by E. L. Todd
He smiled at her. “I like your hat.”
“Huh?”
“You look really cute.”
“Oh.” She touched the brim then brought her hands to her sides. She wasn’t sure what to do with them. She always felt awkward around Blaise. The nervousness never seemed to go away.
He wiped his hands on his jeans then approached her.
She kept staring at him.
His hands moved around her waist and held her close. The feel of his touch was heaven. His hands fit around her waist perfectly, cupping her slim lines. He rubbed his nose against hers and made her feel soft and weak.
When she realized what was happening, she stepped back. “No.”
He raised an eyebrow. “No?”
“I know what you’re doing.”
“And what would that be?”
She turned away from him. “Put on a shirt.”
“It’s hot.”
Alexandra went to the next irrigation pump and turned the wheel.
“Allow me,” he said. He grabbed it and turned it in a flash. He kept positioning himself in her line of sight.
“Sex isn’t going to erase everything,” she said.
“Who said anything about sex?” His smile was wider than she’d ever seen it.
She grabbed his shirt from the ground and threw it at him.
“Well, at least it’s working.”
Alexandra ignored him and moved to the next pump.
Blaise pulled the shirt over his head then followed behind her.
“I don’t need help, Blaise.”
“I know you don’t.”
“Then leave,” she said firmly.
“While I have faith in your abilities, I just want to check everything. If anything goes wrong, it could cost Martha’s livelihood.”
“Why do I feel like that has nothing to do with it?”
He shrugged. “You’re the one who keeps thinking about sex.”
She rolled her eyes then continued across the field.
“So, how are you?” he asked.
“The same,” she said quietly.
“Anything new in your life? How’s the hospital?”
“It’s okay,” she said. “Dr. Kenley still has it out for me.”
“I can mess him up.”
“Why is that your solution to everything?”
“It’s not,” Blaise said. “Gabe is still breathing, isn’t he?”
“You need to leave him alone.”
“No,” he snapped. “That guy crowds you. It’s like he’s suffocating you.”
“I can take care of myself.”
Blaise moved in front of her. “Just be honest with me. Do you have feelings for him?”
Alexandra shook her head. “Of course not.”
He breathed a sigh of relief. “You promise?”
Her eyes narrowed. “I shouldn’t have to promise anything. Unlike you, my word is good enough.”
“I never said it wasn’t.”
Alexandra finished examining the rows before she went into the warehouse. Blaise followed her then grabbed two waters from the refrigerator.
“Let’s go into the loft.”
“No,” she said quickly.
“Come on,” he said.
“No,” she repeated.
“You don’t trust me?” he asked.
Alexandra didn’t trust herself.
He handed her a water. “I think you should ask Gabe to back off.”
“Blaise, just stay out of it.”
“You realize he’s trying to swoop in, right?”
“I’m not totally blind.”
“Then you should talk to him,” he said seriously.
Alexandra sighed. “I’ll handle it.”
“Or I can handle it for you.”
She stared him down. “Blaise, we aren’t together anymore. I want you to leave me alone.”
“We are together.”
“Please stop doing this to me.”
“Doing what?”
“You’re hurting me. I’m not changing my mind, Blaise. I can’t be with someone I don’t trust.”
“You can trust me!”
She gripped her hair. “We’re going in circles.” She left the warehouse and walked back to the house.
“Alexandra, wait.” He ran and caught up to her. “I know you don’t want to be with me anymore, and I completely understand why. I don’t chase girls very often. It’s usually the other way around. But I can’t just let you go. Not when I did nothing wrong.”
She crossed her arms over her chest. “Then explain everything to me.”
He sighed. “You know I can’t do that.”
“Blaise, I never want to see you again unless you can explain yourself. I mean it.”
“I don’t know when that will be. I’m afraid you’ll move on with someone else before I get the chance.”
She stared him down. “Then I suggest you hurry.”
Blaise took a deep breath. “Can we still be friends until that time arrives?”
“No,” she said quickly. “I can’t be friends with someone I’m in love with. It just makes every day unbearable.”
“I’m not trying to hurt you,” he said gently.
“Then do as I ask.”
“I—I can’t.”
“Instead of spending all this time trying to taunt me, you should focus your efforts on fixing all your personal drama.” She walked up the steps. “I mean it.”
He stayed rooted to the spot and watched her walk inside. “Alexandra.”
Against her will, she stopped and turned around. He was the only person who said her full name, and when he did, it made her spin shiver. “What?”
“I love you.” He took a deep breath while he stared at her, his eyes coating with tears that wouldn’t fall. His strong frame was shattered underneath him. Even though he stood under the bright sun, he seemed like a shadow. He was an empty vessel, his essence spilt on the ground below his feet. He waited for her to say the words back.
“And I you.” She walked inside and shut the door.
Chapter Four
When Alexandra walked back into the house, breakfast was sitting on the table. Aunt Martha was reading the newspaper, her glasses perched on her nose. She had a pad on her lower back to cushion her against the chair.
Alexandra sighed when she sat down.
“It’s a little early in the day to be in such a bad mood.”
Alexandra ate her pancakes, her eyes downcast.
“So, what’s up?”
She sighed.
“You’ve been keeping too many secrets. Spill it.”
“Paul is here.”
Martha put down the newspaper. “Your ex-boyfriend, Paul?
“The only Paul we know.”
“What’s he want?”
“He says I need to go back to New York with him.”
“Are you back together?” Martha asked.
“No,” she said quickly. “But…we’re talking, I guess.”
Aunt Martha smiled. “You seem confused.”
“Well, Paul said we only broke up because I ruined the relationship. And as much as I hate to admit it, he’s right. I pushed him away until I caused the break. But when I came here, I wasn’t expecting to meet Blaise. I just don’t know what to do.”
“Why did you push Paul away?”
Alexandra pushed her pancakes around the plate.
“Seriously, you aren’t going to tell me? It’s been months, Alex. Just spill it.”
“I killed someone.” She kept her eyes glued to her plate.
Aunt Martha stared at her.
“It was an accident.”
“Tell me what happened.”
Alexandra told her the entire story.
“Dear, you didn’t kill anyone.”
“That’s what everyone keeps saying,” she mumbled.
“Because it’s true. And even if it wasn’t, don’t just give up every time you aren’t perfect at somethi
ng. Medicine isn’t absolute. There are conditions that can’t always be fixed. You did the best job you could do under the circumstances. Now let it go. You need to be strong.”
“It’s not that easy.”
“Make it easy, then.”
Alexandra couldn’t look at her aunt.
“Was your license taken away?”
“No,” Alexandra said.
“Were you suspended?”
“No…”
“Was there any legal action taken against you?”
“No.”
“Well, if you did do something wrong, I’m sure you would have been sued for it,” Martha said. “Or the hospital would have. So there’s your proof. The board would have taken away your license if they thought it was due to negligence.”
“But what if it happens again?”
“It will,” Martha said simply.
Alexandra looked up, confused.
“You’re a nurse. People are going to die. You act like this is brand new information.”
“I know but—”
“But what?” she said. “You knew this before you became a nurse. No excuses, Alex. Now go back to work and learn from your experiences.”
“You make it sound so easy.”
“And you make it more difficult than it needs to be.” She crossed her arms over her chest and stared her down.
“Why do you have to be so hard all the time?”
“Because you’re my niece. I’m not going to let you accept failure, at least for a reason like that. I sympathize with you and your experience, but it’s been months, Alexandra. You need to get back to work.”
Alexandra put down her fork. “I understand.”
Martha picked up her newspaper again. “Where’s Paul staying?”
“At a hotel.”
“How long?”
Alexandra shrugged. “Until he finally decides to leave.”
“I have a feeling he’ll be around for a while.” She turned the page of the paper. “Invite him to stay for a while. He’ll go through his savings if he’s here that long.”
“Uh…I think he’s okay.”
“That’s very rude not to invite him.”
“Well, there’s no room.”
“There’s a couch,” she said. “And I doubt he has a kitchen. He probably eats out for every meal. That’s definitely unsettling. Invite him, Alex.”
“You don’t have to do him any favors.”
“I thought you cared for this boy?”
“Well, of course.”
“Then he’s always welcome here.” Martha folded the paper and started working on the crossword.
Alexandra didn’t know what to do. She had a feeling having Paul there wouldn’t be a good idea.
Chapter Five
Blaise was going insane without Alexandra. No matter what he did, he couldn’t convince her to come back to him. His only hope was Danielle.
“We need to talk,” he said when he came into the living room.
“About what?” She turned off the TV and looked at him.
“I want you to move to California.”
Her eyes widened. “What the hell is in California?”
“I know Evan isn’t.”
She rolled her eyes. “You’re unbelievable. I’m not leaving all my friends and family. Forget it.”
“You could take your family with you.”
“No.”
He wanted to scream. “I’ll buy you a beautiful house, and one for your parents. You can start over in a new place, pursue anything you want. Evan will never find you. It sounds like a pretty damn good idea.”
“I’m not leaving,” she said firmly.
“So, I’m stuck with you. That’s it?”
She shrugged. “I don’t see any other option.”
He sighed. “If you think this is a good way of seducing me, you’re sadly mistaken.”
“Well, it obviously doesn’t take much. Your girlfriend is ugly as shit.”
He glared at her. “Don’t fucking talk about her like that.”
“Well, she is.”
“You’re lucky I don’t hit women.”
“Even if you did, she couldn’t look worse than she does now.”
Blaise clenched his fists in anger. “You better leave her alone.”
“I do what I want.”
“I mean it, Danielle. You talk to her or even look at her, I’ll kick you out.”
She rolled her eyes. “Sure.”
“I protect you because it’s the right thing to do, but if you try to hurt Alexandra or make her life more difficult, then I don’t care. If you ask me to pick her or you, it will always be her. Every time.”
“Yet you still live with me.”
“For now,” he snapped.
“Like I said, I’m not going anywhere.”
“Danielle, I’m being serious. Either move to California or move out of my house. Either way, you’re leaving.”
Danielle leaned back on the couch.
“Pick,” he snapped.
“No. I’m staying here.”
He sighed. “Fine. Pack your shit and get out of my house.”
“So Evan can come after me?”
He slammed his fist on the coffee table. “I’ve done everything I can to do what’s right for you, but now you’re just ruining my life. And what’s worse is, you’re doing it on purpose. I’m not putting up with it anymore. You are leaving, and you are telling Alexandra the truth.”
“The truth?” she asked.
“Yes, that you only live here because of Evan. Nothing has happened between us in months. I need her to trust me if I want to get her back.”
“And what makes you think I would help you?”
He glared at her. “You’re such a fucking bitch.”
She shrugged. “I’m not giving you up.”
“I’m already gone, Danielle.”
She stared him down.
“I’ll tell her the truth. She’ll believe me. I know she will.”
Danielle looked away. “I’m not leaving. You’ll have to drag me out.”
“So be it. I’m not losing the greatest thing in my life.” He walked into her bedroom and started to pack her things.
“What the hell are you doing?”
He turned to her. “You thought I was kidding?”
She grabbed the clothes and put them back into the drawers. “Fuck you, Blaise.”
He moved to a different dresser and started to pull everything out.
“Stop it!” She started to cry. “Please don’t leave me, Blaise. I’m sorry, okay? I’m sorry.”
“Your tears mean nothing to me.” He wasn’t going to fall for her act anymore. She didn’t deserve his compassion. Blaise kept tossing everything on the bed.
“I said stop!”
“If you just tell Alexandra the truth, we can work something out. She probably wouldn’t care if you lived with me. She’s a sweet girl. She would understand my involvement in protecting you. She would probably even admire me for it.”
Danielle said nothing, letting the tears stream down her face.
“Danielle, do it. There’s no possibility of us ever getting back together, so if you say no, you are just doing it to make me miserable.”
She wiped her tears away. “No.”
“I seriously fucking hate you.” He threw more clothes onto the bed. “You should call your parents and tell them you’re coming.”
She sat on the bed. “No.”
“Are you a fucking child?” he snapped.
She crossed her arms over her chest.
“Whatever. I’ll drop you off anyway. I really don’t care.” He threw everything onto the bed then grabbed boxes from the garage. She remained still, crying while he packed everything. When everything was ready, he came back to her bedroom and stared at her. “We can do this the easy way or the hard way.”
She stared at the wall.
“Fine.” He grabbed her by the arm but she yanked it
away. He grabbed her again but she slapped him. He took a deep breath and controlled his anger. He never wanted to hit a woman more in his life. Somehow he kept it back. “I’ll call the cops if I have to, Danielle. But that would be extremely embarrassing for you.”
She glared at him.
He grabbed his phone from his pocket. “I’m dialing.”
“I’m not leaving.”
He put his thumb over the call button.
“Stop,” she said.
He looked at her. “Come to your senses?”
“Can we talk about this?”
“We’ve been talking about it for the past hour.”
“Please let me stay,” she said quietly. “I don’t want to leave. I love you.”
“I’m in love with someone else.”
She sniffed. “Please don’t say that to me.”
“If you really love me, you would help me fix my relationship with Alexandra. Life isn’t selfish, Danielle. And that’s all you’re being—selfish.”
“I just want another chance.”
“Never,” he said firmly. “Now please help me make this right.”
“No.”
“I’ll still protect you from Evan. We both get what we want.”
“No. If she doesn’t trust you for being the man you are, then she doesn’t deserve you.”
“Who could blame her, Danielle? I don’t look very good in this situation.”
“She should still have faith.”
He stared at her. “When you told her I cheated on you, that didn’t give her any reason to trust me. You want me all to yourself but it isn’t going to work.”
She covered her face with her hands. “I can’t believe this.”
“And this evil plan of yours wasn’t going to work forever. Surely, you can’t be that surprised.”
Danielle held her hands together tightly, fidgeting in place. She looked around the room and stared at the wall. They shared the bedroom for almost a year. They had a lot of memories in that place.
“Come on.” He extended his hand to her.
She stared at it for a long time before she took it.
Chapter Six
It took a long time to get Danielle to go inside. She didn’t want to leave Blaise, but he refused to let her stay. It was time for him to take his life back. As soon as she was gone, he would go to Alexandra and try to win her back.