Dedication
To David, for being the man I dreamt of finding my entire life. And for watching all the movies and making this the first book you’ve read since college. I hope it’s at least half as interesting as whatever you read on ESPN. xoxo
Contents
Cover
Title Page
Dedication
One: Bars, Bikers, and Bad News
Two: Bad Things Happen to Good People
Three: Good Things Come in Small Packages
Four: Daddy Issues
Five: Bygones Never Gone
Six: The Kindness of Strangers
Seven: Chance Meetings and Married Men
Eight: Money Matters
Nine: Tit for Tat
Ten: Unexpected Encounters
Eleven: An Unnatural Ally
Twelve: Unjust Reprisals
Thirteen: Matters of Life and Death
Fourteen: The Birth
Fifteen: Love Conquers All
About the Author
Books by Christine Conradt
Back Ad
Copyright
About the Publisher
One
Bars, Bikers, and Bad News
“Can’t go back. Still got an outstanding warrant there.” Chelsea, trying not to eavesdrop, couldn’t help but glance over at the leather-clad hulk of a man sitting a few bar stools away. At least 6’3” and sporting a dirty Hells Angels T-shirt, he sucked back a shot, the rim of the glass getting lost in his greasy goatee. He tilted his head to a scantily clad bleached-blond woman sitting next to him, and without lifting his drunken gaze from the breasts that were spilling haphazardly out of her bra, said, “We should just stay here in Philly.”
Please don’t, Chelsea thought as she turned to scan the room, looking for anyone she knew. Chelsea Sheridans was slender and lanky with a creamy complexion—a wisp of a girl. Her long red hair was pulled back in a messy ponytail, and soft strands that had worked themselves loose framed her perfect face. At only seventeen years old, she knew she had no business sitting in a dive bar, but she’d been doing it since she was twelve, so it felt familiar. And because she could easily pass for twenty-one with her long legs and calm demeanor, no one ever questioned what she was doing there. Unfortunately, she didn’t see a single person she felt like talking to. A few of the regulars, including a lady she liked named Dahlia, whose husband died from cancer the year before, were tucked down at the end of the bar and deeply involved in a conversation Chelsea couldn’t hear. Dahlia was laughing and seemed happy, which was rare, so Chelsea decided not to interrupt.
Chelsea looked back at her phone. No new text messages, no calls. She looked at the background on her phone, a photo she’d taken of a single weed with a tiny white blossom that had grown up through a crack between the panels of cement in the sidewalk. She wasn’t sure why, but seeing it made her feel hopeful and so she’d snapped a quick pic. She didn’t feel quite so hopeful tonight, though. Seeing the same faces night after night made her feel stuck. With millions of places in the world, this is where these people chose to come. They didn’t evolve or grow. They just got older. Even the weed changed more than they did. Chelsea didn’t want to be like these people. She didn’t want to get stuck like they were, eventually convincing herself that this was the best she could do. Every minute she spent there brought her closer to doing exactly that. Oh god. Why am I even here?
“You filthy cheater!” A voice boomed from the back as Chelsea blew out a sigh and slipped her phone back into her purse.
Several patrons, including Chelsea, swiveled around to see where the accusation was coming from. A short bald guy was pointing a finger at an older man wearing a bandanna on his head. They both held pool cues. Another argument emanating from billiards. How unique, Chelsea thought as she sighed and swung herself back around, ignoring them. Where some girls would freak out at seeing bar fights that started with words exchanged over beer-stained pool tables and drunks who suddenly pass out and drop from their chairs onto the dirty floor, none of it bothered Chelsea. She’d seen much worse. And not always at the Lucky Lady.
Chelsea inhaled the smell of stale cigarette smoke and blew out a sigh as she picked at the fuzzy little nubs on her faded maxi skirt. Rascal, the bartender, had been pouring drinks nonstop for the past half hour and without him to chat with, she was bored. She finished her vodka-cranberry and slid the empty glass back and forth between her hands, spinning it before letting it tap against her black-painted fingernails and chunky silver rings, hoping it would get his attention. It did.
“Try this.” Rascal grinned as he set two shot glasses in front of her.
“What is it?” Chelsea asked, sniffing the booze. “Tequila? I hate tequila.”
“You’ll like it. It’s smooth,” he assured her with a wink.
Chelsea’s eyes narrowed as she looked into his weathered face. When Rascal told her something was “smooth,” it usually meant “overpoweringly strong.” Why not? she thought. Maybe after a shot or two she’d cheer up a little. Chelsea lifted her glass and clinked the rim against his before knocking back the shot that was not, as she had predicted, in any way smooth. Coughing, she wiped her full pink lips with the back of her hand. “Good god, that was horrible,” she choked. Rascal laughed.
As he picked up the glasses with hands covered in faded tattoos and moved down the bar to a waiting patron, Chelsea noticed a crusty, rough-looking man with wiry black hair slinking his way toward her. She immediately turned her head in the opposite direction, hoping he’d think she was busy doing something else and not try to talk to her. No such luck.
“Whatchya drinkin’, sweetheart?” the man said with a tinge of a southern accent. Chelsea turned to him and was hit by a wall of stank breath—cheap beer and what was it? Sour-cream-and-onion potato chips? Rotting teeth? Nauseating.
Before she could answer, Rascal was right there. “Not interested,” he said in a serious tone.
“Let her speak for herself. What? She don’t got no tongue?” The intoxicated man wobbled precariously and grabbed the bar to steady himself. His glassy eyes darted back and forth between Chelsea and Rascal. Rascal leaned closer to the man and gave him a threatening look. Taking the hint, the guy made a sloppy hand motion suggesting Chelsea wasn’t worth the hassle and then slid his way down the bar to chat up some less attractive, but more receptive, barflies.
“I can handle that stuff myself, y’know,” Chelsea said, matter-of-fact.
“You know your dad expects me to look out for you,” Rascal responded as he picked up her empty vodka glass and dropped it into a sink full of soapy water. The truth was, Chelsea appreciated that Rascal kept her safe like a big brother would, but she wasn’t a child anymore. She’d basically been taking care of herself and in some ways, her father, since her mother died ten years ago.
Chelsea twisted around to get a view of her father, who was at the far end of the bar flirting with a woman wearing too much makeup and too little clothing. She watched as he pressed his large frame against the woman’s back, leaning over her, helping her line up a shot on the pool table.
“I guess he’s pretty busy right now,” she spat, annoyed.
“He cares about you. Don’t ever doubt that,” Rascal stated with quiet confidence. Not in the mood to argue, Chelsea grabbed the patchwork purse off the back of her chair and made her way toward the pool table. She could feel the ogling eyes of several of the men bore into her as she walked past.
Stepping up to her father, Chelsea waited for him to acknowledge her.
“There you go. Just like that,” he said to the woman bent over the table as she clumsily lined up a shot. I’ve never seen anyone hold a pool cue like that, Chelsea thought as the woman tried to balance t
he stick between two fingers. Chelsea watched as the woman took the shot, missed horribly, and then made a dramatically sad face.
“Poo,” she said. “I’m terrible at this.”
Yes, you are, Chelsea thought to herself. You should pack it up right now and let me have a word with my dad.
“You’ll get better. Don’t worry. I’m gonna teach you,” her father assured the woman who, clearly not picking up on Chelsea’s telepathy, didn’t seem to be going anywhere.
“Dad,” Chelsea said, folding her arms across her chest.
“Yeah, honey, what is it?”
“I’m going home. Can I have money for a cab?” Chelsea asked in a tone that let her father know she’d had her fill of the Lucky Lady for one night.
“Dom, it’s your turn, man,” a Latino man with shoulder-length black hair said from across the billiards table, trying to hurry him up.
“The table’s not goin’ anywhere. I’m talking to my daughter,” he responded. The man put his hands up in mock surrender and went about refilling his glass of beer. Chelsea’s father turned back to her. “Is everything okay?”
“Yeah, I’m just . . . bored.” That wasn’t the entire truth. Yes, there was a certain ennui that came with sitting on a ratty bar stool night after night, but it was more than that. There was also the anxiety building in Chelsea because she hadn’t received a single message from her boyfriend, Jeff, the entire night. Chelsea had tried all evening to push that out of her mind, but now she just wanted some time alone.
“Sure, sweetie, sure,” her dad said as he extracted a crisp one-hundred-dollar bill from his wallet. “I’ll be home later. Can you stop over at Mikey’s and grab me a carton of cigarettes? I’m almost out.”
Chelsea managed to flag down a taxi immediately and directed it to Mikey’s, a run-down convenience store with a myriad of signs advertising specials on eggs, alcohol, and Pennsylvania lottery tickets. Chelsea handed the driver a twenty, accepted her change, and gave a two-dollar tip.
A tarnished bell above the door clanked unceremoniously, announcing her arrival. Mikey, who was sitting behind the counter, squinting over bifocals as he read a magazine, looked up and smiled as he saw Chelsea approach the counter. He grabbed his lacquered cane and with a shaky arm, slowly pulled himself up, and tugged his shirt down over his potbelly.
“Well, look at the beauty that just walked into my store. Lucky me!” Mikey said as a grandfatherly smile spread across his face.
“Hi, Mikey. How are you?”
“Any day that I’m here to see the sun go down is a good day,” he said with exuberance. Chelsea loved his positivity. No matter how bad things were, Mikey always had a way of seeing the brighter side.
“I couldn’t agree more,” she said.
“Your dad out of smokes?” he asked as he tidied the counter, lining up a display of little palm-tree-shaped car air fresheners that hang from the rearview mirror. Chelsea nodded. “Got a few unopened cases in the back.” Mikey started to hobble toward the back room with his cane when he suddenly stopped and swayed back to her, his bushy eyebrows turned down. “By the way, did you hear about Greg Foster?”
“No. What?” Chelsea could feel her heart rate pick up just at the mention of Greg’s name.
“He made parole,” Mikey said, his voice was laced with worry. “Gonna be out next week.”
“That’s three years early!” Chelsea spat, her mind clamoring to process the information. It couldn’t be possible; Mikey must have his facts screwed up.
“Prisons are so overcrowded. I guess two years is enough for armed robbery these days.” Mikey’s words hung in the air like a dense fog.
“That’s not right. Two years isn’t enough,” she murmured. She fought back a tear, feeling utterly helpless. Mikey smiled at her. It was the kind of smile that told Chelsea he was resigned, not happy.
“Well, he wouldn’t have been put away at all if it hadn’t been for you. I’m grateful to you. . . .”
“Hey, Chelsea.” Chelsea and Mikey turned to see Mikey’s grandson, Adam, step into the tungsten-lit room from the back hallway. The sparkle in Adam’s aqua-colored eyes suggested he was pleasantly surprised to see her.
“Adam . . .” Chelsea said, the heaviness she’d just felt suddenly lifting a little. She’d practically grown up with Adam. When her father would bring her to Mikey’s for a case of beer on sweltering Saturdays in the summer, she and Adam would chase each other around the storeroom until Mikey would coax them out with Popsicles. She’d always take the purple one and he’d take red, and they routinely pawned the orange ones off on her dad because he was the only person on the planet who liked orange-flavored Popsicles—at least that’s what they believed at the time. They’d sit on a crumbling cement platform that Mikey referred to as the “loading dock,” peel the sticky white wrappers from their Popsicles, and let their legs swing off the edge.
“I’ll go grab those cigarettes,” Mikey uttered with a grin.
“I can do it, Gramps,” Adam responded, taking charge of the situation.
“No, no. You keep this beautiful young lady company,” Mikey said, and shuffled away. Adam stepped a little closer to her.
“Long time, no see,” he said, shoving his hands into the pockets of his baggy jeans. His lips curled up into a grin, revealing his perfect white teeth.
“Whose fault is that?” she teased. “I come in here at least once a week.” He shrugged, letting her have that one. The smile never left his face.
“I’m taking the quarter off from school to do an internship. They’re redoing the plumbing in the building, so I have a little time off. Thought I’d come back, hang out with Gramps.” Had his voice become deeper since the last time she saw him? He seemed taller, or stronger, or just more mature. There was a confidence about Adam she hadn’t noticed before. “I can’t believe you’re even standing here.” As he said it, a lock of his thick black hair fell in front of his eye. He brushed it back and Chelsea noticed how the fabric of his shirt stretched across his biceps. Then he tucked his hand back into his pocket.
“Why’s that?” she asked. Where else would she be? It’s not like she ever went anywhere.
“Figured you’d be in Berlin by now. Isn’t that what you wanted to do? Go see where your mom was born and all that?” She nodded, surprised he remembered that the last time they’d seen each other, she’d announced her plans to go to Germany, but that was almost a year ago and she wasn’t any closer to saving for that trip today than she was back then.
“Düsseldorf,” she corrected. “I’m gonna go really soon. I have it all mapped out.” The “really soon” part was a lie, but the part about the map was true. Either way, Chelsea was embarrassed that she’d made no progress at all.
“Oh yeah? Well I have a trip planned for Europe next spring. Backpack through Austria and check out Amsterdam. You should think about coming along and we could maybe do a week in Germany afterward if—”
Before he could finish, Mikey emerged from the back with a carton of cigarettes. Adam abruptly stopped talking.
“Here you go, my dear,” Mikey said as he handed it over, his hands trembling a little. They’d started doing that only a couple of months ago. The first time she’d seen it happen, she’d asked her father about it.
“It’s not Parkinson’s or anything, right?” It was the first thing that came up when she googled it and she prayed that wasn’t the case.
“Might just be a side effect of medication or something. Don’t worry about it. Whatever it is, there’s nothing you can do to change it and if Mikey wants to explain it, he will.” So Chelsea hadn’t asked.
She fished the hundred her father gave her from her pocket and handed it to him. Mikey opened the register to get her change. “Tell your dad to stop in when he gets a chance.”
“I will. Thanks,” she said. And then to Adam, “See you later.” Adam surprised her by reaching out with a muscular arm and opening the door for her. The bell jingled again.
“B
ye,” Adam said. As she walked out of the store, she could feel Adam’s gaze on her. Chelsea had always sensed an undercurrent of emotion between them. Maybe it was chemistry or maybe they’d just clicked as friends. Since neither of them ever mentioned it Chelsea had no idea where Adam stood. He’d never asked her out on a real date, and if he had, Chelsea had no idea how she would respond. How do you suddenly date someone that you used to throw water balloons at when you were nine years old?
It doesn’t matter anyway, she reminded herself. Adam was definitely going to make some lucky girl very happy—if he wasn’t already—but she already had a boyfriend. Jeff. The one who hadn’t called or texted all day. She slipped her phone from her purse and confirmed what she already knew.
As Chelsea crossed the parking lot and walked along the cracked sidewalk through the decaying neighborhood toward her house, thoughts of both Jeff and Adam disappeared. All she could think about was that in one week, Greg Foster would no longer be behind bars, no longer be locked up and away from society. He would be free; and that in and of itself was a very scary thought.
Two
Bad Things Happen to Good People
The walk from Mikey’s store to the double-wide mobile home where Chelsea lived with her father wasn’t long, but Chelsea knew it was best to stay alert and watch out for danger. A couple of months back, she’d been walking during the day when she spotted a stray dog scampering down the other side of the street. When she stopped, the dog stopped too and then let out a low, gravelly growl as it began to slink toward her. Lucky for Chelsea, a car came speeding around the corner at that moment and the dog took off running. Creepy dogs weren’t the only kind of threat Chelsea looked out for on her walks home. It wasn’t uncommon to see transients curled up on the porches of abandoned houses or hear the sound of domestic fighting through the open windows. Chelsea rarely felt unsafe, but that’s because her father had taught her long ago to always be aware of what was going on around her.
Tonight, however, Chelsea was having a hard time paying attention to potential threats in the three-quarter-mile walk to the trailer park. She was distracted thinking about the night Greg Foster came running out of Mikey’s store.
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