to worry about the barometer right now.
‘Hey! Are you feeling okay?’ she asked her pale-faced sister.
‘I’m fine,’ Evie said.
‘Are you sure?’ Celeste didn’t look convinced. She’d popped her head round the door of her sister’s bedroom after Esther had finally left but Evie had been asleep. Or pretending to be asleep – she couldn’t be sure. ‘I was so worried about you,’ she told her now. ‘We all were.’
The Rose Girls Page 21