by Chloe Walsh
I sat on the couch, focusing on breathing slow and even and trying to ignore the instinct of self-preservation raging inside of my body, urging me to run. The door opened and Kyle walked in, his eyes widened when he saw me. His reddened cheek was proof as to who received the slap I had heard being bestowed.
A moment of relief surged through me, followed swiftly by an even greater feeling of anguish. I was on my feet and in front of Kyle within seconds. “Are you okay?” I reached up and stroked his cheek. “Did she hurt you? Are you sore?” I could feel the tears trickling down my face, but I couldn’t stop crying. “You’re not any of those names she called you. Don’t listen to her.”
The dark side of me was relieved, relieved that it hadn’t been Kyle. That he didn’t hit…women. Thinking this wasn’t the reason I was crying; it was the reason I couldn’t stop. I was a terrible person.
“Shit Lee, I didn’t know you were in here,” he groaned. Kyle clasped my face in his hands and looked down at me; his face was etched with concern. He stroked my cheeks with his thumbs, wiping my tears. “Relax, everything’s okay.” Kyle pulled me against his chest and wrapped his arms me. He held my head against his heart with one hand and stroked my back with the other. I felt my body relax against the warmth of his and the rapid beat of his heart. “I’m fine. Please stop crying princess. I don’t want you upset.”
I nodded and slowly pulled away from him and moved towards to the couch. I sank down and covered my face in hands.
“What was that?” he asked eventually when the silence grew thick.
I leaned forward and rested my elbows on my knees. “I don’t like violence.” It was all I could say. I could hardly tell him about the turbulent emotions whizzing through me, all of which concentrated on him.
“Are you sure that’s all it was? Because I’m gonna be honest with you Lee, that was scary.” Oh great, I freaked him out.
I faked a smile, “I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to scare you. I just…I really do not like violence. I am sorry. I don’t like knowing she hits you because of me.”
Kyle let out a soft sigh. “Don’t say sorry. That wasn’t your fault, she doesn’t need much of an excuse to fly off the handle,” he said. “I’m just glad you’ve not been around to witness Rachel’s outbursts. You would have flooded the house with those tears.” I knew he was trying to crack a joke. It wasn’t funny.
“You mean she does that a lot to you?” I whispered. I could hear the disgust dripping from my question.
Kyle shrugged. “She has a bad temper. She lashes out. I don’t like it, but I understand it.”
I stood up. I could feel my body shaking. “Why do you let her do that to you?”
Kyle laughed. I could tell it was forced. “Have you looked at me lately, princess? I can take a few bitch slaps here and there.” How could he make jokes about this?
“It’s not a joke Kyle. She shouldn’t be hitting you. She treats you so badly, I can’t stand it. Rachel needs to see someone. What if she does this to someone other than you? What about when she has children…” Kyle stopped me before I could finish.
“Back up Lee, just back the fuck up,” he warned. I backed up, all the way to the opposite side of the room. I could feel the anger vibrating from him. “Whatever psychobabble analysis you’ve constructed in your head about Rachel you can forget it. You don’t know anything about her. And you definitely don’t know shit about me. So keep your self-help guides and your goddamn opinions to yourself. I’m not interested in hearing anything you have to say right now.”
With that, he stormed out of the room, slamming the door behind him. I crumpled to the floor and let the pain flood me.
Kyle
I was a bastard. I shouldn’t have gone off on Lee earlier. I was pissed with Rachel for slapping me again and took my frustration out on Lee. I cringed remembering the look of terror in her eyes when I shouted at her. I shouldn’t have shouted. It was obvious Lee was nervous, but what she had said touched on something that Rachel would never have to deal with and that was entirely my fault. The girl had every right to hit me. Christ, I would hit me if I were her.
That didn’t excuse the way I treated Lee though. She had defended me when Rachel was shooting her mouth off and had given me one of the best nights of my life last night. She had tried to comfort me when she thought I was hurt. She was nothing but good. I owed her an apology and I would give her one, just as soon as I could look her in the eye again.
Lee
I wasn’t sure if I should go downstairs. I didn’t know if Kyle wanted me to come down.
I knew he was still here. I could hear him rustling around in his room all afternoon. He had gone downstairs when Cam shouted up that the pizza had arrived, but he’d been so angry earlier that I was still shuffling around my room, debating whether I could face him or not…
“Lee, come on down girl,” Cam called again.
I was just going to have to face him. He would have to deal with it. We all had to live here. I walked downstairs and poked my head around the living room door. Cam and Derek were cuddled up on the love chair eating each other’s faces, which left only the couch to sit on. That option wasn’t looking very good either, not with Kyle sitting on it with Rachel sprawled across his lap.
Dixon and Mo were sitting on the floor near the coffee table, so I focused on them. “Lee you’re here,” Dixon smiled broadly. “I thought I wasn’t gonna be able to stop myself from eating your slice.”
I took a deep breath and walked in, ignoring the two pairs of eyes boring into me. “Well, I’m here now Dixon so hands off,” I joked as I sat on the floor alongside him. I could see Kyle shift on the couch. He moved slightly further from Rachel, but I didn’t dare look to see her reaction. I was too busy hoping to hell that she wouldn’t put a beating on me.
I focused on the two boys next to me. They were very much alike, but that was expected with twins. Both boys were lanky and thin. They both had brown hair, but Mo had green eyes and Dixons were brown. Dixon had his eyebrow pierced, which distinguished them from one another even more.
Dixon nodded his head in my direction. “You’re looking good Lee. Tell me, you got your eye on any man here in Boulder?” I heard a choking noise from behind me.
“You okay bro? You need a drink?” Derek asked.
“No, I’m good Derek,” Kyle replied. I blushed and made some comment to Dixon about focusing on work right now. Dixon continued to prattle on while I ate my slice of margarita, it felt like I was swallowing glass. It was obvious which twin was the outgoing one.
“I’m heading out,” I heard Rachel say and a few seconds later felt a burning pain shoot through my fingers. I looked down at my hand, to see a shoe pressing into my skin. “Good night everyone,” Rachel smirked down at me; there was a look of pure malice in her eyes.
I held in the scream that was bubbling in my throat. I would not give her the satisfaction of knowing she was hurting me.
“Bye now,” Cam said. “Don’t let the door hit you in the ass on the way out. Oh, wait never mind,” She waved enthusiastically at Rachel.
Rachel huffed. “Kyle, walk me out? Now.” She moved her foot and I pulled my hand towards me. Holding it against my stomach, I covered it with my other.
“You okay there Lee?” Mo asked.
“Yeah, I’m good, just real thirsty. I’ll be right back.” I got up and went straight to the kitchen sink. Running the faucet, I let the cold water wash over my aching fingers. Thank god Rachel was skinny; otherwise my fingers could have been a lot sorer. I reckoned it was just bruising. They stung, but I could move them and I’d had a lot worse.
“I’m sorry about today.” I turned to see Kyle standing in the doorway. He was sorry? He looked guilty.
I turned off the tap and wrapped my hand in a tea towel. “Me too, I interfered in your business. I won’t do it again.”
Kyle stepped closer. “You hurt your hand or something?” He had that worried look on his face. Before I could move, he too
k my hand and slowly unwound the towel. “Holy shit Lee. How’d you do that?”
His thumb softly traced my swollen fingers. “I caught them in the door.” He believed me; I was good at covering up.
“Damn Lee, you gotta be more careful. You could have snapped these. It could have been a lot worse.” I grimaced. Kyle didn’t realize how much more careful I needed to be.
“Thanks, I’ll be sure to remember that,” I muttered. I needed to get out of here.
“You know I’m sorry right?” He was close, too close.
“You already said that,” I replied, taking a step away from him and closer to the door. I needed to keep some distance between Kyle and I. Cam was right; I didn’t want to get in the middle of his drama with Rachel. She was dangerous and I wasn’t strong.
He stared at me, his brows furrowed and I felt naked. It was disturbing how my body reacted to something as trivial as a look from Kyle, but I was on fire, burning up.
“We’re all gonna hit a club, you guys in?” I heard Derek call out.
“Yeah, sure,” I replied, relieved to have an escape from Kyle and his penetrating stare.
Kyle
This was all I needed; Lee in a fucking dress and Dixon chasing after her like some lovesick puppy. Granted, it was one of those long dresses that girls wore during the summer, but I wanted to strangle Derek for his stupid fucking idea. I needed to go clubbing, like I needed a hole in the head. Why was she here? Lee didn’t do clubbing. Hell, she didn’t do house parties. Her being here was messing with my head and I couldn’t take my eyes off the way she moved her body on the dance floor.
“You have to get a handle on this man.”
I gave Derek my best death glare. “You don’t know what you’re talking about Derek.” It was his fucking fault.
“You know exactly what I’m talking about,” he said quietly, “You’re infatuation with little Lee over there.” He pointed over to where she was being accosted by Dixon. “Dude, either walk away from her now or do something about it. Stop sitting on the fence like a fucking girl.”
Deciding on the latter, I stood up and made my way through the crowd until I was behind her. I glared at Dixon as I tugged Lee’s hips towards me. She staggered backwards against my chest and turned her neck.
“Kyle,” she whispered. Her eyes were wide, her lips tempting. I leaned down and nipped her neck. She made to turn towards me, but I stilled her.
“What are you doing?” she asked; her voice thick with desire. The hell if I knew. I had no idea what I was doing anymore. Fuck, I thought I was just warning Dixon off, but now I couldn’t move away.
I flattened my right hand against her stomach and used my left hand to tilt her chin up. I kissed her, softly at first, but Lee moaned into my mouth and I lost control. I turned her in my arms and pulled her roughly against me. Her hands slipped into my hair. Fuck, I loved it when she did that, her touch was so gentle. It was as if she was treasuring me.
Lee
Oh my god, Kyle was kissing me again. I knew I should pull back, but my heart disagreed. The lights were so dark in the club; I could barely see him, but I could smell him and oh god, I could feel him. I wanted him closer; I wanted to climb into him.
I tugged on his hair and he growled into my mouth, grinding himself against me. I could feel his throbbing erection digging into my belly. I wanted him badly. I needed him to take this further, because I wasn’t sure how to. Running my hand down his chest, I gripped his belt buckle, hoping he would get the hint. He did. He sank his teeth into my lip and tugged. It should have hurt, but I was too aroused to feel anything, but desire.
When he released my lip, he ran his tongue over it and I sagged against him. “Do you want me?” I asked, opening my eyes to look up at him.
His eyes were full of lust. He looked crazed with hungered desire. “I shouldn’t,” he whispered as he cupped my cheeks with his hands.
“You should,” I countered bravely, taking one of his hands and placing it on my breast. He shuddered and closed his eyes. I could feel his warm hand tremble as he muttered a string of curse words. His eyes flashed open suddenly and he jerked his hands away.
“Fuck,” he hissed, before stalking off, leaving me standing on the dance floor, watching him walk away from me, taking my heart with him.
Chapter Ten
Lee
Kyle was avoiding me. That much was obvious. It wasn’t the typical storming out of a room whenever he saw me kind of avoidance; he was too smooth for that. Instead, he chose to regard me with the whole ignorance is bliss theory.
I tried not to care. I was busy with work and rarely at home during the day anymore. I had Linda pile so many extra shifts on me at the hotel that I shouldn’t have had time to think about Kyle. I still did though, constantly. He wasn’t the type of man, a girl could forget.
He was polite to me at dinner, or it the others were around. That’s where it ended though. He never touched me or stood too close. He avoided sitting next to me and always excused himself from the room when we were left on our own, but the tension between Kyle and I was still there, simmering away beneath the surface. I pretended not to notice the looks he gave me when he thought I wasn’t looking, or the way his eyes followed me around the room. I tried not let him get to me, but couldn’t stop the shredded feeling inside of me.
They were all returning to college soon. I was secretly jealous of them, their opportunities were limitless, mine less so. I had brains, just no opportunity to use them other than reading.
I thought about the evening two weeks ago, when Kyle had come back from one of his business trips…
It was a Thursday night and I had decided to join in their poker night. I was sitting beside Dixon listening to him teaching me the rules when Kyle had strolled into the room. He’d sat in the armchair opposite to where I was on the floor observing the game with a look of thunder on his face. Whenever Dixon had leaned too close to me, or left his hand on mine too long, Kyle had shifted in his chair or cleared his throat.
His boiling point had been when I won a game and Dixon had kissed my cheek. I hadn’t wanted Dixon to touch me, much less kiss me, but I had remained still. Kyle hadn’t. He had practically jumped out of the chair and stormed out, slamming the sitting room door behind him. I had gone after him, unsure as to why, but I had.
“Is everything okay Kyle?” I had asked when I found him in the backyard. He was leaning against the garden wall pressing his forehead against the cool stone.
He’d swung around when I spoke. Glaring at me, he’d spat. “Is everything okay? How could anything be okay with you here?” He had then proceeded to kick over a flowerpot, implying some snide comment that ‘he guessed I was just the same as the rest of them’ before storming into the house. After that, life was miserable in the house.
Kyle made rude, suggestive comments whenever he had the opportunity and I stayed in my room more often than not. I wasn’t sure why he had been so angry with me for playing poker. I guessed it was to do with mixing with his friends. I didn’t join in any more poker games, or go downstairs when they were having a party. I kept away from Kyle and his tumultuous mood swings.
Kyle
She was driving me fucking insane. I couldn’t get the taste of her out of my head, or the feel of her when she’d been pressed up against me. I wanted in her so bad, I thought my balls would shrivel up and fall off.
I’d slept with more women in the past few weeks in a bid to get Lee out of my head, that I’d lost count. They didn’t help though; I’d just imagined her face every time I came, which defeated the purpose.
She was taunting me on purpose, fucking flaunting herself around the place, flirting with Dixon. At the club, she’d asked me if I wanted her. Was she crazy? Of course, I fucking wanted her, that’s why I walked away from her that night. I was doing this for her. I wished she wouldn’t make it so goddamn hard for me.
I should be relieved she flirted with Dixon. I couldn’t have her and he was doing me a f
avor. Then why did I feel like ripping his and every guy who looked at hers’ head off?
“Dude, where are you going? We have class in like ten minutes?” Derek called from across the campus quad.
I shook my head, “I’ve got to sort some work out.” Fuck, this was harder than I thought it would be. I’d managed work and school last year without a hitch, but Lee was throwing a spanner in the works and my head was all over the place.
Chapter Eleven
Lee
I arrived to work ten minutes early this morning. I’d wanted to get a head start on my chores. I’d been working at the hotel for two months and was settling into a comfortable routine. Every day I clocked in, checked the room roster, grabbed my cleaning cart and set off in the staff elevator. I liked to start on the top floor and work my way down to the first.
I was scrubbing the skirting boards in the first floor corridor, when Linda’s voice called from behind me. “There you are,” she said as she rushed towards me. I looked up from my hands and knees position on the floor. “I need you downstairs in the Mr. Carter’s office ASAP.” She pulled me up and started loading my cloths and spray onto my trolley. “I’ll get this cleared away, but you better get downstairs.”
I stood and straightened my dress. “Okay, is there something wrong?” I was nervous. Linda never asked to do anything besides work my cleaning route before.
“Yes and no. Mr. Carter is here and he is a little angry. I went over his head hiring you; he usually does the hiring and the firing.” Firing? I swallowed a gulp of air, my hands fluttered to my chest. “Oh, don’t worry Hun; he’s not the worst of them. He just didn’t realize I hired you. He probably just wants to check you out for himself.” She smiled at me sympathetically. “Go on now and don’t keep him waiting.” She gave me a little shove towards the elevator.