by Keri Lake
“She left you because you discovered her truth.” He kept on as I stared down at the paisley-patterned rug beneath my chair, trying to wrap my head around everything he’d told me. “That’s what she does. The moment I confronted her, she escaped through a low-level ward by manipulating the staff. I don’t know what purpose you may have served in the course of your time together, but I can assure you, without a doubt, that it was merely to give her some footing.”
“It doesn’t make sense that she would risk her life, allowing herself to be kidnapped by some fucking depraved psychopath for a fake porn video.”
“Perhaps you don’t know the extent of mental illness. In her mind, all of it is as real as you sitting in my office right now and hearing the truth you’re obviously choosing to deny.”
I shut out the fucked-up picture he was painting by clamping my eyes, and breathed hard through my nose. “That’s it, then. You’ve fed me your bullshit, so now I’ll leave.” Eyes snapping open again, I pushed up from my chair, needing to get the hell out of there. Needing to get as far away from that crazy shit as possible.
“I’m asking you for one favor, Mister Wolfe. And please consider the consequences, if you decide to ignore it. In the off chance that she does return to you, I’m asking you to contact me immediately, without letting her know you’ve done it.”
“And what are the consequences, if I don’t?”
“You’ll be considered an accomplice to murder and face charges for harboring an escaped mental patient.”
“Well, I guess you better pray she comes back to me, then.”
“Off the record, I do care what happens. I did fall in love with her.” He tapped his finger against the desk, not bothering to look up at me. “You can find your way out, I presume.”
Without answering I strode out of his office, counting off the steps to the elevator like a time bomb waiting to go off. Every muscle in my body quaked with the urge to do something stupid and reckless. To put my fist through a wall and steal a moment of distraction from the thoughts hammering my skull.
Maybe Nicoleta was right, after all. Maybe forgetting everything was the better option, because I sure as hell didn’t want to remember the last thirty minutes.
A simple search on the internet led me to Doctor Harrison, a surgeon for Detroit General in downtown. A few more clicks showed pictures from a charity ball, and beside him, his wife, Dawn. My stomach twisted at the sight of her long blonde hair, which bore a striking resemblance to Nicoleta’s. She’d apparently gone on to pursue an administrative job at her husband’s satellite practice in Birmingham.
Decked out in some fancy ball gown, surrounded by men in tuxes, she looked important. Respected.
No way an upstanding chick like that would dare sit down with me to chat about a porn video she’d made back in her freshman year. I probably wouldn’t even get one foot in the door.
Unfortunately, I knew one person who would, and I hated what I might have to do to get her help.
Seemed like every cop showed up at Donna’s for coffee and donuts in the morning. I sat out front with a variety bag and two coffees in hand, edgy as hell, my blood sputtering with tension as I waited. Dealing with Nancy was tricky business on a good day. Pushing forty, she tended to be self-conscious, and although she had a thing about being dominated when it came to sex, she liked control. No doubt, my rejecting her twice would’ve played on her emotions, and the things I’d said after had probably landed my sorry ass onto her blacklist.
Three patrol cars had already pulled in and left before I thought about throwing in the towel, and forgetting the whole damn thing.
Wasn’t until the fourth parked in the spot right in front of me that shit really kicked up in my stomach.
Both doors of the cruiser opened, and Nancy and another younger male officer exited.
“I’ll catch you inside,” she said to the kid, as he eyed me up and down before making his way into the donut shop. “What do you want?” Damn the venom in her voice telling me she was still pissed off at me.
“To grovel like a bitch and ask your forgiveness.”
“I don’t do forgiveness, and groveling’s a turn off.” She stepped past me to go inside, but I grabbed her arm. Lowering her sunglasses showed me the threat in her eyes, and I cleared my throat.
“I need your help.”
“Oh. How sweet. I don’t do favors, anymore, either.”
“Believe me when I say, you’re the last person I’d come to.”
She backed up a step, and when she crossed her arms, I felt the first twinge of hope. “I’m listening.”
“I need you to come with me. I gotta ask this doctor’s wife some questions, and I need it to look official so she’ll take me seriously.”
Her head kicked back with a humorless laugh. “You’re asking me to bastardize my uniform, so you can harass a doctor’s wife?”
“That’s not what I said.” I prodded a finger toward her and shook my head. “You know that’s not what I said. I found some bad shit on the internet. Think she might know something about it.”
Lowering her brows, she tipped her head, and, at a guess, only morbid curiosity prompted her to keep asking questions. “What kind of bad shit?”
“Snuff film. Supposed to be fake, but I don’t know for sure.”
She glanced around and leaned in. “Do you know how much deep shit this would put me in, if someone found out?”
“Probably as much as your husband finding out we’ve been fucking each other for the last two years.”
Her eyes narrowed on me, one twitching at the corner. “Are you blackmailing me?”
“I’m doing whatever it takes to find some answers on the girl in the video.”
“And I’m assuming you’re going to report said video to the proper authorities.”
“If it’s even real.”
Arms still crossed, she stared off across the lot for what seemed like minutes. Every second marked the frantic beat of my heart, wondering if she’d decide to lock me up, instead. At last, her tongue swept across her lips, and she cleared her throat, lifting her gaze to mine once more. “Fine. But after this, I want you out of my life. No more favors.”
I blew out an easy breath and ran my hands through my hair. “I really am sorry about the other night. I didn’t mean that shit. I’ve just been a little fucked in the head.”
“I see that. Watching snuff? That’ll throw your ass into some hot water. Stay away from it.”
“I wasn’t watching it for kicks, Nancy.”
“I hope not.” Staring back at me, she bit her lip and swiped the bag of donuts from my hand. “I’d hate to think I was fucking a murdering psychopath all that time.”
35
Dax
“Since when did you get a partner?” I asked from the passenger seat of the patrol car, as we headed in the direction of Detroit General’s satellite office.
Nancy didn’t bother to look at me, her jaw still set to a grudging stiffness. “I always have a partner on night patrol. I’m typically off duty when we’ve fucked. But Colton is new. I’m showing him the ropes.”
I snorted and hiked an elbow onto the passenger door beside me. “Ropes, or chains?”
“Very funny. I don’t fuck colleagues, for your information.”
“Just the thugs, right?”
Ignoring me, she kept her eyes on the road, knuckles white enough to let me know she didn’t like any part of the plan. “I’m going to make this clear. If this goes beyond a simple inquiry, and this woman ends up going to my superior? I’m gonna shoot you with my own gun.”
“Is that a threat?”
“Fact.” She shot me a no-bullshit glance. “You better keep your cool and make it quick.”
We reached the outpatient facility, and she parked the cruiser on the side of the building, out of sight.
Nancy lagged a few steps behind, as I strolled in and approached the receptionist at the front desk.
“I’m here to see Mr
s. Dawn Richardson?”
Lips pursed, the receptionist entwined her fingers. “May I ask your name?”
“I’m Detective Wolfe, and this is Officer Daniels.” Fuck, I didn’t even know if patrol cops did this shit with investigators, but she bought it, dialing up to the office on her phone.
“She’ll be right down.”
Minutes later, a petite woman in her early twenties, wearing a canary yellow business suit and matching pumps, entered the lobby, her eyes flitting from mine to Nancy’s.
“Can I help you … officers?” Her bright red lips glistened, and at a flash of them wrapped around Kenny’s micro-dick, I flinched and stifled the urge to shiver.
I cleared my throat and stepped toward her. “We’re investigating a hit and run that happened in front of the building last night, and wondered if we might ask you some questions?”
Her face pinched with confusion. “Oh. I … had no idea. Certainly, we have some conference rooms to the right.” Dawn twisted around to the receptionist behind her. “Jill, hold my calls for …” She glanced back at us. “Twenty minutes, or so, officers?” At my nod, she led Nancy and I down the hall, to a set of rooms, only one of which was occupied, and I noticed I couldn’t hear any of the conversation inside.
“What the fuck are you doing?” Nancy whispered through her clenched teeth, as the two of us entered first.
“Relax. No surprises.” I took a seat on one of the chairs set around a small table inside, followed by Nancy and Dawn, and pulled out a pen and notepad. “Hey, do you mind closing the blinds?”
Forehead still creased in confusion, Dawn stood up and drew the blinds, before returning to her seat.
“Mrs. Richardson, we’re very sorry to interrupt your day. I promise we’ll make this quick.” Nancy sat forward in her chair, her body stiff and guarded, as though she’d poised to run any second.
“We’re investigating the death of a young girl. Does the name Jasper Horn mean anything to you?” Tipping my head, I studied her eyes, the subtle way they flickered in response.
Dawn’s lips pursed as she swallowed a gulp and blinked. “I’m …. Excuse me, what did you say?”
“Jasper Horn? We think he might be responsible for her murder.”
“This … hit and run … happened out in front of the building, you say?”
I sniffed and kept my gaze from Nancy, who was probably about two seconds from yanking me out of the room. “This isn’t about a hit and run. I think you know what it’s about, and for the sake of your reputation, I’m trying to be discreet.”
With a roll of her shoulders, she stretched her lips into an obviously fake smile. “My apologies, Detective. I don’t recall seeing your badge.”
“Left it in the car.” A hard thump hit my leg where Nancy kicked me.
“I’m afraid I cannot answer any of your questions. Not without the presence of my lawyer.”
I sat forward in my chair, resting my hands on the table. “A young girl is dead. Dead. I need you to help me on this.”
“Okay, that’s enough, detective. We’ll be on our way. Thank you, Mrs. Richardson.” Nancy stood up, nudging my arm, and as I lifted my phone from my pocket, she gave me a hard yank.
I set the phone on the table and shoved it toward her. “You know who he is. Don’t tell me you don’t.”
Without so much as a glimpse at the screen, Dawn kept her eyes on mine. “Please leave this building.”
“Let’s go!” Nancy tugged hard, knocking my arm into the phone, nearly sending it crashing to the floor. “Now!”
In the scuffle, I hit ‘Play’, and at the sounds of the girl screaming over the laughter of the men in the video, Dawn’s eyes widened with panic.
“Turn that off!” she screamed, scrambling for my phone.
“Officer! Enough!” Nancy gave another hard tug, and I turned it off, holding both hands in the air in surrender. “Alright! I’m done. I’m sorry. We’ll go. I’m sorry for disturbing you.” I swiped up the pen and notepad lying on the table and jotted down my phone number. “If you change your mind, or need to contact me—”
“Enough! Let’s go. Now!” Huffing with irritation, Nancy thumped me in the arm and exited the room first. The moment she was out the door, I lunged forward and locked it behind her.
I spun back toward Mrs. Richardson, who took a step back, grabbing hold of the chair behind her.
“I’m calling security. If you lay one hand on me—”
“Please. I’m begging you. Just tell me if this is you.” I fast-forwarded the video to the end, keeping all the screams and laughter muted, and held it out to her once more.
“Dax! Open this door!” Nancy’s voice and the accompanying knocks on the door carried the kind of fury I suspected would have me dodging punches later.
“I’ve already spoken to the legitimate police and a psychiatrist who inquired about it. I have nothing more to say.” Her eyes dipped to my phone, where the part of the video with Nicoleta standing on the dock was paused. With a frown, her gaze dipped a second time. And a third, until she tipped her head, studying the image on my phone. “What is this? I don’t recognize this part of it.”
“The first scenes were you, though?”
“Yes. And they cut to an interview afterward. Of me talking to the camera. It was to ensure that no charges were pressed. That it was completely voluntary on my part.”
I played the final scene of Nicoleta being pushed into the water and left to drown.
The woman slapped a hand over her mouth, and tears filled her eyes. “Dear God. She was murdered?”
The knocks at the door turned to pounding and the rattling of the doorknob.
“She’s alive. But they meant to kill her.”
She shook her head, her brows furrowed and troubled. “That wasn’t on the original video. It’s been doctored.”
Suddenly, everything clicked. Made sense why they’d tacked it on to the end, because anyone who’d have done some snooping around might’ve stumbled upon Dawn Richardson, well-adjusted and living the good life. No one would’ve known it was Nicoleta who’d been tossed into that river and left to die.
“Who commissioned it?”
The pounding at the door increased with intensity, telling me Nancy was about to lose her shit.
Still locked on the video, Dawn’s eyes filled with tears. “I don’t know.”
“Are you certain?”
Indignant eyes met mine, brimming with the kind of scorn that made me back off. “Absolutely certain.”
As fucked up as it sounded, part of me was relieved. Just to know that Nicoleta had been telling the truth. She wasn’t crazy. Not about that, at least. “Thank you. I’m sorry for all of this, but you’ve been a big help.”
Swiping at the tears in her eyes, she pointed at me in warning. “You’re to destroy that video. I want no trace of it.”
“On the condition that you don’t say a word about today. To anyone. And that Officer Daniels, in particular, was never even here.”
“You have my word.”
With a nod, I turned back toward the door, setting my hand on the knob. Through the obscured glass, I could see Nancy pacing in the hallway. “Can I just ask you … why? Why did you do it?”
She rolled her shoulders back and kept her chin high. “Sometimes, you have to sink to the very depths of humanity in order to find your own. People deserve second chances. Detective.”
Nodding a second time, I swung the door open to Nancy, who stood red-faced and fuming, her eyes razor cut to tear into me. We left the facility without a word spoken, until we arrived at the cruiser and climbed inside.
“I’ll tell him … I’ll tell him you put a gun to my head. You forced me to do it.” She bent forward, gripping her temples, and rested her head against the steering wheel. “I should just shoot you now. Better yet, I should shoot myself.”
“It’s okay, Nancy.”
“It’s not okay! Do you have any idea how much shit we’re in? No, fuck that
. How much shit you’re in. I’m not associating myself with you.”
“She’s not going to go to your superiors. Relax. What’s she going to say? My name is Dawn Richardson, and I’d like to report Officer Daniels for inquiring about a snuff film I starred in back in college?”
“Fuck, Dax! Is that what this was about? You said it was about a missing girl!”
“It is. She’s not going to say anything. Trust me, she gave me her word.”
Throwing her hands up in the air, Nancy shook her head. “Oh, well, she gave you her word. Forget that she happened to be locked in a room with a fucking lunatic at the time.”
“It’s her reputation. She’s not going to fuck with that.”
“Why? Why was this so important to you?” Face in her palms, her voice arrived muffled, but nowhere near as furious as before.
“They tried to murder an innocent girl, Nancy.”
“And so … what is she to you?”
It’d been almost a week since I last saw Nicoleta, and yet, the question weighed as heavy as that first night she’d walked out on me. “Everything. She’s everything to me.”
36
Dax
If I didn’t think about her, it was only for fleeting second, or two. Perhaps a distraction that gave me some reprieve from those amber eyes seared into my brain. Artists had their muses, stalkers had their obsessions, and I had Nicoleta. From the moment I’d laid eyes on her, tied and bound in the back of Tesarik’s SUV, I knew she’d be the elusive butterfly, impossible to net.
Even if she was bat-shit crazy, and had made up a rival crime lord to give her enough brass balls to go after someone like Tesarik, it didn’t change the fact that my body had begun to mourn her touch. Needed her like blood to a cold, dead heart. Every day without her, I could feel myself slipping deeper into the darkness.
I closed the medicine cabinet, leaving the bottle of fentanyl on the shelf, just like the day before, and the day before that.