“Okay, tiger, Momma says that we have to calm down some. So what do you say we sit right here and have some dinner?” Rayne smiled at Ben. “Hey, say hello to Eunice. She’s our new friend.”
Ben buried a shy smile in Rayne’s shoulder, his pudgy little finger in his mouth.
“Hello, sweetie,” Eunice said softly.
Ben pulled his head away from the shoulder; his blue eyes sparkled, as he smiled and looked at Eunice. With his wet finger, he reached out and touched Eunice’s cheek and quietly said, “Lo.”
With a laugh, Eunice said, “What a sweetheart.”
“Yes, he is at the moment; but trust me, he is a handful the rest of the time.” Lisbet’s smile showed the pride and love she felt towards her family.
“Ain’t that the truth.” Rayne placed the boy in his high chair. “Come on sit, the stew’s gettin' cold.” She nodded at a chair and took her seat.
Eunice looked around at the family who had opened their door to her and, for a moment, felt a pang of regret. A part of her ached at the fact that she didn’t have children; but given how her life had turned out, it was probably for the best that the good Lord hadn’t seen fit to allow her any so far. Maybe when she settled in Telluride.
Lisbet dished up bowls of the stew, slices of bread, and glasses of cool water. Rayne offered a prayer of thanks for the food, their safety, and new friends. When she finished, they raised their heads and began to eat.
“So, Eunice, you said a little bit ago that you’re headin’ to Colorado to meet up with your husband. Mind if I ask what he does for a livin’?” Rayne asked.
“Harry is going to mine silver and gold. He won the claim to a mine there in Telluride, so he and Robert are heading there soon to set up their operation.” Eunice looked at her bowl, then at Ben, but she wouldn’t meet Rayne or Lisbet’s eyes.
What am I doing? These people opened up their home to me, and here I am lying to them.
“Rayne, I don’t think you should pry into Eunice’s business. If she wants to tell us she will.” Lisbet’s tone was sharp.
“Lisbet, I was just makin’ conversation is all.”
“Oh no, please, she isn’t prying at all,” Eunice said quickly.
“Where are you originally from?” Rayne asked.
Eunice chuckled at the look she saw Lisbet flash Rayne. She remembered that look fondly from her childhood. It was the one her mother would give her when she was getting out of hand. She even gave something akin to that look to Harry from time to time.
“San Antonio actually, that’s where I met Harry,” Eunice replied.
“Lots of cattle out that way.” Rayne nodded.
“Yes, there are. Harry had actually thought of starting a cattle ranch at one time.”
“Oh? I take it by the fact that he is starting a mining operation that he didn’t, how come?” Rayne asked.
“Oh, he just found something that caught his interest more, I suppose,” Eunice said.
She thought about the real reason his cattle ranch never came to fruition. Mentally shaking herself from her thoughts, Eunice smiled. “This stew is so good. I can’t tell you how much I appreciate your hospitality. I was looking at a dark barn, a biscuit, and some jerky otherwise.”
Lisbet gave a half smile and mumbled a thank you. Rayne reached over and wiped Ben’s mouth. “Okay pal, you’re done. You’ve started playin’ so come on, let’s get you cleaned up and get you calmed down for bed. What do ya say?”
“Tory mama. Tory peas.” Ben reached his chubby arms to Rayne.
“Well of course, I’ll read you a story. But let’s clean up first.” Rayne lifted up her son. “Sorry, when he gets like this it’s impossible to get him back to eating,” she apologized to the guest.
“It’s not a problem, really, I taught school for a while, so I know how kids can be,” Eunice smiled at the boy in Rayne’s arms.
“You’re a teacher?” Lisbet asked.
“Yes, I was. Then I met Harry, and well, he didn’t want me to continue, so I resigned and then he decided to go and get itchy feet and…well, here I am on my way out west.”
“Do you miss it?” she asked.
“Sometimes, I do. You get used to having little kids around, hearing their voices, the way they talk, the way they just accept people for how they are with no judgment.” She tried to stay in the present and not go to the place where she heard snippets of comments made about her or saw people turn to avoid her or speak behind their hands.
Lisbet couldn’t help but notice how Eunice withdrew and the look in her eyes that Lisbet clearly remembered from her own childhood. She wondered what it was that Eunice was remembering, what it was that she was running from. It doesn’t matter, who am I to judge? She knew the world was a cruel place if you didn’t behave or live a certain way. Take for example her and Rayne, she knew in the eyes of some people their love was wrong and they should be run out of town or hung from the nearest tree. She simply nodded. “Yes, they do. I know our lives were completely changed the moment Ben came to us.”
“Please, don’t think I’m prying, but it’s obvious you and Rayne aren’t sisters… Do you mind if I ask…” Eunice paused, not sure how to ask what she already suspected.
“Rayne and I live our life as a married couple. I’m hopin’ that doesn’t change your opinion of us,” Lisbet said in a defensive manner.
“It isn’t up to me to judge how others live their lives,” Eunice replied. “You said when Ben came into your lives… Ben isn’t Rayne’s son?”
“We are raisin’ him as ours, but he is her nephew. He was six months old when he came to live with us. It’s a long story. When the family showed up here, Ben’s mother had passed away, and his father wasn’t far behind. Jason died about twelve hours after he showed up,” Lisbet said, as she went about gathering their dishes.
“And he is what, about three years old?”
“Yes, feels like he’s always been a part of our lives. Rayne adores him, and he obviously adores her.” Lisbet smiled.
“And they both adore you,” Eunice commented, as she stood and started to help clean up. “How long have you and Rayne been… No, don’t answer that, I shouldn’t pry,” Eunice quickly said, as she saw Lisbet pause for a split second.
“You aren’t. Rayne and I don’t hide what we are, least not in our home, but we don’t flaunt it either. So when someone asks out of the blue like that, I’m caught by surprise. We’ve been together about three years. Most folks in town know about us, and help keep our secret with those that don’t.”
Eunice smiled as she thought about her time with Harry. Then the smile slowly faded. She loved him, and while she was happy with life, she sometimes just wished for a little more. What was wrong with wanting a home in one place? Not always feeling the need to explore different places and always running off. Just once, she would like to feel that Harry was happy just being with her.
“Are you all right?” Lisbet asked.
“Yeah, I’m just tired. Long few days, you know?”
“I’m sorry, I should have thought about that. Sit, you don’t have to help. Go sit by the fire and relax. I’ll bring you some coffee.”
Eunice nodded and smiled, then walked to the living area and sat on the sofa. Eunice could hear Rayne in the background as she told a story to Ben. As she listened, her eyes closed. It wasn’t long before she was asleep.
Chapter Two
Lisbet stood at the kitchen window, watching Rayne pace back and forth along the fenced corral, stop and stare out over the prairie, then pace some more. In the week since Eunice appeared at their barn, Lisbet had watched Rayne grow increasingly fidgety. With a soft sigh, she pushed away from the sink and walked out the door to where Rayne stood.
“What are you thinkin’ about, sweetheart?” Lisbet asked, as she approached Rayne, who was staring out over the prairie.
“Nothin’ really. Where’s Eunice?” Rayne replied.
“She’s playin’ with Ben. I’m amazed at how
quickly he took a likin’ to her. I’m worried at how he’s gonna handle it when she finally leaves.” Lisbet leaned against the fence and cocked her head to the side, looking at her spouse.
“Oh, I’m sure he’ll be fine. He’s resilient ya know.” Rayne’s eyes still focused on the prairie. She sighed. “These damned storms need to stop; they’re makin’ the plantin’ down right miserable.”
“It ain’t the rain that’s buggin’ you. So, why don’t you just get it off your chest?” Lisbet folded her arms.
“I think it’s time to expand. We’ve talked about it before, what do you think?”
“Depends on where you want to expand to. I think expandin’ around here is a good idea, and I ain’t got a problem with that. What I ain’t wild about is expandin’ out west.”
“It ain’t like I’m crazy about the idea of leavin’ you and Ben for any length of time. Ya know that. But dammit, Lisbet, from all I hear, Colorado is filled with prime cattle land just ripe for the takin’.”
“You ain’t gonna let this go, are ya?” Lisbet turned and looked out at the open prairie that held Rayne’s gaze.
Rayne turned to the shorter woman who stood beside her. She saw the pain in her eyes and could hear it in her voice. She looked away again. “Lisbet, you know how much land is goin’ for around these parts, and it ain’t even prime. If we’re gonna expand, it makes sense to make sure that whatever land we buy is damned good and will be able to handle the herds we put on it. From what I’m hearin’, land there in Colorado is cheap. Hun, I mean, it’s worth a look, don’t ya think?” Rayne spoke softly, as she once again turned her gaze to the blonde woman who had captured her heart when she didn’t realize she still had a heart to be captured.
Tears glistened in Lisbet’s eyes. “When you thinkin’ of leavin’, and how long you plannin’ on bein’ gone?”
“I ain’t sure. I suppose the sooner I can get goin’ the sooner I can get things started there. I’ll be needin’ to talk with Tom and Mark, get somethin’ set up so’s the operation here keeps goin’ and you ain’t got nothing added to your chores. The ranch is doin’ good right now, and John is more than capable of seein’ to the day to day matters. I think things here will be fine. My main concern is you and Ben.”
Lisbet wiped a tear away. “I don’t see how runnin’ to someplace in Colorado shows that concern right now.” She pushed away from the fence and briskly walked away.
“Wait,” Rayne called out. Lisbet didn’t stop, and Rayne simply watched her walk back to the house.
Eunice looked up from her spot on the floor, where she had been playing with Ben and his blocks, to see Lisbet wiping tears from her eyes as she briskly walked to the bedroom and closed the door. Eunice quietly said to Ben, who looked up at his momma as she closed the door, “Why don’t you stay right here while I check on your momma, hmm? How about you build a nice big castle okay? I’ll be right back, sweetheart.” Eunice stood up, walked to the closed door, and gently knocked.
“Yes?”
“Lisbet, is everything okay?” she asked, as she opened the door.
“Eunice, I really don’t want to talk about it right now, but thank you for checkin’ on me.” Lisbet wiped her eyes.
“I know you don’t know me well, but I’m a good listener and…well, I feel…both you and Rayne have opened your home to me, and I want to return your kindness.”
“I’m sorry Eunice, it’s…I just don’t know what to do. Rayne wants to head to Colorado and expand. I don’t know what Colorado is like, what dangers are there, oh God… I can’t imagine life without her,” Lisbet said from the bed where she sat.
“I understand why you would be afraid, and I doubt there is anything I can say that would change your mind. The truth is Colorado is untamed, it’s wild. Crikey, it’s the west, but someday it will be civilized. The few that help tame it can, I’d imagine, have a fortune at their feet. Do you really want to keep Rayne from that?” Eunice leaned against the door she had just walked through.
“I don’t, but why can’t she have that here? This ranch is doin’ just fine, we got a nice sized herd, and we’re gettin’ by just fine.”
“I understand you feel that way, but I’m not so sure Rayne does.” Eunice pushed away from the door and turned the doorknob. There really wasn’t anything else she could say. If Lisbet wanted to talk about it more, she would. In silence, Eunice walked back to the sitting room where Ben sat playing with his toys.
It was almost thirty minutes later that Rayne opened the door. Eunice looked up at the entrance and smiled as Rayne stepped in. Rayne hung up her hat, looked over at the two and beamed when Ben turned in her direction. She walked over to him and kneeled down beside him. “Hey there, tiger, what are ya buildin’? Oh! Would ya look at that, ain’t it a beauty?” Rayne nodded towards the closed door. “She in the bedroom?”
“Yes, she is, and she’s really upset.”
“Yup, I know.” Rayne stood up with a sigh. She walked to the door and gently tapped before entering.
Rayne closed the door behind her and leaned against it. “Lisbet, I don’t know what you want me to say.”
“I want you to say that you’ll stay here and forget this fool idea of expandin’ into Colorado. I want you to say that you’re happy with everythin’ we have here, with our life here.” Lisbet wiped away a tear as it fell.
Rayne walked farther into the room with her hands in her pockets. “Lisbet, of course I love our life and everythin’ in it. Is it so wrong to want absolutely everythin’ for my family? That I don’t want you or Ben to have to ever worry about money? I’m sorry, but I don’t think it is.”
“No, of course not. I just don’t know why you have to do that from some godforsaken place in Colorado.” Lisbet twisted the hankie she held in her hands.
Rayne pinched the bridge of her nose. “At one time this place was considered godforsaken. Look at it now. California was the same way, and Colorado will follow suit. I think the Rockin M should be part of its history. Lisbet, I want Ben to be a doctor or a lawyer…oh hell, the president even. Somethin’ other than a rancher or a farmer. Somethin’ he ain’t gonna be breakin’ his back at just to make ends meet. That means a good education; and that means college, which is expensive.” Rayne leaned against the dresser, her eyes on the green-eyed blonde who sat on the bed.
With a snort Lisbet replied, “I’m well aware that colleges are expensive, and of course, I want the same things for him. I just don’t happen to agree with where you think you have to be to earn that money. Look, I realize you’ve already made the decision to go and nothin’ I say is gonna change your mind. Just give me that I have, at least, the right to be upset.”
“Of course you got that right, hun. Just trust that I won't do anythin’ to put my life in jeopardy. Sweetheart, I got too much to come back to.” Rayne pushed herself off the dresser and walked to Lisbet. “I waited too long to have all this, you, Ben. I ain’t gonna throw it away,” she finished as she knelt in front of the smaller woman.
“It ain't about trust Rayne. It's about you goin’ off to a place that’s wild and filled with people who don't understand people like you and me, a place filled with Lord only knows what. You better come back to us. You hear me?”
“Always,” Rayne whispered softly.
Lisbet cleared her throat and wiped at her eyes. “I suppose I should get supper on the table. You'll be wantin’ to see to the horses.”
Rayne gave a slight nod and stood. “Yup, unless it rains again tonight, I'm hopin’ to get some plantin’ done tomorrow. So, they'll need their strength. Lisbet…”
“I know, we'll be fine,” the smaller woman finished Rayne's sentence and walked to the door of the bedroom, opened it, and walked out.
Supper that evening was a quiet affair. Although Rayne tried to engage in conversation with Lisbet and lighten the mood, Lisbet wasn't having any of it. Answers were kept to a bare minimum. Once everyone was done, she was up and clearing away the dishes and washing the
m.
†
Eunice played with Ben and kept him occupied, while Rayne sat at her desk going over ledgers and scribbling out plans for her upcoming trip.
It was hours later that Rayne looked up with blurred eyes and realized she was alone. With the house quiet, she closed her eyes. Never had she dreamt she could be so happy. She had everything she’d ever hoped for. Someone she loved with all her heart and a happy and healthy toddler running around. She had a thriving ranch and good friends who were always there to lend a hand when needed. Was it a mistake to hope for the same in a different place?
Maybe Lisbet was right; maybe she was gambling it all away. No, her heart told her she was making the right move. With a sigh, she whispered to herself, “No one ever said life was easy.” She closed her ledgers and tucked away her notes, then reached for the lantern and turned the light down before standing and stretching. She made sure the fire had enough wood to keep them warm through the slight chill of the early morning hours and headed for the bedroom.
†
Rayne slipped into bed quietly. She pulled the blankets over herself and Lisbet, leaning close to gently place a kiss on the creamy shoulder, even as her hand moved to the soft curve of Lisbet's hip. Her lips dropped more tender kisses along the soft shoulder and neck.
Lisbet rolled over, her hands moving to the woman's shoulders. “Rayne” she whispered and caught her bottom lip between her teeth. Her eyes locked with Rayne’s, and a sigh escaped her lips as a tear fell from the corner of her eye.
Rayne reached over and gently wiped the tear away. “Maybe you're right. Maybe I'm bein' foolish; my place is here with you and Ben. We have a good life, the ranch thrives. I don’t need to be runnin’ off anywhere.”
With a growl, Lisbet responded, “God, Rayne. Don't do this. If you wanna go, go, but don't look to me to make that decision for you. No, I don't want you to go for Lord knows how long, but I'm not gonna make you stay either. I will, however, be here waitin’ for you to come get us. So you better hurry up and make all these plans happen.” Lisbet pulled Rayne’s head down towards hers and claimed the warm lips.
Faith in Rayne Page 2