The bright sun glinted off the blue waters below as Sallie whispered a hushed good-bye, mindful not to glance at Autumn or Connor just now. She was glad she hadn’t run into Kevin prior to leaving, unsure how she might have handled such an encounter.
The drive to Lancaster County was filled with Autumn’s happy talk and some adorable babbling from Connor, his dimpled hands moving about. After a while, Sallie settled into the ride and closed her eyes.
“Are you praying, Miss Sallie?” Autumn asked quietly.
“Jah. Thanking God for this special summer . . . and for having the opportunity to be your nanny.”
“And Connor’s sometimes nanny?” Autumn asked, seeming taller, or maybe it was her sleeveless navy and white sailor dress.
“Most definitely.”
Monique glanced at Autumn in the rearview mirror. “Let Miss Sallie have a breather, honey,” she said.
“Okay, Mommy.” Autumn turned and looked out the window for a few minutes before taking out her iPad to play games while Connor slept.
Lord God, bless this dear family, Sallie prayed, not adding a plea for herself. Truly, despite the way things had ended with Kevin, she was full of gratitude for all the things she had seen and heard in beautiful Cape May.
Sallie hugged and kissed her mother the minute she got out of the SUV. Mamm gripped Sallie’s hands, saying she was glad her youngest was where she belonged.
Frannie ran out the door and flung her arms around Sallie. “You’re home at last!”
Feeling a little overwhelmed, Sallie realized anew just how much she’d missed both of them . . . and Dat, too, though he wasn’t on hand at that moment. Likely helping out a bit in the field, if he’s up to it.
It wasn’t long after their arrival that Autumn asked to see the road horses grazing in the pasture, so Sallie, along with Frannie, showed her around the farm while Mamm stayed back with Monique and the baby in the kitchen, keeping them company.
When Sallie returned to the house with Autumn and Frannie, all of them had a glass of the cold lemonade Mamm offered. Autumn stood close to Sallie, reaching for her hand.
“Who’s gonna write the first letter?” she whispered up to her.
Sallie volunteered. “I will, if you’d like.”
“Okay! And I’ll answer yours right away.” Autumn grinned.
“Tell me all about fourth grade, won’t ya?” Sallie leaned down and gave her a hug.
Monique stood up and told Autumn to hop in the car. “Daddy will wonder what’s keeping us,” she said, securing Connor back into his infant carrier.
“Denki for a splendid summer!” Sallie said, giving Connor a kiss on the cheek and Monique a quick embrace.
“Thank you,” Monique said, blowing a kiss. “We’ll keep in touch.”
Frannie stood there with Sallie till the SUV had backed out of the driveway. “Good-byes are always hard, jah?” Frannie said. “But hullos, all the better.”
“That’s for sure,” Sallie said, walking with her toward the Dawdi Haus to see how Mamm and Frannie had it set up.
“It’s awful nice havin’ you home,” Frannie said as she linked her arm through Sallie’s. “It’s felt like the longest summer ever.”
“But you got to see the ocean, too . . . remember?”
Frannie nodded. “Wasn’t talking ’bout that.”
“Nee . . . I know.” There was no need to bring up what was surely on her sister’s mind.
“Well, I’m back now . . . so no more worries, okay?” Sallie said.
Not long after Sallie arrived at Essie’s, Barbie Ann walked in the back door. By the look on her sister-in-law’s face, something was up.
Good news? With every ounce of her being, Sallie hoped so.
“Willkumm Heem, Sallie! I was hoping to catch ya.” Barbie Ann’s face shone with pleasure. “Aaron had his latest checkup yesterday, and he’s mending real nicely—the doctors are surprised how well.”
Sallie’s heart filled with gratitude. “I’d love to stop by and see little Aaron sometime, if ya don’t mind,” she said. “It’s been far too long.”
“We’ll both come an’ visit him real soon,” Essie said, looking at Sallie.
Barbie Ann smiled sweetly. “I’ll be sure an’ let him know. He’s out at an auction with his Dat today. And if ya don’t mind, he might like to hear a few stories ’bout those whales ya saw. He’s awful curious, that one.”
“Jah, for certain,” Sallie agreed, so thankful for this precious answer from heaven.
Just as Sallie assumed, the Amish grapevine swiftly spread the word that she had returned, and by the next morning following Preaching, she was wrapped in the familiar welcoming spirit of the People during the shared meal.
Perry’s sisters, along with his mother, came right over and greeted her, as did Sallie’s many aunts and female cousins.
Before the gathering disbanded for home, even Perry himself hobbled up to her, using a walking stick, and passed a note to her, asking to see her at Singing that evening. She glanced up from reading it and caught his eye, nodding her head.
Yet Sallie felt a strange undertow of sadness when she returned home with Cousin Essie later that afternoon, recalling her time at the ocean with great fondness. Or was it Kevin she missed? The sea and her former friend were forever intertwined in her mind . . . and her heart.
The Sunday night Singing was a pleasant way for Sallie to get reacquainted with her life as an Amish youth, courting age as she was. So when the parent sponsor blew the pitch pipe and they all began to sing “Jesus, Lover of My Soul,” she entered in with her best voice. And as she sang, joining in with the other fellows and girls present, she realized how much she had missed the camaraderie of her Amish friends and cousins.
Spotting Perry in the long line of boys on the opposite side of the wooden tables, she smiled for him. After all, he had been waiting for her. It was only fair to treat him with the kindness he deserved.
On the ride home in his black open carriage, Perry lost no time in picking up where they’d left off with the dating question. No longer did it hang in the balance between them, and she promptly accepted his invitation to play Dutch Blitz at his married cousin’s home next Saturday evening. It was, after all, possibly the best way to move on with her life.
They talked quietly, amiably, as they’d often done. And now that Sallie’s providential visit to Cape May was a thing of the past, it was time to abide by her promise to settle down. This fall, she would pull back on her waitressing hours, something she nearly expected Perry to request of her anyway in due time. Should we begin to court.
“Silo fillin’s just around the corner,” Perry said, mentioning how nice and cool an evening it was for that time of year.
“Jah, and lots for us womenfolk to do, too,” she replied, thinking of the fun they would have putting up peaches and plums real soon. “It’s always a happy time.” She said it more for her benefit than for Perry’s, but she knew he loved peaches.
He chuckled. “The men always wonder what’s really takin’ place indoors during those work frolics.”
“Ach, my lips are sealed.”
“No telling stories out of school?” he probed.
“Well . . . sometimes.”
This made him laugh all the harder, and she could tell he was more relaxed than usual. And the way Perry smiled at her, he didn’t have to say a single word about being mighty glad to have her home again.
44
Sallie had looked forward to returning to waitressing at the Old Barn Restaurant, and while it was good to be back, memories of Cape May unexpectedly dominated her thoughts.
She felt like an island, disconnected and floating aimlessly through a sea of what-ifs, unable to change her course. She contemplated this every night as she read her Bible while sitting next to Essie on the screened-in back porch.
At times, Sallie recalled the worship service at the Cape May church, and the sermon she’d received with an open heart . . . at least at firs
t. Privately, she longed for a Sunday school community of believers, though not discounting the gathering of People she dearly loved.
In the space of two months’ time, Sallie’s life had changed. Or had these seeds been taking root all the years she was growing up a little Plain girl, filled with wonder and curiosity—making a small raft to float down the neighbors’ creek, climbing up into the attic at Uncle Rudy’s and peering out the dormer window for a bird’s-eye view? Always running off somewhere whenever she could to experience something new?
But it was time to move ahead with her life here, so she looked forward to possibly spending more time with likeable Perry. He was, after all, the man she should love.
Cousin Essie had been generous to consent to allowing a photograph of the Cape May Lighthouse to hang in the spare room, now Sallie’s bedroom. A photo Sallie had taken herself. “It’s so tall and white—a beacon of light to all,” she told Essie while they worked together to put up late sweet corn.
“Certainly a marvel of man,” Essie said kindly, though with an air of distraction.
Sallie wasn’t altogether convinced her cousin was much interested. And their conversation soon turned to the annual benefit auction for the Clinic for Special Children, to be held the next farm over come mid-October. Yet underlying all of their cordial chats, and despite Sallie’s determination to bring good cheer to her aunt, was the feeling that Essie was worried. It wasn’t even what Essie said; it was the way she might cast a concerned glance when they were working together in the greenhouses, or after supper, when Sallie was sitting on the floor in Essie’s cozy front room with the cat trio, all of them vying for her attention at once.
Sallie knew she had become quieter and more pensive since returning, yet she was determined to keep her promises and had even accepted a second date with Perry. At least Perry doesn’t seem to mind if I talk of Autumn and the Logans.
She asked for a demonstration of his fast-talking auctioneer jargon when they were out, and while Perry had grinned reluctantly at first, he eventually obliged her by launching into a rapid, rhythmic cadence.
Sallie clapped her hands softly. “I daresay you’re the best auctioneer in Lancaster County!”
“Ach, Sallie.” His ruddy face reddened all the more. Still, he clearly enjoyed her attention.
Two weeks after Sallie’s return home, Len and Monique came with Autumn for supper at the Old Barn Restaurant. After a bit of reminiscing, Len mentioned that he had just returned from being out of town for seven days on business. “Monique had to carry more than her usual load, so she deserves a change of pace tonight.”
Autumn nodded her head, zeroing her gaze in on Sallie, then scooting away from the table with a giggle to give her a big hug.
“Well, I’m glad to be part of your night out,” Sallie said, smiling, delighted to see them again. She flipped her order pad to the next page, her pen poised.
“We’re thinking of going to the Jersey Shore for Labor Day weekend and wondered if you’d like to come along,” Len said with a glance at Autumn.
Sallie’s heart jumped at the invitation, but she dared not accept. It would be too hard to leave again, she realized with a start. Even so, she thanked them profusely.
Dear Autumn wilted but managed to regain hope when Len mentioned that there would be other opportunities.
Sallie just let it be. After all, she’d had her time away. Now she must focus on farm life.
Silently, she thanked the Lord for her many blessings. And enough memories of Cape May to last a lifetime.
The next day, after Preaching, Frannie came up to Cousin Essie’s, and the three of them decided to go for a buggy ride to visit Dawdi Riehl, who Mamm said had been doing poorly the last couple of days.
“Mamm thinks his eyes are set on heaven,” Frannie said.
“Well, his heart’s there already.” Essie lifted her gaze toward the sky as she stood near the kitchen window.
“Who can blame him . . . he misses Mammi so,” Sallie noted softly. “Love has the strongest pull on us.”
Frannie turned to look at her, then reached for Sallie’s hand. “You’ve seemed awfully solemn here lately, sister. I’ve almost wondered if you might be missing someone, too.”
“That’s over,” Sallie managed to say, surprised at Frannie’s mention of Kevin, especially with Essie nearby.
Frannie squeezed her hand, offering an apologetic smile.
Sallie caught Essie’s gaze, and an awkward silence filled the room.
45
September moved in swiftly with the cultivation of Mamm’s large garden of celery, rows and rows of it grown for the sole purpose of feeding hundreds of guests at Frannie and Jesse’s wedding feast, just two months away.
It was also apple-picking time. Sallie and the women of her family harvested bushels of Gala apples for cider making. Picking McIntosh apples came next, the best ones for applesauce. The Riehl women put up enough for each of the relatives represented to have an abundance of sauce for the year ahead.
Nearly the minute that task was accomplished, they got busy with canning Cortland apples for pies and apple cobbler all winter long. Sallie and Frannie had fun making caramel apples, too, and sold dozens of them at their roadside stand.
And, right on the due date, Sallie’s sister-in-law Kate delivered her and Allen’s first baby girl in the main house with the aid of the midwife. Thrilled at the new addition to the family, Sallie and Frannie pitched in to help with the boys, Buddy Al and little James. Sallie read Bible storybooks to them—sometimes, when Buddy Al pleaded for it, the same story two or three times in a sitting.
Kate asked Sallie if she’d be willing to help her out now and then, saying she’d be happy to take whatever help she could get, and Sallie agreed to do so occasionally. And three days a week, Sallie filled up the morning hours with what she’d grown to love, caring for children.
During the last week of September, a postcard arrived from Cathy’s Creations notifying Sallie that her order had been delayed but would ship ASAP. There was also another letter from Autumn, who had been sending notes with drawings in the margins.
Sallie carried Essie’s mail up to the house, having already slipped the businesslike postcard from Kevin’s mother into her skirt pocket. The order for the decorative initial had actually slipped Sallie’s mind, but seeing the delay notice reminded her of the craft fair in Cape May . . . and of the time spent in that idyllic town.
A world away from Lancaster County . . .
The truth was, experiencing Cape May had not satisfied her curiosity for travel to other locales. If anything, it had only whetted her appetite for more.
Her dream to travel had escalated into a desire to live a life without regrets and to help others. When she stopped to ponder it, Sallie craved the freedom to choose a different life path, yet a God-honoring one . . . not knowing for certain what.
On the first Saturday in October, Sallie helped her mother set up their market table, pleased to interact with the many customers. There was a special feeling in the air, what with the harvest nearly past, except for the field corn.
Perry dropped by to see Sallie, dressed in a dark blue shirt and his black trousers and suspenders.
“So nice to see ya,” she greeted him.
Perry nodded with enthusiasm. “Can you slip away for a bit?” he asked, removing his straw hat.
“Jah, sure.” Quickly, she excused herself to her beaming mother and walked with him toward the entrance. Even now, Perry still had a noticeable limp, but other than that, he was back to his strapping self.
He held the door for her, and they walked outside, moving far enough away from the entry so as not to be overheard.
At first they engaged in small talk, but Sallie wondered what he actually had in mind. And even though she was sure the conversation would lead to his proposing another evening together, she couldn’t help thinking about Cousin Essie, who seemed perfectly happy as a Maidel. She remembered how Essie had once said that
a girl should never consider being serious about a beau till she was prepared to be single. In other words, content with one’s place in life.
She recalled the few dates she’d had with Perry since her return. Was it right to mislead him, just to move past her heartache? It’s not happening between us, she admitted to herself. I can’t settle for anything less than love.
Just as she had anticipated, Perry asked her out for the coming Saturday evening, smiling confidently.
“Perry,” she began, “you likely wouldn’t suspect it, but I’ve been wrestling with something here lately.” She fingered her Kapp string. “Truth is, I don’t think we should keep seeing each other, at least not the way you’d like.” She smoothed her cape dress, bracing herself for what might come.
His face paled. “Guess I thought things were going well between us.”
She couldn’t tell him that she knew how it felt to be in love and was trying so hard to feel that way toward him. “Perry . . . I . . .”
He shook his head. “Ach, Sallie, won’t you give it more time?”
“I don’t know what the future holds,” she said softly, “but I do know I’m not the right girl for you.”
He looked down, moving his straw hat around in his hands. “Is there someone else, maybe? Did ya meet someone in Cape May?” He raised his eyes to hers.
Sallie met his gaze. “Livin’ around Englischers has changed me in many ways. And while there was someone, there isn’t anymore.” She paused, not sure how to express her reasons without causing him undue pain. “But I know my heart is longing for something more. . . .”
He reached for her hand and squeezed it. “You sound awful sure of yourself, Sallie.”
She shrugged. “Don’t know about that, but I am praying ever so hard ’bout my future. ’Tis the best place to turn when we have questions.”
The Ebb Tide Page 23