It was probably a little of both.
“I’m on my way now. Meet you in the lobby.”
A summer’s worth of butterflies fluttered in her stomach as she hopped into a cab. As much as Jane was looking forward to her weekend with Ryan, her stomach tied itself into knots every time she thought about the news she’d unleash on him that night.
When the cab turned onto Fifth Avenue, she forgot the well-rehearsed speech she’d planned to deliver. Her ride came to a stop in front of a luxury hotel. Ryan had obviously spared no expense on their weekend getaway, beginning with their stay at one of the most luxurious hotels in the city.
Jane’s suitcase was whisked away as a doorman in a top hat directed her through the glass doors. She scanned the lobby, her heart beating like a jackhammer in her chest.
How would he react when she told him? What if he was angry? What if he accused her of tricking him? That would be a punch in the gut to her, but she’d survive. She owed it to her unborn baby to stay calm, whatever Ryan said.
Jane paced the lobby, waiting for him.
Maybe this wasn’t a good idea, after all. Doubts swam through her mind, and the pounding in her chest moved to a new position, right above her eyes. A fog clouded her head, and a dizzy spell took over her body. She felt her knees begin to buckle … and then she was being caught by someone warm and strong who smelled delicious, just like…
“Ryan.” She blinked, focused with difficulty on his face.
“What happened, Querida?” he demanded, his voice thick with concern. “You looked like you were about to faint.” His brows seemed stitched together in concern, and he hadn’t loosened his grip on her one bit.
“I’m okay. I didn’t eat breakfast today. I’ll feel better after I eat something.”
He eased her into the nearest chair. “Stay here. Don’t move. I’ll grab you some water.”
Jane leaned back and loosened her coat. The temperature in the lobby seemed to have spiked twenty degrees.
Ryan rushed back with two bottles of water. “Here.” He twisted the cap off and handed her one of the bottles. “Little sips.”
“Really, I’m okay.” She held the bottle to her cheek before taking a drink. When she lowered the bottle, Ryan slipped her coat from her shoulders, and she smiled her thanks. “I’m much better. Really. Don’t worry.”
Concern still etched lines around his eyes. “Keep drinking. If you feel steady enough to be alone for a minute, I’ll get us checked in so you can lie down.”
“That sounds perfect,” Jane assured him, and watched him stride to the registration desk, turning his worried gaze in her direction every few seconds.
Soon, with card access keys in hand, he returned. “Twelfth floor. Elevators are that way,” he said, pointing. “Want me to carry you?”
Jane’s gaze ticked up to meet his, and she smiled. “I can walk just fine,” she assured him, but she wobbled slightly as she stood up.
Ryan’s arm snaked around her back, steadying her as they walked to the bank of elevators and rode upward. But Jane felt her energy return as he opened the door to their suite.
“It’s beautiful!” She walked to the large windows of the living room. “And check out this view. You can see the Park from here.”
Their luggage arrived. Ryan tipped the bellman and closed the door. Then he joined her at the window, wrapping his arms around her and pulling her back to rest against his chest. His breath blew warm as he kissed the top of her head. “So, want to tell me what’s going on?”
She turned in his arms and gazed into his eyes, which were filled with concern. What expression would those eyes hold, after she told him? Would they be filled with contempt instead of worry? She searched his face, and a lump formed in her throat as her pulse quickened. She needed more time.
Jane offered him a feeble smile. “You mean down in the lobby? I told you, I haven’t eaten anything today. Besides, I still had my coat on, and the lobby was hot, wasn’t it?”
His stare bored into her. “People don’t faint easily, Querida. Besides, I’ve heard something in your voice, these past few weeks on the phone. Something’s going on. We said we wouldn’t keep anything from each other, remember? It was one of your demands.”
“I believe my demand was that we wouldn’t lie to each other.” But, in effect, that was exactly what she was doing. Keeping something that important from him was the same as lying. But then she remembered Charlotte’s advice: the Band-Aid approach. “No, I’m sorry. You’re right.” She took a deep breath. “Ryan, I’m pregnant.”
He blinked. “You’re… But you said … how can that be? Are you okay?”
She nodded. “Everything’s fine. I’ve been to my doctor, and I asked her the same thing. I couldn’t believe it. I’d tried for years to get pregnant again, and it seemed as if it just wasn’t meant to be.”
“So what did your doctor say?”
“Her exact words were ‘Miracles happen.’ But, Ryan, I want you to know that I truly believed I couldn’t get pregnant. I don’t want you to think I was trying to trap you into anything.”
“Trap me? Why do you think I’d ever feel that way?” He shook his head. “Who do you think I am?” When she didn’t reply, he pulled away and turned to face the window.
Jane looked at the back of his head. “I’m just giving you an out here. I can do this on my own if I have to.” She moved to the sofa and flopped onto the cushions.
“Why would you think I need an out?”
She couldn’t tell from his tone whether he was hurt or angry.
“Because this wasn’t supposed to be forever,” she explained. “We weren’t supposed to be in a relationship.”
He whipped around and moved to the chair next to the sofa where she sat. Grasping both ends of the upholstered chair-back, he leaned toward her. “But who made up those rules, Jane? You. You did.” His nostrils flared. “Let’s get this out in the open now. I don’t know why you’ve constantly shut me out of anything long-term, but it has to stop, right now. A baby is long-term.”
She swallowed hard. “I don’t want to get hurt again. I promised myself that I wouldn’t let anyone else hurt me the way Nick did.” It was the first time she’d voiced her greatest fear.
Ryan stiffened. “You’re comparing me to that ass of an ex-husband of yours? What makes you think I’d ever do that to you?” He walked around the chair and sat down, pinning her with his gaze.
Jane sighed. Why couldn’t he see what was so self-evident to her? “Well, on one side of the equation we have you. You’re young, sexy, and amazing. I see how women look at you—and that’s just when we’re together. I’m sure you’re hit on all the time at Vine. And on the other side of the equation we have me. I’m going to be a forty-year-old new mom. How un-sexy is that?”
His features softened. “It’s the sexiest thing I can imagine,” he said and reached for her hand.
But she pulled away. “You say that now, but in a few months, or years, you may wish you were with someone younger.”
He tilted his head. “I could say the same thing about you. How do I know you won’t look for someone younger? Maybe I’ll get too old for you.” He shot her a crooked smile.
“You’re making fun of me.”
He slid next to her on the sofa. “No. I’m just trying to show you how silly your worries are. Jane, I love you. I think I fell in love with you before we even met. The moment I saw your picture, I felt a connection with you, so much that it scared me.” He nudged her gently with his shoulder. “The main reason I stopped escorting was I couldn’t tell the difference between what was real and what wasn’t, so I stopped caring. It impacted my whole life. I even pulled away from my family and friends. But you’ve taught me what’s real. What you and I have is real.” He beamed. “I can’t picture my life without you, and now with a baby. A baby! That’s what’s real.”
His smile lit up her heart. “Why are you so perfect?”
He chuckled. “I’m far from per
fect, but I’ll always be there for you and our baby. I promise you that.”
It was all she needed to hear. A tear escaped her eye. Then another. “I’m so scared.” Until that point, she’d treated her pregnancy like a task to attend to. She’d made doctor appointments, taken her prenatal vitamins, eaten nutritious meals, and given up coffee. It was easy to focus on all of the things she had to do, because it kept her busy, which kept her from having to deal with the rest. Now that she’d dropped the bundle in Ryan’s lap too, the emotional hurricane hit her, full force. “I never expected to have another baby. I thought that part of my life was over. What are people going to think?”
“This is between us. Who cares what people think?”
“I don’t know how Tyler will react. And your sister certainly won’t be pleased. She voiced her feelings about us to me, loud and clear.”
“From what you’ve told me about Tyler, I think he’ll handle it well. He seems like an easygoing kid. I can’t wait to meet him. As far as Maya, she’ll deal with it. And Isabel will be thrilled,” Ryan said with a smile. “I’m already spending Christmas in New York, and that’ll give me a chance to get to know Tyler. And you’ll be in San Antonio for New Year. Perfect!” He gave her a searching look. “Does anybody else know?”
“Just Charlotte,” Jane admitted. “She was on the phone with me when I took the test.”
“Well, I’m glad you had her for moral support, but I wish I could’ve been there for you.” He gathered her into his arms. “We have a lot to talk about.”
Jane took a deep breath and blew it out slowly. “We have time to figure it all out. Nearly nine months. For now, let’s just enjoy the weekend, like we planned.”
“What about your mother?”
“My mother… Oh crap. My mother. I forgot about the reservations.” They had made dinner plans for the following evening, to introduce her mother to Ryan. Jane shook her head. “We’ll have to tell her. I’m convinced that the woman has telepathic super powers.”
Ryan chuckled. “If you’re not ready, I’m sure we can keep it quiet.”
“Impossible. She can read people like a book. Me especially.” Jane rolled her eyes. “Oh, this is going to be great. ‘Hey, Mom, meet my boyfriend. Oh, and guess what? I’m knocked up.’ It’s like a bad reality show.”
But Ryan looked unruffled. “No matter how bad the ratings may get, they can’t cancel us. Other people don’t get a vote. Right now, there are only three people who matter.”
“Three?”
“You, me, and our baby.”
Chapter Twenty-One
“Are you sure you’re okay to walk? We’ve had a busy day,” Ryan said as he helped Jane with her coat, happy to see that the stress of the previous day had melted from her face. He’d ordered room service for breakfast and had tried to insist they spend the day in the suite. But Jane had scoffed, telling him it was her birthday, so she got to plan the agenda.
It had been a magical day. He loved seeing how her eyes lit up as she shared her favorite part of the holiday season in New York: window-shopping on Fifth Avenue. In addition to touring the beautiful window displays at Saks, Barney’s, and Bergdorf Goodman, he’d talked her into some actual shopping, too.
“I feel great,” she was assuring him now, retrieving her clutch from the table. “It’s only a couple of blocks. The cab should be dropping my mother off soon, so we should hurry.”
“There will be no hurrying for you, Querida. Your mom can wait a few minutes.”
Jane raised her eyebrows as she applied her lip balm. “You don’t know my mother. She’s not used to being kept waiting. Oh well. At least you’ll get brownie points for taking her to her favorite restaurant. She adores the place.”
Together, they crossed the street and entered Central Park. The white stone building shone like a beacon as it sat nestled in a patch of trees and shrubs. “There,” Jane said, pointing. “She’s just getting out of the cab.”
Ryan focused on the stately woman, whose almost-white hair was pulled back into a low bun. She was taller than he’d expected.
“Mom,” Jane called and waved.
The woman’s face lit up at the sight of her daughter. “Happy birthday, darling!” she said as she hugged Jane.
Ryan knew instantly that he needed to land—and remain on—the good side of Beverly Connolly. Her gaze was already flicking over to him, assessing him closely.
“Mom, I’d like you to meet Ryan Ziegler.”
The older woman offered her hand. “Beverly Connolly. It’s nice to finally meet the man who’s been taking up so much of my daughter’s time,” she said, her voice slow and distinct. Ryan had the feeling that when Beverly talked, people listened.
He took her hand and kissed the top of her knuckles. “The pleasure is mine. I hope I haven’t stolen any of your time with Jane.”
“I’m happy if my daughter is happy,” she said with a slight rise in her brow. “Shall we sit?”
They followed the maître d’ to a table overlooking the garden. “I think this calls for champagne. A bottle of my favorite, please,” she requested.
“Right away, Madam.”
A waiter returned with the bottle and three champagne flutes.
“None for me, thank you. Water is fine,” Jane said when he placed the glass to her right.
“No champagne on your birthday?” Beverly’s gaze moved in her direction before lifting her glass. “Well then, to a beautiful night with a beautiful couple.”
“Cheers,” Ryan said, clinking his glass with Beverly and Jane.
Beverly took a long sip and closed her eyes as she swallowed. Then, carefully placing her glass on the tablecloth, she folded her hands. “You could cut the tension in here with a steak knife. What’s going on?”
Ryan couldn’t help but smile at Jane. “Your daughter told me how astute you are, Mrs. Connolly.”
“It’s Beverly, dear.” She turned to her daughter. “Out with it, Jane.”
Jane reached for Ryan’s hand. “I don’t know how to say this … so I’ll just say it. I’m pregnant.”
Beverly’s gaze bounced from Jane to Ryan and back to Jane before she reached for her glass. She took a longer sip than the first, and held the glass between her fingers in silence for a moment before speaking. “Not much surprises me at my age, but I have to say, I’m very much surprised.”
“I know, Mom. No one is more surprised than me.”
“Tell me, darling, are you happy about it?”
Jane squeezed Ryan’s hand. “Very much. It wasn’t planned, but it was something I’ve wanted for a long time and I never thought it would happen again. I consider it a blessing.”
“Then I’m happy, too. And I have questions. Lots of questions. For now, though, let’s celebrate and enjoy the news of our new family member,” she said, staring at Ryan.
He wasn’t sure if she meant the baby or him.
The mood lightened from that point on. “Is this your first trip to New York?” Beverly asked.
Ryan shook his head. “I was here before I bought my restaurant. It was a research trip, to find out what made the best restaurants great. And what better place to find the best restaurants than New York?”
“And what did you discover? What makes a great restaurant?”
“Food, of course, but it’s more than that. It’s the energy and buzz of the atmosphere. When things are working well in a restaurant, it’s like magic. You can feel it the moment you walk in.”
She nodded slowly, and he was pleased that she seemed to like his answer.
Orders were placed and meals were eaten, along with great conversation and laughter. Beverly Connolly was like no one Ryan had ever met, but he liked her from the start. What he liked most about Jane’s mother was that she didn’t seem to care whether she was liked, as long as she was respected.
“Excuse me a moment,” Jane said, and turned to Ryan, her eyes offering a silent apology. He stood, held her chair, and waited while she left the
table.
Beverly patted the armrest of Jane’s chair. “Sit next to me for a moment, Ryan.”
He angled the chair so he faced the older woman. “I know this is a lot to take in, but I want you to know that I—”
“I know you love my daughter. I can see it in your eyes when you look at her. That’s not my concern. I know it’s fashionable to have untraditional relationships nowadays, but that’s all a crock of shit, as far as I’m concerned. What are your intentions for my daughter and this child?”
“You don’t beat around the bush, do you?”
“There’s not enough time for a good beating. Judging by the look on my daughter’s face, she was scared to death about leaving you here with me alone. She’ll be back soon.”
Ryan looked her in the eye. “I want to marry Jane, Beverly. I wanted to marry her even before I found out about the baby. I had already planned to propose to her this weekend.” He patted his jacket and pulled a small box from his pocket. “I even have the ring.” He flipped open the top, revealing a square-cut diamond solitaire.
Beverly reached for Ryan’s hand and pulled the ring closer. “It’s beautiful. You have fine taste.” She released his hand and pointed to his chest. “You can tell a lot about a man by his taste in jewelry. Why haven’t you asked her yet? I’m sure you’ve had the opportunity.”
“I wanted to do this the right way, and speak with you before I asked her.”
“I see.”
“But now I’m afraid she’s going to think I want to marry her just because of the baby. You and I both know she’s not going to go for that.”
She patted his hand. “That may indeed happen, but don’t give up. She’ll come around.”
“I’ll never give up on her or our baby.”
“You’re a good man, Ryan. Now put that away. Here she comes.”
He slipped the box back into his pocket as the lights cast Jane’s shadow across the table. “Are you two having some sort of powwow without me?”
“I’m just getting to know our dinner companion better. Come and sit. I have a surprise coming.”
Fire and Midnight Page 14