by SJ West
“Of course.” Lucian places a hand on my shoulder and phases us.
I instantly find myself standing in an apartment on a high floor in one of the buildings in New York. All of the exterior walls are made of glass, and the furnishings are minimalistic in color and detail, but everything looks functional enough.
“This is a penthouse suite,” Lucian tells me as he drops his hand away from my shoulder, “so you’re welcome to access the roof in case you want to sit outside for some fresh air. There’s a pool up there and a seating area as well. If you’re hungry, the kitchen is fully stocked, but if you need something in particular, just call down to the front desk and tell them to get whatever you need. I normally use this apartment for special lady friends who visit me in the city, so no one will question your stay here.”
“Are you famous on this Earth?” I ask. “The shopkeeper acted like you were someone important here.”
“That’s because Lucian Forester is an actor.” Lucian grins cockily. “I’m currently starring in the number-one movie playing in theaters, and I’m the star of a very popular Broadway show, which is why I’m in New York right now. I suppose fate wanted to make sure I would be close by during your visit.”
“I suppose,” I say, even though I’ve never believed in coincidences. “Well, thank you for letting us use your home. I think we could use some time alone, if you don’t mind.”
“Of course.” Lucian’s gaze briefly lowers to look at Lucas, who is still clinging to my waist. “I’ll come back tomorrow. As I told you before, Ivy wants to meet you. I can take you to her in the morning if you think you’ll be up for it.”
“We’ll see,” I say apathetically.
Lucian doesn’t look pleased with my response, but he says, “Very well. Take your time to think about it. Have a good evening.”
After Lucian leaves, I pry Lucas’ arms from around my waist.
“You’re safe now,” I gripe. “For someone so young, you sure do have a strong grip.”
“I was scared,” Lucas confesses, taking a step back from me.
“I wouldn’t have let him hurt you,” I say. “Like I told you before, I need to keep you alive if we’re ever going to get back to our own Earth.”
“Are you always so selfish?” he asks, not being judgmental, exactly. He looks more curious to know the answer than anything else.
“Yes,” I say truthfully. “I’m the most important person to myself. Why wouldn’t I be selfish?”
“That’s just weird to me. My parents always tell me I need to think about other people’s feelings.”
“What’s the point in doing that?”
“To be nice.”
“Being nice is overrated. Most humans like people who take charge of situations, not constantly asking them what they would like. A good leader tells other people what they should do and the way they should think.”
“That’s not true.”
“You’re six years old! How would you know what traits a good leader should have? Plus, you’ve been sheltered all your life. You know absolutely nothing about the world or the people in it.”
“I know you should treat others the way you want them to treat you.”
“Oh, good grief, did you really just spout the Golden Rule to me? If ever there was a rule that needs to be broken as often as possible, it’s that one.”
“Why are you so mad all the time?”
“Because humans like you aggravate me beyond all reason. You think if you treat someone the way you want to be treated, it will make everything all right. Well, I hate to break it to you, my little angel, but it does not. There are people in this world who will take advantage of your kindness. They would just as soon use you for their own purposes and toss you aside once they’ve gotten what they want from you. You need to learn how to look out for the most important person in your life: yourself. If you don’t, every beggar in the world will come knocking at your door asking for a handout.”
“You’re supposed to help people who are less fortunate,” Lucas tells me. “My dad is always saying that most people are willing to work for a better life. You just have to give them the chance.”
“No. Most people want a handout,” I reply. “They don’t want to work to make their lives better. They want you to do all the work and give them what they feel entitled to. One of these days, you’ll understand the fundamental truth that most humans are naturally lazy. That laziness will eventually lead to their downfall.”
“There’s just no talking to you,” Lucas says with a shake of his head, as if I’m a lost cause.
“Are you hungry?” I ask, deciding to change the subject before I become angry. “I’m feeling a bit peckish. Let’s see what’s in the kitchen to eat.”
I walk out of the living room to the adjoining kitchen area. I have to say, I don’t like how modern everything is in Lucian’s abode. It feels sterile and lacks a certain je ne sais quoi. Most everything is white and steel. It’s not a style I can appreciate.
We find a stack of flat silver packets in the refrigerator that are labeled with what food they contain. We choose a few and place them into the rehydrating oven one at a time. The contents of each packet only take a few seconds to transform into the desired food. Within a few minutes, we have roasted chicken, baked potatoes, and yeast rolls.
For whatever reason, traveling to this Earth has made me extremely hungry. I begin to wonder if perhaps the food that was inside my stomach just didn’t make the trip with me. The way Lucas attacks his plate of food seems to indicate that he’s just as ravenous as I am. Then again, maybe it’s simply the excitement of it all that’s causing my appetite to pique.
Once we’re through eating, Lucas takes my plate and cleans it in the sink for me.
“Thank you,” I tell him as I watch him wash my dish.
“You’re welcome,” he replies. “Can I ask you something?”
“Go ahead,” I say cautiously.
“How are we going to find my mom and the others?”
Lucas glances away from his task to look at me when I don’t answer him right away.
“I’m not sure,” I reply. “They could be anywhere.”
“Maybe Lucian will help us. He seems to like you.”
“Do you really want him to find your mother or even know that she’s here?”
He thinks about this for a moment and finally says, “No. He might hurt her.”
“My thoughts exactly. That’s why I only told him about Lucifer being here. I’m sure Lucian is looking for him as we speak. All we need to do is wait for him to find Lucifer for us.”
“What if Lucifer doesn’t know where the others are either?”
“It doesn’t matter. If we have him, we can team up to find Anna and Jess. I suggest we give Lucian some time to prove his usefulness to us. He won’t be able to stop himself from looking for Lucifer.”
“Why is that?”
“Because he’s going to want to know if what I said is true.”
“That Lucifer asked God for forgiveness?”
“Yes. I’m not sure if he believed me when I told him that little gem. He’ll want to confirm it with Lucifer himself.”
“Do you think Lucian wants to ask God for forgiveness?”
“I’m sure there’s a part of him that wants to return to Heaven. I know Lucifer lived with the yearning since he was cast out by his father. I don’t see why this version of him would be any different.”
“This Lucifer isn’t like ours, though,” Lucas says. His words come out sounding oddly grown up for someone so young. I begin to wonder if Gabriel’s consciousness is beginning to blend with his.
“I agree. He’s very unstable. Lucifer may have lost all his marbles there at the end by asking his father for forgiveness, but he normally kept a level head. Lucian seems unbalanced, and I know I can’t trust him.”
Once Lucas places the clean dishes back on the shelf, he lets out a big yawn.
“Come on,” I tell him, walking ou
t of the kitchen and back toward the living room. “Let’s find the bedrooms. I think we could both use some rest.”
It isn’t hard to find the bedrooms. There are three of them down the main hallway leading off from the living room.
We find one with a large bed but very little in the way of other furnishings. While I turn down the bedding, Lucas removes his jacket and boots. He crawls underneath the covers, and I begin to walk away.
“Helena?” he calls out.
I turn back around and say, “Yes?”
“Would you sleep in here with me? I don’t want to be alone.”
“Nothing will harm you here.”
“How can you be so sure about that?”
It’s a good question. I can’t be sure Lucian won’t return and try to snatch Lucas away from me, or even worse, try to kill him for retribution. Gabe irrevocably destroyed his plans for this Earth. I’m sure he’s still holding a grudge about that. As I told Lucas earlier, Lucian doesn’t seem to think before he acts. It’s quite possible he would seek his revenge by ending Lucas’ life.
Without saying a word, I walk over to the other side of the bed, remove my shoes, and lie down on top of the comforter.
“Go to sleep,” I tell him. “I’m not sure what we’ll need to do tomorrow.”
Lucas doesn’t make a verbal reply. He simply closes his eyes and smiles.
He’s such an odd child. Who else would ask me to lie in bed with them for protection? I’m not exactly the mothering type. I don’t believe anyone would accuse me of being a nurturer.
I watch Lucas sleep for a while before I allow myself to close my eyes and try to sleep, too.
As I told him, I have no idea what the next day will bring on this alternate Earth. All I want to do is find the others and go back home. When the word “home” flashes through my mind, a picture of Cade forms in my thoughts. I instantly make it disperse, because thinking about him is a distraction I don’t need right now. Unfortunately, my plan doesn’t work. I begin to worry that he’s fallen into the purple veil surrounding the castle by now. To be honest, I’m not even sure if the fight is still progressing without me being there to control my minions. I’ve noticed that they sometimes need my unique power of persuasion to do their jobs effectively.
I turn over onto my back and force my mind to go blank. The less I worry about Cade, the better. He’s a War Angel, for goodness’ sake. He should be able to take care of himself.
“Hello.”
I quickly sit up and look at the woman now standing in the doorway. The bedroom is dark with the only light coming from the city through the large windows in the room, but I can see the woman clear enough in the dim lighting.
“Who are you?” I ask.
“I’ve gone by a lot of names in my life,” she says with an air of mystery. “I think the one you’ve probably heard before is Ravan Drake.”
I swing my legs over the bed’s edge and stand up. I walk over to the woman claiming to be Ravan until I’m only inches away from her. She’s young, possibly twenty-five, with pale skin and long strawberry blonde hair parted to the side. Her large blue-gray eyes watch me cautiously.
“How do I know you’re really her?” I ask. “You definitely don’t look the same.”
“It’s been a thousand years,” she answers with a small shrug. “I’ve occupied a lot of new bodies during that time.”
“I thought the Watchers here had you locked away in that prison cell of theirs. You know, the one you can’t phase out of.”
“They did for a time, but humans are weak-willed. I was able to talk one of them into letting me out.”
“I’m surprised the Watchers here haven’t hunted you down and killed you by now.”
“I’m sure they would have if they had been able to catch me.”
“You still haven’t answered my question. How do I know you’re the real Ravan Drake? Or should I call you Lilith, since that’s the original name God gave you?”
The woman claiming to be Ravan smiles. “Why would I lie about who I am?”
“Oh, I don’t know. To make a fool out of me?”
Before I can stop her, the woman grabs my arm and phases me somewhere I thought I would never be allowed to go.
Heaven.
Chapter 17
I’m rarely at a loss for words, but as I stand in Heaven beside Ravan, my mind goes totally blank. My heart begins to pound against the walls of my chest as if it’s trying to escape its boney confines. My breathing becomes rapid, making me feel as though I might pass out at any moment. I take in gulps of Heaven’s sweet air, finding its scent unlike anything I’ve ever smelled before. After spending so much time in my own acrid domain, the untainted air of the saints provides a stark contrast to what I’m used to.
As I absorb my surroundings, I know exactly where we’re standing.
It’s a re-creation of a setting I used for one of the scenes I showed Anna from her past as Seraphina. This is where she and Lucifer danced for the last time before he started the war. The hill I’m standing on is covered with long green grass. The blades are so soft against my bare feet I feel like I’m standing on a carpet of velvet. The sound of the rustling leaves on the tree we’re standing underneath is rhythmic and soothing. As I look out across a large body of water that seems to reach well into the horizon, I see a classic sunset that divides the upper blue sky from the lower red-orange hues.
I look over at Ravan and notice how beautiful she looks in the glow of the setting sun. Her pale skin is luminescent, giving it an otherworldly quality, while her hair shines as if each strand is lit from within.
“I don’t understand,” I say to her. “How was I allowed to even come here?”
“He said you would be able to breach the veil in the body you made for yourself,” Ravan tells me, looking me up and down but not in a judgmental way. “Apparently it isn’t human, or you wouldn’t have been allowed to come here, but you’re not angelic either. To be honest, I’m not sure you can be classified as anything known.”
“Why have you brought me here?” I ask.
“He wants to speak with you,” she replies with a wistful smile.
I know who the “He” is she is referring to without having to ask her to explain, but I still don’t understand why I’ve been allowed to breach the hallowed halls of Heaven.
“You may leave now, Ravan,” I hear God say behind me.
Ravan looks over her shoulder and smiles at Him just before she disappears.
From Lucifer’s memories and from the other memories of the angels I’ve met, I’ve always known what being in the presence of God is supposed to feel like. Now, as I actually stand before Him, I understand why they all treasure the sensation so much. Even after all the sin Lucifer perpetuated on Earth, he always yearned to be close to his Father again. I have to admit the warmth of acceptance God emits is rather addictive. If I thought I was a sinner, I could see how such a thing would call a person to Him.
I turn around to face God for the first time in my life and find Him in His usual guise. He chose this form when he first met Lilly and has used it ever since.
“Hello, Helena,” He says as His eyes bore into mine, as if He’s searching for some particular truth. “I thought it was time we had a talk.”
“What could you and I possibly have to talk about?” I ask. “And why was Ravan the one who brought me here? I thought she hated You.”
“Ravan is attempting to atone for her many sins,” God informs me. “She came to Me not too long ago and asked for My forgiveness.”
“Well, I hope you don’t expect the same hero-worship from me,” I reply defiantly.
“I have no expectations where you’re concerned,” God replies.
To be honest, I’m not sure if I should be happy or offended by His statement.
“Then why am I here?” I demand.
“I thought it was time I met Lucifer’s second-born,” He tells me.
I swallow hard after hearing His reason.
I feel a yearning in my heart to hear Him say it again.
“Lucifer doesn’t see me that way,” I reply, feeling as though God has touched upon the one thing in my life that has always bothered me.
“No, he doesn’t,” God agrees. “Do you know why he refuses to acknowledge you as his child?”
Having God state for a fact my true relationship to Lucifer crumbles a wall I’ve sustained all of my life. It’s a wall I’ve used to protect myself from my father’s cruel denials of who I am to him. I try to blink back unwanted tears, but one escapes anyway and slides down my right cheek. I shake my head, silently telling Him that I don’t know the answer to His question. I fear if I try to speak, it might come out as a weak sob.
“It’s because you were born from Lucifer’s hate,” God starts to explain to me. “And in his mind, that makes you nothing more than a tool he used to find a way to hurt Me.”
“Why does he continue to deny who I am to him?” I ask, desperate to finally discover the truth.
“Because you’re a reminder of everything that went wrong in his life,” God answers honestly. “He made you to give him comfort in his darkest days, and he fed you so much of his hate and loathing that he can’t imagine you as anything but a repository of the worst parts of his own soul. Now that he’s come back to Me, he doesn’t want to acknowledge what he did to make you what you are today.”
“And what am I?”
“Only you can decide that, Helena, and in order to do that, you have to face some truths about yourself.”
Confused, I ask, “What do you mean by that?”
The tranquil scenery surrounding us fades to be replaced by another scene I conjured to show Anna.
We’re standing in the replica of the dark Guf in Hell. Behind God, I see myself appear to Lucifer as an eight-year-old Anna. The scene is frozen in the moment Lucifer first saw me. The expression of horror and disgust on his face is one I will never forget.
“Why are You showing me this?” I ask, unable to tear my eyes away from Lucifer’s face.