Who We Are (FireNine #2)

by Williams, S. Q.

  I stumbled downstairs, feeling much better going down than I did going up. The lobby was clear of people, so I pulled my phone out of my bra to give Kelsey a call. Around the third ring, I was stepping outside and I saw her… and I literally burst out laughing.

  Roy was sitting on the bench in the shadows and Kelsey was on his lap. Their lips were locked, tongues colliding. I guess I was right about his hots for Kelsey.

  Apparently, my laugh didn’t get through to them because they were still sticking their tongues down one another’s throats, so I cleared mine, tucking my phone into my bra again. Roy was about to grip Kelsey’s ass and pull her closer, but when he heard me, he pushed her back a little, his lips red and swollen.

  “Gage is taken care of,” I said to break the ice. He wiped his mouth with the back of his hand and nodded.

  “Oh… shit.” Kelsey hopped off Roy’s lap, wiping her bottom lip with the top of her arm. “Um… whoa. Okay. Those tequila shots were obviously a no-go.”

  “Were they?” Roy asked, tilting his head at Kelsey and smirking. “I was kind of having… fun.”

  “With me?” Kelsey burst into a laugh, stumbling on her heels. Roy stood up and caught her by the waist before she could move anymore and possibly bust her ass.

  “Yes, with you,” he said. He looked at me. “What did Gage say?”

  “He said he was going to try and compromise with Penelope, but I know it won’t be soon so I’m still paying Kristina a visit.”

  Roy raised an eyebrow, looking me over suspiciously. “Is that it? Your hair seems kinda frizzy. It wasn’t like that before you went in.” He laughed.

  I bit on a smile. I knew what he was really getting at, but I wasn’t about to go there with him. “He also wanted to meet up for lunch tomorrow. I told him no.”

  Roy sneered. “Sure you did.” He looked at Kelsey, who was swaying and aiming to keep her balance.

  “Is she drunk?” I asked with stitched eyebrows.

  Roy sighed as he helped Kelsey back to the bench and sat her down. He pulled her feet up on his lap to take off her heels, and I smiled in awe. Wow, he was much sweeter than I thought. “Yeah. I took her to the bar next door. She wanted to go. I’ll call Stan and have him take you two home so you won’t have to catch a cab.”

  Kelsey swayed a little more and mumbled something under her breath.

  Roy laughed and placed her heels down on the concrete, obviously catching what she said. “She kept ordering shots. I thought it was best to take her out and get some air to get her away from the drinks, but then it lead to… this.” He shrugged, tossing his shaggy hair out of his face and pulling out his phone.

  I laughed a little. Yeah, this guy definitely couldn’t rip off a kitten’s head. He was too nice and I was glad I actually got to know him a little. I was glad his standoffish behavior was gone because just like Montana and Deed, Roy could be like a brother to me as well.

  After Roy gave Stan a call and we waited while discussing the events for the next day, a drunk Kelsey and I were on our way to her apartment. During the whole ride, I couldn’t stop smiling and I was glad for the time being that Kelsey was nearly passed out on the seat beside me. Even though we weren’t where I wanted to be yet, being reunited with Gage made me feel sort of… complete. I couldn’t wait to finally get everything over with and be happy again. We deserved one another. He just had to do some fighting, too.

  I got to the apartment and helped Kelsey change clothes before tucking her in bed. Before I could step out and turn off the light, Kelsey called my name and I turned around.

  “Yeah?” I called.

  “I had fun with Roy tonight. I never thought in a million years this would happen, but he asked me to go on a date with him this weekend.” I laughed as I strolled to the empty side of her bed. Her eyes were still closed and her hands were tucked beneath her cheek.

  “Well, are you gonna go on the date with him?”

  “I don’t know,” she murmured. “I thought about it while he had his tongue in my mouth, and I told you before I don’t like to be publicized. I like my privacy. We won’t have that if we’re together… but I do like him...”

  “I think he likes you, too.”

  “Think so?”

  “Yeah. I didn’t think he could like anyone outside his band, to be honest. But the way he stares at you… watches you. It’s cute.” I smiled as she grinned, her eyes still closed. Her breathing evened out moments later and that was my cue that she was falling asleep.

  I shut her bedroom door behind me, went to the guest bedroom to shower up, toss on some PJs, brush my teeth, and then snuggle beneath the blankets, all that done with Gage on my mind.

  As I got situated, my phone buzzed on the nightstand and I lit up, knowing exactly who it was.

  “Hello?” I answered.

  “Ellie,” Gage said into the phone. “How you feeling?”

  I frowned and sat up against the headboard. “Good… I guess. What about you?” Three light knocks came from the front door, interrupting my call, and I climbed out of bed quickly, confused on who could be at Kelsey’s apartment door this late. I knew Kelsey had some spontaneous friends from AG a few floors down, but I doubt they’d be over this late. “Hold on. Someone’s at the door.”

  “Okay.”

  I hurried down the hall, flipped on a light switch, and looked through the peephole. And when I saw him standing there with his phone against his ear, I sparked and lit up like a star. I tossed my phone on the sofa, unlocked the door, and swung it open.

  “You asked how I’m feeling? Much better now,” Gage rumbled out, smiling charismatically and pulling his phone from his ear. I left no time for him to speak again. Instead, I threw my arms around his neck and glued my mouth to his. His lips spread to smile behind the kiss and he stumbled his way in, shutting the door behind him. We kissed the whole way to the guest bedroom, and as soon as we were in the room, I released him and shut the door.

  “How did you know where I was?” I asked, not that I really cared. I was just glad he was with me. I couldn’t fight my glee.

  “I caught Roy outside and he got the address from Stan for me. I caught a ride as soon as I could.” His lips stretched as he tilted his head. “I can’t stay away from you. Seeing you tonight made me realize how many nights I’ve missed out on sharing with you. I know I fucked up. Bad. I’m a fuck-up and I’m—I’m sorry, Ellie. I’m really sorry.” He grabbed my hands, kissed my knuckles, but I shook my head.

  “No. It’s okay.” I released my hands from his to cup his face. I gave him a hard kiss on the lips and smiled. “Gage, it’s okay. We live and we learn, right? You’re not a fuck-up, so quit saying that. Just promise me you’ll actually let her go this time, no matter what happens. You know there are people who will support you. You can’t let this go on with her any longer. It’s destroying you and sooner or later it’ll destroy the band. You’re stronger than this and you know it, so fight it.”

  He swallowed and debated on whether it was a good thing to do. I started worrying after his silence cascaded through the room, but as a smile spread across his beautiful lips, I smiled with him. “I promise, Sweet Ellie. I love you.”

  I grinned. “I love you, too.”

  After a few more minutes of making out, we stripped one another, landed on top of the bed, and made incredible, passionate love. And for some reason—even though we both knew there was going to be trouble ahead—it was the best love we’d ever made. The future didn’t matter. The past didn’t matter. Penelope didn’t matter. Life didn’t matter. It was just us, in our own universe, never wanting to let one another go. We were happy, returning all the love we took away from each other. It was good. We were good.

  We were going to make this work.

  I had no doubt about it. I could see in his eyes as he stroked my chin and we breathed through the moment without saying one word that he wanted me back more than anything, but there was a minor roadblock—Penelope. In order to keep me, he had to go
through her. I just hoped he actually went through with his word and didn’t back out like he did two years ago. I wanted him to be stronger.

  I let him right back in and it wasn’t very smart of me, but how could I not? I loved him—hell, I was in love with him—and anger could never conquer what my heart truly felt. After a while, I was no longer pissed at him when I found out why he left me without saying good-bye. I was missing him because he was good to me in New York but made a dumb decision, and sadly, I wasn’t a part of the outcome. But family comes first. Family always comes first. And I understood why he was so worried.

  I couldn’t afford any more damage to my heart, so I shut my eyes and prayed for the best before cuddling against him for the rest of the night. I prayed that tomorrow would go better than expected and that peace would finally make it’s way back to us. We were way more than either of us could see. He’d placed a stake in my heart the first time he told me loved me, and since then I’ve been his. I don’t think I could’ve been anyone else’s, no matter how much time we spent apart or how much time I spent with the other. Where there was darkness, he filled me up and I spilled over with light. He was my light. My sanity. My world.

  The sun spilled in and I shifted, groaning as I pulled the blankets off my face. My hand landed on warm, bare skin, and I smiled, remembering the previous night. It amazed me that one person could make me so giddy and boiled over with excitement. I could smell him and I breathed in his spicy scent before sitting up. I was glad he hadn’t run off again. I never wanted to relive that fear in my heart.

  Gage was still sleeping, his lips parted, forearm on his forehead, and his inked elbow pointing toward the ceiling. He was snoring so I decided to let him keep resting. Pushing out of bed, I slipped into a pair of shorts, a tank, and then stepped out of the bedroom. Coffee lingered in the air and I frowned. I was sure Kelsey would’ve slept in after getting drunk last night.

  As I rounded the corner, there she was, bending over the island counter with a mug of coffee in one hand and her forehead in the other. Her dark hair was matted (but I could tell she played with it) and her makeup was smeared, proving she had a restless night.

  “Morning, lady.” I smiled as I met by her side and bent my elbows on the counter with her.

  “Morning,” she sighed.

  “Sleep good?”

  “It was decent. My head is killing me… but at least I got to make out with Roy last night.” She grinned as she met my eyes, taking a sip of her coffee. “Still can’t believe that happened. Like, seriously. He’s, hands down, the best kisser ever.”

  I laughed, turning for the coffee maker. I grabbed a mug from the cabinet above and poured myself some before adding crème and sugar.

  “So what’s Grendel doing here?”

  I snapped my eyes on hers. “You know he’s here?”

  “Well, yeah. I went to the bedroom to check on you but saw him all cuddled on your ass.”

  I laughed, sipping my coffee and entering the dining area. I sat on one of the chairs and Kelsey sat beside me. “I’m going to see his sister today,” I whispered.

  “Oh?” Kelsey’s eyebrows arched.

  “Yeah. I’m just waiting on him to leave. I wanna do it early and get it out of the way. The sooner the better, you know?”

  “Get what out of the way?” Gage’s deep voice filled the room and Kelsey and I both whipped our heads to look at him. He had sexy bedhead for sure. No shirt. Slender, deliciously inked body. Jeans that hung right below the waist, revealing the hot, deep V along his pelvis. Damn, was there ever a time he wasn’t so appealing?

  “Uh, nothing.” I stood from the table as he pulled his shirt over his head and tugged the hem down.

  “Mind if I grab some coffee before I go?” he asked, looking at Kelsey.

  “Yeah, sure. Feel free, but don’t wash the mug. I can sell it on eBay. The girls will love that.”

  I bit on a laugh as Gage’s chuckle rumbled from the heart of his throat. “Will do.”

  “Where are you going?” I asked, following him into the kitchen. I watched as he grabbed the coffee pot and filled his mug to the rim.

  “Roy just called and wants to meet up at the studio. Thought I’d take him up on it since I had tons of inspiration last night.” He winked over his shoulder and a blush crept upon me. I could feel the heat boiling in my cheeks, but I brushed it off and bit on another smile.

  “Well, I can’t wait to hear the fruit of this inspiration.” I stood on my toes and kissed his cheek, running my palm down his chest. He smiled, sipping on his coffee. I knew this was Roy’s plan of getting Gage out the way for a few hours so I could pay my visit, so after he drank his coffee and ate a donut, I let him go without hesitation. I didn’t want to, but I had more important things to do—not only for me, but for him as well.

  After kissing him good-bye, I dashed to my room and tossed on a cotton T-shirt and jean shorts. It was a pretty warm day in New York, but instead of sandals, I went with the Chuck Taylors Gage bought me a few summers ago while we were on tour together. I admit I stuffed them in the back of my closet and swore never to wear them again, along with the dress he bought me, but as time passed, I started wearing them again to prove I could be strong without him. Now I was happier than a pig in shit because the shoes I wore were a gift from him, so we could match. I knew how much he loved his Chucks.

  “You want me to come with you?” Kelsey asked, still clinging to her forehead as I passed her to get to the door.

  “No. It shouldn’t take long. Plus, you don’t feel well. Go lay back down.” I grabbed my satchel off the coatrack and tossed it across my shoulders.

  “Okay, but if shit gets ugly, call me… but if I don’t answer, run like hell. I may not make it in time. I’m gonna go lie down with some Advil now.”

  I nodded as she passed by me and then I stepped out of the apartment. I dug around my satchel for the paper with the address Roy gave me as I stumbled downstairs to get to the main street and then took a deep breath before flagging down a cab.

  I can do this. I can do this, I told myself, but I was nervous as hell and I wasn’t sure why. I had to be confident. I had to prove my love for Gage was real and I had to do it correctly. Any screw-ups could fuck everything up… and that made it much worse to think about. I was never good at talking with people about how I felt. I never had the opportunity to tell anyone anything about me until Ben, Gage, and the band came along.

  I gave the driver the address and he told me it was going to be a twenty-minute drive, thirty if I included traffic, so I sat back and thought of every possible way to bring it up. But of course every possible way seemed like it was going to be a complete fail.

  I was so caught up with thinking about how I was going to approach Kristina that I didn’t even realize we were nearing a complex of condos moments later. I got nervous as he pulled into a parking lot and said, “We’re here.”

  “Thanks.” I gave him his money along with a decent tip and then hopped out. The taxi driver pulled off almost immediately, and I sighed, staring ahead. I took a glance at the paper for the condo number—104G.

  I tucked the paper into my back pocket and found the boldness to pick up my feet and get to the lobby. As I ascended in the elevator, my heart pounded more and more. My palms became sticky, sweaty. My mind was all over place. I couldn’t think straight for the life of me. I just hoped this wasn’t a bad idea.

  I stood in front of 104G and took a huge breath. “Okay, Eliza. You can do this.” I inhaled, filling my lungs with much needed oxygen and then released it through parted lips. I lifted my hand to knock and for some reason, the knocks sounded loud as hell… or maybe I confused it with my pounding heart.

  “Coming!”

  “Who the hell is that?”

  I frowned because there were two voices. Both female. And the first one sounded too damn familiar.

  Before I could process whose voice it was, locks clinked, chains rattled, and the door swung open. And as I saw her
standing before me, I instantly hated this whole plan. I knew it was going to be fucked up. I just knew it. Nothing I did ever went according to plan.

  She was standing in a pair of grey yoga pants and a yellow sports bra. She’d obviously been working out because sweat dampened her skin and her chest was sinking and rising. As she saw me standing before her, she grimaced and tucked her dark hair behind her ear.

  “May I ask why you’re here?” Penelope asked. There was no fluff in her voice. No harmonious bells. Nothing. Just cold, pure hatred.

  “I’m not here for you.” I took a glance over her shoulder and saw someone pale pass by. “I’m looking for Kristina.”

  “Hmm… too bad. Kristina’s getting ready to go to her morning rehab.” Penelope folded her arms and spread her legs. Okay. She wasn’t going to let me in… and I was tired of playing nice. This wasn’t going to end well.

  “Look, just let me in. It’s important. I’m not here to argue with you or—”

  “Bitch,” Penelope hissed.

  I narrowed my eyes. “Excuse me?”

  “You heard me. You’re a bitch. A home-wrecking, crazy, desperate bitch. You’re here for Gage, not his sister—how the hell do you know about her anyway?”

  “He told me. Unlike you, there was no need to eavesdrop. And call me a bitch again and all your blood will be pooling on the floor.”

  Penelope tossed her head back and laughed. “That so? Am I supposed to be afraid of wittle ol’ Ewiza?” She stabbed a finger at my chest so hard it made me wince and take a step back. “I’m going to tell you this once and one time only. Stay. The. Fuck. Away. From. My. Fiancé. He doesn’t want you. He doesn’t love you. He loves me. He says it every time we’re together. He says it every time he’s buried deep inside me. He wants me. Get that through your thick fucking skull. You were just a temporary piece of ass. He knows what he really wants so take your trashy ass back where you belong and stop trying to ruin our marriage! It’s going to happen between us, whether you like it or not, and there’s nothing you’ll be able to do about it.”