“SHUT THE FUCK UP, WHORE!” he screamed at me, pulling back a clenched fist.
“Oh yeah, Mack! Do it! DO IT! Damage Carrion property right before an auction! I’d pay to see what happens to you then!”
He fell back, running his once raised hand through his hair as if it was all he’d ever meant to do.
Good.
I was glad that I was getting to him. It was what he deserved and more. My body shook with its own rage and I worked to relax as well. It wouldn’t do me any good to get worked up. I had to find a way to get out of here. I was sure that Jace would be looking for me by now, but I needed to have a back-up plan and so far, I had jack and shit.
“Consider yourself lucky,” Mack finally said, turning away.
“Luckier than you still,” I called after him.
“Fuck you, Mia,” he said, not bothering to look back.
“Only in your dreams, I’m sure,” I shot back.
He flinched noticeably at that.
And then he was gone, the door slamming shut and the basement I was chained-up in returning to near-total darkness. I clenched my eyes shut, trying desperately to calm myself against the raging sea of anger and hate and strangely empowering—yet insanely self-risking—sense of empowerment I’d awoken into.
Madness, I mused to myself. This must be the sort of madness Jace was telling me about.
Then, left alone in this foreign-yet-strangely-familiar place, I continued my pursuit for a way to free myself…
All while reminding myself that I was alone; that I wouldn’t turn around and see the rotting body of Missus Creely, or, worse yet, my own waiting, rotting form.
****
I wasn’t sure how much time had passed, but I was sure that the chains weren’t going anywhere. And, while that was the case, neither was I. I closed my eyes, trying to remain calm when every part of me wanted to scream. I couldn’t think of anything to help. I glanced around the room, looking for anything that could of any use and saw that the basement might as well have been abandoned. Aside from me and these chains, it was empty. I wondered again exactly where I was. The basement didn’t look much different from the kind you’d see in a residential home and I wondered if the Carrions decided to move here after Jace and them had blown up their old base.
I frowned, hating that I had been so close to something so volatile. I had had no idea. I felt stupid that I hadn’t thought to question the smell, but then again, that wasn’t our job. If I had begun to ask questions, I’d most likely have been dealt with. I knew from experience that saying anything but “yes sir” to them was asking for a beating, or even worse. I shivered, hating that I was back in this place. I thought I had escaped them for good.
No.
I couldn’t think like that. Couldn’t let myself think this would be the end. No matter what Malcolm said, I couldn’t let this be it. Jace would come for me and he wouldn’t come along. I just had to hold out, had to stay safe until he found his way to me. I frowned, trying to ignore the part of me that asked just how he was supposed to do that. Even as I fought it though, I realized that it wasn’t wrong. Just how would Jace find me? If the Carrion crew had setup base at some random residential house, I had to assume it wasn’t going to be easy to find. It’s not like they placed a big neon sign on their bases. Even the apartment Candy and I had lived in hadn’t seemed that out of the ordinary for the area it was in.
I bit my lip, wrapping my chained arms around my knees as I hugged them to my chest. Suddenly, I felt extremely exhausted. Between the stress and still wearing off the side effects of whatever drug Mack has stuck me with, I was finding it extremely difficult to focus. My eyes began to drift and as bad as I wanted to stay awake, stay alert, I couldn’t fight it any longer. Falling to my side, I drifted off to (thankfully) a dreamless sleep.
****
I woke up to what sounded like fingernails tapping on glass.
For a moment, lingering between sleep and not, I found myself thinking of a crow pecking at a window.
A window?
My eyes shot open and I was pulling myself to my feet, looking around for a source of the sound. Sure enough, there was a short, wide window—filthy with grime—about six-feet from the floor.
Six-feet from this floor, I thought, but level with the ground outside.
I shivered as I thought about how the Creely house had had a similar window in their own cellar.
I squinted to see out the window and saw that there was a blurred face in the glass. I could hear a voice muffled through the glass and bit my lip. I wanted to see who was trying to talk to me, but another part of me worried that it was just a member of the Carrions playing a trick on me. I watched as the person on the other side carefully pushed the glass window open. Suddenly I was staring at the face of…
“Candy?” I said, not able to hide the shock in my voice. “What are you doing here?”
“Shush!” she said, placing her finger to her lips. “Look, I don’t got much time. I’m lucky to be here at all.”
“How did you get here in the first place?” I asked, making sure to keep my voice down this time.
“You suck the right dick, you get the right information,” Candy shrugged.
“What? Really?” I said, shaking my head.
“Well, that and I knew someone who still works with these losers,” Candy said, frowning down at me. “How you doing, Mia?”
“I could be better,” I said, glancing down at my hands.
“They chained you up?” she more stated than asked as she glared down at my hands. “Fucking savages.”
“Nancy, this is really dangerous,” I said, biting my lip. “You could get killed.”
“Yeah, and just like I said to your boyfriend: you aren’t the boss of me,” she said, shaking her head. “Can you tell me what they’ve got planned for you?”
“Mack says they plan to auction me off,” I said, glancing back up at her and shook my head. “And while he’s usually a grade-A lying asshole, I think I can trust that he’s telling the truth this time around.”
Candy nodded. “Don’t suppose you know when that’s happening, do you?” she asked.
I shook my head. “No, but I’m pretty sure they’ll kill Mack long before it happens.”
“Don’t tell me you pity the son-of-a-bitch,” Candy sneered.
“Not one bit,” I said, not feeling at all sorry for the harshness in my voice. “I’m just pissed that I won’t have a chance to do it myself. But you I do care about. You are risking a lot right now just being here.”
“I know, which is why I gotta make this quick,” she agreed and sighed. “I don’t like it, but I gotta go. I’ve got to call Jace—tell him… well, everything—and it’ll be better if I don’t get stupid and try to make the call anywhere near here.”
“Tell him to be careful,” I warned, biting my lip.
Candy rolled her eyes and said, “Much good that’ll do. Last time I talked to him I got the impression he was aching to get some killing done.”
“Damn…” I muttered, shaking my head. “Look, I don’t know what the scene’s like up there,” I nodded towards my ceiling, “but Mack was talking about how the Crew was keeping him here. Fair to assume they’re still here. Can’t say how many, but with me here and Jace… well, with Jace being Jace, it’s fair to assume there’s a lot of them and they’re prepared for trouble.”
“Alright, I’ll warn him,” she sighed. “Guess it’d be worth it to warn you to keep your head low when the shit hits the fan.”
SIXTEEN
~JACE~
I knew I should’ve waited.
I knew that Candy was our best bet, and I knew she was doing her thing.
But—god-fucking-damn!—I also knew that she was taking her sweet-ass time!
And, in the meantime, I was just sitting around, twiddling my thumbs, and putting all my faith in a single person’s plan to manipulate scared whores out of information regarding a target of interest for a violent mo
torcycle gang. The more I thought about it, the crazier it sounded.
And that was coming from me!
It was a long shot and, honestly, a part of me already had known I wasn’t going to be finding anything out in the city.
But still…
If nothing else, I needed to get out of the shop, get away from Danny and the others. They’d already begun to orchestrate a formal plan, and while I should’ve been there—should’ve been thankful for that much—it felt too much like we were talking about what we should be doing while, instead, we did nothing. And so, though I knew I should’ve been more a part of the plans, I couldn’t focus.
Nobody had seemed to be blaming me, though.
And when I got to my feet, declaring that I could sit around no longer—that I had to at least be out there—nobody seemed eager to try to stop me.
Danny, being Danny, had pulled me aside to say all he’d be expected to say:
“Ya gonna be okay?”
“Yes.”
“Ya gonna do anything stupid?”
“Not excessively.”
“Ya gonna wait on us if and when a call comes in?”
“Long as I can, at least.”
“Anything I can do for ya?”
“Nothing you’re not already doing.”
“Ya know we want this all to work out just as much as you, right?”
“I’d certainly hope so.”
“Promise ye’ll be careful?”
“No.”
Then, based on all that, he’d let me go.
Because, as his boss, there wasn’t much else he could do.
Hours later, I came to the aggravating conclusion that I couldn’t do much more than ride around in big, boxy circles.
I took a deep breath, pushing the accelerator harder than I had in sometime. It felt good just to let loose, to be able to let out all the chaotic feelings that toiled in my mind. I needed to be strong for Mia, needed to help her out anyway I could. As I made it off the freeway, I stopped out front of the Denny’s that Mia and I had gone to. A part of me considered this the location to our first date, even though that wasn’t entirely accurate. I closed my eyes, remembering our time together.
It had been the first time I had ever felt so comfortable in god knew how long. I sat across this bombshell dressed in a far too expensive dress to ever be seen at a Denny’s restaurant. Yet it felt so right. While she had tried so hard to look strong, I could tell she was close to breaking point. It was what called to me, I supposed. I knew where she was, was still there at that moment. We were both broken and that night, everything had changed. We had been able to laugh and joke and even though we’d been completely opposite in what our favorite things were, I’d already felt a strong connection.
I supposed opposites did attract.
I ran my hand over my head, hating how lonely I suddenly felt. How terrified I truly was Mia’s safety. All I wanted was her back in my arms. I would trade the world to get her back. I’d even trade being the leader of The Crows. Let the Carrion Crew have the city, say fuck it, and drive off wherever we could.
Don’t be a dumbass, Jace.
I thought it was the voice of Logic that taunted, letting me know that there was no escaping this that easily, but I was surprised to hear it in my mind in both my father’s and brother’s voices simultaneously. It didn’t matter if the Crows were disbanded or not, the Carrion crew would take their due. And that due involved Mia, involved doing whatever it was they had planned for her. I shivered, closing my eyes shut, telling myself not to go there. I couldn’t risk losing it any more than I already was.
I was too close to breaking again.
It felt so crazy to realize that I’d only been at this point a few weeks ago. That meeting Mia had changed so much so quickly. I’d never imagined I could fall in love so quickly. Even with Anne it had taken time. Hell, one could say it had taken a lifetime! We had been childhood friends; we hadn’t even known for most of our time together that we felt what we’d come to feel for one another. We were well into our late teens before we’d even worked up the guts to express those feelings aloud.
“Made the sex for those first few years really awkward!” I used to say when this subject came up with Anne.
“Oh my… perv!” she’d wail at that, usually landing a playful slap on my arm.
That was the way it almost always played out, at least.
It all seemed so cozy and perfect then.
And yet…
And yet there was always some great divide between us. As kids, we’d always just been kids; it was all we were ever expected to be. But as we grew, expectations changed—Anne was expected to study and learn and explore all that life had to offer. She came from a small, secure place; a box called “normal” that was limiting and boring, sure, but it was also safe. In this box, one was educated, one took jobs, and then one got married and made more ones. And while Anne explored her options in that box, I was shown a world that was almost beyond limits. I was counting more money before I was thirteen than most people saw in their entire lifetime. I was learning how to handle myself in “parties” where more than half the attendees were carrying instruments of death. I shared a dinner table with hookers and hitmen alike. While Anne was raised in a world of limits and expectations, I was shaped into a gang leader.
Then, even knowing the sort of difference lingering between us like a great chasm, Anne had pursued that final stretch of a normal life with me…
And she’d died for it.
How quick had I been to say “fuck normal” after that?
Had I ever not said “fuck normal”?
I lingered on that. I’d always thought that I’d been angry that the box that Anne grew up in had been what I’d resented most—that I hated that I’d never get to know what normal was—but, more and more, I was beginning to realize that what I’d resented was that Anne could never step out of that box; that, no matter what, there’d be that chasm between us. I loved Anne, yes—with all my heart—but what might that chasm have represented for us down the line if T-Built and his vendetta hadn’t intervened?
And what did that mean for me and Mia?
I stared at the Denny’s for a minute longer, letting everything that had happened over the past week roll through me. I had to get in control and that meant I needed to go back. As much as I wanted just to drive across the city, to just let my feelings out with every mile I crossed, it wasn’t what Mia needed. It wasn’t what anybody needed, including myself. I had left the shop thinking that I was doing this for Mia. I chastised myself, knowing full well that this had been a selfish act made out of fear.
I needed to be back.
I needed to help plan.
I needed to save my girl.
My chopper roared back to life, rumbling like a second lover—one that Mia and I both adored—between my thighs.
I ran my palm over the flames painted across the gas tank, petting it like a wild animal—respecting it like one—and said, “Good girl.”
Then I tore out of the parking lot, a rejuvenated feeling pouring through me. I suddenly felt like I could succeed. I wasn’t afraid anymore and damn it felt good. I almost felt like my old self again. The old Jace who’d been strong, confident, not afraid of anything and willing to take whatever happened head-on.
It felt good to be back.
I was ready to show everyone just what kind of leader I could be. I sped across the freeway, seeing that the sun was beginning to set. It had nearly been a full day since Candy had left and we still hadn’t heard back. I planned to give her another few hours, but if things didn’t work out, it would be up to us. Somehow we’d have to figure out where the Carrion crew was setup on our own. I smirked, somehow knowing that it would work out. We’d find them and we’d take those fuckers down.
“Good to be back,” I whispered, not sure who I was whispering to as I shot off towards the shop.
All the same, I felt Logic and Defense and Neutral nodding their non-e
xistent heads in approval. Somewhere in the deeper recesses of my insanity, where nobody ever truly died and everybody was just there, watching me through my eyes, I felt my father and my brother do the same.
“Good,” I said with a smile. “Then we’re all in agreement.”
Then, like the Ghost of Christmas Past, she was standing at the end of the street.
Anne.
Just like she always had before…
Before Mia.
She stood, smiling a faint smile and holding her big, round, pregnant belly with one hand, the other outstretched in my direction.
Just like she always had before…
“But…” I muttered, slamming on the brakes—lingering there, idling, in the middle of the vacant street—and staring at what I knew to be nothing.
Nothing… but everything.
“But,” I said again, “what about Mia.”
And then the ghost—Anne—did something she’d never done before.
Her outstretched and waiting hand closed into a fist, and, as I watched, awestruck, she extended a thumb upwards towards the heavens.
“Go get her,” I heard a long-lost voice chime in my ears.
And that, as they say, was that.
****
As good as I had felt riding back, I somehow felt three times better as I made it to the shop. It was time for action and I could feel that the others would be in agreement as I stepped inside. Danny glanced over at me, looking up from a few pages he had on the desk in the office. On the lower level, I noticed that several of our men were going over our weapons and beginning to suit up. I raised an eyebrow, wondering if we were already more ahead than I’d thought.
“What’s up, Merc?” I asked, raising an eyebrow and pointing my thumb in the direction of where the men were working. “We going somewhere?”
CROWS MC SET-TO LOAD Page 59