“What kind of joke is that?” Emma said out loud, then she heard the small sound, and her gaze was dropping to the floor. In the padded basket, something was moving. Something white, furry and…
“Oh my God.” She dropped to her knees and picked up the kitten, amazed at how light and tiny it was. Emma couldn’t quite make sense of the scene, but there was one thing that was for sure. “Let’s get you inside real quick, because there’s no way I’m giving you back.” It had to be Kitty and Daniel’s idea, right? No one else would be so crazy as to put this tiny being in front of her door…but she’d never told Kitty or Daniel about that dream. She had only told one person.
“I had the hope that with her help, I could bribe you into letting me in,” Jayce said ruefully.
“You…you are crazy. You already got me the job, for which I’m thankful, and I’m sorry I never called, but this is too much. I can’t—”
“Please, don’t freak out. I’ve got a litter box and food in the car. Just to get you started.”
Emma didn’t know what to say without digging herself deeper, so she stood, clutching the kitten, staring at Jayce while she was trying to figure out what was happening.
“There’s something else I wanted to talk to you about. You could have your case reopened, clear your name. Daniel knows someone who could help us with that. Emma, I know I told you some lies, but I had to, for your protection.” Jayce laughed unhappily. “Which didn’t work out so well after all. Asking Kitty for a favor was no big deal. I just wanted you to know…what I said about the accident and the time after, that was real, and everything between us was real too. I wanted to stay away from you, but I couldn’t.”
Emma knew she was at a threshold, in more than one sense. She could simply step back and resume her old ways, looking over her shoulder, running scared. She could do the opposite.
The fantasy had kept her going on some days, during her prison sentence, when she’d felt like there was no more reason to go on—the life she could have one day, working, a living space that allowed her the privacy she’d longed for, a pet and just maybe, someone she could be close to without feeling smothered. In her fantasy, that person had been shadowy and faceless. Not any longer.
“Can I come in?” Jayce asked softly.
“Merry Christmas,” Emma said, holding the door open, her heart beating faster with the decision made, and all it implied. “What’s her name?”
“Elvis.”
“What? She’s a girl. Oh—I get it. As in Jailhouse Rock?”
Jayce looked mortified. “I swear that thought never crossed my mind. Love Me Tender was on the radio when I came here.”
“I can do that.”
The smile that lit up Jayce’s face told Emma that opening doors on Christmas day was a good idea—even sometimes, against better judgment.
2. Familiar Places
The sky didn’t fall.
Almost three months after leaving the halfway house, Emma still worked at Kitty’s Greeting Cards & Stationary, she lived in the same small but cozy apartment, and Jayce kept coming around. It was much better than she’d ever imagined, almost too good to be true which was why that bit of nagging worry always remained. Part of it was caution that had served her well in the past years, in prison and the subsequent months in the halfway home. The other part was naked fear that one simple turn of events could send her life into a tailspin once more.
At the moment, it didn’t look that way—Jayce had come by in the late afternoon, and they’d had dinner together after catching up on each other’s day and week. Curled up on the couch next to Jayce, she smiled, remembering details of the catching up that made her regret she had to sleep alone tonight. Jayce was about to leave for an all night stakeout, except she seemed just as comfortable as Emma.
“I guess I really have to go,” she murmured against Emma’s neck before reluctantly moving to get up. “At least, this will be over soon. No more nights for a while.”
Emma didn’t ask. For one, she was still somewhat distracted. She didn’t inquire more about Jayce’s work than she was willing to share. It was safer for both of them, easier to forget it was because of Jayce’s work that they had met in the first place.
“Thank God,” she said. She got up as well to walk Jayce to the door, Elvis leaving her place in her favorite chair to follow them and brush against their legs. She didn’t want Jayce to leave either, though in her case, it was probably about the treats Jayce brought her on a regular basis. “Do you have plans for Friday night? We could have dinner again.” Sometimes, Emma still couldn’t determine if she sounded hopeful or desperate, making suggestions like this. They spent time together on a regular basis, as much as their respective schedules allowed. They were dating. At some point she’d have to get over her doubts.
“Friday is fine, but can I take you out?” Jayce asked. “I’d like you to meet some friends of mine.”
“That would be nice,” Emma said a tad too quickly.
“Are you sure?”
“Yes, it’s fine. You’re going to be late.”
“I know.” Jayce turned to her to kiss her, deeply, and for a moment, Emma forgot all her reservations regarding aforementioned friends. They came back to her as soon as Jayce had left, and Emma walked back into her living room that now felt too empty and claustrophobic at the same time.
She had done everything she could to move on from a disastrous relationship that had ended with both Emma and her ex in prison, caught the lucky break she’d dreamed of during those never ending days. That didn’t mean everything was bright and easy now. Emma wasn’t worried about history repeating itself, like when she first started hanging out with Maxine’s friends, neglecting her own more and more, because Maxine was jealous and slowly isolating her.
Jayce wasn’t that kind of person. Emma knew it for certain. Not just because she was a cop. Even in her undercover persona, when they’d met at the halfway house, Jayce had been kind. The problem was, most of her friends were cops too. After Jayce’s last case, some of them had to know about Emma, her record, the sentence she’d served.
What they didn’t know was how much Emma still wished she could turn back time. If she had found out about Maxine’s plans, if she had been able to deter her…There was no point in going back there. She couldn’t undo what had happened.
She could only cling to this brighter future with everything she had.
Emma was so deeply lost in thought that the sound of the telephone made her jump, which, in turn, made Elvis jump.
“Sorry about that,” she muttered to the kitten and went to pick up. “Hello?”
There was a long pause. “Hello?” she tried again, shaking her head. “I guess not.”
“Emma, is that you?” an unfamiliar voice asked a split-second before she had the chance to hang up.
“Who is this?”
“I don’t know if you remember me. My name is Deirdre. I’m…”
“Maxine’s sister,” Emma said, as the world faded out for a brief, disturbing moment. “What do you want?” Wrong. She should have ended the call. Emma remembered Deirdre from the trial, and she didn’t think anything good could come out of this interaction. Maxine had screwed her over. There was nothing else to the story.
“I heard you’re out. I was hoping we could talk.”
“Who told you?”
Deirdre didn’t answer her question. “Maxine keeps asking about you. So—I wanted to see how you are.”
“That’s none of Maxine’s business, or yours.”
“Come on, after all these years, you still want to put all of this on her?”
This was going exactly into the direction Emma had feared it would. She had to remind herself that this time, she had options. One of them was not to listen any longer. “All of this is on her. I’m sorry, I can’t do this. Don’t call again.”
She went back to the couch, Elvis following closely, sensing that Emma was upset. She turned on the TV but didn’t pay attention to the
program. How had Deirdre found out about her, and why did she even care? Why did Maxine care?
Fear made her stomach clench suddenly and painfully. Maxine wasn’t going to get out anytime soon, was she? No one had ever doubted Maxine had pulled the trigger.
Maybe she could ask Jayce to check for her, but then she would have to tell her about Deirdre’s call. Emma would rather forget about it. Especially when she was about to meet friends of hers, she didn’t want to remind Jayce of the past. This didn’t have to mean anything. Deirdre and Maxine were trying to mess with her, nothing new there.
This time, she wouldn’t let them.
It was still early, but Emma decided to turn in anyway. She had worked longer hours lately, as one of her co-workers kept cancelling her shifts, and there was some decorating for the next holiday to do.
Being around so many happy wishes and brightly colored paper would do her some good. She had to make it to Friday night.
Consoled by those thoughts, Emma curled up in the sheets they had shared earlier. Her life was back on track. It wasn’t just her imagination.
* * * *
There were a couple of more calls in the morning before Emma had even finished her coffee, Deirdre’s voice sounding pleading and urgent on the voicemail. Spooked, she left fresh food and water for Elvis and then fled her apartment.
She had already filled a box with paper hearts and roses by the time her boss Kitty arrived.
“Oh, good, at least someone is taking this seriously. It looks like Samantha is not coming in this week—at all.”
“I can do Saturday if you like.” The words were out of Emma’s mouth before she remembered that she’d made plans for Friday night which, she’d hoped, would include sleeping in on Saturday. Jayce would understand though. Emma was well aware that Samantha thought she was cozying up to the boss. Her co-worker didn’t realize how happy Emma was to have this job, and how important it was to her to keep Kitty happy. The other girl who took care of the online store didn’t seem to have an opinion yet.
“Are you sure?” Kitty sighed. “That would be great. I don’t know what’s up with her lately. If she told me anything at least…We might be friends, but she’s still officially on the payroll, so it would be nice if she showed up once in a while.” She took a look around. “Wow, but you’ve been busy. When did you get here?”
Emma shrugged. “About an hour ago, I think.”
“Everything okay? You look tired.”
“Sorry. I stayed up a little too long.”
“Hm.” Kitty gave her a speculative grin. “Can I ask?”
“No, you can’t,” Emma said, relieved that the conversation was going into safer waters. Kitty’s friendly curiosity about the state of her relationship with Jayce she could handle. “Are we doing St. Patrick’s Day or heading straight to Easter?”
Kitty laughed. “All right, I get it. Let’s do St. Patrick’s—we might not have a parade, but everyone can use a little luck. I, for one, am very lucky you came to work for me. I’d like to make it up to you though if I have to keep you here on the weekend again. Why don’t you and Jayce come over for dinner on Sunday?”
This was the old, new normal, before and after Maxine: A regular job, paying the rent, dinner with friends every now and then.
“I’d love to. I assume if Daniel is there, Jayce will have time too.”
Daniel, Kitty’s husband, was Jayce’s partner at work, and the four of them had had dinner a couple of times before. When confronted with it in small doses, Emma was fine with Jayce’s work environment. Daniel and Kitty had arranged for her to work at the store, and they knew the whole story. They wouldn’t judge her.
“Yeah. Let’s hope they will want to spend any more time together after this week.”
They shared a smile, both of them having listened to their respective lovers complain about boring stakeouts for a few days now. There was something else they didn’t need to say out loud, Emma thought. Boring stakeouts were good. Boring stakeouts meant no flying bullets.
Once opening hours started, Emma was busy advising customers on the most appropriate choice of greeting cards for all occasions, selling pens and stationary. While this wasn’t the career she had envisioned at one point in her life, she was grateful to be working here—not just because it was a job to pay the rent, or because Kitty was the most easygoing boss she’d ever had. The people who came in mostly had something to celebrate, a happy story. Weddings, birthdays, Valentine’s…There was the occasional condolences card, but even those customers meant to show another person they cared. The pay wasn’t outrageous, but it was enough, and Samantha’s increasing absences had put more money into Emma’s bank account.
She had sold a card to the proud grandmother of a girl who had passed her driving test on the third attempt when Kitty came in from the office, her expression serious.
“Emma? There’s a phone call for you. It sounds important…You can go in the office. I can take over here for a bit.”
“Thanks.” Emma’s heart sank. It couldn’t be…right? There was no way Deirdre could have found out where she worked, except…She had found Emma’s phone number already. Emma had no hope that this could be anyone else, because everyone she cared for—Jayce, Kitty and Daniel—was accounted for.
“What the hell are you doing?” she asked, more resigned and scared than angry when she picked up the phone. “I told you not to call anymore.”
“I have no choice. I need to ask you a favor…and I need to talk to you in person.”
“No!”
Emma leaned on the wooden desk, desperately needing something to anchor herself in the present. Everything would be okay. She didn’t have to do anything Deirdre told her.
“Emma, please, don’t be like that. You’re out. You have a life. Maxine will be locked away for a long time to come, so you could do me that favor at least. It hasn’t been easy for any of us.”
There were many things Emma could have said to her about how nothing had been easy for her from the moment Maxine came into her life. All she could do was sink into Kitty’s leather chair and try to breathe, her eyes welling up with emotion, guilty relief. Maxine wasn’t going to get out. Thank God.
“I still have no idea what we could have to talk about. I don’t want you to tell Maxine anything about me. If you need money, I don’t have any.”
“Look, I know you’re still pissed at Maxine, but I’m telling you, she had a lot of time to think about what happened. I’ll come by tonight. You have it good now, Emma. It won’t hurt you to be decent to someone who’s not that lucky.”
This time, it was Deirdre who hung up on her. Emma sat in the same place, staring into nothing for several minutes, trying to get a grip on her emotions, drawn back into memories that were never far behind. She had worked so hard to stay under the radar after the unthinkable happened—in prison, and in the halfway house. Without a doubt, some people had higher odds stacked against them. Maybe she should hear Deirdre out, if for nothing else, then for good karma. Emma didn’t want to.
“Are you okay?”
“Yes, I’m fine. I’m so sorry about that. I told her not to call at work.” She jumped to her feet and went past her boss, back to the store. Kitty followed her, locking the front door.
“What are you doing?”
“We are going to lunch,” Kitty said, “and you’re going to tell me what you’re so worried about. You hardly ever take any breaks. It’s okay to receive a call at work, especially when it’s urgent.”
“I…I really don’t want to talk about it.” Emma laughed unhappily. “It makes me feel like I’m jinxing everything. That sounds crazy, doesn’t it?”
“Now I’m worried,” Kitty admitted. “Who was that?”
“Don’t tell Jayce. Deirdre is my ex’s sister.”
“Is she harassing you?”
“No…no, not really,” Emma stumbled through the half lie. “She wants to talk, make amends maybe, I don’t know. I guess I’m not that good a
person, because I don’t feel very forgiving.”
Kitty regarded her with affection. “If you ask me, there’s nothing you owe to anybody here, just the opposite. You should tell Jayce.”
“Yes, maybe. I will,” Emma added though she had no intention to do so. She couldn’t risk Kitty taking matters into her own hands.
“Good. Now let’s go eat. I’m starving,” Kitty declared, laying an arm around Emma’s shoulders. “Don’t worry. Everything will be fine.”
Emma didn’t mean to be petty and jaded, but she couldn’t help thinking, I heard that one before.
* * * *
“God, I can’t wait for it to be Friday,” Jayce exclaimed, for the umpteenth time trying to find a comfortable position in the passenger seat. After all those hours, tonight, the nights before, it wasn’t going to happen. She was tired of waiting for their elusive suspect to show up, doubting he would anytime soon. Somebody might have tipped him off. He was probably long gone—but as a long as Lieutenant Chomsky thought the parents’ house was still worth watching, they would be here for a while longer, until Thursday, starting again on Monday. Not that she minded those delightful afternoons spent at Emma’s apartment, but she would have liked to go back to a more regular schedule soon. Her muscles cramped from being cooped up in the narrow space, and her sleep cycle was as messed up as ever.
Well, the latter could have been from the musings that kept her up…Jayce was happy and in love these days, which was nothing short of amazing. As far as she was concerned, they still had a long way ahead. Emma had a good case if she wanted to sue for the injustice that had happened to her, and clear her record. Jayce had conferred with a lawyer who was a friend of hers, ready to get started whenever Emma wanted to…The problem was Emma tended to evade the subject as soon as Jayce brought it up.
“Something tells me you’ve had a pretty good week already.”
She made a face. “Stop it right there.”
Jayce & Emma Page 5