Connegar stood at my back, hands on my shoulders when the first one walked through the shimmer. I don't think he was allowed to walk farther than he did, and I was glad. Even so, I backed against Connegar as far as I could. Edan Desh, the one I'd known growing up, stood before me.
"Reah." He dropped to his knees and bowed his head to the ground. I had no idea what he was doing.
"Now you recognize?" Conner's voice was hard and her eyes were bright as stars.
"I am not worthy to apologize," Edan mumbled.
"Will you not explain to her?" Conner asked.
"It is too terrible. I was wrong. I have to try harder next time."
"He is punishing himself," Connegar said quietly behind me.
"How is he punishing himself?" I looked up at the tall Larentii.
"He is planning his next lifetimes. He will suffer during those lifetimes. The Edan that Kifirin brought back has already suffered and his misdeeds are wiped away."
"You are not obligated to forgive me," Edan still hadn't looked at me.
"Stand up," I said. Edan stood, his head still bowed.
"Look at me." He lifted his eyes. Terrible sorrow clouded their depths. "I wanted you to love me," I said. "I didn't know why you wouldn't. I worked hard in the kitchen, thinking you would notice and give a kind word or something."
"I know that, now. Children are so vulnerable. They are born needing love. I robbed you of that. Twice. I was selfish and thought of myself and what I wanted." I looked into Edan's hazel eyes. He was being honest for a change. When I was growing up in the kitchens of Desh's number two, he'd seldom been honest—with anyone, including, most likely, himself. All had suffered at his hands who worked under him, but I was the one whose bones were broken.
"If I could take it all back now, I would," he said. "And not just because it would make my future lives easier. My path did not lie through this meadow," he sighed. "It lay through a dark land filled with sharp rocks that I walked through with no shoes. I was forced to walk through it with no help, daughter."
"Then I am sorry for you," I said. "I know what pain is, and it gives me pain to see another suffer, even if they are not kind."
"I know." Edan hung his head again. "I am so sorry. I see many things, now. And the ones who teach me show me many things. Point out others still struggling through their lives. Ask me what path they should take. I am learning."
"Do they love you?" I asked.
"Yes. And I am not deserving in this stage of my existence."
"We all learn things," I said. "Or we should. I wish it were a good thing to see you, Edan, but I have terrible memories."
"I know. And I understand that. I wish I could offer comfort, but I am not allowed to touch."
"And I cannot trust, because you did what you did, and then others that came after you did the same. And I wish I could trust, Edan. That was a gift that was stripped away at a very early age."
"If I could give you a gift, what would you have of me?" Edan asked.
"Something you can't give," I said. "I will never have a father's love. Not as it should be. A father loves and protects his child, don't you think? Do you know what it was that I did in the life before this one, to deserve what happened to me? Do you know?" I was wiping tears away.
"I am not allowed to give information," he said. "Seeing you is like a flower drinking in rain after a drought. I wish I'd lived my life better, so I would see my grandson."
"I suppose you will see him in a way," I said. "You in another life will see him, but we don't talk much because he wears your face and the memories are too difficult to bear. We will never be close, I think."
"Yes. They said that to me."
"It is time. Is there anything else you wish to say to Reah before you go back?" Conner asked.
"I wish I could have loved," he said. "I could have done so much for you. Good-bye, Reah. I wish you well." I watched him turn and disappear in the shimmer, trying not to sob.
The next one to walk through was almost as bad. Addah Desh stood before me, and he wept. "I take it back, I take it back," he sobbed. "Tell all of them I'm sorry and I take it back."
"Take what back?" My tears were dripping onto the flowers, and they bloomed even brighter around me. Addah's tears sizzled on the ground.
"The jealousy. The mistrust. The hate. I take it back."
"I think they only wanted your love, Addah," I lifted the sleeve of my caftan and wiped tears. My cheeks and fingers were soaked.
"I know. And I let Marzi tell me what to do with you. She said to send you to Shirves and to Edan. I think she goaded him to beat you. It didn't take much, as it turned out."
"No, I think he took pleasure in it," I agreed. "My childhood was far from happy."
"Yes. It was a terrible time. I should have paid more attention. I only had one use for women. In my next life I will be female, Reah. And I will suffer. Will you take pleasure in that?"
"What do you think, Addah? You think I take pleasure in another's pain?"
He blinked at me. "No." His eyes dropped. "I see that you don't. Do any of them have love for me? Do they?"
"I don't know, Addah. They seldom speak of you."
"Are they poor now? The ones who teach me refuse to let me see them, since I treated them so badly."
"No. What you withheld, I gave back to them. All your recipes I recreated and the restaurants are thriving, now. Uncle Fes refuses to marry, I think. I believe he worries that he will mistreat a wife or wives as you did."
"You recreated all of it? You gave it back, for nothing?" Addah was trying to understand that.
"Stop looking at things from that perspective," a shining being stepped through the shimmer and took Addah's hand. "Come, we will discuss this." The being nodded to Conner and then to Connegar and me before leading Addah back inside.
"Marzi has not learned enough to come through," Conner sighed. "It will take a while for her. The next one is a gift, before she goes into the world again." My mother stepped through the curtain.
"Reah, you are so beautiful," she said and I wept again. She looked so much like Glinda, only she had green eyes, as I do. "I am sorry I wasn't there to protect you. I know you missed that when you were little."
"You couldn't help it," I sobbed.
"Reah, don't cry. Things will come to you. I promise."
"But they left me nothing," I wept. "Not even a photograph. Like you didn't exist. And now my daughters have forgotten me, too. Like I don't exist. What terrible cruelty is this?" I dropped to my knees and shook with grief.
"Little one," someone knelt next to me. Placed a hand on my shoulder.
"Who are you?" I looked into his face, my eyes swimming with tears.
"I am Lendevik Lith," he said.
* * *
"Thank goodness," Edward jumped to his feet when Connegar and Nefrigar appeared in his kitchen. He'd waited up, hoping Reah would return. Reah slept in Nefrigar's arms.
"This has been a very trying day for my love," Nefrigar kissed Reah's forehead. "Take her to bed with you. Let her wake in your arms. The baby is restless," Nefrigar smiled about that. "I believe he is making up for lost time."
"No doubt," Edward smiled. Nefrigar handed Reah over.
* * *
"Reah, open your eyes. The sun is shining on the gishi fruit trees." Edward kissed my forehead.
"Honey?" I stared up at him. He was holding me, wrapped in blankets on the deck outside our connected suites. He set my feet on the smooth wood boards of the deck, kept his arms around me and leaned his chin on my head as we watched the sunlight move over the trees below us. "You were a genius to put the house here," I said.
"I built it for you," he kissed the top of my head. "My Elemaiyan grandfather is a foreseer. He described you to me. The funny thing is, I was attracted to a girl when I was young who had white hair. Grandfather told me that she wasn't you. He didn't give me a name; he said that would be a surprise. He also said you'd be pregnant when I found you. When Keed
an set you down at my table, he had no idea what you'd be to me. I sent him a case of wine afterward, plus a nice bonus."
"You're so good," I sighed.
"Reah, I can say the same thing to you. You are everything I dreamed of, only better. I was scared to death yesterday, when they had to fix you. I'm begging you not to let something like that happen again. I don't think my heart can stand it."
"I wasn't thrilled about it, either," I half-turned in his arms and tapped his nose with a finger.
"I know," he leaned down to kiss me. "They say no sex for four weeks. I think we'll go crazy in that time."
"And I'll be seven months pregnant and big as a house," I said.
"My erection might be almost as big by that time," he laughed.
"Farzi and Nenzi tell me that showers will fix that." Edward laughed harder. I was seated in the swing and breakfast was brought to the deck when the rest of them showed up. Chairs appeared everywhere, as did folding tables. Everybody was laughing, talking and eating.
"Here," Edward fed me a bite of ham. It was very good. Teeg knelt in front of me and put his hands on my belly. Garwin Wyatt was moving about as if he were happy about that.
"Honey, that's your daddy," I was rubbing my belly, too.
"Reah, are you feeling better today?" Teeg asked.
"I'm still a little sore. And I need to talk to Glinda."
"I can see if she'll come," he nodded.
"No, I need to go there," I said.
* * *
"Holy cow," Edward stared up at the life-size sculptures of High Demons in full Thifilathi that lined the hall inside the palace in Veshtul. The palace was amazing, until you saw what Lissa had. But then the same vampire had designed both. He'd saved the very best for Le-Ath Veronis, and I couldn't blame him.
"You wanted to see us?" Glinda asked as we were led into Jayd's private office.
"Yes," I nodded to her. "I have a message for you."
* * *
"We'll have to keep Reah away. She is in no shape to come," Renegar said. "It is fate that they're moving this quickly, but we will stand against them."
"We will stand against them," Kiarra smiled up at her son. "All of us. I've had visions of this, over the years. A last battle, with all of us charging the enemy. We'll do this. Win or lose, it'll all be out there."
"Yes, mother. It will. My son, the Wise One, and my grandson the Wise One say that we Larentii should hold back until the last. We will do so, although it may be difficult."
"Then that's what you should do," Kiarra said, rubbing his back affectionately.
* * *
"Before I deliver the message," I said, "I have to give you something." Glinda looked at me expectantly, but she wasn't expecting where I went. I walked to a corner of Jayd's study, where rows of tightly fitted stones butted against one another to form a right angle. Windows lined both walls on either side of those stones. One of the stones gave way when I pushed against it, revealing a small space inside. I pulled a velvet bag from that space while Glinda and Jayd watched. I handed the bag to Glinda, who stared at me, openmouthed. He said she'd know who sent the message when Glinda received the bag. She did. I could see the shock in her eyes.
"How did you?" She couldn't finish the question.
"He told me," I said, shrugging.
"What is this?" Jayd demanded. Glinda opened the bag and poured the contents onto Jayd's desk.
"He said Tarevik hunted high and low for these, after he took the throne by force. Without these, Tarevik would never have ruled. And Rorevik, after him, didn't find them. These belong to the ruling King. Given by Kifirin, long ago, to Glinda's father, Lendevik Lith. I saw him yesterday and he told me where to find them."
"But what are they?" Jayd asked, staring at the thumb-sized blue crystals.
"Kifirin's tears," I said.
Chapter 15
"My father said that Kifirin came to him, from the future," Glinda's voice was hushed. "He said that Kifirin gave him a secret that couldn't be repeated. My father let me hold these stones; he said that Kifirin cried these and they fell to the stone floor like this."
"But what was the secret?" Jayd asked.
"I wasn't told," I said. "All I know is that we'll all know, soon enough. Lendevik did ask me to give Glinda a message. He said to tell you that he still loves you." I watched as Glinda wiped a tear away. "And he also told me to say this: That Denevik should have given my middle name, and if he'd pulled his head out of his ass, he would have known it."
"Known what? And that's exactly how my father talked," Glinda wiped another tear away.
"That my middle name should have been Belarok. I'm ready to go, now." I walked out of Jayd's study, Teeg and Edward running to catch up to me.
* * *
"Jayd, we have to get her back," Glinda ran out the door. Their guests had already gone, though. Likely, Teeg had folded them away.
"You're saying that this is your mother, reborn?"
"My father said that," Glinda was weeping again. "This is awful." She picked up the blue crystals and placed them in the bag. "Reah won't ever return to us, and nobody could find these. Nobody."
* * *
The swing rocked gently as I sat on the deck outside my suite, staring across the groves of gishi fruit trees. The harvest was in and we were processing the last of the ice cream. It would take two months before another harvest of fruit would be ready. Orders were already placed for the ice cream we estimated would come from that harvest.
Adam, Merrill and the other new owners of NorthStar Groves had already agreed to provide us with their blemished fruit. Kevis came out to sit beside me, holding a cup of coffee. He didn't say anything, he merely sighed and sipped. My comp-vid vibrated in my pocket. I pulled it out to read the message. Shocked could only describe a little of what I felt, when I read the message and then saw who'd sent it.
"Would you like to come with me?" I looked at Kevis.
"I'll come, too." Edward appeared from nowhere.
"Good," I said, and skipped both of them away.
* * *
"Where are we?" Kevis craned his neck, looking around. A palace stood before us and tall, shapely buildings lined the street leading to it. The street was built of carefully placed stones, so closely matched and fitted that not even a blade of grass grew between them. The buildings and the palace were fashioned of gray stone that glittered in the early afternoon sunlight.
"This is Nrath," I said. "The Greater Demons' world." I walked purposely toward the palace. Edward and Kevis, exchanging troubled looks over my head, followed closely, unsure what to expect.
"Lady," guards bowed low as they opened the heavy, carved doors to the palace. "The master waits inside," they added, straightening up.
Zendeval Rjjn had his back turned to me when I walked in, his head bowed as if in thought. "Reah, I beg you not to be cruel," he whispered as I came to a stop ten feet away.
"How far into the past did Kifirin take you?" I asked.
"Twenty-five thousand years," he sighed. "I was fortunate that a few Greater Demons survived at that time. We have struggled to build with what we had, and it has taken that long to fashion the roughest comp-vid you could imagine. The Alliance satellites functioned very well, however, and boosted the weak signal we were able to produce. I wanted to warn you," he turned. He was weeping.
"I thank you for that," I said. "I knew they were out there, but I didn't know how badly they wanted me dead." I held up my own comp-vid, displaying his message.
"I tried to kill them when they came here. The moment those evil ones said your name, I ordered my guards to attack. We couldn't move swiftly enough and they escaped with minor injuries. I did what I could to protect you, Reah, as little as that turned out to be."
"At least your mind is your own, now." I turned away from Zendeval and glared at Perdil. "I wasn't aware that Liffelithi dwarves lived so long."
"We are nearly immortal, but the ways of our race usually ensure that our lives are
cut short—in some disagreement or other," he nodded to me. "I've learned a few things, Lady Demon, and Zen has pounded respect into my head, I think."
"Reah, please sit with me. Share tea or something. I wish to speak with you," Zendeval begged.
"Fine," I huffed a sigh.
"Reah, this is the one who attacked you," Kevis hissed.
"I know. We'll hear what he has to say."
Yidrizin, Zendeval's Prime Minister, sat with us at a beautiful table inside a small sitting room. Perdil had been sent away, grumbling.
"Reah, we don't go through moonrush any longer. There's a wine we make that prevents it," Zendeval began as soon as tea had been brought by a servant. The servant bowed respectfully and disappeared from the room.
"Too bad you didn't know about that sooner," I said.
"Yes. You were harmed. If I'd been in my right mind, it wouldn't have happened. Not like that. Every day for the past twenty-five thousand years has been torture for me, because I loved you every tick of every day, and there was nothing I could do about it." His face was filled with pain and worry. He was dressed well for all that, his hair neatly trimmed and combed back, his hands fine and the nails cared for.
"And what would you do, now that I'm here?" I asked.
"Get on my knees and beg you to be my Queen," he brushed another tear away. "I know what your answer will be, but I will hate myself more if I do not try." And right there, in front of his Prime Minister, Kevis and Edward, he knelt down, bowed his head to the floor and asked me to marry him.
"You know I have many mates already," I said. Zendeval was still huddled on the floor.
"I do not care. I am begging, Reah. I will never make you ill again. Or harm you. I will guard your life with mine. Always. That is as it should be. As it should have been before," he lifted his head, his dark eyes pleading—begging me not to reject him.
"Edward?" I turned to Edward, who sighed.
"Reah, he means it," Edward said. I nodded. I knew the truth in Zendeval's words as well.
"After this child is born, the King of Karathia expects me to marry him in a formal ceremony," I said. "And I will offer that privilege to any of my mates who have not yet taken that step. If you desire to be there and take the vows, I will not prevent it," I said, standing up. "Someone will come for you, if you do not change your mind. Here," I handed my comp-vid over. "Use this, if you wish to communicate with me between now and then. I have another comp-vid at home."
Demon's Dream (High Demon Series #6) Page 24