by S. B. Niccum
Part III ~ The Vision
Chapter 36
“Tess … Tess?” a familiar voice called.
I opened my eyes and saw a woman standing over me; she had shiny golden hair and gray stormy eyes. I rubbed my eyes, but it had no effect. In fact I didn’t feel anything at all! The pain in my head, the stinging and burning of my eyes … all gone! And I could see perfectly again!
“Welcome.”
I narrowed my eyes, “you look familiar.”
“I’m Celeste, your grandmother.”
“You look young.”
“We all look the same age now.”
“Now? What do you mean by now?” I looked around me, but I saw nothing but a thick white fog. There was bright sunlight all around, but nothing else. “Am I dead? Where’s Alex?”
Celeste straightened out and gave me room to stand up. “Your life hangs in the balance,” she said mysteriously.
“What balance?”
“The one between life and death. I was sent here to greet you.” She swept an arm out wanting me to follow her in the direction that her arm was pointing. Hesitantly, I followed her through the whiteness. It was thick and somewhat shimmery, like the creatures that guarded Dorian while … while … “Dorian! What happened to Dorian?”
“He is fine.”
This brought me relief, but not much. I still had so many un-answered questions. “Celeste?” I inquired, but she seemed to ignore me as she floated forward with determination.
Finally a huge gate appeared in front of us. She stopped in front of it with a smirk on her face. “The pearly gates.”
Indeed the gate had a pearly shimmer to it, it looked metal, but unlike any metal I’d ever seen.
“So, what now?”
“You choose.”
I stared at her in bewilderment. “Choose what?”
“Do you go back or continue forward?”
“Forward as in die?”
She nodded solemnly and waited for my reply.
“I want to move forward. I want to be with Alex!” I said at once. Of course what else?
She made a slight twitch with her features that warned me that there was something wrong. “What? What is it? Where’s Alex? Why isn’t he here?” I asked with suspicion.
“He is not here,” a booming voice came from behind me and I turned to face a young Admiral gliding toward me.
“Russell?”
He smiled and with a fatherly gesture embraced me. “Yes, handsome, right?” He laughed.
“Very!” I couldn’t help smiling. “But why do you say, that he is not here? Where is he?”
The two angels looked at each other exchanging glances. “What?” I snapped with annoyance.
“He went after Leo, your father,” Russell said with one raised eyebrow.
“Where?” I asked bewildered.
“Hell,” Celeste added bluntly. “For not heeding our advice.”
“Alex is in hell?”
“And your father too.”
I shook my head. “Why aren’t you guys getting them out? You can’t leave them there!”
They said nothing, instead they exchanged cryptic glances.
“I’ll go then! I’ll get them out!” I said propelling myself forward toward the gate.
“It’s not that simple, Tess.” Russell stopped me before I touched the gate. “Think about what you are about to do! If you touch those gates, that’s it! There is no going back. Think about Robyn. Dane and Valerie are aging, they are tired and they were not left in charge of Robyn. You were!”
“Alex and I were,” I corrected. “Who’s to say that I’ll be a good mother?”
“I say.” Katie came out from the whiteness with Jase right behind her.
“I’m sorry, Katie, but, Alex … ”
“I know,” she said with a worried look. “But what about my baby, what about Robyn? ”
I couldn’t argue with her. I felt all the worry and concern that she had over her daughter and I was reminded of the love I felt for her too. I thought of myself at that age, the same age I was when my parents died and I ended up in foster care. I remembered my solemn vow not to ever let a child of mine go through that.
“You and Dorian would be great with her,” Jase said with a hopeful grin. “We would like for the two of you to raise her.”
“What about Alex and my father?” I looked around for any volunteers. “Celeste, that’s your son!”
“I know,” she said significantly. “I will do all I can, believe me.”
“What is there to do? You just go get them.”
“It’s not that easy, Tess. Hell is not just a place; it’s a state of being too. Once you’re in there … ” The Admiral started.
“It’s hard to come back,” Celeste finished. “All your darkest moments, fears and thoughts come back to haunt you and keep you from moving on. Only the most prepared and trained Angels can enter and make it out.”
“Why did Leo and Alex end up there?” My heart felt like it had something tight tied around it, something that was constricting and choking it.
“Leo and Alex broke the rules, Heavenly rules, I might add,” Russell explained. “They haunted two human beings, and one of them killed himself because of it.”
“But Eros was already half crazy, I’m sure … ”
“Crazy or not, he killed himself and it was in part because of Leo’s actions.” Celeste looked heartbroken over this, but not enough to risk going in there after him.
“I can’t believe it! I would go in there after them. Why won’t either one of you do it!” I looked at Russell and Celeste accusatorily.
“Are you telling us to go to hell?” Russell leered.
“Yes! I’m telling you to go to hell! I’m telling you to go get them or I will!”
“No! Please Tess!” Katie begged.
Trapped—I felt trapped between two very impossible choices.
“I will go, Tess.” Russell closed his eyes and exhaled a breath that he no longer had. “But I have to prepare first. I won’t go there to get Alex and Leo, just to get stuck there myself! Alex went in there unprepared, said the same thing you did just now, and look at him now; he’s trapped there too!”
I shook my head and wished I could cry. How did this get so messed up? “If I go back down and raise Robyn, Alex will be stuck in hell for years!”
“Time on Earth goes by a lot quicker than you think!” Katie put a positive twist. “Look!” She pointed to a whole or a space that had parted through the whiteness right in front of us, and I could see me lying on a hospital bed, my head was bandaged up and my left hand as well. Dorian was sitting next to me; he looked intact. No doubt everyone thought it a miracle—and it was. He was drawing something; his tongue was sticking out as it usually did when he concentrated.
It was strange to be this close to my inert body and to Dorian. Could it be that the realm of the dead was right here occupying the same space, just differently? I always imagined it to be up above somewhere.
“How long has it been?”
“A whole week has passed since you were in that fire,” Katie responded.
“It doesn’t seem that long.”
“That is why it is so imperative that you go back and take care of my baby,” she pleaded once more.
I turned back to Katie and nodded. She jumped in my arms and hugged me, I could tell that she was squeezing me as tight as she could, but I felt nothing. Then Katie, the whiteness and the whole scene melted away and all I could feel was pain; sharp, stinging pain all over my body and especially in my head.
Oh no I’m back! I thought with dread. I felt my lungs exhale and that too hurt. I moved my hand trying to reach for Dorian’s arm. I must have startled him because he temporarily withdrew his hand, then slowly enclosed it back around my own and squeezed it gently.
“D—or—an,” I tried to speak, but my throat was dry and hoarse.
Next thing I know I had a straw placed right up against my lips and I was t
rying to swallow some water. I felt it go down as if it were filled with sand.
“Is she awake?” a male voice asked. Having these bandages around my face was so annoying! My eyes! I remembered how my eyes were damaged during Agatha’s torture.
“Tess, can you hear me?”
I nodded in reply.
“I am John—John Argyle from Social Services. I know this is bad timing, but … ”
A smile spread across my face at the sound of that voice. “I thought you had to be elsewhere?”
“Well, I have one lose end to tie before I leave.”
John … Argyle, as he called himself now, was my social worker. I was glad that I didn’t have to explain myself to an ‘actual’ social worker, I doubt that they would have found me and my antics fit to parent Robyn.
Mathoniaha came too for a short visit. He was also on his way out of town to another mission, he was going to Libya. “Will I ever see either one of you again?”
“Oh … I think so. We have this annoying tendency of popping up all over the place.” Mathoniaha remarked.
Thanks to John, I was cleared to gain full custody of Robyn. My eyesight never fully recovered and I couldn’t see without thick, ugly glasses. I tried to get the cutest frames possible, but it was hard to hide the thickness of the lenses. If I read too much, my eyes got tired and gave me headaches, so I learned to read Braille and saved my vision for sewing. Everyone at work attributed my bout with craziness as part of my grieving, and soon forgot all about it. Things went back to normal rather quickly and life continued on.
Agatha died in that fire, her body was found burned to a crisp. The members of her society that survived the fire denied ever being members of a society at all and any evidence of a secret society burned in the fire along with its Priestess. The survivors claimed that they had been there for a social gathering and while drinking cocktails; some candles fell down and started a fire. Though their statements had inconsistencies, no one could prove that there was any foul play.
Eugenia was among the survivors, but her hair was singed. I, on the other hand, suffered no burns. The beam fell on me and rendered me unconscious, Mathoniah, then butler, pulled me out before the firemen got there.
I was mad that so many of those evil people got away scot-free, but there was nothing I could do about it. Needless to say, I at least knew who not to vote for in the next election, and became very involved in the campaigns of their contestants. Marcel’s rock-and-roll career dwindled, and he ended up a washed up druggie. He died of an overdose, ten years later.
Eugenia’s hair never grew back well, so she ended up using wigs. She had no fancy career on T.V. and no fame, and to get her out of their house, her parents bought her a Bed and Breakfast in Maine where she lived there the rest of her life.
The others disappeared more or less into obscurity. Somehow the fire in that house put a damper on their collective plans; separate, they were less of a threat to the world. So in essence I did fulfill my mission. I feel more or less like Paul of old who said: “I’ve fought a good fight, I have finished the race.”
Of all the ones I’ve loved in this life, Robyn alone remains. She turned out to have a knack for fashion, like me. Maybe it was all that time she spent with me at the shop growing up. She now runs DeLeon Fashions and has taken the business to a new level of recognition. Every once in a while she runs things by me, but for the most part I am now out of it.
Katie had been right about Dorian. He turned out to be a great father figure for Robyn. They were the best of friends; patiently and without many words, he taught her a million things. He was a great gardener and kept the Preston’s residence in perfect shape. He started a garden in the back and built a tree house for Robyn. He planted flowers in abundance and everything that he touched bloomed like a Thomas Kinkade painting. Valerie spent many peaceful hours painting the fruits of Dorian’s labors.
Dorian never went back to Mexico, Luz died in her sleep soon after I got out of the hospital. She simply stopped breathing and Amor found her the next morning with a smile on her face and her hands clasped around a seashell that Dorian had given her. We visited Amor and Paz frequently, Dorian would wander the beach alone and I could see him talking to himself as he did so. We left him alone; we hoped he talked to Luz. A few years later, Amor’s ex-husband came to visit her and never left.
Dane died three years after the accident, of heart failure. As Valerie predicted, we wore him out with our craziness. With Valerie I never had to pretend, sometimes the house would fill with music and I knew it was Estelle who had stopped by, I would say that much to Valerie, and she would simply ask what song she was singing—then she would turn on the record player and play that song all night.
I welcome death. Not like I once did … out of fear; but rather, it feels like the next logical stage of existence. Now that they are all gone, I live alone with only ghosts for company—all but one … Sometimes, though, I can feel a yearning or a groan from Alex as if he were trying to reach me. I have tried to hold on to it, but it’s always elusive and it passes by too quickly. I wonder what demons he has to face that keep him tied in hell. Is it guilt or remorse? Are they all real and valid concerns or figments of his insecurities?
I have hounded Celeste with questions when she stops by, but she has remained tight lipped and obstinate about it all. She has given me no new information and has leaked no more clues about what the other side is like. She must have gotten more training.
John and Mathoniaha have stopped by a few times. As expected, neither one of them has aged a day; while Robyn grew and I got old, they have stayed the same. Their eyes, though, give them away—their eyes look ancient and seem to hold the wisdom of centuries. I told them about Alex and Leo; John especially was very troubled by this, but they have no experience on what goes on the other side—they’re experts on life, not death.
I spend my winters in Mexico now, for memory’s sake. And in this solitary state, I recall my life. It seems that it has started with a dream and it will end with another.
The dappled sunlight filters from the French doors and warms my cheek while the sweet melody of Cannon in D reaches my ears as it once did so many years ago. My mind drifts to a distant place, a place without bodily aches; a place where Luz sits at the piano wearing a white tutu, and her dad bends over with his hands over hers, while together they follow the piano keys along the familiar tune.
The bright sunlight engulfs me now, I open my eyes and they are all there. I close my eyes again, knowing that my weak eyesight fools me and when I open them again they are all gone.
The briny ocean breeze bids me good-bye and the dining room fills once again with the familiar faces who quietly enjoy each others’ company. They enjoy a well-deserved respite from life; but I find that I miss that salty breeze and that warm sun. Part of me yearns to have it back.
“Tessss … Tesss …” his groans rouse me.
“Alex?” I ask perplexed because his voice sounds so close.
I spent the majority of my adult life feeling his call, his anxiety, and his pleas, but have been unable to do anything about them.
Celeste recognizes my presence in that familiar room and reaches out to me. I look back at her and she knows …
“No Tess! Not yet!” she calls after me. But I find that I’m faster than I’ve ever been. I charge out of the room, not towards the beckoning light, but in the other direction.
The shadows engulf me, “I’m coming Alex! I’m coming for you!”
~In memory of Tony Scott~
About the Author
Silvina B. Niccum was born in Rosario, Argentina and raised in Buenos Aires. Her family immigrated to the US, when she was fourteen. She attended the University of Utah and studied Spanish Literature. Silvina now lives in Dallas, TX with her husband and her three homeschooled children.
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Veiled
The first book of the Veiled Series.
"I have always existed, not just me
but all of us, the unembodied spirits who wait to live.”
Tess is an unborn spirit, who is about to embark on a much awaited journey into mortality to a brand new planet called Earth. She is chosen by the Eternals for an important mission, and is put under a rigorous training by a half-human, half-lion Seraph. This training exposes Tess to some of her darkest fears and insecurities. These experiences force Tess to work on her gift as a discerner of thoughts and reader of auras—thus helping her become one of Heaven’s most powerful angels. But even angels falter, and deep inside her a gnawing fear is growing.
Available at online booksellers and at
http://www.sbniccum.com
What others are saying about
Veiled
“This is a captivating journey of life before earth or birth. At look at before we are born where were we, what did we do, what happened before … now. The characters Tess and Alex along with the rest are so well -human. Having situations or trials even before birth that we can completely relate to, root for or sympathize with. This book captures your imagination and keeps your attention throughout. Wow a new idea, now where's the sequel!”
~ M. McElveen
“I absolutely loved this book. I am not a true sci-fi fan, I usually stick to a good romance novel, but I was intrigued by the story line. I loved the creativity of the author … the symbolism and magical elements, with just enough romance to keep me reading long into the night. I recommend this book to someone looking for a little supernatural minus the vampires. I can't wait for the sequel! Please don't make us wait too long! Well done.”