“Connor, I had no idea,” Allana said with pity.
“You were young. Besides, it had nothing to do with you.” He looked at her seriously. “I am truly sorry I made you feel you were the reason I stayed away.”
She smiled tenderly at him. “It’s forgotten already. I’m just happy you’re finally home now.” She reached up and pulled him in for another hug.
Well, the worst is over, Connor thought, and it had gone much smoother than anticipated. He still couldn’t believe she slapped him though. At least she hadn’t punched him like she would have eight years ago.
They pulled away from their embrace and stared at each other. So much time had passed between the two that an uncomfortable silence seemed to spread between them.
“I suppose I should go unpack before dinner. Perhaps even clean up a bit,” Connor said, breaking the silence.
“Oh, there isn’t time. Father and Lilly are already waiting for me in the dining room. That is where I was heading when you entered the house so dramatically. You have to come with me. I cannot wait to see Father’s face when he sees you!” Allana said, grabbing his hand and pulling him toward the dining room.
* * *
Lord Marcus Tananguard hugged his son, freely letting silent tears fall from his eyes. It was an emotional reunion for everyone. Even Lilly shed a few tears as Connor hugged her appreciatively for all she’d done for his family. After the reunion, the four sat down to enjoy a long dinner together. The two hours around the table, though, went by in a rush as the four caught up on the years they had missed.
Lilly listened and watched her husband, Allana, and Connor talk. It was such a joyous reunion, should she share her wonderful news with them as well? She’d been debating the idea through all of dinner. Finally, she could contain it no longer. She cleared her throat nervously.
“Since this is such a happy evening,” Lilly began. “I have some news for everyone.” They all looked at her curiously. “I am with child,” she finished beaming with pride. Her husband’s face paled.
“Lilly!” Allana screeched. “Oh Lilly, how wonderful for you.” She rushed to Lilly’s side and hugged her tenderly.
“Congratulations,” Connor said smiling. He too came to her side and gave her a hug.
“Lilly, are you certain?” Marcus asked quietly. He hadn’t moved from his chair.
“Yes, Marcus, about three months certain. Even the doctor has assured me. I…I saw him yesterday because I was afraid it might be something else. I was just waiting for the right moment to tell you.” Tears entered her husband’s eyes as he looked at her.
Lilly walked toward him. “All will be well, Marcus. The doctor said I will be fine if I am careful.” She placed her hand on his shoulder, hoping to reassure him. She sensed fear in him from the prospects of losing her at childbirth like he had his first wife when bringing Allana into the world.
Marcus looked at Lilly long and hard as if knowing she needed his support more than anything right then. He wiped away his fears, grinned boyishly at her before picking her up off the floor and into his arms. “A baby. My lovely Lilly is going to finally have a baby,” he said laughing heartily. She giggled, relief flooding her body, as he swung her around in a circle.
* * *
Allana watched her father and Lilly with relief. Her father had been so pale when the news was shared. Lilly was ecstatic, and she had every right to be. They had been trying for years. Lilly just wasn’t as young as she used to be, and Allana knew that was what scared her father.
“Excuse us, you two, but I am taking my wife upstairs,” Lord Tananguard said, cradling Lilly in his arms. Lord Tananguard was a large man. He was tall with salt and pepper colored hair, and he was quite fit at the age of fifty. He was sixteen years her senior, but what was age when one was in love? And they were still very much in love. They met in London six months before Connor had left for school. Lilly was a rich American heiress who had never married because of the responsibility of taking care of her sick father. After his death, she left the plantation she’d inherited to the charge of her father’s best friend and had gone to Europe to escape her mundane life. The place she picked to visit first, and the place that would cause her to never return home, was London. There she met Marcus Tananguard and fell in love. Now, after eight years of marriage, she was finally pregnant.
Allana watched as her father carried her lovely stepmother out of the dining room, disappearing around the corner. “I hope I’m still in love with my husband when I’ve been married as long as they have,” Allana said longingly. She cared for Lucas, but couldn’t shake the feeling something was missing between the two of them. They were both strongly attracted to each other, and they were…they were…well, sometimes that seemed to be all there was.
A sick feeling entered Allana’s stomach at the thought. There had to be something else between Lucas and herself, but what? He was fun, certainly, but he was also conceited, vulgar, and inappropriate, kissing and groping her as if they were already wed. He’d given her that desired first kiss after two weeks of courtship, and it seemed every time he kissed her he taught her something new. Initially, it had been exciting and fun, but it had been a month since the first kiss and the excitement had worn off. Now it was more of a chore than fun, trying to fend him off the way she did. Yet, she continued to allow him to court her, thinking his forwardness was acceptable since they were going to be wed someday.
“You will, Pet. Marry a man who adores you like Father does Lilly, and you will,” Connor said breaking through Allana’s thoughts.
“I hope you’re right, Connor,” she said as a desperate feeling swept over her. She didn’t love Lucas. She was trying to make herself fall in love with him, but so far it hadn’t worked. Would that love ever come? A tall, dark-haired man with blue eyes entered her thoughts, and her heart quickened. She couldn’t keep thinking of him. He had to be the reason she couldn’t give her heart to Lucas. If only she could let go of him. But, since her encounter with the Earl of Westbrook four years ago, her soul wouldn’t let her. She was captivated. He was the one she really wanted, and yet she knew she would never have him.
“What is going through your mind, Allana?” Connor asked, once again breaking through her thoughts.
“Oh, nothing,” she answered, blushing slightly from her thoughts of Lord Declan Cunningham. “Shall we move to the drawing room? There is still so much to catch up on,” she said, changing the subject.
“Of course. Lead the way,” Connor replied, following her out of the room.
Allana and Connor moved to the small sitting room opposite the dining room. They sat in two cozy chairs that faced a warm fireplace. A small pianoforte sat in one corner of the room, and in the other corner, there was a round table with two hard backed chairs. Next to that sat a small cabinet where Lord Tananguard kept some glasses and sherry. Connor filled a glass with the drink and left the remainder of the bottle next to him.
The two talked late into the night, filling each other in on the years they had missed. Several times Allana wanted to ask Connor about Lord Cunningham, who was mentioned earlier in conjunction with Connor’s political and business affairs. Ever since Connor mentioned his name, he was all Allana could think about. Every part of her wanted to know more about her secret love, but she refused to bring him up. Instead she talked of Lilly and the things she’d learned from her stepmother.
“She is so wonderful, Connor. Look at what she has done with me.” Allana stood from her chair and turned for Connor. “Am I not a lady? Can you believe I turned out so well?” she asked, laughing lightly.
“I have to admit, I was quite shocked to see how lovely you’ve become, Pet. I keep thinking, who is this beautiful woman, and what has she done with my little sister? I knew you would be pretty, but you are absolutely stunning. I’m afraid I won’t be able to return to London or travel to America until you are safely married,” he said teasingly. He emptied his glass at those words and thoughts. Apparently, there was mo
re truth to his words than implied.
Allana shook her head. “Flatterer. But what is this talk of America?”
“Well,” Connor began as he filled his glass with more sherry, “over the past few years I have made some very good investments, and Lilly has that property in America. I thought perhaps she might sell to me, or at least let me manage it for her. I have always dreamed of going to the new world, and now I have the money to pay for the trip myself as well as buy some property of my own if I wanted. Of course, I think it would be more profitable for Lilly and Father if they simply let me go run hers—”
“But Connor, you just got back. How can you think of such things already?” Allana cut in.
“It’s what I want, Allana. It’s something I have been planning for some time. And it’s something I can finally do because I no longer need Father’s financial support to go.”
They looked at each other for a few moments. Allana was doing her best to form a good argument in her mind. Before she could speak, he moved on.
“It’s getting late, Pet. You should go to bed.” He watched her as he took small sips from his glass.
She looked at him, still contemplating arguing with him about going to America so soon, but gave in. She really was tired, and she didn’t feel like starting a debate she doubted she could win.
“Yes, I think I will.” She rose from her chair. “Good night, Connor. It is good to have you back.” She kissed his cheek and headed for the door. As she got there, she hesitated. “Connor, at least wait for a while before you mention anything to father about leaving. Give him some time to enjoy having you home before you bombard him with this plan.”
“I will think about it. Now go to bed. You look exhausted.”
She hesitated again.
“What is it this time?”
“Well…I was just wondering…oh, never mind,” she finished, cheeks flushing a healthy shade of red.
“No, tell me,” Connor said, face furrowing in curiosity.
“It really doesn’t matter. I will just go to bed now—”
“You cannot start something and not finish it. Tell me what you were wondering,” Connor demanded.
“Well…you see…I was wondering,” she hesitated then sighed in resignation. “What is Lord Cunningham like?” She couldn’t resist it any longer; she had to ask about him.
“Why?” he asked curiously.
“Oh, no reason. I…I was curious about him.” In reality, she wanted to know as much about him as possible. Was he anything like the man she’d created in her mind? That man was literally perfect. In all honesty, no man could compare, which was probably why she continued to think about him instead of the man she should be thinking about. Shame filled her being. She was in love with a man who did not exist.
“I think there is more to it than that. Are you fond of him?” Connor teased.
Allana doubted her brother knew just how close he was to the truth. She was fond of Lord Cunningham, more than fond of him. She couldn’t seem to free her thoughts of him, and it had grown worse each day since his wife’s death two years ago. There was a pull to him she could not explain. It was ridiculous, of course. She’d met him once, and allowed her imagination to do the rest. That had to be it, yet no matter how hard she tried, not even Lucas could break the hold her Earl unknowingly held over her. “Connor, please. He is practically old enough to be my own father,” she said, trying to sound insulted but knowing her face was scarlet.
“Not really. There is only ten—maybe eleven—years’ difference between you,” Connor replied.
“Just the same,” she began. “I was a child when he married his late wife.”
“And your point is?”
“Well, the fact that he’s been married and widowed already makes him seem so much older,” Allana said, feeling foolish for making this argument. She really didn’t feel this way at all. She was only saying these things to steer Connor from the truth. Lord Cunningham could be twice her age, and she would still dream of marrying him.
“Allana, this is ridiculous. He’s not much older than I. Besides, look at Lilly and Father,” Connor argued.
“That’s different,” Allana tried.
“How?”
“She was in her late twenties when they met. I am just eighteen,” Allana said.
“You are eighteen, nearing nineteen, which means you are practically an old maid.”
“I am not!” Allana said indignantly.
Connor ignored her outburst. “But honestly, does it really matter?”
“Well, no, but—”
“He could be fifty, and it should not matter. But I forget who I’m talking to,” Connor smirked. He went to take a drink from his glass and saw it empty. He stared at it in confusion. Then he shrugged his shoulders and filled it again.
“What is that supposed to mean?” Allana asked defensively.
“Just that you have always been…unique,” he said, taking a drink.
“Unique?” she raised her eyebrows high, making her eyes seem even bigger than they already were.
“No other young woman would care how old a man is as long as he could provide for her. Most don’t even have a choice. You, on the other hand, will get that choice because Father cannot refuse your wishes. You should already be spoken for, but I can see that is not so,” he finished, looking at her for a reply, taking another drink in the process.
“If you must know, I was proposed to once…well, almost. But even had he proposed, I would have refused—”
“See?” he pointed out.
“But I did not love him. How can you expect me to marry someone I do not love?” she asked passionately. Why were they even having this conversation?
“Like I said. You are unique. Love is not an option for most people. It is simply a luxury, an emotion that is overvalued,” Connor said, draining his glass and refilling it yet again.
“What are you saying? You don’t believe in love?” she asked in shock.
“No. I simply don’t believe it is important to make a marriage work,” came the honest reply.
“Connor, how can you be so heartless? I have to have love. I cannot and will not marry without it,” Allana said defensively. Was Connor really this dispassionate about love?
“Once again, that is why you are unique. You will get the privilege to choose when most young ladies of your age and rank will not. I am sorry, but it is true. Anyway, how did we get on this subject? Oh right. Lord Cunningham. Are you interested in him?” Connor asked flippantly.
“No, I am not interested in him. Why would I be interested in someone I have never met? I was simply curious. My friend, Carmon, told me he is quite a fine man…pleasant and agreeable. Is he? I’ve only seen him from a distance.” She was rambling, and if she wasn’t careful, she was going to give away the one secret no one except Lilly knew.
* * *
Connor smiled at his sister. There was something going on here, but his mind was becoming fuzzy from his drink. He could not discover what he was missing. He shrugged. He figured every girl fantasized about being with an earl, a duke, or a prince. Since Declan was the only one available in this area, Connor assumed most girls fantasized about him even if they hadn’t met him.
“Well, he is a very agreeable man,” he said thinking about his friend. “I mean, since his wife passed away, he has been the most sought after man in London and probably here. Women cannot seem to stay away from him,” Connor paused, catching a strange look in Allana’s eyes. Was it jealousy? “He’s back from London now, you know.”
“Yes, I heard,” she said, sounding almost embarrassed.
The strange look in her eyes changed to something else entirely. He could have sworn it was a look of worship, but it had been so long since he’d seen any look on her face he could not tell for certain. He drained his glass yet again and refilled it for the fourth time that night…or was it the fifth? It could have even been the sixth. It had been a long time since he’d been drunk, and being
home made him feel the need to get very drunk.
“Haven’t you had enough to drink, Connor? The bottle is almost empty,” Allana said with concern as she noticed him filling his glass again.
“It wasn’t even half full when I started. Besides, it’s not for you to worry about. Stop trying to change the subject. We were talking about Cunningham, not how much I’ve had to drink.” He cleared his throat, pausing for a moment. Was he sounding slurred? “If you are interested, I could introduce you to him, and then you could judge for yourself whether he’s handsome or charming. I could always invite him to dinner one of these—”
“No!” Allana yelped. “I mean, no.” She laughed nervously. “That won’t be necessary. I was just curious,” she said.
Interesting, Connor thought. Why was she panicking over meeting Declan? “It wouldn’t be a problem. I could go over there tomorrow and have him here by dinner.”
“No! It’s fine, really. I don’t want to meet him. As I said before, I was simply curious. Good night, Connor,” she said briskly, turning quickly and leaving before Connor could press her further about it.
“That was odd,” Connor said aloud, pouring the rest of the bottle into his glass. If he didn’t know better, he would think she fancied Declan. But then he remembered something very disturbing. Lucas. Lucas had been mentioned earlier in conjunction with Allana. Was he courting her? Immediately, Declan was wiped from Connor’s mind as he thought of Lucas Hoffman pursuing Allana. Connor gulped his glass down with the thought, then found another bottle and started drinking straight from it.
Lucas had been Connor’s closest friend for years. And Connor knew far too much about Lucas. He was not the kind of man Connor wanted his sister with. In London, Lucas had gone from woman to woman, satisfying his lustful desires, neither loving nor caring about any of them. Once he won one over and disrespected her, Lucas would throw her aside and go in search of his next victim, and now Connor feared Lucas was after Allana.
The Lady and the Earl Page 5