She got all the way across the dark yard, up the steps and inside without meeting a single soul. The house was quiet. She dropped to the straight chair in the foyer to tug off her boots. Then, on stocking feet, she ran up the stairs to her room and quietly shut the door. Leaning back against it, she let go of the boots.
They thudded to the floor. The sound of them dropping finished her somehow. She broke.
Her knees buckled. She slid down the door, buried her head in her hands and let the tears fall.
How long did she crouch there, knees drawn up under her chin, crying like a silly twit for a guy who didn’t want her?
Way too long.
Finally, on shaky legs, she pushed herself upright again. She should wash her face, brush her teeth.
But she had no energy for any of that. Instead, she peeled off her maid-of-honor dress and fell across the bed in her lacy underwear.
She tried to sleep. Maybe she did sleep a little, dropping off exhausted. But then she jolted awake to remember that it had all gone bad and she could only stare at the far wall through another bout of sheer misery. She couldn’t wait for daylight when she could pack up her stuff, throw it all in her Audi and get out of town.
At the crack of dawn, she snuck down the hall for a quick shower and to finally brush her teeth. Back in her room again, she packed like a madwoman, only pausing to wipe away the damn tears that wouldn’t stop falling.
In fifteen minutes flat, she was ready to go. Her crammed-full suitcases waited against the wall. Her computer equipment was unplugged, unhooked and disassembled, stacked beside her bags. As she glared at it all and tried to decide what to haul downstairs first, someone tapped on the door.
“Amy?” Mikayla. “Eva’s got breakfast ready downstairs.”
Amy stood frozen. If she opened the damn door, Mikayla would see it all—her red, runny nose and bloodshot eyes, the stupid tears that kept spilling over and dribbling down her blotchy face.
Mikayla rapped on the door again. “Amy, are you in there?”
“I’m here,” she gave out reluctantly. Her voice sounded like a couple of pieces of coarse sandpaper rubbing together.
“Amy, what’s going on?” The real concern in Mikayla’s tone had the tear factory going great guns all over again. “Why didn’t you go to Derek’s for the night?”
She yanked the door wide. “Don’t mention that name.” She glowered at the woman she’d begun to think of as a friend.
Mikayla’s pretty face scrunched up with sympathy and concern. “Aw, honey. What’s happened?” She held out her arms.
That did it. Amy threw herself against Mikayla’s big belly and sobbed out brokenly, “Derek ended it. I thought we were together. But, he called it off with me. I left some of my stuff at his house and I still have his key and I don’t even have the energy to go over there, get my things and throw the key in his face. Everything is... I don’t know how to even tell you. It’s awful. Terrible. So much worse than bad...”
“Oh, sweetie. Oh, hon...” Mikayla stroked her back, ran her hands down Amy’s arms. “Whatever it is, you’ll work it out. It’ll be okay.”
“No, it won’t. It never will. He hurt me so bad. He did it again, because, you know, I guess once just wasn’t enough.”
Mikayla took her by the shoulders and guided her backwards to the bed. “Sit down.” Amy obeyed. Grabbing the box of tissues on the nightstand, Mikayla took Amy’s hand. She plunked the tissues in it. “Blow your nose and stay right there. I mean it. Do. Not. Move.”
“Fine,” she replied—except it came out “Fide” because she really did need the tissues.
Mikayla took off through the door. Amy heard her footsteps going down the stairs.
Two minutes later, Mikayla was back, this time with Eva. They hovered in the doorway.
“Amy, what’s happened?” Eva cried, which only caused Amy to burst into tears all over again.
The two women flew to her side. They sat on the bed, Eva on her right and Mikayla on her left, and wrapped their arms around her while she cried some more.
At least that storm of weeping didn’t last long. “I think I’m pretty close to cried out,” she confessed after blowing her nose for about the hundredth time.
“Talk,” ordered Eva. “Tell us everything so we can help.”
Amy looked from one dear, concerned face to the other. All these years and years she’d told no one what had happened the summer she was eighteen.
And look how well that had gone.
Not well at all.
So, she blew her nose one more time and she did what Eva demanded. She talked.
She told them everything, about the past, the baby that maybe wasn’t, about the wedding at the courthouse, about how true Derek had been to her, right there for her when she needed him most, about the cheap motel and the trucks going by on the highway. About how it all ended, about how she came back nine years ago to talk to him and he came to CU to find her, but neither of them knew the other had tried to reach out.
About how it all started up again when she came back for the wedding, about how she’d really believed they would make it this time. How she’d made arrangements with her boss so she could live right here in Rust Creek Falls, how she’d braced her father and he’d ended up admitting that he believed Derek really did love her, that her dad had wished her happiness with the man she’d never stopped loving.
And then how, last night, Derek had broken her heart all over again.
“He doesn’t want me. He doesn’t love me. He told me he had a great time the last couple of weeks. He said to have a nice life and he left me under that big tree between the house and the barn.” Amy gave one last sniffle and wiped her nose.
Eva asked gently, “Is that it? Is that all?”
“Isn’t that enough?” Amy cried.
And Mikayla said, “Well, there’s just one little problem...”
Amy slid her a suspicious glance. “What?” she grumbled.
Mikayla wrapped an arm around her. “Well, honey. The problem is that you’ve got it all wrong.”
Amy sputtered in outrage, but before she could argue, Eva backed Mikayla. “She’s right, Amy. Derek loves you.”
“No, he—”
“Yes.” Eva sat tall and spoke firmly. “His love is written all over his face every time he looks at you.”
Mikayla took Amy’s hand and put it on the round crest of her own belly where her unborn baby slept. “A man who stands by you, who makes you know that you’re wanted when things get rough... A man like that is worth fighting for. And he did stand by you, way back when. He was there when you needed him the most. Try looking at it from his point of view, why don’t you? Your father finally told you what really happened. Derek stepped aside so that you could have the education you’d worked so hard for.”
Amy gulped and nodded. “I know. I realize now that he did what he did then for me and that I was too hurt and confused to see it at the time.”
“Kind of like now?” Eva suggested gently.
“No!” Amy argued. “It’s not like now—okay, yeah. I’m hurt and confused now, but I told him I don’t want to go. I told him I want to stay, to be with him.”
“That’s lame,” Mikayla said.
“Lame!” Amy practically shouted.
Mikayla didn’t even flinch. “Yeah, lame. If you want to make it work this time, I think you’re going to have to say right out loud that you love him and that you’re ready now to stand by him like he once stood by you. You have to be strong and you have to be clear. You have to know in your heart that what you had with him—what you could have again if you don’t give up now—is what matters most. Love. That’s what you had and that’s what you still have. Just don’t quit on love. Because a guy who steps up, that’s a guy worth fighting for.”
Eva asked, “Last night, did you tell him in so many words that you love him? Did you say that you want to stay here in town, that you’ve talked to your boss and you can work right here
and still keep your job?”
“I never got a chance. He didn’t let me.”
“Make the chance,” Mikayla and Eva insisted in unison.
“But what if he just says no to me again?”
“Then you’ll know for sure,” replied Mikayla.
Deep down, Amy did understand what her friends were trying to tell her, but the brokenhearted, scared little girl inside her just had to ask, “I’ll know what for sure?”
“That you gave him your all. You gave your love every possible chance. If you go all the way and he still turns you down, at least you’ll always know that this time you did everything you could to make it work.”
Eva’s hand, light as a breath, stroked Amy’s hair. “We know you’re scared. You wouldn’t be human if you weren’t. It’s okay to be scared. What’s not okay is to give up without first giving love everything you’ve got.”
“I just...what if I’m only asking for more heartache?”
Mikayla snort-laughed. “Have you seen yourself? You’re about at max heartache now. Giving your all is only going to make you stronger.”
Was it? Really?
Amy had serious doubts on that score.
And yet, she knew the truth when she heard it. Her friends were right. She hadn’t gone all the way last night, hadn’t really put her heart right out there. She’d failed to declare her love out loud.
She needed to do that, once and for all.
If she didn’t, she would never know if, just maybe, they could have made it work.
“Okay,” she said to no one in particular as she jumped to her feet.
The two women on the bed stared up at her. “Okay, what?” demanded Mikayla.
“Okay, I’m going for it.”
“Yes!” Eva shoved both fists high in the air as Mikayla muttered, “Finally.”
Amy strode to the foot of the bed. From there, she paced back and forth. “Chances are he’s at the ranch. But no matter where he is, he’ll have to go home eventually. When he gets there, I’ll be waiting for him and I’ll pull out all the stops this time to get through to him.”
Eva got up and came to her. With a cry, Amy grabbed for her friend. And then Mikayla was there, too. The three of them held each other good and tight.
“All right then,” Amy said at last as the other two stepped back. She smoothed her hair and straightened her shirt. “I know I look like I cried all night.”
“You look beautiful,” said Eva.
“Not true. But I’ll take it. Wish me luck.”
“We wish you love,” said Mikayla. “Because that’s what matters most.”
* * *
They walked her downstairs. She hugged them once more at the door and went out alone—and got only as far as the top step that led down to the yard and her dusty Audi waiting in the morning sun.
She stopped when she heard a truck approaching. The sun was wicked bright, so she brought her hand up to shade her poor, tired eyes.
And she saw Derek’s red pickup barreling along the driveway, coming right for her, kicking up a big plume of dust in its wake.
She stood there with her mouth hanging open as he skidded to a stop at the base of the steps. He flung his door wide and jumped out.
“Amy,” he said, his mouth grim and his jaw set. He strode up the stairs to her.
Oh, had any man ever looked so handsome, in good jeans and dress boots, a tan plaid shirt and a fine, gray hat?
“Amy.” He swept off his hat, tossed it over his shoulder and dropped to his knees. “Amy, I love you.”
Was he really here, kneeling before her? “Derek?” she asked, her voice barely a whisper, half-fearing she might be hallucinating from exhaustion and a long night’s worth of brokenhearted misery and crying jags.
He put a hand to his heart. “Amy, I was a pure coward yesterday and I didn’t sleep a wink all night. I’ve just been afraid, that’s all. Afraid that I was living in a fool’s dream, afraid that if I asked you to stay or offered to come live in Boulder with you, all I’d get was a flat no. I was so sure I was only going to end up losing you all over again. So, I went and beat you to the losing part. I said goodbye before you could. I told you it was over.
“Because I’m an idiot who tried to escape getting his heart broken by walking away first. An idiot who spent the rest of last night realizing that all I’d accomplished was the breaking of my own damn heart. So yeah. I’m an idiot, but I’m your idiot, Amy. If only you’ll have me.”
Her throat was clutching, more tears rising—but this time in the good way. This time with joy. “Yes! Yes, I will have you and love you and be yours. It’s all I ever wanted, Derek Dalton. I love you, too. And I want to move here, to Rust Creek Falls, where I’ve always dreamed I might someday make a home again. I want to move here and be with you—which reminds me, I failed to mention that I’ve got that all arranged. I talked to my bosses and they agreed I can make the move to Rust Creek Falls and still keep my job. And I talked to my dad and he admitted what he did, how he begged you to let me go that summer we got married, how he convinced you that my being with you would hold me back. He also said he’d had a feeling we would get back together and he was glad for us.
“Derek, I should have told you last night. I should have stood up and fought to make you see that I really do love you and want to be with you, only you. And I was coming to see you, just now, when you drove up, coming to tell you I want to move into your house on the Circle D with you. I want to love you and take care of you and have you take care of me and I want to do that for the rest of our lives.”
He gazed up at her, his gorgeous, messy hair flopping over his forehead, pure love in those incomparable green eyes of his. How could she not have seen it before? How could she not have known that he was hers if only she would reach out and claim him? “Wait!” he said with teasing urgency.
“What?” she asked, alarmed.
“Amy Wainwright, did you just tell me yes?”
“Derek, yes.” A goofy trill of laughter escaped her. “Yes, I said yes.” He pulled something from his pocket, something that shone so bright. She gasped. “Derek, is that...”
“Amy.” He reached out. “Will you give me your hand?”
“Yes.” She giggled again. “Somehow, I can’t stop saying yes.” He slipped the ring on her finger. It was perfect, with a large central diamond in a halo of smaller stones. “Oh, Derek. It’s just beautiful.”
He looked so earnest, staring up at her. “If you’d rather make the choice yourself—”
“No way. It’s mine and I’m keeping it. I love it.” She wrapped her other hand around it and brought both hands against her heart just as he swept upward to his full height. She swayed toward him.
“Amy. My love.” He gathered her close as she lifted her face to him. “I have a powerful feeling we’re going to make it this time.”
“Oh, Derek. Yes. Yes, we will make it. You and me and the rest of our lives. A home on the Circle D with you, and children, I hope. That’s what I want, Derek. That’s what we will have.”
He bent close and his lips touched hers. She surged onto her toes then, sliding her hands up over his broad shoulders to clasp them around his neck.
The kiss was long and slow and deep, sealing their promise, each to the other.
When she dropped back to her heels again and opened her eyes, he said, “I gave up on us twice, Amy—thirteen years ago and then last night. I’m done giving up. This time, it’s forever. I will never walk away again.”
She stroked the hair at his temple, traced the shape of his ear. “Good. Because I’m sticking with you now, no matter what. You are mine, Derek Dalton, and I am never letting you go.”
“That reminds me...” He reached in his breast pocket a second time, bringing out a thin gold chain with another ring at the end of it, a ring with a gold-tone band and a square-cut imitation diamond.
She let out a cry. “Oh, Derek. You kept it. You kept my ring for all these years.” She waved her h
and in front of her face. “Now, just look at me, crying all over again.”
“Turn around,” he instructed. Dashing away the pesky tears, she turned and lifted her hair off her neck so he could hook the clasp. “There,” he said. His warm lips brushed her nape.
She curled her fingers protectively over the old ring with her left hand, cherishing the feel of it, as her new ring glittered in the morning light. “So it was never lost, after all.” She turned to him again. “Thank you.”
He tipped up her chin and kissed her—first, her tear-wet cheeks and then her lips, a chaste kiss, infinitely sweet. As he lifted his head, she heard a sound from the house.
“Don’t look now,” she warned, “but I think we have an audience.”
The door was open just a crack. A grinning Eva pulled it wide. Behind her stood Luke, Mikayla and Bailey, too.
“About time,” muttered Luke.
“Congratulations,” said Eva. “Love wins out. It always does.”
Mikayla started clapping, causing the other three to follow suit.
Derek laughed, put his arm around Amy’s shoulders and pulled her close to his side. “She said yes,” he announced proudly. “She’s going to marry me—again.”
“I’m so glad,” Mikayla said.
“Again?” Bailey grumbled. “I’ll bet that’s a good story. And didn’t I tell you last night that you guys were fooling no one with your friends-only act?”
“Come on inside, you two.” Luke swept out a hand toward the house. “Eva’s got breakfast on.”
“French toast stuffed with cream cheese and blackberry jam,” Eva tempted them. “With whipped cream on top and your choice of syrup—oh, and hickory smoked bacon, because what’s a decadent after-wedding breakfast without a little bacon?”
“You’re on,” said Derek. “But give us a minute, okay? We’ll be right in.”
When Eva shut the door, Derek tugged Amy close again for another lovely, lengthy kiss. “Does it get any better than this?” he asked at last.
She beamed up at him. “I don’t see how it can, but I know that it will. Because we’re together now, for real. And I do honestly believe in us now. I know in my deepest heart that at last we are strong together, you and me, Derek. And I also know that through the years, we will only get stronger.”
A Maverick to [Re] Marry Page 17