by B. B. Hamel
I can’t help myself. I’ve never bothered getting close to a woman before, not with my job. I travel too much, and I don’t need to settle down. I’m damn good at leaving them wanting more, begging for me, moaning for another taste. But I’ve never wanted to take a woman and keep her like I do in this moment.
It’s strange. The other half of me hates this situation and hates all of the men involved. If I could, I’d take the girl and get her out right now. I could do it, too. These guys are all weak and soft, and all we’d need to do is get out of this building. Once we’re in Mexico, getting her out is going to be difficult.
Saving her isn’t my main priority, though. As fucked up as that is, I can’t just take this girl and save her.
That’s not what her father wants.
I still remember the afternoon that I received that order from the man himself.
Rufus Nosek sits behind a large, mahogany desk. I spent the morning poring over a dossier on his daughter, and could still feel the anger inside of me at the men who would take her. I want to kill them, slaughter them, but I’ll have to be patient.
“Do you know why you’re here, Logan?” Rufus Nosek asks me.
“You want me to save your daughter.”
He smiles at me, a cruel and wicked smile. He’s a harsh man, with thinning gray hair and a traditional black suit. He’s thin and tall and his nose is hooked like a hawk’s beak. He stares at me with those animal eyes and I can’t read him at all, not one bit. He doesn’t seem upset or angry over the disappearance of his daughter, which confuses me more than anything else.
“Not exactly,” he says finally. “Do you want your mission?”
I nod once, unsure of what’s happening.
“I don’t know what your superiors told you,” he continues, “but this mission isn’t to simply rescue my daughter. That’s part of it, of course, and if she dies then you will be held accountable. No, this is more about revenge.”
“Understood,” I say, waiting to hear the rest of the mission.
“Of course,” he says, that smile still on his face. “Your true mission, though, is to gather enough intelligence to take down their entire operation. I want you to dismantle them from the inside. The bastards killed my daughter’s best friend. Her body was found in the river yesterday morning. Nice girl named Lacey. I don’t want that to happen to anyone else, Logan. Get us names, locations, numbers, everything. Only then, once you’re ready to call in your people, will you be allowed to take my daughter from there.”
I watch him quietly for a moment, letting that sink in. His face is still smiling but it doesn’t reach his eyes at all. I can tell that he’s a snake wearing human skin, and he’d do anything to get what he wants.
“I may have to ...do things to keep my cover,” I say slowly, wanting him to understand what he’s asking of me.
“Do whatever you have to do.” He smiles big. “Make sure she doesn’t die. Otherwise, follow your orders.”
I nod and stand. I know what I have to do. I don’t like it, not one bit, but I won’t turn away from a mission. I’m not a weak man. I can do what has to be done.
But I’ve never had a woman’s father give me permission to take his daughter however I want for the greater glory of the mission.
Her father is a monster, but one that believes the means justify the ends. I can see some of him in her, or at least in the way she stares at me with that barely contained ferocity. She’s like a caged animal ready to strike, and that excites me.
I have permission from her father and from my superiors to do whatever must be done. I can’t kill her or let her be killed, but I can hurt her if I want to. I can do even more than that.
I won’t, not if I can avoid it. I won’t hurt her. I may need her to submit, to do things she’s not sure she’s prepared to do, but I won’t hurt her. I’ll win her trust and she’ll willingly play along.
I know she will. It’ll feel too good for her to say no.
“Sit down,” I say to her finally, indicating the chair.
She hesitates then walks over to it. She sits down, hands folded in her lap, back straight. She almost looks like a perfect rich little lady, but I can already see the truth.
Riley is mine. Her body is mine to do with whatever I want, and already I can feel the dirty thoughts pressing in at the corners of my mind. I want to take her, and can right this moment if I really want to.
But that’s not who I am. I won’t let this situation corrupt me any more than it already has. She’ll have to ask for it, beg for it, before I’ll let her have it.
“Do you know why you’re here?” I ask her, standing at the edge of the light.
“No,” she says softly. “I was in a club. Someone gave me a drink. And then ...” She trails off, her eyes haunted.
“You were taken.”
“Yes. I was taken.” She looks at me. “What happened to my friend? Is Lacey okay?”
I cock my head at her, filing that away for later. “Don’t worry about Lacey,” I say. “Worry about yourself.”
“Please,” she whispers. “I need to know.”
“Do you really need me to say it?”
Her face sinks. “She’s dead.”
“And you’ll end up like her if you don’t obey.” I hate doing this to her, but she needs to be broken.
“I’ve been good,” she says, looking down at the floor. “I do what I’m told. I don’t fight back.” She looks back up at me and I get a glimpse of anger before she looks back down. “I just want to survive this.” She’s clearly holding back tears, which is admirable. I’m sure she’s going to grieve her friend, but she doesn’t want to do it in front of me.
“Good,” I say. “Are you willing to do whatever you need to?”
“Yes,” she says.
I walk toward her, smiling slightly at her. “I don’t think you understand what you’re agreeing to.”
“Maybe not,” she says. “But I’m stronger than you think.”
“Oh, I believe you,” I say, crouching down in front of her. “But you and I, we’re in this together now, Riley. If you want to survive, you’re going to have to do whatever I ask.”
“Who are you?” she whispers.
“I’m the man that’s going to own you. That’s all you need to know.” I put my hand on the armrest of her chair. “Do you understand, that, Riley? Your life, your body, it’s all going to be mine.”
“I understand.” She’s biting back tears and I hate myself for what I’m doing.
“You’ll survive this. If you listen to me.” I pause, hesitating, but I plunge forward. “I won’t hurt you and I won’t take you against your wishes. But if you disobey me, or if you break a rule, I will punish you. Understand?”
“Yes,” she says.
“You can hate me,” I say quietly, “but you will obey me. You’ll get through this if you do.”
She looks away from me, fighting to keep her tears back. I stand up and walk across the room again, feeling conflicted as hell.
How far can I push this girl before we both break? I don’t think I have an answer for that question. I’ve done things in my life, hard and awful things, but always for the greater good. What I’ll do to Riley will be for the greater good, too, but she won’t know it. Her suffering will be my fault. I can do everything in my power to make this as painless as possible for her, but in the end I’m going to have to go through the motions.
I have to convince Anton and his people that I’m for real. I can’t just go easy on Riley if I’m going to be able to move around the Mexican compound freely. Things are only going to get more difficult from here on out, and I’ll need to use all of my skills to get through this.
I hope Riley is stronger than she appears. Because she’s going to need every ounce of that strength.
I leave the room and let the door shut behind me. Now, we travel south, and the real training begins.
5
Riley
After Logan leaves, the bald
man comes back into the room and throws another change of clothes at me. This time, it’s a pair of sweats that are comfortable but too big. Once I’m dressed, he puts a hood over my head.
My world plunges into blackness.
I’m led from the room, stumbling in the darkness. I walk for what feels like a long time until I’m put into a van. I can hear other girls nearby, feel them bumping against me, but we don’t talk to each other. We’re all too afraid.
Lacey is dead. I can hardly believe it. I knew something bad happened to her . . . but this? I sob in the back of that van, trying to be quiet, but unable to stop myself. I don’t understand why she’s dead and I’m still alive. I don’t deserve it.
She was so good. She was alive and vibrant and exciting. The only reason we were out that night was because I needed it. We both knew it. She took me out because I desperately needed some time to have fun
And now she’s dead because of it. She’s dead because of me. I feel a deep hole in my heart and it’s filled with sand, sadness, dread.
The van drives for a while and eventually stops. We’re unloaded from the van and our hoods are removed. I’m numb to everything. I can’t feel right now. I can’t think. Otherwise I’ll break down again.
I blink at my surroundings. We’re standing on the tarmac of an airport, or at least that looks like it used to be an airport. Maybe just a small regional one. Either way, it’s empty except for a single plane. Men with guns stand around and I’m in a pack of maybe fifteen other girls. I recognize some from earlier, but most of them are strangers.
The men with guns shepherd us onto the plane. We’re shoved into the back cargo area and made to lie down. We have no seatbelts or cushions and the hard steel is rough against my body.
The plane takes off. It’s the most horrible ride of my life.
Things only get worse when we land.
It’s still night when we’re unloaded. The men all have guns, but it’s hot as hell and it looks like we landed somewhere in a desert. We’re herded into a few trucks and I realize that everyone is speaking Spanish.
Another long car ride. I watch the countryside flash by outside, and I know we must be in Mexico somewhere based on the language and the buildings. After an hour of driving, I can see the ocean, and we pull into a large, walled compound.
After that, we’re led individually into the building. I try to look around, but they move us too quickly. A man with a gun shoves me into a room, shuts the door, and locks it.
I collapse onto the bed of my new cell and try not to let myself break down into tears.
I’m a long way from home now. I’m even further away from my father and from rescue. If I thought I had a chance in America, I really can’t imagine that I have one now. Nobody is coming for me.
And yet, I suddenly start thinking about Logan. He didn’t seem like every other man I’ve met so far. In fact, he seemed like he wanted to reassure me, to make me know that I’d survive this. He was even gentle and kind to me, although he did tell me that I was going to be his.
My feelings are strangely conflicted when it comes to him. We only spoke briefly, but he was handsome, so damn handsome, better looking than any man I’d ever been around before. And he seemed like he actually cared about whether I lived or I died.
I don’t know how long I lie there, but eventually I close my eyes and drift off to sleep. Time passes without any dreams, and suddenly I wake up, taking a deep, gasping breath. Disoriented, I look around the room.
And spot Logan standing in the corner, watching me.
I stare at him, not moving, not blinking. He watches me back and doesn’t say a word. Finally, he crouches down beside the bed.
“How was the trip?” he asks.
“Not good,” I say, trying not to think about it. I don’t want to remember being treated like luggage.
“It’s over now,” he says. “You’re in your new home. Welcome to Mexico.”
I watch him for a moment. “Why are we here?” I ask.
“A lot of reasons,” he says. “But mainly because it’s cheaper and easier to keep you here than it is to keep you in America. This place is practically a fortress.”
I stare into his handsome face and have the strange sudden impulse to reach out and touch him. “I didn’t think you’d be here,” I blurt out instead.
He smiles at me. “You’re mine now. Wherever you go, I go.”
“And you don’t want to hurt me,” I say softly. “Why not let me go?”
“I can’t do that.”
I sit up and look around the room quickly. There’s a toilet in the corner and I’m on a bunk with a thin mattress. Other than that, it’s just like the cell I had just left, though slightly bigger. My gaze returns to Logan and he’s watching me curiously.
“What’s going to happen to me?” I ask him.
“I’m going to train you,” he says.
“Train me how?”
“I’m going to make you obedient.”
“What am I going to have to do?” I ask, terrified of the answer but knowing it already.
“You’re going to learn to give up your body on command,” he says softly. “You’re going to let me tease that tight pussy of yours until you scream. You’re going to suck my cock until you gag and then you’ll beg me to come down your throat.”
He pauses and I can feel a thrill run through me as I picture each act. I can practically feel his thick cock between my lips and it makes my pussy clench with excitement. I’m dripping wet although it’s crazy, fucked up, wrong. Maybe I’m sick or something worse, but I want all of these things.
“I’m going to train you to be the perfect little fuck doll for me, Riley,” he says, and a shiver runs down my spine.
I want it. It’s so wrong, so dirty and deliciously wrong, but I want it. I need to feel something that isn’t just boredom and pain. I’ve been locked in a cage for so long now, and Logan is the first man to really seem like he cares about me. He said he won’t do anything without my consent, and I don’t know why I believe him, but I do. Maybe he doesn’t really care about me but at least he’s not actively hurting me, and that’s a step up from the other men in my life up to this point.
But I won’t just be some guy’s toy. He’s a total stranger and I’m not just going to give myself to him. I want to survive this, but at what cost? I don’t want to survive this as a used up, broken husk of what I used to be. I can’t do it, I won’t do it.
I’ve let men push me around my whole life. I let my father abuse me all he wanted, that bastard, and I won’t let this guy get away with it.
“No,” I say, surprising myself.
He raises an eyebrow. “You have no other choice.”
“No,” I say again. “I won’t.”
“You will.” He leans forward. “Or you’ll be hurt far worse than anything I’ll do to you. They’ll tear you to pieces, Riley, and pass you around like a fucking toy.”
I bite back tears, but not fast enough. I look away, not wanting to be weak in front of him.
“You can cry, but that doesn’t change anything. You’re mine. Play along and you might survive this.”
I glare at him. “Fuck you.”
He smiles. “Soon enough.” He stands up and leaves the cell. I hear the door lock behind him.
I collapse back onto my bed, feeling like a child as the tears stream down my face. I want to be strong, I want to survive, but I’m torn in half. I don’t know if I can trust Logan. I don’t know if he has my best interests at heart, or if he just wants to use and abuse me.
There’s no way of knowing. Part of me is attracted to him, and there’s no denying that. But I can’t just throw myself at him. I can’t just let him train me.
I have to be strong and I have to be smart. There’s a way out of this, I just have to be patient. It’ll come to me.
I get myself under control and burrow under the single scratchy blanket, dreaming of what I’ll do next.
6
Log
an
Waves crash over the rocks as I lean against the compound’s outer wall, taking a short break. I could probably climb to the top of the wall, or find some way to slip out, but I don’t want to risk getting caught.
Mostly, I just need a break. It drains me more than I thought it would, treating Riley like that. I want to pull her out of here, but I can’t do it. I’m trained to follow through with my mission no matter what happens, and that’s what I’m going to do. Even if it means going against my own feelings or emotions and doing things that I don’t want to do.
I haven’t pushed her yet, but I know I’m going to. She knows it too. She can see it in my gaze. I keep telling her that it’ll be best if she listens and obeys, but the way she lashed out earlier surprised me. She seemed like she was actually going to come at me, and for a moment I braced myself. But then she broke down into tears, and I had to get out of there.
I push off the wall, trying to shove my conflict down deep inside of me. On the one hand, I do want the girl, and will take her when the time comes. But on the other, I don’t hurt innocent people, and I know Riley is an innocent.
It just means I have to make her want it. And by the way she reacted when I talked dirty to her, I don’t think that’s going to be too hard.
I walk along the outer wall, following it all the way around the compound. So far, from what I can tell, the place is made up of a large wall surrounding what seems to be four big buildings in total with several smaller ones scattered around. The main buildings house the girls and the guards. The other buildings serve a few different purposes, but I’m not entirely sure what yet.
Guards are posted at every corner of the wall and at the entrance. They’re well-armed, but they don’t look like military regulars. I don’t know how many guards are in the place yet, but it looks to be about thirty, maybe fifty at most.