by Donna Grant
Just what time had he gotten up?
“As I said yesterday, we’ll have several alternative means of getting away if the Russians attack. Whether they work for Irina or not, we need to be prepared,” he explained, coming up beside her.
“I see that,” she said as she noted the different routes in various colors.
“Learn the maps inside and out. You need to be able to know which one to take at a second’s notice.” He held up a tiny, flesh-colored device. “This will be in your ear, and I’ll talk to you through it.”
Natalie took the earpiece. “Will I be able to talk to you, as well?”
“I’ll hear you and those close to you, so yes, I’ll be able to answer.”
That made her feel a little better. She looked at the maps. “Where will you be?”
He circled an area with his finger. “This is where you’ll intersect with Irina. I’ll be here.”
She followed the line of his finger to a building that would have direct line of sight to her.
“The sixteenth floor is under renovation for a law firm that’s moving in. I’ll set up there and keep watch.”
“It looks like a good vantage point. If we have to take the red, blue, or purple escape routes, you’ll be right there.”
Owen tapped the map where he’d be watching. “Even if we must use the yellow, green, or orange routes, I’ll still be able to get to you here,” he said and pointed to a location two blocks away.
If there had been even a smidgen of doubt as to Owen being qualified to keep her alive, that was now gone. She listened as he explained how she would get away from Irina or anyone else, where she could hide, and the places where they could meet up depending on which escape plan was used.
One strategy had them going into the drainage ditches. Another had them using public transportation to “blend” in. There were several others she would need to memorize, as well. The truck would be waiting for them to make their final exit from Dallas and return to the ranch.
When Owen finished going over things thirty minutes later, she pulled out a chair and sat. “What do Wyatt and Cullen think of this?”
“Wyatt doesn’t think we should do it alone. I’ve not been able to get ahold of Cullen.”
She rocked back in the chair. “And you think all of us need to stay apart?”
“Callie has confirmed that Cullen was seen at Dover AFB in Delaware. He should’ve met up with Mia by now and be tracking their own leads. Wyatt is attempting to keep up with Callie, who is following a clue she has yet to share with him.”
She blew out a breath, nodding. “And we’ve got our thing. It’s going to take all of us to find Orrin.”
“And stop the hit on you,” he added.
How could she forget that? “And that, as well.”
He stared at the map for a long moment. Just when she thought he had nothing more to say, he lifted one of the maps and pulled out a picture frame hidden beneath.
She leaned forward to see it was a family photo of the Loughmans when Melanie was still alive. It must have been taken months before her death, and by the genuine smiles everyone wore, they had been a happy family.
“Dad kept this down here in his office,” Owen said.
She raised her eyes to him. “Why wouldn’t he? It’s his family. Despite losing his wife and his sons ignoring him, this was a time when everything was going right.”
“You mean when we were happy.”
“Yes.”
He drew in a deep breath and slowly released it as he looked around the base. “I still recall the day we came home from school in a torrential rainstorm. There was a smell I didn’t recognize about the place. It’s burned into my memory, though. It was the smell of death.”
Her gut clenched because Owen never spoke of his mother’s murder. None of the Loughmans did. It was forbidden and completely off-limits to everyone. So she wasn’t sure why he was telling her now.
“Wyatt ran to the barn and grabbed the rifles while I hid Cullen. Even at ten years old, I knew something wasn’t right. Everything was too quiet. I know it sounds weird, but it felt as if the elements were in an uproar.”
Her eyes burned with unshed tears. She fought to keep them from falling as she listened.
Owen looked down at the table. “I cocked the shotgun and trailed Wyatt into the house. We followed the smell up the stairs. The storm ceased suddenly, and the quiet was eerie.”
He paused, and she saw his hands grip the edge of the table so tightly his knuckles turned white. It was everything she could do not to reach over and touch him, to offer comfort.
“We found Mom in her room, lying on the bed. At first, we thought she was sleeping. Then we walked closer and saw her eyes open, staring at the ceiling.”
She clasped her hands together in her lap. Then drew in a shuddering breath, blinking rapidly. Her heart hurt to think of a ten-year-old Owen finding his mother in such a way.
“I still see the vivid bruising around her neck from the strangulation in my dreams sometimes.” His eyes slid to her. “I stood guard over Mom while Wyatt checked the rest of the house and the barns. Then we kept Cullen from seeing anything by sending him to the neighbors’ for help.”
The “neighbors’” was a house miles down the road.
“He rode one of the stallions, who was a handful, but the fastest horse on the ranch. Cullen didn’t argue about us getting the horse ready for him. He held on with a death grip and wide eyes. The stallion seemed to know something was wrong. He didn’t fight the bit or the saddle as he usually did. He stood still as stone while Cullen used the fence to climb on him. Then they took off in a flash.”
A tear escaped and rolled down her cheek. Everyone in the small town knew of Melanie’s murder, but all she’d ever heard were rumors. She supposed that the only ones who knew this part of the story were the brothers.
For a long moment, Owen stared at her in silence. Then he blinked, as if remembering what he was doing. “The police finally arrived. Wyatt and I were quickly shoved out of the way. Cullen remained at the neighbors’, which was for the best. I still think how odd it was that everyone who entered the house whispered. I thought it was because of us, but now I know it was because of Mom.”
Natalie had met Mrs. Loughman several times at school functions. Melanie had been a beautiful, kind woman, who always had a smile on her face and time to spare for anyone who needed it. She never missed an event with her boys, and she was always ready with a hug and a kiss for them, no matter if they wanted it or not. She was one of those rare people who didn’t have an enemy.
Owen dropped his chin to his chest. “There was no blood, but death doesn’t need such displays to leave its mark. We were sitting on the porch steps when Dad arrived. He’d been on his way home on leave. The storm raged again. The lightning was horrible, and the rain torrential. He ran past us and into the house, not even seeing us. He was looking for Mom, but they’d already taken her body.”
She hastily wiped away another couple of tears that escaped.
“It took six deputies to restrain him. He broke the sheriff’s nose and someone else’s arm.” Owen grew quiet, contemplative for a moment. “There are some things I’ll never forget about that day. The quiet, the smell of death, the sight of my mom with the bruises. And the sound of my father’s grief as he bellowed her name over and over again.”
By this time, she couldn’t hold back the tears. They flowed freely. She sniffed quietly, unable to move, her gaze locked on Owen.
He lifted his head and reached over to wipe at the tears on one of her cheeks. “Just a few days ago, I arrived to that same stillness, that same smell of death. The difference was, there was blood this time. Lots of it. Death had once more left its mark on this house, and it was ghastly and horrific. I lost two more members of my family. Then they went after you. I tell you all this, Nat, so you’ll understand why I need you safe. Why I will do whatever it takes to keep those men from getting to you. Because I can’t lose any
one else. Especially you.”
She blinked, her throat clogged with emotion too thick to work through. With no words available, she put her hand atop his and squeezed.
He stood straight and gazed at her with his dark brown eyes. “I’m not going to let them near you.”
“I know you won’t.”
His word wasn’t something Owen gave lightly, and once you had it, it was as binding as a vow.
He turned and walked from the conference room to the armory. She stood on shaky legs and made her way to the sleeping quarters before she sank onto her bed and buried her head in her hands as she cried.
Now that she knew details of Melanie Loughman’s murder, as well as Wyatt’s and Owen’s involvement, she cried even harder. The boys had suffered so much.
It explained a lot about the Loughmans.
Especially Owen.
CHAPTER TWENTY-SEVEN
The rest of the day was spent gathering the weapons. Natalie was never far, but Owen was all too conscious of the wall she’d erected around herself.
He checked the Glock 19, moving the slide back and forth a few times before returning it to its holster. He then palmed two more magazines and set them beside the pistol.
Besides the Glock, he also had a Beretta M9 and a Colt that would be tucked into his boot. Not to mention the two knives hidden on his person.
He also tested the sights on a sniper rifle and three other semi-automatic rifles. While he worked on the weapons, he thought over what he’d told Natalie. He wasn’t sure why he’d shared the memories of that life-changing day. He had never even spoken to his brothers about it.
Returning to the ranch brought everything back in living color. A reminder of how much life had sucked after his mother’s murder.
Knowing what he did now, he was surprised Orrin hadn’t gone after those responsible for his mother’s death. Then again, for all he knew, his dad had. It wasn’t as if he kept in contact with Orrin.
He began putting bullets in the magazines. It had been easy to stay away from the ranch and the memories. Yet, it also brought home a painful reminder—he only had one parent.
And Orrin was in the hands of the Russian military.
There was no doubt he and his brothers had done their father wrong. All of them had handled Melanie’s murder their own way, but it pulled them apart instead of bringing them together.
If his mother were alive, she’d be grossly disappointed in all of them. And he found he was disappointed in himself.
He set down the magazine and closed his eyes. If he and his brothers had felt the loss of Melanie, then their father had been hit even harder.
Not only had he lost his wife, but also the mother of his children. Their father had become a single parent while dealing with his own grief. Owen didn’t even want to think of how he might’ve handled things in his father’s shoes.
“We’re going to find him.”
His eyes snapped open at the sound of Natalie’s voice. He turned his head to find her standing in the doorway to the armory, but he couldn’t hold her green gaze. He looked to the magazine clip in his hand, now full. He set it aside and began to load a second.
“Being back is hard, isn’t it?” she asked.
“Yeah. I think that’s why I kept away for so long.”
“It wasn’t just because of your dad?”
He gave a shake of his head. “I’ve been thinking of him a lot. Growing up, I was lost in my misery. I’m only now comprehending that he had his own grief to overcome while trying to raise us.”
“I can’t imagine.”
“Hating him was easy. He left us with Virgil and Charlotte to go back to the SEALs. I know it was his job, but it made it easy to blame him for everything. He was rarely here.”
She leaned against the doorway. “Do you still hold him responsible for your mother’s death?”
“I’ve always believed he was the cause of it. I know that with certainty after being a SEAL. No matter how deep undercover or unseen we think we are, someone always discovers our identities.”
Owen finished the second magazine and started another. To his surprise, Natalie walked to him and laid a hand upon his, stilling him. She took the clip and began to fill it herself.
He searched her face, but she simply gave him a small smile. It wasn’t just memories of the past that stirred something within him. It was Natalie, as well.
Being with her again, recalling how hot the passion burned between them and how good they fit together had pulled back the curtain of his life.
And he didn’t like what he saw.
He thought he didn’t need anyone, but the truth stood before him now. It was Natalie. It had always been her. How empty his life had been without her, how meaningless everything was.
Without a doubt, he knew he wanted her in his life—forever. He wanted her by his side, living, fighting, and loving as only they could.
The chances of that happening were slim, but regardless of the outcome, she had a right to know the real reason he’d left her fourteen years earlier.
“It was because of Mom,” he said.
Natalie’s brows rose. “What was?”
“My leaving you graduation night.”
Her hands stilled. She blinked up at him, her eyes giving nothing away. Finally, she set the bullets and magazine down and ran a hand through her long, light brown tresses.
Owen took that as his cue to continue. “I never doubted love existed. I saw it with my parents. I also saw how my father suffered after her death. More than anything, I knew what it was to walk into a room and find someone I loved murdered. The military was where I was born to be. I recognized and accepted that from an early age. What I wouldn’t accept was bringing my work home and it affecting my family.”
Her gaze lowered to the floor for a heartbeat.
“It’s dangerous work I do. I never wanted to worry that some vermin would come after you while I was on a mission. I refused to have my children come home and find you as I found my mom. The only way I could guarantee that wouldn’t happen was to leave.”
For long minutes, Natalie didn’t respond. Then she resumed loading the magazine. “Now that I know how you found Melanie, I understand it all now. You should’ve talked with me, though. Leaving as you did was a dick move.”
“It was,” he said, trying to hide his smile. “I’m sorry.”
“As I told you already, it’s in the past.”
“Is it? Seems it’s still very much a part of current things.”
She cut him a look. “Only because you keep bringing it up.”
“Don’t you see we have a second chance here?”
She set down the magazine once more and faced him. “You want me now? Now that you’ve gone about your life as you wished?”
He hesitated because he knew by her tone any way he answered would be wrong. “Yes.”
“Too damn bad. There was a time I would’ve crawled through Hell and back again to get you back. I’m not that girl anymore.”
She turned and left him standing there, wishing he could change the past.
All he had was the here and now. Not even the future was guaranteed in his line of work. It didn’t matter if he had five minutes or fifty years, he wanted that time with Natalie.
All he needed to do was come up with a way to convince her of that while making up for the mistakes he’d made before.
An hour later, he walked up to the barn and stared over the land. With the sun nearly set, the sky was a vivid array of oranges, reds, and pinks.
Being at the ranch was just as hard as he’d always known it would be. It wasn’t just the memories, but the sorrow of not having his mother there to share it with.
From the paddock, the mare snickered at him while the filly flicked her tail, watching him intently with dark, soulful eyes. He stilled when he heard Natalie walk up the steps.
She passed him without a word and walked straight to the mare. While he watched, he saw the smile on Nat’s
face as she whispered to the horses, rubbing the mare’s head all the while.
Those lips of hers were more tempting now than ever before. He craved Natalie with a fire that threatened to devour him. All those years thinking he was living the life he wanted had been nothing but a joke.
What he wanted—what he needed—was Natalie.
And he had his work cut out for him if he intended to change her mind about them. There was no way she could respond to his touch as she had and not feel something.
She might not love him anymore, but there were still feelings there. That gave him all the hope he needed that he could get her to fall in love with him again.
The filly pranced around the pen, staying just out of reach of Natalie. He slowly walked to them, stopping a few feet from the fence.
“She’s warming to you,” he told Natalie.
Nat turned her head slightly to him. “She’s the most beautiful thing I’ve ever seen.”
“Master Ben did his job, but it’s the mares who really give us such beauties.”
Natalie squatted down and held out her hand, whistling softly. He held his breath while the foal hesitantly took a few steps toward Natalie before hastily backing away.
But Nat didn’t give up. She called again. This time, the filly came close enough to stick out her nose and sniff Natalie’s hand. After another minute, the foal took that last step.
He listened to Natalie talk to the filly while petting her neck and head. “You always had a way with the horses.”
“I expected to feel odd showing up here that first time after so many years, but I didn’t. This place has always felt…” she trailed off.
“Like home,” he finished.
She nodded, shooting him a brief look. “Why would you stay away from such a beautiful place?”
“Memories. They’re in every facet of this ranch.”
Natalie stood when the foal turned to the mare to feed. “Good and bad memories. Don’t focus on just the bad. It doesn’t do your mother justice. Your father needs you. Remember that.”
“I’m trying.”
“Try harder.”
He hesitated when he saw her looking at the oak tree. Was she remembering the story he’d told her of watching his parents there? She’d thought it romantic, and it was.