Luke very gently forced Faith to look him in the eye. Honey, you are the most real woman Ive ever known. Youre beautiful and smart and you care deeply for the patients who depend on you for their very lives.
But
No buts, he interrupted. The only unconventional thing about you is the circumstance of your conception. Thats it. Youre a woman, not an oddity. I know you. You have a fine heart, and a soul, and a conscience. Now would probably be a good time to tell Faith that he had fallen in love with her, somewhere between insisting that it was his clinic, not hers, and discovering that she had a deep, dark secret. He didnt.
She rose up and kissed him tenderly on the mouth. Dont let me sleep tonight.
Ill try, but you have to rest sometime.
They began to undress each other slowly, comfortably, as if they had a lifetime to do just this. If I dont sleep, I cant work on that damned formula and I cantbe different with you.
I can handle whatever happens after you go to sleep, Faith.
Can you? They fell onto the bed, and he kissed her. Deep. Long. Her legs entwined with his and their bodies aligned perfectly. Faiths hair tumbled across the sheets, dark on white. The mere sight of herperfect pale skin, that hair, those eyes, her shapely legs tangled with hiswas enough to make his heart clench.
Did I ever tell you that you have a nice ass?
Faith laughed in surprise. No.
I meant to tell you days ago. A lifetime ago. But at the time, I figured Nice ass, Dr. Martin wasnt going to win me any points.
Im not sure how to respond, Faith said, laying one hand on his own behind. No ones ever complimented my rear end before.
Thats so hard to believe. He kissed her throat, and the smile hed been wearing died. Faith affected him so much more deeply than she knew, than he was ready to admit. Luke brushed his nose across her throat and breathed deep. When I first met you, when you stormed into the clinic like a freight train and took over, I was angry and frustratedand still I kept getting distracted by your scent. I love the way you smell, Faith. Ive always loved the way you smell.
Of the five senses, the sense of smell is the most primitive, she informed him. Its
No lectures, Luke interrupted. Not tonight. He kissed her throat again, tasting her, becoming a part of her long before their bodies were joined. Just tell me. Is it perfume, scented soap, some exotic shampoo?
I told you I dont use perfume, she said softly. And I use whatever soap or shampoo is handy.
He lifted his head and stared down at her. Maybe she was right. Maybe he was drawn to her on a primal level that could not be explained. He recognized her as his, in a way that could not be defined.
She smiled widely and raked one foot over his calf. Freight train?
Yeah. He returned her easy smile. Freight train.
Faith shifted her body slightly so that it rubbed against his in interesting ways. I suppose I should be offended by that metaphor, but for some reason Im not.
There was more truth to the comparison than Luke wanted to let on. Faith hadnt just barreled into his clinic and his town, she had made an absolute wreck of his personal life, such as it was. She made him question everything; she made him want things he had given up on long ago. Things he had given up on years before Karens death.
Faiths hand drifted lazily down his side and rested on his hip, and then she threaded her fingers through his hair and pulled his mouth to hers. There was no more talk as they kissed and touched and their minds were cleared of everything but sensation and love. He still didnt say it, and neither did she, but the love was there.
After a while, Faith reached out and snagged a condom from the bedside table. Last night, when shed been without inhibition, she had insisted that he come to her without anything between them, but tonight she obviously felt differently.
I thought you wanted a baby, he said as he took the foil-wrapped protection from her.
I do, she said, kissing him again. Heaven help me, I do, more than youll ever know. But how can I even think of bringing a child into the world when I dont know who I am or what will happen next? A baby of mine would be in as much danger as I am, and you
What about me? he asked when she hesitated.
Faith laid her hand on his face, traced his jaw with a delicate finger. I shouldnt drag you into my life in any way. You shouldnt be here now. I shouldntcare about you. Anyone whos close to me is in danger, Luke. Real physical danger. My child, the father of my childthey wouldnt be safe.
Luke opened the package and sheathed himself quickly, then rolled Faith onto her back. You cant live your whole life looking over your shoulder, waiting for the bad guys to show up.
What choice do I have? she asked breathlessly.
None, he imagined. He kissed Faith again, wiping away the talk of dangers they could not see or control. She closed her eyes and held on tight, perfectly willing to be swept away by physical sensation and the tenuous emotional connection that bound them together.
He entered her slowly, and she moved against him with a gentle undulation that urged him deeper. She held on to him with her arms and her legs as he buried himself in her.
Words of caution meant nothing. He was already a part of Faiths life, and he wasnt going to undo what had been done. Not now, not ever.
Here and now, nothing mattered but her body and his. The comfort and pleasure they gave each other. The heat they generated when they touched.
As he lost himself inside her, he forgot everything else. When Faith shattered around him and whispered his name while her breath caught in her throat, Luke drove deep and found his own release. Their bodies shuddered and clung together, sweating and shaking, joined together in a way that went beyond the body. The words Luke hadnt said in so long, words hed never thought to say again, teased his brain and the tip of his tongue. I love you.
There were very real dangers in the world that had nothing to do with the Coalition.
Fourteen
L uke tried to stay awake, and so did Faith, but they were exhausted. Physically, mentally, they had been drained. They eventually drifted off to sleep.
When Luke opened his eyes, he saw Faith sitting at the small round table near the window, scribbling furiously. The lamp above the table burned bright, bathing her work space and Faith herself in harsh light. Luke didnt move, didnt jump up and try to stop her even though that was his first instinct. Hed watch, discover where she hid the notes, and then hed destroy them.
Faith was so intent on her work, she didnt know he watched. Tonightthis morningshe hadnt awakened him as she had the other two nights hed spent here. She knew it wouldnt be so easy to get rid of him tonight; she knew he wouldnt leave her alone, not now. Maybe she was hoping hed sleep through the entire episode.
She had been naked when shed fallen asleep in his arms, and she was naked now. Like a modern-day Lady Godiva, covered by nothing but her long hair, she worked mindlessly on her formula.
With the chill in the air, Faith had to be cold. Luke wanted to go to her, cover her with a blanket, protect her from the cold and the Coalition and everything else.
The demons hed tried t
o bury for the past ten months whispered in his ear. Who was he kidding? He couldnt protect Faith. He could try, but in the end hed fail, just as hed failed to save Karen. He could love Faith. Dammit, he did love her. But was that love enough? Faith was an extraordinary woman who deserved so much more than he could ever offer. Was that what had kept him from telling her how he felt? Fear that he wasnt ever going to be good enough for her?
He hadnt been enough for his wife. Shed always wanted more. More money, more prestige. Shed never been satisfied. But Faith wasnt Karen. They were nothing alike, not in appearance or personality or in the way he loved them.
Of course, there was no one quite like Faith, and there never would be.
Faith truly could destroy the world if she wanted to. She had the power in her mind to do so many things. She had chosen to do only good with her exceptional knowledge, but what if for some reason she turned her mind in another direction?
The Coalition she talked about could do a lot of damage if they got their hands on her and had her in their complete control. No wonder she was afraid.
There were moments when he was sure theyd be together forever, that he couldnt bear to let her go. She seemed to feel the same way, but was that just wishful thinking on his part and desperation on hers?
Hed always hated the very idea of leaving Rockland, but that might be the only way to save Faith. He had to get her out of town, as far away from this place as possible. Maybe then shed be safe. That was what he wanted more than anythingFaiths safety. Her happiness. She needed to somehow rediscover the peace of mind shed enjoyed before shed learned of her origins and the Coalition. Was that possible?
After an hour or so Faith finished her work, stretched her arms over her head and stood. She turned off the lamp shed worked by, which left the room dimly lit by the bathroom light. Papers in hand, she walked to the closet and reached up to the top shelf. She moved an extra pillow aside and placed her work there, where it was hidden from view. From a hanger in that same closet, she snagged a red sweater.
Did she grab the sweater because she was cold? No. She didnt pull it on, but walked to the window and placed the red garment there on the windowsill, so it could be seen from the parking lot. Obviously, this was some sort of signal. Did that mean the formula was finished?
Faith returned to bed, moving slowly. Luke closed his eyes as she crawled under the covers with him, scooting close and aligning her body to his. Yes, she was cold. Her skin was chilled, her hands icy. A slight tremble passed through her body, shoulder to thigh. Luke felt that telling shudder, wanted to hug her tight and chase all the fears and the chill away.
He didnt. If he let Faith know he was awake, the part of her that was under the influence of the Coalition would know that hed seen her work, that hed watched her hide the formula in the closet.
Faith sighed, laid her hand against his side and snuggled close. She found her place and settled in. Head against his chest, arm draped possessively around him, she whispered, I love you, Luke, before going back to sleep.
Lukes heart hammered. Faith loved him. She couldnt lie, not in her current unrestrained state. She had no reason to lie. With her life in turmoil and her own demons eating her up inside, she loved him.
Maybe he wasnt good enough, maybe he couldnt save her. But he did love her. For now that was enough. Love was all they had.
In the night, with Faith clinging to him, the last of Lukes nasty demons died.
The first thing Faith did when she opened her eyes was glance at the table by Lukes head. She sighed in relief when she saw three condoms there.
Dont worry. Lukes sleepy, deep voice drifted to her ear. You were very well behaved last night.
Was I?
He kissed her quickly, and then reached beneath his pillow. But you did finish this, he said. At least, I assume its finished. You put a red sweater on the windowsill. I figure thats a signal to whoever is going to try to retrieve the formula.
She took the papers from Lukes hand. They had burned the portion of the formula she had composed at Lukes house, but that work was repeated here. Seeing the entire formula laid out this way, page after page of detailed instructions, chilled her to the bone. The construction and release of this virus would not only be dangerous, it would be catastrophic.
This virus was much more dangerous than the one that had torn Carson County apart. As a weapon it would be virulent, deadly and quick. Drop a canister in the midst of a city on a windy day, and within days thousands would be dead. There would be not only flulike symptoms in the affected, but pustules and rashes. It was the kind of disease nightmares were made of.
The disease wouldnt just affect those who inhaled the contagion. Unlike Rockland Fever, this virus would spread from person to person with ease. What she held in her hand would be the plague of the twenty-first century if it fell into the wrong hands.
Among the pages she found that shed composed a formula for a vaccine. That elicited a harsh, ugly bark of laughter. Heaven forbid that the Coalition might become victims of their own weapon!
Would the Coalition use this formula themselves, or sell it to the highest bidder? Faith shuddered, horrified that she was capable of devising such a weapon, even in the recesses of her mind.
What will happen when someone comes here to retrieve the formula and its not where its supposed to be? she asked.
Luke shook his head. They wont like it, but we dont have any choice. The formula has to be destroyed.
She nodded briskly. But I might try to begin again, she said softly. In my sleep.
Luke took her face in his hands and looked into her eyes. If you do, Ill be right here to make sure no one ever gets their hands on it. Or on you. He let his hands fall slowly away, but he continued to stare at her. Calm, steady and solid, he was her rock.
What would she do without Luke? Where would she be? If not for him, shed have no idea that shed been working on this biological weapon. The Coalition would retrieve it. Untold numbers would die. On a more personal level, his presence and support kept her on her feet and functioning.
Faith sat up straight very quickly. I have an idea. She went to the closet for her robe first, drew it on and belted it tight. Then she grabbed paper and pen and sat at the round table by the window.
Within seconds Luke was behind her, peering over her shoulder. What are you doing?
Faith continued to scribble furiously. Im assuming that whoever delivered the trigger and is waiting for the formula to be finished is a henchman, a Coalition soldier, not a scientist.
Probably, Luke agreed.
So they wont know exactly what they have until its returned to the Coalition facilities and a physician or scientist studies what Ive written.
Youre so smart, Luke said, placing his hand on her shoulder. Faith glanced over her shoulder to find him dressed in boxers and smiling at her.
It will buy us a little time.
He nodded. What is that? he asked, glancing at the paper before her.
Soap, she said. The chemical makeup of soap. She moved down the page and began to scribble again. This is the basic makeup of the virus theyve infected this town with, with a few changes that will make it ineffective. She moved to the next page, and then the next, filling the white space with harmless instructions. On the fourth and final page, she wrote a lengthy paragraph. In Latin.
Whats that? I recognize a few of the words, but He studied them with a frown on his face while he tried to translate.
These are very anatomically specific instructions on what the bastards can do with this information, Faith answered.
When she was finished, Luke took the papers from her and placed them where hed found the real formula. Then they burned the original pages in the trash can. As she watched the pages that held the formula for a deadly virus go up in smoke, a powerful rush of relief made her light-headed.
Youll have to keep an eye on me tonight, she said, taking Lukes hand and holding on tight.
I will.
And every night until I meet with the psychologist Jake told me about and Imdeprogrammed. Jake would want to know what was happening to her, but she wasnt ready to give up these last few days with Luke. And if Jake knew her programming had been activated, there would be no keeping him away.
Im here, Faith, Luke assured her. No ones going to get their hands on you or your work while Im around.
She watched until there was nothing left of the deadly formula but a harmless pile of ash. Only then could she breathe easy.
Luke flushed the ashes, so whoever came for the formula would not be wise to the fact that paper had been burned here. Well pretend to leave and then go around back, he said as he exited the bathroom. I imagine someone will come here today to retrieve the formula. The quarantine will be lifted in a day or two. The haz-mat team is almost finished with their sweep through the county. Whoever is coming after this will want to take what they came for and get out of here as soon as they can.
Faith nodded as she grabbed an outfit from the closet. As she tossed the clothes on the bed, someone knocked frantically at the door.
Just a minute, she said. Luke did not try to hide. It would be a worthless exercise since his SUV was parked out front. He stepped into a pair of jeans as she belted her thick robe tighter and opened the door.
Family Secrets: Books 5-8 Page 88