by Sarah Price
Eleanor forced a small smile. “I am sure you do, Lydia.” She reached up for the Tupperware and handed one container to Lydia. The irony of Edwin’s intended seeking relationship advice from her was not lost on Eleanor. Given the state of her own heart, she was, after all, the last person to advise another on matters related to love. “I’m sure Roy will understand when”—she paused as she tried to gain the strength to say his name—“Edwin announces your betrothal to the family.”
Delighted with Eleanor’s response Lydia laughed and clutched the container to her chest. “Oh, you’ve made me feel ever so much better! I simply couldn’t have my future brother-in-law think I snubbed him as inferior!”
When Lydia turned and walked toward the stairs, a new lightness in her step, Eleanor took a deep breath. Was that the reason Edwin had never told her about his betrothal to Lydia? Had he felt that she, Eleanor Detweiler, was inferior and therefore easy to snub? For a moment her heartache turned to anger and disappointment. How could Edwin have treated her in such a callous manner?
But just as quickly, the negative thoughts disappeared.
Carrying the plastic containers in her arms, Eleanor started up the stairs to return to the kitchen. She couldn’t blame Edwin for the way she felt. He had neither asked for her affection nor misled her in any way. He had offered friendship, not marriage. He had shown kindness, not disdain. Yet as she ascended the staircase, she couldn’t help but wonder why, despite his proper conduct that defied the need for any reproach, she still felt such an aching pain deep within her heart.
Chapter Eighteen
EARLY IN THE morning on Friday Eleanor sat outside on the porch, working on embroidering a small white handkerchief. A cool breeze blew from the west, and with the sun rising behind a large tree, it was the perfect morning for some reflection. Charlotte had already insisted that everyone take a nice long walk over to her sister-in-law’s farm down the lane for morning muffins. Mary Ann had eagerly agreed, hoping she might see Willis drive by in his buggy. Eleanor, however, begged off, and to her surprise, no one made a fuss over her staying behind.
She had watched as Charlotte, Widow Jennings, and Mary Ann herded the small children down the sidewalk and away from town. With each step they took, Eleanor had felt a little more relaxed. When they vanished from sight, she had rested her head on the back of the rocking chair, engaging in a private conversation with God as she prayed for the strength to survive until Monday.
“Gut morgan,” a male voice said from the sidewalk just beyond the porch.
Surprised, Eleanor looked up and, to her further astonishment, saw Christian Bechtler approaching the steps to the front porch. “Preacher!” She set down her embroidery and quickly stood up to greet him halfway, her hand outstretched to shake his. “How wunderbarr to see you!”
He gestured toward the rocking chair, indicating that she should sit. Politely he waited for her to be situated before he joined her, occupying the remaining chair. “I ran into Charlotte the other day. She told me you were visiting for the fund-raiser.”
“I didn’t know you were staying in Honey Brook,” Eleanor said. “You’ve been greatly missed at Quarryville. I trust all is well?”
Christian averted his eyes and seemed to ponder his response. After a hesitation he nodded. “Ja, I am well. I do apologize for my abrupt departure the other week.” He looked up, forcing himself to meet her eyes. “I had some unfortunate news, Eleanor. Nothing less would have torn me away from my g’may and my business.”
She had never doubted that and felt certain that all of the church district felt the same way. Still, that had not stopped others from speculating and whispering about what could possibly have kept Christian Bechtler away for so long. Eleanor, however, had not inquired, and if she heard the whispers, she merely walked away or changed the subject.
Christian cleared his throat and looked around as if searching for other people. “You are alone, then?” he asked.
“Ja,” Eleanor said. “The others have gone visiting. We’ll be baking more this afternoon for the fund-raiser, so the time alone in the house is precious, indeed.”
He smiled a soft and gentle smile that spoke of his understanding her need for some peace and quiet, an escape from the constant chatter of Charlotte and the ruckus of the boys. “I’m sorry Mary Ann isn’t here to see you,” Eleanor added. “She will be sorry to have missed you, for sure and certain.”
At this comment, a dark cloud passed over his eyes and he lifted his chin. “Ah, Mary Ann,” he said in a low voice. “I am, in fact, glad she is not here, Eleanor. It is you to whom I wish to speak.”
“Me?” Eleanor frowned, his admission startling her. What could Christian Bechtler possibly want to see her for?
Christian stood up, his hands clutched behind his back as he began to pace the length of the porch. He seemed lost in thought again, and Eleanor gave him that time to gather his words. Whatever he wanted to say, it was apparently difficult. She could hardly imagine why Christian Bechtler would have sought out her company for something of such obvious importance.
“Mary Ann,” he began. “Is she”—he stopped pacing for a moment—“is she still intent on Willis?”
Biting the corner of her lip, Eleanor slowly nodded her head. She suspected how he felt about Mary Ann, and despite their age differences she had hoped there might be a connection between the two. His maturity and level-headedness would counter Mary Ann’s propensity for drama and emotional outbursts. While she wanted to spare his feelings, she almost knew that honesty was the best policy for her response.
“I’m fairly certain the answer is yes, Christian.”
“And, would you say, if things were not to work out as she intends, that she would be heartbroken?”
Eleanor nodded slowly. With Mary Ann’s heart so intent on Willis as her future husband, there was little room to doubt that, should things not work out as she intended, she would suffer gravely, both internally and externally.
The thought made Eleanor cringe.
He nodded and began pacing again. “I will pray that her heart heals quickly.”
His words struck Eleanor as being very cryptic. Eleanor had not thought highly of Willis for leaving her sister in such an emotionally distraught state. But Christian had not been in Quarryville when Willis left. Had word traveled about his desertion? Of course, Eleanor realized suddenly, Christian must have heard about it from Charlotte.
“I trust from your words that you have heard of his leaving almost as abruptly as you did,” Eleanor responded at last.
This caught Christian off guard, and he stood still. “I have not.”
“Then you must be referring to something else.” Eleanor got to her feet and walked toward Christian. “Please, tell me what you know. I fear my schwester’s heart is quite vulnerable right now.”
For a long moment he contemplated her request, his eyes searching hers. There was a look of pain on his face, and Eleanor knew that whatever he needed to tell her, he did not want to share. However, he nodded once again. “I’m afraid I must start at the beginning, Eleanor, so that you understand everything.”
“Oh my,” she whispered. “The beginning of what?”
The pacing began again. He ran his hand along the porch railing, tapping his fingers nervously against the corner pillar before he turned back. “When I was a young man, I fell in love with a woman.” He looked up, his cheeks turning pink. “You may have heard of this, ja?”
Eleanor nodded once.
“Ja, vell,” he continued. “She was so much like Mary Ann. She loved gardening and spoke her mind. Her emotions could never be contained. But she refused to take her kneeling vow. My parents feared I would leave the church, so they sent me to Ohio to work for my daed’s second cousin in his harness store. He claimed he wanted me to have more experience with making harnesses, but I knew the truth. When I returned . . . ” He took a deep breath before he said, “I learned that she had given birth to a child. A baby girl.”
/> Eleanor gasped. This was a part of the story she had not heard, and she was shocked at the instant thought that perhaps the illegitimate child might be Christian’s.
He quickly put her fears to rest when he recognized the very thought that plagued her. “Everyone thought the child was mine.” He paused, giving Eleanor enough time to realize the amount of pain Christian must have experienced if people speculated in such a manner. “Despite my protests, the bishop brought me before the elders with my parents present. The bishop asked me to confess what I knew. I explained that I had never known that woman. Not like that. My punishment for a crime I did not commit was shunning.”
“Oh, Christian!”
He nodded his head. “It was difficult because I knew the truth. The boppli was my bruder’s. I did not tell his secret.”
“How awful!” She could not imagine the man that stood before her experiencing such a horrific event. It would be traumatizing to say the least.
“But”—he held up his finger to indicate there was more to the story—“one night, my bruder did not come home. He left with the woman and the baby . . . A month later, a letter came explaining that my bruder married her and it was his boppli. They had moved to Philadelphia. They had a hard life, Eleanor. God knows I prayed for them, despite my broken heart.” He placed his hand over his chest. “When I heard that my bruder died, I went searching for his widow and the child. It took me over a year, and when I did, I brought them back to Honey Brook. At that time the mother was sick and her prognosis was as dire as my bruder’s. She made me promise to watch over the child, a promise I made and kept all of these years.”
Despite the tragic nature of his tale Eleanor remained silent, unable to speak or offer her empathy. She could tell from his hesitant manner that there was more to this story, and she could only presume that it would eventually get back to Mary Ann. She could not, however, imagine how.
“The child, a dochder, grew up with her maternal grandparents, but I helped financially support her and I checked on her as often as I could. She, like her own mother, grew into a beautiful and passionate young woman, wanting nothing more than to live life and be loved.” He inhaled and shut his eyes. “Mayhaps it was the loss of her maem or possibly the change in her lifestyle when she moved to the farm that made her rebel.”
“She was raised by her Amish grandparents, then?”
He pressed his lips together, the muscles in his cheek twitching ever so slightly. “Ja, she was. And they are most conservative, Eleanor. A shocking change for any child, I reckon. Despite everything I could do to help her, in the end she made her own decisions.” A car drove past the house, and Christian waited until the rumble of its engine dissipated down the road. Then, when they were once again standing in silence, he said, “At fifteen she was rebellious against the Amish faith and apparently vulnerable to sweet words spoken by someone who gave no thought to her future.”
Eleanor frowned. She suspected that his words were intentionally vague. A fifteen-year-old girl? “I don’t think I understand,” she said.
Christian opened his eyes and stared directly at her. “When I was called away, I learned that she, like her mother, became pregnant out of wedlock, Eleanor. And the father . . . ” He let his words linger and waited.
Slowly, like the morning sky changing colors as the sun rolls out of a night of slumber, the meaning of his words dawned on Eleanor. A fifteen-year-old girl? Having a child out of wedlock? Sweet words? As the pieces to his story began to fall into place, she slowly recognized how this terrible story connected to her sister. And when the full meaning became clear, she gasped, reaching out to hold on to the railing to steady herself. “Willis!”
Christian nodded his head. His expression told her that he had taken no joy in sharing the sordid details of his niece’s misdeeds.
“Oh, Mary Ann!” Eleanor whispered. Her mind raced, hearing the words of Widow Jennings and seeing Mary Ann’s defiance. Was it possible that Willis was such an ungodly man that he would have tempted Mary Ann to follow in the same path as Christian’s niece? Hadn’t Mary Ann gone to Willis’s aunt’s house unchaperoned? Her defiance when reprimanded had shocked Eleanor at the time. Now the memory of it gave Eleanor something to worry about. “You don’t think . . . ”
“What I think and what may or may not have happened are irrelevant, Eleanor.” He straightened his shoulders. “Willis’s aendi learned of his indiscretion as well as his denying any accountability or responsibility to my niece or the boppli. I have learned that his aendi promptly disinherited him. The families kept everything very quiet, but if he ran off abruptly, I imagine it was related to all of this. You must understand that I tell you this with the greatest of reluctance. It is with Mary Ann’s emotional well-being in mind that I confide this story.”
“Is . . . is he marrying your niece?”
Christian shook his head. “Nee, she is both a young woman and a child at the same time. Besides, she is not Amish, and marrying her would result in him having to leave the Amish church. That would mean shunning with no chance of exoneration. He has, after all, taken the kneeling vow.” Christian took a deep breath and exhaled before he turned to look at Eleanor. “As if this situation were not bad enough, Willis has refused responsibility for the boppli.”
Eleanor could not imagine what she would say to Mary Ann. How could she break the news to her sister that Willis had defiled a young girl and abandoned his own child? “I had been so certain he loved her,” she whispered.
“Of that I cannot speak my thoughts. His affections seemed genuine, Eleanor. But his intentions may not have been.” He reached out and touched her arm. “I tell you this to protect your schwester, not in the hopes that the information might aid my own pursuit of her interest. I am not such a fool as to think that Mary Ann’s affections for Willis would shift in my direction should she learn this tale.”
Long after Christian departed, Eleanor sat on the porch alone, pondering his words. She could hardly believe the story Christian had shared with her. Was it possible that John Willis was righteous on the outside but such a scoundrel on the inside? To take advantage of a young girl in such an unbiblical manner was beyond reprehensible! And to think that Christian’s niece now would have a child to care for without the benefit of a husband.
Eleanor stared into the distance, her mind trying to wrap around this information that Christian had shared with her. The thought that John Willis, the man her own dear sister favored over all others, had such a dark side made Eleanor feel a pit in her stomach. She would have to tell Mary Ann, but she didn’t know how to begin such a sordid tale. Would Mary Ann even believe her? Or would she simply think Eleanor was, once again, seeking to block her undisguised pursuit of Willis?
Chapter Nineteen
THE PARKING LOT behind the firehouse and the block in front of it were both closed off to motor vehicles and buggies. A crowd of people, both Englischers and Amish, gathered there, slowly meandering around the tables set out by the different vendors. Eleanor stood behind the table where Charlotte had set out their baked goods for display and sale. Mary Ann lingered by the front of the table, her eyes constantly scanning the crowd as she sought out the only person Eleanor hoped she did not find.
“Where is he?” Mary Ann muttered, brushing off something from the front of her black waist-high apron. She had taken extra time to get ready today, preening in front of the small mirror to make certain every hair was smoothed back and her prayer kapp pinned perfectly so that the heart shape lay just right against the back of her head. “I’m sure he will be here!”
Eleanor tried to maintain a level head. She had struggled with Christian Bechtler’s tale, wondering whether she should share it with Mary Ann. After a long, sleepless night Eleanor decided against telling her. Whatever had happened between the two of them, Mary Ann did not need more pain than she would feel when she realized that Willis had not returned correspondence with her for a reason.
Trying to distract her sister, Eleano
r bent down and pulled out a large box filled with baked goods. “Mary Ann, I could use your help,” she said, standing upright and looking at her. “We should unpack more bread. It seems to be quite popular.”
Ignoring Eleanor, Mary Ann continued gazing into the crowd. She even stood on her tippy toes to peer over the heads of the crowd, not even moving out of the way of two women who needed to pass through.
“Honestly, Mary Ann!” Eleanor snapped. She hadn’t expected to react like that to her sister, but the knowledge that Willis was such an unscrupulous man coupled with Mary Ann’s ignorance of his character irritated her. “You look more forlorn than a whimpering child. Please pay attention and help me!”
Eleanor’s harsh tone snapped Mary Ann out of her single-minded mission to find Willis. She glared at Eleanor and stomped around the table. “Is restocking bread really so difficult, Eleanor?” She bent over the box and began rifling through it to find what she needed. When it wasn’t in that particular box, she shoved it back under the table and reached for another box of baked goods. With a lot of huffing and puffing, she began unpacking more of the wrapped bread. “There!” She stood up and faced her sister. “Are you happy now, then? There is your bread!”
“Mary Ann!”
Without hesitation she returned to her post and continued searching the crowd for Willis.
Eleanor rolled her eyes and rearranged the loaves of bread so that the table looked more orderly. She was about to say something else to Mary Ann, to scold her about her obvious lack of interest in the fund-raiser when that was why they were there, when she felt a presence behind her.