by Raine Miller
“You don’t stay at the work house anymore?”
Danny frowned. “I run away from there, sir. They was very mean. I get more food fending for myself…” He trailed off and peeked up at Jeremy, afraid he’d said too much.
“I see.” Jeremy put a finger to his lips. “Mr. Smith tells me you fancy the horses. You come every day and help with jobs in the stables. He thinks you have potential, Danny.”
“Oh.” Danny seemed unimpressed at first then looked as if he thought better of his response. “Is that a good thing, sir?”
“Do you know what the word ‘potential’ means, Danny?”
“No, sir.” Danny shook his head.
“It means you have the capacity, the ability, and the hope to succeed, if you’ve the will and the mind to learn. So here is my offer. You may have a place in my household, as a paid man, and under the tutelage of Mr. Smith here, in the goal of becoming a driver for me. Honest work, mind you, horsemen labor well, Danny, but you’ll have a safe and comfortable home for as long as you want, away from the hard streets, and you’ll never need worry about your meals again.” Jeremy gave Danny a polite nod.
Danny stayed silent, but Jeremy could see a tremor run through the boy, and fear. By Jeremy’s best guess, he looked to be around twelve or thirteen and didn’t quite know how to take in all the adulation, surely never had any, and was rightly wary of such foreign attentions.
“I can see you need time to consider, Danny, and that is fine. A man must make his decisions wisely and think carefully before rushing to a judgment. Why don’t you come back and see me when you have decided what you wish to do.”
“I—I—I accept, sir. I don’t need no time to think. I want to come work for you,” Danny blurted, his voice starting to waver. He twisted his scrap of cloth cap mercilessly in his hands. A tear appeared. And then another. “Th–thank y–y–you, sir. Thank you—”
Danny crumbled under the weight of emotion and buried his face in Ned’s jacket. Ned snaked out an arm and patted him on the shoulder. “There now, Danny. I told you it will work itself out,” Ned told him. “Buck up, boy, you’re a driver’s apprentice now!”
Danny swiped the tears away and stood tall before his new master. Ned left his hand where it was, and nodded to Jeremy in thanks.
Jeremy held out his hand to Danny. The solid shake the boy returned seemed a good omen for their future relationship.
Fate brought people together in the strangest ways, Jeremy thought. He owed this discarded boy so very much and felt enormously glad inside his heart to be allowed to make a difference in his, thus far, wretched and lonely life. The funny thing was, it made a difference in Jeremy’s life, too.
When the two took their leave, Jeremy kept Ned back. He waited until the stunned but hopeful Danny was sent off for the kitchens, in wonderment of his new station.
“I have a job for you, Ned. Have you any talent for acting?”
“I beg pardon, Mr. Greymont?”
“We have to help right a wrong that’s been done, Ned, and I am asking for your help and most likely the help of your new protégé. You may never speak of it once the job is done and if asked, must deny any knowledge of the facts. Do I have your pledge?”
“Never doubt it, sir, I am your man.”
Chapter Thirty-Four
…Remember that thou hast to be thankful and grateful
even for the mere privilege to breathe…
—Eleazar of Worms, Sefer Rokeah (13th c.)
“There you are! I was hoping to find you in here, my darling.” Gina swanned into solarium, carrying an envelope. Frisk hopped up from his place and greeted her first. She stopped to give him an affectionate pat and a good rub behind the ears. “Hello, Sir Frisk. Are you guarding the master again? I think you’ve forgotten whose dog you are,” she teased, lifting a smirking face to Jeremy.
She looked good enough to eat, he thought, all rosy and glowing in a pale pink gown. He wondered if their baby would be a son or a daughter, picturing light hair and hazel eyes upon a cherub face. In an instant, his emotions bubbled up, and he felt his eyes twitch. He blinked and pushed his sappy agitation down and away, thinking his injuries must have weakened his mind as well as his body. He didn’t ever want Gina to see him like this.
Jeremy reached out his hands to her and offered his lips for a kiss. “Miss me?” he teased, making his voice a little naughty.
“Always,” she told him, clasping his hands and pressing her sweet lips to his.
“I thought you were buried deep into party plans with Grandmamma, ordering new gowns and other fripperies for the yuletide. She’s got Grandfather and me in to see the tailor tomorrow. I know how it works.” He pulled her onto his lap and went straight for her neck, his hands wandering up her ribs and forward to the swells of her breasts. “But I’m very glad you came to find me,” he murmured, distracted by the softness and scent of her skin.
“Yes, well, I was, but I’ve managed to escape for the moment. Your grandmother is a very capable hostess and is quite dogged in her pursuit of the perfect festive accruements. She’s probably better at party arranging than I can ever hope to be. Actually, we shall be going out this afternoon to have a dress fitting and meeting ladies for tea. Grandmamma is introducing me to her friends, Lady Dorchester and Lady Lampson, and Lady Lampson’s recently widowed niece, a Mrs. Golding.”
“Well, good luck then. I try to give Lady Dorchester a wide berth and am afraid I cannot help you much with Lady Lampson either. My advice is to paste a content expression upon your face and sit there looking beautiful, which should be no trouble for you. Lady Lampson loves to carry the conversation, so you shouldn’t have to say much. Fortitude, Mrs. Greymont.”
“Sounds like a treat. I cannot wait,” she said wryly.
“Not to worry, my sweetheart, you have many other talents that I adore and appreciate.” He quirked his brows teasingly. “To what do I owe the honor of this welcome visit?”
“Two reasons, my darling.” She brought a hand up and smoothed back his unruly hair. “That boy, Danny, who helped us the night you were hurt.”
“Yes? What about him?”
“Well, according to Jane, Ned has taken quite a shine to Danny and begs to hope you might have something for him—you know, to get him off the streets.”
“Some persons prefer street life to that of a more sedentary inclination.” Jeremy enjoyed playing with her.
Gina gave her head a little shake, her chin lifting just a fraction. “Not Danny, I’d venture. Jane says he comes every day to help Ned with the horses and do errands and such. Jane and Ned are quite taken with Danny.”
“Ah. Are they indeed? And do you think this might in any way be related to Jane taking a shine to Ned Smith? I’ve seen the way your maid looks at my coachman with stars in her eyes.”
Gina cupped his face. “Could be. She looks at him rather the way I look at you.”
Jeremy nodded thoughtfully for dramatic effect. “So you want me to indulge the whims of our courting servants, do you? Next thing I know, Ned will be asking for promotion so he can marry her!” He kept his face stoic.
“Well, in this instance, yes, Jeremy, I do,” she said imperiously. “I cannot imagine that two loyal servants courting would be much of a bother to you, and since I know you to be the very best of men, and that helping Danny is the upstanding thing to do, I am sure a place can be found for the poor boy.”
She waited on his answer, perched so sweetly upon his lap.
“Will you do it?” she asked after a moment, questioning his long silence, the hint of frustration lacing her words.
He kissed her first. “You never asked for anything before. I love that you are asking something of me now. I hope it is just the first of many requests you will make of me. Seeing you happy is my joy. And yes, my darling sweetheart, I will make a place for Danny. In fact, I have beaten you to it. I met with Ned and Danny not one hour ago, and it’s already settled. He will come to live at Hallborough and
work under Ned, who will groom him as a driver.”
“And Ned and Jane?” Georgina asked.
Jeremy shrugged. “Who am I to interfere with Cupid’s Arrow among starry-eyed lovers?”
She giggled at him.
“Does my lordly pronouncement meet with your approval, my lady wife?”
“You know it does, Jeremy. Thank you for helping Danny. It’s the right thing for us to do. I owe him more than I can ever repay.”
Jeremy thought her declaration odd and rather a bit dramatic. “Well, yes, he made all the difference in helping to rescue you from—”
“No, Jeremy. That is not the reason I owe so much to that boy.”
“What could possibly be the reason then?” he asked unbelievingly.
“You. You are my reason, Jeremy.” She kissed him on his forehead. “Without Danny knowing the way, we could have never reached hospital so quickly. Ned said he didn’t know where to go. Danny directed us straight to Dr. Cameron in time to save your life. You owe your life to him.”
“And not just to him. Also to you, my Gina.”
Jeremy held onto her for a long time, wondering if he now lived in a waking dream. So much of the foundation upon which his whole life had been built felt like air underneath him. Things that had held importance before meant little now. Self-gratifying behaviors were just that. They entertained the self, but didn’t offer anything helpful to the common good.
“Are you all right? You seem very far away.”
He smiled at his beloved. “I am well, sweetheart. Just wool-gathering a bit. Thinking about how blessed I am.” He touched the tip of her nose. “Mostly because of you.” Then he remembered her words from before. “Didn’t you say you had two things to see me about?”
“Yes I did. My darling, the post has come, and a letter from—well, this has arrived for you.” Her voice betrayed the calm expression she wore as she held out the envelope to him and moved up, off his lap.
He took it from Gina’s hand and read the sender’s address. Mdme. T. Blufette. Dread hit him like a wall, and he was afraid to read it.
He knew fear in the moment. What would it say? Goddamn! Did he have an illegitimate child that he’d never known about? How could that be? He’d always used precautions, and he’d never been with Therese in that way. She was the proprietress, not a working girl. He just couldn’t imagine whatever it was that Therese Blufette wanted from him, but thought it couldn’t be good.
Gina’s expression was unreadable as she looked at him from her seat. He shook his head. “I don’t know what this is. I cannot imagine what she wants to talk to me about, but whatever it is, I want you to hear it, too. I’ll face any news she has to tell if you don’t forsake me.”
She rose from her chair and walked over to him. He stood up slowly and faced her.
Emotion overpowered him again, and he felt his vision go blurry. “I’ve never been more helpless and terrified than when you were in Strawnly’s grip. I’d die to protect you, and willingly. You are that precious to me.” He leaned a little closer. “Whatever this is Therese wants from me, I can solve if I have you safe and by my side and know you’ll always be there.”
She raised her brows. “You know I will be, Jeremy.” She spoke rather severely to him. “Please don’t doubt my loyalty, right now or in the future. After all we’ve been through, you must recognize it by now.” Her voice got deeper, the husky sound he adored tempering her chastisement. “I thought we agreed to forgive those things which came before we found each other.”
He stared at her for the longest time—her furrowed brows and solemn strength, resolute before him. It was all he could do until the words could form on his lips.
“I never believed in love. Thought it was idiotic fodder for poets and artists. But I was wrong, so very wrong. I knew of my error the day I spied you in the rain at Oakfield. Something snapped inside my chest, and I felt instantly different, changed somehow. I could sense it but had no idea how or why such feelings could be in me. I just knew I wanted you. You. It will only ever be you.” He locked on to her clear, serious eyes. “I gave up my disavowal of love in an instant and had no regrets. I wanted to love you, but more than anything I wanted you to love me.” He held out both hands to her. She grasped them in hers with strength, and he knew great relief. “And I know that you do.”
He pulled Gina into his arms. Solid under his trembling hands, her silent embrace all the reassurance he needed. Yes, his Gina was a gentle woman but stronger than anyone he’d ever known. Courage like an ancient Greek goddess. Artemis came to mind… Bow pulled taut, ready to fly a deadly arrow, steadfast to the end. What a portrait that would make—Gina portrayed as Artemis.
“You were right,” he whispered.
“About what?”
“It does hurt to love someone so much. And I’ve learned something else, too. Before you, all the hardness and rough behavior with those others—”
He choked on his words and heard his own voice tremble, but by God he would explain his feelings to her. This was important, and she deserved to know. He took a deep breath and tried again.
“For myself I know now what I was doing was a way to try to feel something because my spirit was so very empty. I didn’t know it at the time. With you though, all I could do was ‘feel.’ It was like walking into the light and seeing for the first time in my life. Such a great difference of feeling with you, my Gina. And I felt it right away. Like nothing I’ve ever known.”
Jeremy cupped her face with one hand and brushed her cheekbone with his thumb. “Please don’t ever leave me, Gina. I could not live in a world without you. Now that I know the joys of your love, I realize that a life without you would be no life at all.”
“You’ll never have to worry about that though,” she told him, her voice going deep and soft as she leaned into his palm.
“That’s the part of loving that hurts.”
Gina looked to him in question, her head tilted.
“Knowing that you couldn’t live without that person. That you need them so badly, you’d die if they ever left or were lost to you. It’s what happened to my mother. When my father left her, she died. Didn’t want to live anymore. I vowed never to give my heart away like she did, but history has a way of repeating itself I s’pose.” He smiled a little. “For that’s exactly what I’ve done with you.”
Chapter Thirty-Five
Anger and jealousy can no more bear to lose sight
of their objects than love.
—George Eliot, The Mill on the Floss (1860)
Walking up to the door, Georgina could feel the tension wafting off of Jeremy next to her. Therese Blufette’s private residence stood before them both, and soon they’d know whatever it was that she wanted from Jeremy.
The house itself was part of the elegant Adelphi complex, overlooking the Thames, fashionable and artfully designed by the Adam brothers of Scotland.
A butler admitted them into a cheerful white-and-gold salon with a very frail-looking Therese arranged on the chaise. She was most definitely ill, and if the suggestion had been noticeable before, now it was a surety.
“Welcome to my home, Mr. and Mrs. Greymont. Please excuse my dishabille and my improper greeting. I thank you for granting me this audience.” She graciously bowed her head.
“You are ill, Madame,” Jeremy said. He worded it as a statement. There was no denying the facts, and Georgina understood how it seemed wrong not to acknowledge it honestly.
“Yes. I imagine I’ll not see another spring, in this life,” she answered gently, her skin so pale it appeared almost translucent.
“Surely not, Madame,” Jeremy said.
“I apologize if my condition is uncomfortable for you, Mr. Greymont. I assure you I regret causing distress to you or your wife. ’Tis not my intention. But, my failing health is the impetus though. The reason I have asked you to come. I have so little time left, and my doctors assure me there are no treatments or therapies of any benefit to me at this s
tage. I am plagued with a cancer that will prove to be the victor in this fight, without a doubt.”
She folded her hands in her lap, and spoke carefully. “I have no regrets. My life has been full. I have loved and been loved. I was blessed with motherhood rather late in my life, but no less welcomed. I have a son. A wonderful boy. Twelve years old. Did you know that, Mr. Greymont?”
“We are very sorry for your troubles, Madame Blufette,” Jeremy told her. He was calm and dignified, Georgina thought. She could tell he was trying to be sympathetic to this dying woman, but bewildered and uneasy. He cleared his throat. “No, I was unaware that you had a son.” He squared his shoulders and set his jaw. “Why, Madame, have you summoned me, and why are you telling me all of this? Tell me why you speak of your son in such ominous suggestion.”
“Because apart from me, you are his only family. He is of your blood.”
“No.” Jeremy shook his head at her. “He could not possibly be my son. Madame, we have never—you and I did not ever—” He held up a palm. “You know he could not be mine,” Jeremy said quietly but firmly, his other hand reaching out to enclose Georgina’s smaller one in a tight clasp.
“Not your son, Mr. Greymont. Your brother.” She nodded slowly. “My son’s father and yours are one in the same—Henri Greymont. My son is your brother. You share blood and a name. He is called Revé. Revé Greymont.”
Georgina felt her hand get squeezed tighter and breath expel out of Jeremy. He was in shock. Such shock that she imagined Therese could have toppled him with only the tiniest of nudges.
Jeremy leapt up off of the settee all in a rush and then dragged a shaking hand through his hair, making it spread out in disarray. “Can this be true?” Jeremy looked at Georgina first and then back at Therese. There was a tremble in his lip. “I have a brother…” Jeremy sat down again.
* * * *
Jeremy sat down before his legs gave out and he ended up flat on his own arse. A brother… “How is this?” he managed to choke out.