Her heart melted a little at the warm, amused tone of his voice, and a treacherous smile almost found its way to her lips—which infuriated her even more. “You ruined my clothes!”
Jack glanced down at his own dripping shirt and soaked jeans. “You, too.”
“You deserved it, you…troglodyte!”
“Wow. A monster and a troglodyte. A nice step up from the cold, detached, and emotionless robot, huh?”
Talk about irritating! He was lucky that the water was deep where they were and Sara needed to use both arms to keep afloat, because sheʼd gladly give him another shove. “Iʼm not sure itʼs a step up,” she retorted. “In both cases, youʼre a brainless idiot!”
This time Jack couldnʼt help the laughter that burst out of his chest. “Ah, hereʼs my sassy mouth again. I was worried for a minute.” He brushed a strand of wet hair from her left cheek. Sara tried really, really hard to pull away from him, but that darn treacherous body of hers refused to obey and didnʼt move an inch.
“Donʼt you dare touch me. Iʼm still mad at you.” She was. And yet, her eyes automatically closed as Jack leaned into her, and she caught herself tilting her head to let him kiss her throat and neck even as her fisted hands slipped up to his chest.
“Donʼt push me away,” he groaned.
“Iʼm not pushing you away. Youʼre the one who never really lets me get close to you.”
His mouth tore away from her skin. “Sara, donʼt start this crap again, or―”
“Or what?” She held his intense gaze defiantly. “What are you going to do if I donʼt stop? Leave and go to bed? Finally get mad like any normal person? Slap me, maybe?”
Jack winced at her words. With a sharp escape of air, he pushed a hand through his wet hair. “Shit, Sara. You know I could never hit you.”
“Hmm. Thatʼs comforting.”
Evidently he was too out of control to catch the amusement in her words, because he went on as if he hadnʼt heard her. “But damn if youʼre not tempting me!” he burst out, frustrated.
She cocked her head to the side. “Why?”
“What do you mean, why? Because youʼre such a nag one of these days Iʼll rip my ears off just so I wonʼt have to listen to you anymore, thatʼs why!”
“Now, thatʼs a picturesque image.”
“And because, for crying out loud, I doubt I ever felt as many damn emotions in my whole life as I have since I met you, yet to you Iʼm nothing but a cold, detached, and emotionless robot!”
Her smile slipped instantly. “Jack…”
Crossing his arms over the edge of the pool, he absently observed the puddle of water that they’d formed. “I know that sometimes I may come across a little”—he paused, searching for the right word—“distant. Yes, maybe even cold. But, dammit, Sara, Iʼm not emotionless.”
“Honey, Iʼm sorry. I really didnʼt mean that.” She reached for him, but her hand stopped in midair. Remorse gnawed at her soul. She should cut her tongue. She should grow up, stop being so freaking childish. Sheʼd wanted Jack to show emotions? Well, congratulations, sheʼd succeeded. And now she hated herself for it. Whatever reaction sheʼd hoped to get from him, the last thing she wanted was to see him the way he looked right now, his eyes tormented, his voice insecure. And she was the cause of all that pain. That thought was more than she could bear.
Desperate to comfort him, Sara wrapped her arms around his waist and leaned her head against his wet back. “I know youʼre not emotionless, Jack. I donʼt even know why I said it, I just—I guess I was trying to shake you up a little, because I…” She clamped her mouth shut, trying to summon the courage to continue. She had accused him of hiding his emotions, but hadnʼt she done the same? Hadnʼt she kept her love for him secret all this time? Well, she was tired of pretending, tired of concealing her feelings. After all the pain sheʼd caused Jack tonight, the least she could do was tell him the truth.
Sara stepped back, moved in front of him. Her eyes fixed on the drenched shirt clinging to his chest before she raised them to his face. He stared back at her, his brows arched in question, but didnʼt say a word. She inhaled deeply. “The thing is, Jack, I wanted a reaction out of you because I lov―”
His fingers landed on her lips. “Donʼt,” he said sternly. “Don’t say things youʼre going to regret later. Donʼt let words ruin everything.”
Her heart dropped to her stomach. Regret? Ruin? Was that all he thought of her love for him? Numbed by the pain his words had caused her, she dully began shaking her head. She flinched as Jack reached a hand out to touch her. Took an instinctive step backward.
He dropped the hand and pushed it into his wet hair. “Sara, Iʼm sorry. The last few weeks together have been great, but you need to understand…nothing has changed. I donʼt belong here. Iʼm still leaving at the end of the summer. No promises, no strings. Remember?”
Pain stabbed her all over again. Yes, of course she remembered. But that was before… Before what? Before they made love? Before he shook her world and turned her life upside down? No, Sara couldnʼt fool herself like that. As painful as it was to admit it, she had always known where Jack stood. Heʼd never lied to her, never made promises he couldnʼt keep, and she certainly couldnʼt force him into saying what he didnʼt feel. It wasnʼt his fault sheʼd fallen desperately in love and he hadnʼt. It wasnʼt his fault his rejection hurt so much she could barely breathe.
She shifted her gaze back to him. Tried to read his expression, but his eyes were unreadable. If not for the muscle ticking in his jaw, sheʼd have thought the man was completely indifferent. But she knew better now. She knew him better. And she wouldnʼt let his coldness discourage her. One day at a time, she reminded herself. Wasnʼt it what sheʼd resolved to do? No pressure. No regrets, no expectations. Jack might still be set on leaving in a few weeks, but he was there now. With her. And that was all that mattered. For now.
Sara shook her head. “You know what, youʼre right. Forget it. This has been a super-emotional night, and Iʼm not thinking straight anymore. Letʼs just get out of here and go to bed.”
Eyes narrowed, Jack intently studied her face. “Are you sure?”
“Oh, yes.” She forced a smile as she wrapped her arms around his neck, trying her best to sound confident. Sensual. The exact opposite of how she felt. “Yes, Iʼm definitely ready to go to bed.”
More long, maddening moments went by before his expression finally softened. Sara could have sworn she felt every single muscle in his body relax against her as he slid his hands over her hips and pulled her tight against him.
“Okay,” he whispered, grasping the back of her head to capture her mouth in a hot, wet kiss―a kiss so fierce, so deep it made her forget all about his rejection, her doubts, her heartache.
She almost forgot where they were, too, until the contrast between Jackʼs searing body pressed against her chest and the cool water against her back made her shiver. “I, uh, thought we were supposed to get outta here?” she murmured, breaking the kiss.
“Not yet.” Jack moved his mouth to the side of her neck. “Have you ever done it in the water, sweetheart?”
Sara chuckled, shuddering again at the heat of his breath as he nibbled her earlobe. “No, but Iʼm afraid your water adventure will have to wait. I think Iʼm about to grow fish scales.”
His heavy sigh vibrated against her skin. “All right, letʼs go. You owe me, though, so take note.” He lifted her up on the edge with no effort, then pulled himself out, shaking his head to get the water off his hair. “Also, you owe me a pair of jeans. Add it to your note.”
Sara slapped a hand to her mouth, trying to cover her laugh as he took her other hand and they ran into the house, heading straight toward the guestroom Martha had assigned to them. She started undressing as soon as the door closed behind them, more than aware of Jackʼs gaze following her every movement. She shrieked and giggled as he suddenly jumped forward and pulled her in his arms, his eyes flashing with mischief.
“Jack! Youʼre soaking wet!�
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“Have you ever done it in a multi-jetted shower before?” he said on her lips.
Her giggle turned into full laughter. “Nope. But I can add it to my note.”
“To hell with the note.” Sweeping her up with a killer smile, Jack stepped into the shower. “Weʼve got to start somewhere.”
Chapter 23
I knew it was wrong. Yet the days went by, and I still couldnʼt stop thinking about his rejection. It burned. Hurt like a blade. More than Iʼd thought possible―more than it should. And yes, he was right, ours was supposed to be a temporary arrangement since the beginning. I knew that; I had agreed with it. So why was it so hard for me to accept things the way they were and just make the most of it? Why did I keep seeing a future with him I had no business dreaming about?
How had I gotten in so deep, so quickly?
Saraʼs fingers stopped in mid-motion on the keyboard as the doorbell jerked her to reality, but she made no movement to go answer the door. Jack was out on his daily walk with Lance, but he had his keys.
The bell rang again. This had to be Nicky, she mused with a smile, walking downstairs and yanking the door open. “Iʼm not deaf, Nic―” Her smile faded as her eyes fixed upon the beautiful woman standing in front of her.
Tall and lean, she had the most remarkable indigo eyes Sara had ever seen and short dark hair that softly framed her perfectly heart-shaped face. With the impeccable makeup and the elegant, beige silk outfit she was wearing, she looked as if sheʼd just leaped out of a fashion magazine. “May I help you?”
“I hope so. Iʼm looking for Jack Turner,” the woman said, her voice soft as velvet. “I was told heʼs staying here.”
Saraʼs entire body stiffened in alert. “Heʼs not here at the moment. May I ask whoʼs looking for him?”
“Iʼm sorry, I donʼt know where I left my manners.” She smiled, but her nervous chuckle revealed her uneasiness. “My name is Caroline Ward. I just arrived from Chicago. Iʼm Jackʼs girlfriend.”
Saraʼs jaw dropped. As a deafening silence fell upon the two of them, she thought for sure her heart had stopped.
Jackʼs girlfriend.
The beautiful, perfect creature standing at her door and staring at her as if she were a complete idiot…was Jackʼs girlfriend? Sara took a sharp step back, shaking her head in denial. It was impossible. Nicky had assured her that Jack didnʼt have any special relationship in Chicago. Nobody had even reported him missing, for heavenʼs sake!
“Iʼm sorry,” she finally managed to murmur, though she sounded more like a croaking frog than the calm, mature person she was trying to appear. “There must be a mistake. Maybe youʼre looking for a different Jack Turner?”
The other woman took in a deep breath and let it out slowly. “I know I shouldʼve called before coming. I didnʼt mean to catch you by surprise, but I just heard about Jackʼs accident and came here as soon as I could. Please, I need to talk to him.”
Saraʼs heart missed another beat at the sincere concern in her tone. “He really isnʼt here right now. But please, come in. He should be back any minute. In the meantime, maybe you could tell me whatʼs going on,” she suggested, stepping aside to let her in.
“Thank you.”
“My nameʼs Sara, by the way. Sara Milano,” she added shakily, trying to break the ice as the woman followed her to the living room and sat on the couch. “Can I offer you something to drink?”
“No, thanks. I just want to know about Jack. How is he?”
She frowned again. “Ms. Ward―”
“Call me Carrie, please.”
“Okay…Carrie.” Sara drew a deep breath. “Look, I donʼt mean to be rude, but Iʼm afraid youʼre going to have to explain this whole thing to me from the beginning, because right now Iʼm totally confused,” she admitted, sitting in the armchair opposite her. “I was told Jack didnʼt have a girlfriend.”
Carrie shook her head. “It must have been a misunderstanding. Jack and I have been together for over a year.”
Color leached from Saraʼs cheeks. The room started spinning furiously around her, and she gripped the armrests of the chair with both hands to steady herself. Her nails dug deep into the soft fabric as the ground seemed to crumble beneath her.
“If itʼs t-true,” she stuttered, “then why didnʼt you report him missing?”
“Iʼm a journalist,” Carrie explained patiently, as if talking to a little kid. “A foreign correspondent, to be exact. You see, I spent the last three months in the Middle East, and nobody informed me of Jackʼs accident until yesterday, when I got back to the United States. I knew about his trip to Starville; we had talked about it before I left and agreed that it would be easier for us both if we didnʼt bother trying to talk to each other for a few weeks―especially considering how horrible the phone lines are in the Middle East.”
Sara sucked in her breath and held it there, trying to hold on to the last bits of rationality she had left. “But Jack’s business partner doesnʼt know anything about you. He specifically told the authorities that Jack didnʼt have any serious relationship.”
Carrie scoffed a short laugh. “You must not know Jack very well. He never mixes business with his private life. I donʼt personally know Raymond or any other colleagues of his, nor do they know me. Thatʼs how Jack wants it to be, and thatʼs fine with me.”
“I find it hard to believe, honestly.”
“Jack is a complex man, Sara.” Carrie shrugged. “He wants things his own way. Heʼs logical, controlling―and just about as sensitive as those darn computers he loves so much.”
Sara cringed, trying to make sense of those words, but the image Carrie had painted of Jack was diametrically opposed to the one of the sweet, sensitive man with whom sheʼd fallen in love. Suddenly, bits and pieces of the conversation she’d had with Brent a few weeks ago came rushing back, roaring in her ears… I know Jack much better than you, and believe me, heʼs not the man who ate pizza and played board games with us tonight…. The man in your house right now is not the real Jack…. I canʼt help but wonder whatʼs going to happen once he gets his memory back, and how heʼs going to reconcile the man heʼs now with the one he used to be…. Iʼm afraid that the old Jack will win that battle, Sara, while the one weʼre getting to know now is nothing but a transitional phase...
Sara counted to ten, trying to keep calm even though that entire situation was starting to feel more and more as if sheʼd just leaped into an episode of the Twilight Zone. “Look, I donʼt see any nice way to say this, so Iʼll just get it out: Jack and I are―” Once again, she found herself fumbling for the right word. What in the world were she and Jack now? Definitely not simple roommates anymore. Involved? Not when there was no future between them. Lovers? “Together.”
Silence fell over the living room again. Carrie sat there, studying her with utter curiosity, as though she were a strange, curious creature. Finally, her heavy sigh broke the uncomfortable silence. “Iʼm aware that Jack is suffering from a temporary memory loss. I know heʼs confused and doesnʼt remember who he is, and I understand that he might have gotten attached to you, considering the situation. But please, donʼt fool yourself: Jack doesnʼt belong to you.”
The womanʼs composed, conciliatory tone made Sara want to scream at the top of her lungs. Not for the first time, she caught herself trying to fight the urge to kick her out of her house. “Are you saying that he belongs to you?”
Carrieʼs grin couldnʼt have been any more sarcastic. “Iʼm saying that he belongs to himself. And if you havenʼt figured that out, dear, youʼre not the right woman for him.”
The precipice beneath Saraʼs feet became deeper and deeper. Was Carrie right? Was she really just fooling herself into thinking that Jack could really love her? That thought was so painful that she crushed it instantly. “Are you aware of his past?”
“If youʼre asking if I know about J.T.’s murder and the years Jack spent in jail for it, the answer is yes,” she answered in a softer tone. “Sara, I know youʼre confuse
d, and Iʼm sorry for throwing all this at you without any warning. Believe me, I donʼt want to hurt you, but you need to understand the reality of the situation: here in Starville, Jack may still be considered a murderer and a reject, but in Chicago, he is a powerful businessman. Heʼs admired and respected and has every right to be. His criminal record was cleared, and nobody outside of this godforsaken place cares about his past. Jack belongs in Chicago, and thatʼs where he needs to be.”
Sara couldnʼt help but nod. How could she disagree with that?
“Yet,” Carrie continued pensively, “for some reason he seems incapable of freeing himself from Starville. Heʼs spent years trying to shed a light on what happened, but those events still torment him deep inside.”
“J.T. was Jackʼs father, the only real affection heʼs ever known as a child. He loved him, and itʼs only obvious that he wants to find out what really happened to him,” Sara commented, slightly irritated by her insensitivity.
Carrie shook her head with a smile. “Iʼm afraid you have quite a naïve view of the situation, dear. Jack doesnʼt love anybody. This is more like an obsession for him.”
The front door opened with a sudden, sharp click. Every muscle in Saraʼs body stiffened.
“Sweetheart, Lance doesnʼt want to come in, so—” Jackʼs words stopped abruptly as he walked in and noticed Carrie sitting on the couch. His quizzical gaze studied her for a moment, then flicked to Sara. “Sorry. I didnʼt know you had company.”
Sara didnʼt answer. She barely heard him, too busy studying Carrieʼs reaction at his sudden entrance. She hated the way the womanʼs adoring eyes were staring at him, as if trying to eat him up!
The precipice under her feet turned into an abyss. “Jack, I would like to introduce you to Carrie Ward,” she said slowly. “She just flew in from Chicago to see you.”
He frowned. “Iʼm sorry, I donʼt remember you.”
“I figured you wouldnʼt. I heard about your amnesia.” Carrie hinted at a weak smile and stood. “Iʼm Carrie, Jack. Your girlfriend.”
Bound to the Past (Starville Series Book 1) Page 25