by Sybil Bartel
“Stop.” He wiped the tears from my face. “You’re too beautiful to cry.” He leaned in and kissed my cheek then wrapped his arm around my shoulders. “I’ve waited so long to hold you, please, don’t cry.”
“I’m trying not to be a mess.”
“Let it go,” he commanded. “You’re not a mess. I know you weren’t expecting this. We have two weeks together, let’s just enjoy it.”
I took a deep breath and let the authority in his voice soak in and calm my frayed nerves. “Okay.”
Buck draped his arm over me and settled back in his seat as the plane began to taxi. I glanced up but he’d already closed his eyes. I ran my hand down his good thigh and his fingers caressed my shoulder but he didn’t say anything more. Five minutes after the plane took off, he was asleep. I glanced across the aisle.
Talon raised an eyebrow. “You good?”
“Yeah,” I lied.
“You’re lyin’ like a no-legged dog.”
I ignored his remark. “Thank you, for today and last night.” I wouldn’t be here if it weren’t for him.
His face softened to an expression I’d only ever seen once before. “Anytime, Sugar.”
I was transported to a night three months ago when Buck and Talon had freed me. I thought I was saying goodbye to Talon and I couldn’t let him go without telling him what he’d come to mean to me. He’d been the only friend I’d ever had as an adult and I loved him for it, so I told him. The look on his face that night was the one he had right now. Talon and Buck were all I had in this world. All I had...and I’d almost lost Buck.
“Hey, hey, darlin’. We’re all here, we’re all good, don’t get upset.” The million dollar smile he used to get just about anything he wanted spread across his face.
Taking a deep breath, I nodded. “I know.”
He turned serious. “But if somethin’ comes up, you see anythin’, you call me. Let Blaze heal.”
The words should have been an offer but they weren’t, they were a warning that instantly put me on alert. “What’s going on?”
Inscrutable green eyes held mine. “I’m tellin’ you I’m here.”
“Talon...”
He cut me off. “I said my piece.” He leaned back in his seat and closed his eyes.
Chapter Seven
Talon drove us back to my house. I thought he’d just drop us off but he followed us in, went straight to the kitchen and started looking through my fridge and cabinets.
“Damn, Sugar, what the hell do you live on? Captain Crunch?” He pulled a bag out of the cupboard. “And little chocolate bars? Fuck.” He shook his head. “I’m orderin’ takeout.”
At the mention of food my stomach growled, loudly.
Both men looked at me. Talon rolled his eyes and Buck scowled.
“You need to eat, Layna.” With his good arm, Buck reached for his bag where Talon had dropped it in the entryway.
I jumped to attention. “I’ll get that.”
Buck’s eyes cut to mine and I froze.
“I’m fine,” he said with a steely coldness before walking into the master bedroom.
I was so uncomfortable and nervous, I didn’t know if I should follow him. If Talon hadn’t been standing there, I probably would have.
Talon chuckled but he didn’t look up. His thumbs flew across the screen on his phone. “He told you.”
Jerk. “Screw you.”
Talon laughed, tucked his phone in his pocket then held his hands up. “I give.”
I pushed past him, throwing open the cupboard door to get what I needed to set the table. “Do I have to pick something up or is it being delivered?” I couldn’t stop thinking about what he’d said on the plane. He didn’t mean if I saw anything, he meant anyone.
Talon leaned back against the counter and watched me. “Bein’ delivered.”
“Great.” I stepped around him, dropped the silverware on the table then dumped the plates. I was pissed that Talon had planted the seed of fear. I wasn’t an idiot, I could look out for myself and I had been. For three months, I’d looked for the men who used to follow me everywhere and I’d seen nothing. It was over, that part of my life was done with. I needed to focus on the here and now. Buck was home and he was safe. That’s all that mattered. I bent to grab cloth napkins out of the buffet and when I stood back up, Talon was right there.
“What’s goin’ on?”
“Nothing.”
“Sugar.”
Fine. He asked for it. “I didn’t appreciate that bullshit you pulled on the plane. I told you I haven’t seen anyone following me. Miami is dead.” My parents’ killer wasn’t after me anymore. “I don’t need your advice, especially when Blaze is...” I waved my hand in the air.
Talon took the napkins from me and tossed them on the table. “Breathe, darlin’, it’s all good.”
God damn it. “I am breathing. Let it go, Talon. There’s no one following me. Miami is dead. Buck is home. This conversation is over.”
Talon crossed his arms and stared at me a moment. “You done?”
I sucked in a deep breath, willing a calm I didn’t feel. “Are you?”
He inclined his head toward the kitchen. “Let’s find somethin’ to drink, food’ll be here soon.”
I set out lemonade. I really, really wanted a drink but the few times I drank in front of Buck, it was not received well. Thankfully Talon didn’t say shit about the lemonade. It would’ve sent me over the edge.
By the time the food showed up, Buck was out of the shower and dressed in civilian clothes—white T-shirt and black cargo pants, he still screamed military. He’d ditched the sling and the bandage on his arm looked fresh. He kissed the top of my head and carefully slid into a seat at the table.
“Smells good.” His deep voice was quiet but it cut through the silence.
“Chinese.” Talon sat down. “I’ll cook somethin’ decent tomorrow.”
“You’re staying?” Buck asked casually, reaching for the food one-handed.
After the duffel bag incident, I didn’t dare offer to help Buck put food on his plate.
“Yeah, I’m gonna nurse your sorry ass.”
Buck froze, a spoonful of food midair.
Talon burst out laughing. “You’re not that lucky, Deer Hunter.” He nodded towards me. “Besides, I think Sugar’d have my hide if I stole her thunder.” He winked at me.
“Good, then you can leave tomorrow.” Buck reached for my leg under the table with his injured arm. His huge hand wrapped around my thigh and I forgot about eating.
“Not happenin’,” Talon replied good-naturedly.
Practically hyperventilating from Buck’s touch, it didn’t occur to me to join the conversation, let alone serve myself. Talon heaped food on my plate and Buck’s fingers massaged my thigh.
“Why not?” Buck forked a mouthful of food with his other hand.
“Headin’ to the Keys in the mornin’,” Talon said casually.
Buck hesitated. It was only for a fraction of a second but it was long enough for me to notice. “Roark?” he asked.
Roark was an ex-marine friend of theirs who owned a charter seaplane business based out of Key West. He’d flown us when Talon had tracked my parents’ killer to a yacht in the Keys, putting an end to my three year hell. Talon and Buck’s friend Neil had been waiting for us with his boat when Roark landed in the gulf. We boarded Neil’s boat, Neil took us within sight of the yacht then Talon and Buck swam the last 200 yards and secretly boarded. I didn’t know all the details of Miami’s demise because Buck would never tell me, but an hour later, the yacht was in flames, they were back on Neil’s boat with a woman who had been beaten by Miami and I was a free woman.
Talon shrugged noncommittally. “I’ll make dinner tomorrow night, that way y
ou’ll get at least one decent meal while you’re home.” He grinned at me.
Talon was right, I couldn’t cook worth a damn, but why would he be going to see Roark? “Jerk.”
“Island Girl.”
“Back off, Talon,” Buck warned.
I might’ve smiled.
Buck leaned toward my ear and his hand squeezed my thigh as his warm breath fluttered across my skin. “Eat,” he whispered. “You’re too thin.” His lips brushed against my neck.
Desire curled around my stomach and sunk lower. I pressed my thighs together, inadvertently trapping his hand.
“Eat,” Buck growled.
“C’mon, Sugar, I got yer favorite.” Even though he’d already put some on my plate, Talon shoved the carton of eggplant closer to me.
Suddenly, I was starving. Transference, sexual frustration, call it what you want, I shoveled in a huge mouthful.
Talon smirked and Buck pretended not to notice. After a few bites, Talon asked Buck about some men he knew who were serving with him in Afghanistan. I finished eating and stood to clear the table as they continued to talk. I was putting the leftovers away when I heard Talon ask Buck what happened.
“Zamindawar, Helmand Province.”
“Shiiiiit,” Talon drew the curse out like he knew exactly what Buck was talking about.
“Rounds going over our heads, moving through four-foot-tall brush at night, you know the drill. You couldn’t see shit. Dawn was coming and we needed to get tucked in but air support was twenty minutes out. Firepower coming from all directions, low on ammo, we couldn’t clear the danger area. Then they flanked us and the first RPG went off. I gave the order to move. We didn’t have time to make our own entrance into the compound so I cleared one of their doorways. I thought I was good but a meter in an IED went off.”
“Jesus,” Talon muttered.
“Could’ve been worse,” Buck said matter-of-fact.
My knees buckled and I grabbed the counter.
“No fuckin’ shit,” Talon agreed.
Bile rose in my throat and I thought I would lose dinner.
Buck’s voice dropped to just above a whisper. “I should’ve waited for air support.”
“Were there other casualties?”
“No. I was first in.” Buck sounded dejected.
“Twenty minutes when you’re takin’ fire from all sides is a long time, dude.”
“The sun was almost up. I didn’t think we had twenty minutes. We were four hundred meters out in the middle of a fucking poppy field. There were murder holes everywhere. We were sitting ducks.”
“I would’ve done the same thing,” Talon said quietly.
“Then we’re both dumb as shit.”
Talon chuckled. “Yeah, well, can’t argue with that.”
“What’s been going on here?” Buck asked.
“We’re all good. Neil’s tyin’ up a few loose ends. Nothin’ to be concerned ’bout.”
“Every time you tell me not to be concerned, there’s something I should be concerned about.”
“Not this time.”
I heard a chair slide across the smooth floors and I righted myself.
“Take the pain meds and crash out tonight.”
“Fuck you,” Buck countered.
“You’ll heal faster if you’re not fightin’ it,” Talon argued.
“I’m not fighting shit, I don’t need them,” Buck snapped.
“You always were a stubborn bastard.”
“I learned from the best.”
Talon laughed and I scrambled to finish the dishes.
“Night, Sugar!” Talon called out to me. “And oh, go easy on Deer Hunter.”
Still shaken from hearing what had happened to Buck, I didn’t have a quick jab ready to throw back at Talon for making the stupid sex joke. The guest room door shut with a thud and I wiped my hands. When I turned, Buck was leaning in the doorway to the kitchen.
Six foot four, massive muscles, his head almost to the top of the frame, he was imposing as hell. “I forgot how tall you are.” Now that we were alone, a fresh set of nerves pinged around my body like zaps of electricity.
“And?” He made no move to come closer.
I twisted the dish cloth in my hand. “And what?”
“Say what you need to say,” he stated. “Let’s get this out and move on.”
“Why didn’t you tell me?”
He stared at me a moment. “I was laid out in a hospital bed, doped up on morphine.”
The way he said doped up on morphine, the quick and intense flare of his eyes, for a split second, I felt like I was looking at a stranger—a very angry stranger. Then just as quickly it was gone and I was back wondering why he’d called Talon and not me. “But you called Talon.”
“A guy in my unit texted him.”
“Talon said you called him, he said you didn’t want to come home to me, that you didn’t want to upset me.”
“He lied.”
“So you were coming home to me?”
Buck didn’t answer.
Being stabbed would’ve hurt less. “Ah,” I murmured, averting my eyes.
“I wanted Talon to pick me up at the airport,” he said without apology.
I turned my back to him, wiping the counter I’d already cleaned.
“I was going to stay with him a few days.” Then he dropped the real bomb. “I know how you feel about me being a marine.”
I slowly turned back around, fighting the urge to lash out at him because I’d been the one who’d brought this on. “I know I upset you when I asked you how long you planned on being in the marines, but—”
“I didn’t say that.”
I wished like hell I could take that whole conversation back. “You didn’t have to.” Overwhelming guilt flooded my heart and gripped my stomach, turning it into knots. I’d been so fixated on not wanting him to be who he was, how my life would be easier if he wasn’t a marine, that I never once questioned my part in it. I never asked myself if I was strong enough to be what he needed. “I’m not good enough for you,” I whispered, looking up at him. “I’m sorry.”
“Stop,” he said sternly.
I fought back stupid tears and nodded, thinking he would keep his distance but he held his hand out.
A lungful of air filled my chest and I sucked in desperate hope. Without hesitation, I placed my hand in his and he led us to the bedroom. Stopping in front of the bed, he turned and dropped my hand. Pale blue eyes watched me so intently, I wanted to look away but I didn’t dare.
“Shower. You smell like Talon.”
I winced at the bite in his tone and said the first stupid thing that popped into my head. “My heart belongs to you.” I sounded guilty of something and I was, but not that.
“I’m not showering with you.” He didn’t smile, he didn’t touch me.
“I know you’re injured.” I leaned forward and gently kissed his chest. “Sex isn’t why I love you. Please,” I begged, wanting his forgiveness, wanting this distance between us gone. “Let me take care of you.”
Buck recoiled like I’d hit him.
Damn it. Everything I was saying tonight, I was saying wrong. “Please. I just want to help. For once, I want to be what you need.”
His face darkened.
The sting of rejection mixed with frustration and I couldn’t hold back the annoyance from my voice. “I get it, I’m doing everything wrong.” I needed air or space or just five minutes away from his intensity. I took half a step and he caught my arm.
His grip firm, his voice went quiet. “I didn’t want to overwhelm you at the airport.”
He was so battered. I didn’t want to be doing this with him. I wanted to be in his arms, listening to his heartbeat, fe
eling his breath on my shoulder. “It overwhelmed me more that you didn’t want to come home to me.”
“I made a mistake.”
It was his form of an apology but I was so upset it sounded like he was saying I was a mistake. “It hurt that you thought I was too fragile, that you thought you had to walk on eggshells around me.”
“I should have come to you...” His voice dropped to a tortured whisper. “I wanted to come to you.”
“But?” I held my breath.
“I wanted to protect you.”
My eyes closed briefly and I repeated the words, letting them fill my heart. This was the Buck I knew. This was the protective man I fell in love with. I opened my eyes and cupped his jaw. “You can’t protect me from reality,” I quietly reminded him.
“From my reality, yes, I can.”
I didn’t have a comeback for that because anything I said besides thank you would have been selfish. “I appreciate that,” I said humbly.
“No, you don’t because you don’t understand it, but that’s my point. I never want you to understand it. No woman, especially not my woman, should know combat.”
It was a lot of words for Buck to string together. Not that he wasn’t smart, he was ten times more intelligent than I was, but he wasn’t verbally expressive and he never explained his actions, he owned them.
“Then thank you.” I wasn’t going to point out how that statement would probably make a lot of women’s hackles go straight up. Buck was one hundred percent alpha and I would never change that. I didn’t want to. I loved all of his badass marine alphaness—except when it made him make stupid decisions, like keeping his injuries a secret. “You need sleep. Let’s just go to bed.”
Something dark swirled in his eyes and he grasped the back of my neck. His fingers threaded through my hair, his hand fisted and with a gentle tug, my head fell back. His eyes fixed on mine, he leaned down and met my lips.
I groaned the second his tongue darted in to tease mine. My hands found his waist and I slid my fingers to the top button on his pants.
He abruptly pulled back but tightened his hold on my hair. “I don’t need you to take care of me,” he said fiercely.