“Is this some kind of joke? Where is this son I’m supposed to have?”
Confusion turned to panic as she studied him and listened to his words. All of this was as unfamiliar to her as the stranger’s face.
“Izzy, it’s not a joke. It would be a cruel one if it was. My brother and his wife are looking after Jesse. I’ll have them bring him in to see you if you would like.”
“I must be dreaming. This isn’t real.”
Silence followed as she absorbed the information. Perhaps seeing Jesse would help her recall all that was supposed to have occurred. It was reasonable to believe she had lost her memory. Her head certainly hurt, and she was in the hospital.
“Yes, I would like to see him.”
When Nathan arrived with Jesse half an hour later, Mitch decided he should warn Jesse about his mother’s condition before going in.
“Jesse,” he began, crouching down so they were eye to eye. “Before I take you in to see your mom, I have to talk to you about how she is. Sometimes when someone hits their head really hard, they can forget things. At the moment your mom has forgotten things. She might not remember who you are, but that doesn’t mean she doesn’t love you. Do you understand?”
He nodded. “Will she remember me later?”
“We hope so.”
The rage inside simmered again and his fury over the damage Anton had caused threatened to boil over.
Jesse, looking braver than his four years, told Mitch he was ready to see Isabelle.
Chapter Twenty Five
Memories
Thoughts swirled about Isabelle’s already muddled mind.
How was all this possible? Why couldn’t she remember anything? She knew the medical reason, but her frustration at lost memories left her feeling numb and sad. The shock of knowing Adrian had died and she’d already lived through it once was crushing.
She had a little boy she didn’t even know. How difficult would it be for him? To have a mother who didn’t recognize him. Furthermore, it seemed she had formed a relationship with an incredibly sexy man, and she couldn’t recollect any of their time together. He seemed devastated by this. How deep were her feelings for this man?
Apparently, they planned to move into a new house together, so it was reasonable to assume they were serious about each other. Isabelle decided these were the things she needed to find out. Perhaps the more information she could obtain, the higher the chances of her memory being triggered.
As Isabelle began to consider all the information she needed to gather, Carol was wheeled in by the handsome stranger. Following behind them was an adorable blond, curly haired boy who resembled Adrian so much that her heart ached. There was no doubt in her mind that he was his father’s son. Now if only she could remember that he was hers as well.
“Isabelle, honey, I was so worried about you,” Carol said, leaning forward to embrace her daughter. “I’m so relieved you’re all right.”
“I’ll be okay, Mom. I’ve just got a really sore head,” she smiled. Seeing a friendly, familiar face helped.
“Have you remembered anything?” Carol asked.
“Not yet,” she said, and turned to the beautiful boy who was her son. “Hello, Jesse. I guess this is all a bit confusing for you?”
“Mommy, I’m sad that you can’t remember,” he whispered, with tears in his eyes.
Isabelle’s heart lurched as familiar maternal instinct rose within her and despite not being able to remember her son, she felt the instant connection.
“Jesse, come up here and sit with me.” She watched as Mitch helped him onto the bed and another familiar feeling tugged at her heart. Ignoring it for now, she looked into the face of her son. “Come here, sweetie,” she said, arms outstretched.
Without further thought he curled into her embrace and she pulled him in close. The scent of his hair and the warmth of him in her arms brought forth a familiarity she felt rather than remembered. He cried quietly in her arms and her natural inclination was to croon to him until the tears subsided.
“Do you remember him?” Carol asked her voice full of hope.
“It isn’t a memory, but a feeling. I want to nurture him, and I feel our bond though I can’t remember it. I guess you’re going to have to fill in the blanks for me.”
“I’ll tell you all our stories when you come home,” Jesse announced with pride.
“That’s sounds great, Jesse. It will be kind of like doing them all again. Maybe it will help me remember.” With a quick glance at the silent Mitch, Isabelle turned to Carol. “Where is home exactly?”
“Didn’t Mitch tell you we’re all moving into the house that he bought?”
Carol turned to him in confusion and his face remained stoic, giving Isabelle no idea as to what he was thinking. Blue eyes studied her, but he remained silent.
“Wait a minute, you told me we’d bought the house together,” Isabelle said to him and still his face didn’t change. His unreadable expression increased her frustration. “Did we buy it together or did you buy it?”
After several moments he frowned before letting out a small sigh. “I bought it so you could finish your studies. You have your own money to contribute, but I was going to help you.”
“Where did we live before that?” she asked Carol.
“In a small apartment in the city.”
“I guess it would be appropriate for us to go there when I’m discharged.”
“Honey, we no longer have a lease. The only place we have to live is the house at the beach. All our belongings are there.”
“Would it be possible to find us somewhere else to live while I’m in the hospital? Dr Greene said I would be here for a week.”
“I’m not being discharged for another couple of days either.” Carol added.
“You can stay at the house, Isabelle,” Mitch said, and she turned her attention to him again. His expression still gave nothing away. “There are four bedrooms, so there’s enough room for all of us.”
“I can’t expect you to support my whole family.” She knew she was being stubborn, but there was truth to her words. Mitch was a stranger to her, and she didn’t want his pity or charity.
“We have some money saved,” Carol said. “We can live off that for a while. If you want to find somewhere else, you can, but let’s wait till you’re released from the hospital. Recover at the house for a while until we can work things out.”
Carol hoped her daughter would relinquish her pride and stay at the house. Her aim was to try and evoke some memories with Mitch around. Maybe their love for each other could help. She admitted to feeling close to Jesse, maybe she could find it for Mitch as well.
“I’ll think about it,” said Isabelle.
That was the best they would get for now and it was a start. Isabelle generally liked to mull over things before making a decision, at least she had until she met Mitch. The changes she’d seen in Isabelle were a welcome sight and Carol cursed the events that had reversed all of them.
Dr Greene put a stop to further conversation and advised them all to let Isabelle get some rest and give her time to absorb all her new information. Jesse kissed Isabelle goodbye and went out to the hall where Nathan and Carrie were waiting for him. Mitch wheeled Carol back to her room.
“Do you think she’ll come and stay at the house?” Mitch asked and Carol couldn’t help but note the hope in his voice.
Although he’d been quiet while they visited Isabelle and seemed to be taking it in his stride, she now knew he tried to remain strong in Isabelle’s presence. Inside he would be in turmoil. How awful it must be to know the woman you love has no idea who you are.
“Yes, I do. She might be proud, but she’s also sensible and will realize it’s the best option. When I’m released, we can collect Jesse and stay there while we wait for her to recover. Perhaps you could unpack all our things so that everything is ready for her discharge. You may as well do something to keep busy rather than being here day and night. It must be hard for you to see he
r anyway while she doesn’t remember you. You know her, Mitch, and you must realize we have to tread carefully and slowly.”
“I know you’re right,” he said with a reluctant sigh, his expression now showing his sadness and worry.
She had no idea how he managed to keep his face impassive during their visit. Encouraging him to remain strong would be the best solution or she feared he wouldn’t get through it.
“I miss her so much. I’m a stranger to her now. How am I going to live in the same house with her and not be with her?”
“Mitch,” and she placed her hand on his before continuing. “You have to try. Like Dr Greene said, tell her about your time together, it may prompt her memory. Even being around you may do this as well.”
“What if it doesn’t, Carol?” His voice sounded pained and she cursed the man who had caused their lives to change. Until this moment Carol hadn’t realized how dismayed he had become.
“Then I guess you’re going to have to get her to fall in love with you again.”
After leaving the hospital, Mitch went back to the house to shower and change. He intended to start unpacking, until the scent of Isabelle in a box containing her clothes assaulted him, and he knew it would be too difficult today. His wounds were too fresh.
The thought that she may never remember their time together tore him apart. As Carol said, if she didn’t remember, they could always start over. The trouble with that was, what if she didn’t fall in love with him a second time? How was he going to live in their house with her and not be able to touch her, kiss her and share his bed with her? Have her being unfamiliar with him, not knowing him or loving him?
He decided to see the only person he knew able to suppress his feelings, someone who would understand and help him. Jared.
After calling and discovering Jared was home, relief flooded through him. Hanging around the new house wasn’t an option.
When he had been with Jared for a while, he would collect Jesse and take him home. The boy needed stability more than anyone else at the moment and Mitch was determined to ensure he would be strong for Jesse. Mitch also thought Jesse might enjoy unpacking his things and putting them into what would become his new bedroom.
“Hey, Mitch. How’s Isabelle?” Jared asked after opening the door.
“The doctor is pleased with her progress.”
Jared studied Mitch for a moment. “Then why the long face?”
“She has what they call post traumatic amnesia. Her last memory is from before she had Jesse. She doesn’t know him or me.”
“Ah, Mitch, that sucks.”
“Tell me about it. First, I thought I was going to lose her and now she’s going to be okay, I’ve lost her anyway. I’m grateful she’s alive, but she still isn’t back, not for us anyway.”
“Will she get her memory back?” Jared asked him as he led him out to the patio. Mitch slumped into the nearest chair.
“The doctor doesn’t know. He’s encouraging us to fill in her memories and see if it returns. The only positive thing was she felt a bond with Jesse even though she didn’t remember him. The doctor was pleased and told me it was a good sign.”
“You’ll just have to be patient then, won’t you?”
“How the hell am I supposed to do that? How do I suppress how I feel, remain strong and in control?”
“With resolute willpower.”
“How did you do it when Charlotte was here recovering, and you were determined not to trust her? How did you suppress your feelings?”
“With great difficult. If you remember, I didn’t last very long.” They exchanged a brief smile.
“My point exactly. If you couldn’t do it, how will I?”
“You have to find the strength deep in your gut and push your feelings aside. Think about the outcome and benefits that will come from it. That is how I do it. I don’t have to do it with Charlotte anymore of course, but I do have to at work. Some of the things I see… you have to learn to be unemotional.”
“I have a newfound respect for you, little brother. I have no idea how I’m supposed to do that.”
“Growing up with two older brothers has taught me to be resilient.” He grinned again.
“Was I really that bad?” Remorse coursed through Mitch.
“Sometimes.” Jared smiled again. “Don’t beat yourself up about it. I was born serious and it has its benefits. I appreciate the good things about life more. Charlotte tells me this is why I’m thoughtful and romantic.” He rolled his eyes, but Mitch could see the truth in his words.
“I’m proud of you, Jared.”
Jared’s booming laugh filled the porch and resonated across the yard into the night. “Now who's the sentimental one? You’ve always given me a hard time about that, but I think you are the most sentimental of us all. You just hide it better. That’s what you have to do with your feelings, bury them a little. Show her that you love her without pressuring her.”
“How did you get so wise?” Mitch asked with a wry grin.
“By looking at the world through serious eyes. The less you say the more you observe.”
“I think I lost myself somewhere. When I was travelling, I saw things I wish I hadn’t. I started to become consumed with sympathy and I knew I had to walk away. I shut it all out and I think I must have become desensitized and withdrawn. I became that womanizing creep because I was numb. I’ve always been easy-going, but I think the compassionate side of me disappeared until I met Isabelle. Now I’m softer than before.” A self-conscious laugh erupted from deep inside and he felt like a new man and found strength in this.
“You’ve always been soft.” Jared laughed again and Mitch glared at him.
“Don’t push your luck, little brother.”
“Seriously, Mitch, I feel like, for the first time, we have something in common, compassion. Until I met Charlotte, I hid it too, but now you need to use these emotions and stop hiding. Use your emotions to give you strength.”
“Thanks, Jared. You’ve helped me see things clearly.”
“Anytime.”
“Listen to us… I feel like I have to go and do something macho and manly now.”
“Sounds like a beer and catching a footy match on TV is in order then.”
Many beers, jeers and arguments later, Mitch crashed in Jared’s spare room.
Although a little bleary from too many drinks, he woke determined and ready. After consuming a greasy breakfast, Mitch set off to collect Jesse from Nathan’s.
During following the days, Mitch and Jesse prepared the house for Carol and Isabelle’s homecoming. Mitch took Jesse in to see his mother each day but didn’t intrude on their visits. He decided not to pressure her and stayed away. Unless she asked to see him, which she didn’t. As painful as it was, he knew it was a long, slow process and he had to be patient.
Seizing the opportunity to learn more about Jesse, they spent the hours they weren’t at the hospital, together. His feelings for Jesse intensified as each day passed. Jesse had his mother’s strength, and this enabled Mitch to stay strong.
If a four-year-old could accept his mother had lost her memories of him then so could he.
Chapter Twenty Six
The Player
Isolation, loneliness and boredom drove Isabelle to distraction.
At least they moved her out of depressing intensive care. Carol went home two days earlier and time became endless since her mother's departure.
Isabelle enjoyed the hours they spent together the past days, as Carol relayed stories of Jesse’s childhood and past events. She’d been thrilled when some of the things her mother recounted sent flashes of images into her mind.
After Carol’s discharge, Isabelle began having dreams about the past and when she woke, she discovered she could recall these memories while awake. She saw glimpses of when her friendship with Adrian had changed and they conceived Jesse, of being pregnant and of the night Adrian was killed.
Bit by bit Isabelle received hints of events
gone by. In time she hoped to regain all of Jesse’s four years. Then there was the niggling feeling that was Mitchell Montgomery. She still had no recollection of him whatsoever and the familiar feelings she felt for Jesse, she didn’t feel around him. There was something there though, just out of her grasp. Even though she couldn’t recall their time together, there was still something familiar about him.
Then there was the house he’d bought and her lack of recognition regarding this. She hadn’t decided whether it would be the best option to live there with him. Contemplating it more and more, she thought perhaps it would be okay to stay there while trying to piece together her recent life.
Cautious by nature, the idea didn’t quite sit well, but at the same time it could be a way to trigger lost memories. Jesse and Carol both seemed pleased with the notion- what did she have to lose? Not her memory, she knew that much. She smiled at the irony and decided she may gain more by being around people that loved her.
Did Mitch love her? She didn’t know one way or the other. They were in the process of moving in together when she became the target of a stalker- which still sounded bizarre to her- therefore they must have been serious about each other.
One thing was certain; he was gorgeous and seemed a genuinely nice guy. When she was finally discharged, she would have him tell her all the details of their relationship and see if anything returned. He certainly had the qualities and appeal she found attractive. There was also this fuzzy something in her mind about him she couldn’t put her finger on. Isabelle dreamt of him too but wasn’t sure whether they were actual memories or because he was on her mind at present.
When Carol came in to visit that afternoon, she would tell her mother she wanted to stay at the house while they were both recovering. Jesse seemed happy and comfortable with Mitch; perhaps she could trust her son's judgement. Each time Mitch brought Jesse in to see her more of her instinctual feelings returned. After each visit she was able to recall more about her son.
The Player (Broken Wishes Series Book 3) Page 16