Her eyes final y slipped closed again and she felt…nothing.
No hands, no press of his rippled body, no heat from his hunger. But Rhys’ was there, his deep voice sounding in her head, encouraging her to let go and sleep.
She sank further into the void, knowing she was losing her side of the war, but not caring one little bit. It wasn’t until she was nearly asleep, completely relaxed, and unavoidably open to him that he struck. The attack, however, was meticulously thought out and strategized. And al the more lethal for it.
He eased himself into her mind slowly so he didn’t jar her awake. He held her in her dreamless state, the sensations of his primal cravings chaining her under. With his delicious promises of fulfil ment, he drew on her urges and pinned them out to bear, bringing her to the brink without so much as a touch.
It was then she felt the first contact; cal oused fingertips whispering across her abdomen and up her ribs. Arching into his touch, her breath caught and held with expectancy.
But he countered her movement with one of his own, refusing to deliver as he snaked his hand back.
Addison groaned in frustration when she suddenly felt a moist heat latch onto the tender skin at the base of her neck. Leaning her head to the side, she gave him better access. Gentle nips fol owed by the scrap of his teeth had her reaching for him.
Where was he?
Her wrists were captured by a strong grip and held to the side as the assault on her neck continued. She squirmed where she lay, eager for so much more now that it had begun. His responding low chuckle told her volumes; he was wel aware of her predicament, and was going to exploit it in every way he could.
With a quick tug, Addison’s arms were yanked above her head. Rhys’ hard, contoured body pushed against her side.
His palms slid up her ribs to rest at the base of her breast, fingers curling around. He descended on her painful y tight nipple, a quick squeeze and a little pump preparing her for the wet heat of his mouth, the soft rasp of his teeth.
He stroked her skin, warming the blood beneath until it reached a combustible heat. And then his greedy tongue ignited it, a flash fire through her body powering her into a mindless frenzy as it slicked across the hardened peak of her breast.
His hands roamed, tugged, twisted and teased. Al the sensations were sharp and ruthless, but happened in such rapid succession it was impossible to know what she felt where.
No…she felt Rhys. Everywhere.
This was what she needed. This was what she craved. It was just as intense as their last time together, and yet, it was so much more.
It took her a passion-ladened minute to realize the difference; there were no images this time, only sensation.
It made it more intimate—more emotional—to only feel. As if they were two long-time lovers rediscovering each other in the darkness and familiarity of their own bedroom. This felt right. As if it was meant to be, and had always been.
Rhys final y rol ed into the cradle of her thighs and she shifted to draw him near. She felt his hard length press against her, gasped as he nudged inside, and cried out as he plunged into her wet warmth.
He thrust. She surged. And they found a pounding tempo to please them both, a rhythm that possessed until there was nothing but the climb of sensation.
Wrapping herself around his tight body, she could hear Rhys heavy pants in her ear—or were those hers?—as they strained towards release. They were two hearts, two souls entwining, inextricable. Linked. Bonded. Connected.
As one.
The orgasm roared in her head from their combined release, pulses slamming and bodies seizing. And when the quivering ceased and her blood final y slowed, the ensuing silence was so consuming, she half-thought she’d gone deaf from the experience.
Holy shit. Rhys’ hoarse voice was barely discernable.
“Holy? That was downright spiritual.” She puffed out a weak laugh. “No pun intended.” Rhys moaned as he rol ed his weight off her slender frame. Come here, baby, he murmured, gathering her in his strong arms.
The quiet growl in his words—like he stil wanted her, couldn’t get enough of her—scraped away a layer of bliss to reveal how fiercely she truly loved this man. And just how little time they had left together.
Addison snuggled in. A quiet desperation had her gripping his shoulders and weaving her legs around his.
She wasn’t letting go.
I gotcha. I’m not going anywhere.
Not yet he wasn’t, but his time would come. She knew it. He knew it. And there was nothing either one of them could do about it.
An overwhelming sentiment drifted through her disjointed thoughts. And without regard to the consequences, those irrevocable words slipped uncensored through her mind. I love you, Rhys.
Realization and panic speared through her during the split-second it took him to respond.
With a squeeze and a nuzzle, he whispered, I love you too, Addison. God help me, I do.
Chapter Seventeen
Addison stretched lazily, like a cat working out the kinks after a long nap.
“Is your brother typical y late?” she asked Rhys, rol ing on her back and letting her head hang off the end of the bed.
She felt as if she’d wasted the whole morning waiting on him.
Actually, he is. The man could never manage time.
“Real y?”
Probably the only reason he was at the gate to pick you up was because your plane was running late. Otherwise, you would’ve been waiting on his ass. Guaranteed.
“Doesn’t that drive you nuts?”
She felt his mental shrug. Been like that all my life. It’s to where I convert everything into X-time—Xavier time. If we’re launching our set at 10:00, we tell him 9:00 so he’s raring to go.
“Isn’t he onto your little antics by now?” Sure, he is. But it works, so he goes with it. Hell, we’d never start on time otherwise.
Addison glanced at the clock. She flipped to the side into a solid landing and strode towards the sitting area. “So, if we’re going by X-time, he should be here any minute then.” Hmm. Too bad, too. I was about ready to come up with some ideas to help you pass the time.
A delicious tingle coursed through her veins. “I know. Why do you think I started talking about your brother? If anything can shut a man down, it’s the thought of another man.” And why would you want to do that? , he asked smugly. You can’t tell me you didn’t enjoy last night, that you don’t crave more. I felt you, Addison. I felt all of you. And you loved every minute of it.
She swal owed hard as she sat onto the somewhat-stiff couch. “Ahhh…I think that’s a given at this point. But tel me, Rhys, why would you want to get me al hot right before another man shows up at my room?”
Good point. She could hear the frown in his voice as he muttered, No. Don’t want that at all.
Brother or not.
Smiling, she squirmed where she sat, squeezing her thighs together and letting him feel the sensation. “But now that you mention it…”
Oh, hell no, woman! You will not get me all tuned up and then freeze me off.
“But the payback was so much fun.” She laughed.
Shit. You’re going to be the death of me.
The comeback wiped the smile off Addison’s face. Such a common everyday saying, and yet it had such a different twist to it now.
Addison.
She pul ed herself from the guilt of her dark thoughts; thoughts she had blocked from Rhys.
With a great deal of effort, she tried to project some levity back into her mood. “Yeah?” Talk to me, baby. What’re thinking?
She stared down at her hands as she snapped her fingernails together. “I…don’t think I can say.” She blinked back tears of shame as she whispered, “Oh, God. I’m a terrible person.” I don’t buy that shit for one second. Now, what is it?
She owed him honesty, above al else. She knew that, but didn’t like it. “We’re here to help you get closure, to help you move on.”
>
Yeeeah.
“Rhys… Jesus. I’l do what I can. You know I wil .” Of course you will.
“And I care about you. I…”
You…? he prompted.
The words she fumbled for final y broke free in a mad rush of sound. “I love you. And I want you to be happy. You should be happy. You should get everything you could possibly want. Dammit! And I want that for you. You’re a good man. A beautiful man. A solid and caring man. Who am I to—” She snapped her mouth closed, horrified she’d already said too much.
But she hadn’t actual y admitted to anything yet, had she?
Coward.
“Rhys. I’m sorry. I can’t help how I feel. But I’l do everything in my power to get you what you want.”
Addi, you’re not making any—
“I don’t want this to work,” she blurted out. “I don’t want to lose you.” The tears streamed down her burning cheeks.
“God! I’m total y selfish. I’m sorry, Rhys! I can’t help… But I’l do what I can. I wil . I’l …” Her sobs choked out everything else into an unintel igible mess.
Shh… he soothed in a deep whisper. Close your eyes, baby. Come back to me.
She knew she shouldn’t indulge, that it was even more self-serving after what she had just admitted, but she closed her eyes anyway.
His strong arms wrapped around her at once, his face nuzzling in her hair, his hot breath sounding in her ear. Don’t cry, baby. I can’t stand that you hurt. And I know what you mean. I want to stay with you, but…I don’t think I can.
“I know. I understand,” she said, pul ing back from his strength, embarrassed for acting so ridiculous.
She was a grown woman who was strong enough to do the right thing, and to keep her damn mouth shut about it no matter what she was feeling. Of course he can’t stay. And why would she be such an idiot to think otherwise? To think he’d want the same? To think it would even work?!
Just as she was about to open her eyes and break the connection, he tightened his grip, tugging her close. No.
You don’t understand. I love you, too. I do. Hell, you know I do. And I would stay if I could. I want nothing more at this moment than to spend the rest of my…whatever this is—
existence…with you. Loving you. Touching you. His large hands caressed down her back.
Having you.
Clutching his broad shoulders, she bit off a gasp as his hands came to rest on the swel of her ass. “But it’s not fair to you.”
It’s not fair to either one of us, sweetheart. But, the point is, I don’t think I can. Thing is…I’m slipping. I have been a little more every day.
She stiffened in his arms. “What does that mean? Are you okay?” I’m good. It’s just… I used to only feel a pull to you.
Like I was anchored inside you, bolted deep. Now I’m feeling another pull, and it’s growing stronger than yours.
“Is it… Are you…”
She knew if there was Heaven and Hel , Rhys was definitely on the ascension list. But was there something else out there? Something bad? Something that could trap and hold?
He must have sensed her question, even if she didn’t know how to articulate it. Whatever it is, it’s good. It’s right. And I know the day is coming…soon…where that pull is going to be overwhelming. When that time comes, I don’t know if I can resist.
She sighed in resignation. “You probably shouldn’t.” But I want to. He planted a tender kiss on her temple. I want to stay with you.
“Don’t. Not for me. It’s the natural order of things, Rhys.
Who knows what wil happen if you resist. You can’t. The alternative… It’s not worth the risk to find out. Not when it’s your spirit at stake.”
She felt his nod against the side of her head, and felt his sorrow in the depths of her soul.
I’m going to miss you, Addison. So much.
The knock at her hotel room door had her eyes snapping open, Rhys’ consuming warmth fading from the surface of her flushed skin. “I’l miss you too, Rhys. But it’s time to do this.” She squared off her shoulders and straightened her spine. “Let’s get your closure.”
Chapter Eighteen
“Man. Sorry I’m late,” Xavier said, pushing his big body through the gap in the door before Addison barely had it open.
She quickly scrambled aside as he passed in the narrow entryway, gesturing at him as if to say ‘Come on in.’
He total y missed the sarcastic response.
“I was working on some stuff, and traffic was a bitch. Big accident on—” His brow creased when he final y zeroed in on her. “Hey. What’s up with you?” Her back braced as his tone, then something occurred to her. Her nose felt a little runny yet from crying, but a quick sniffle and a discreet swipe of her hand assured her. Nope. She was good. “I’m fine, thank you.”
He waved a pointing finger from one eye to the other.
“What’s going on there?” She fisted a hand on her hip. “Just what does it look like, Xavier?”
“It looks like…” He jerked back a step, a petrified expression flashing across his face. “Are you crying?!” Rhys snickered in her head. Oh, yeah. One thing about X…he handles crying women even worse than I do.
Addison snickered. Xavier continued looking at her as if Addison snickered. Xavier continued looking at her as if she were a ten-foot mass murderer wielding a chainsaw.
Actual y, he might have handled that better.
He glanced around—seeking a distraction?—and then tipped his head towards the couch.
“I’m gonna—” He never finished the sentence; just strode to the couch and flopped down like his longs legs simply couldn’t hold his weight anymore.
Ouch!
Knowing how hard the couch was, that had to have hurt his ass. And then, sure enough, he listed to the side with a grimace on his face, before shifting from one cheek to the other.
To think, al this over a woman having bloodshot eyes. She wasn’t even crying anymore!
Addison walked over and sat next to him on the couch. She nodded at his butt. “You okay there?”
“Course.” He leaned forward, elbows on his knees as they twitched back and forth.
What a Nancy, Rhys said with a chuckle.
“You can chil out, Xavier. I’m not crying anymore.” She laid a gentle hand on his shoulder.
He jumped at her touch, voice slightly squeaky. “Who said anything about crying?” His gaze shifted to her face, then away.
“Rhys said you’re freaking out because I’d been crying.”
“Am not.” He threw a meant-to-be-casual shrug in her direction, but it looked more like he’d just had a seizure.
“It’s cool.”
She snorted, shaking her head.
Ask him about Gavin. Maybe that’ll help him find his balls again.
“Rhys!” she exclaimed, clamping a hand over her mouth as if she had said the offending words, not him.
Xavier looked at her with curiosity.
What? Rhys said innocently. The man either needs to grow a pair, or find the ones retreating into the recesses of this body. Drop ‘em, Xavier! Drop ‘em!
Xavier’s eyes narrowed. “He’s making some comment about my bal s, isn’t he?” She dropped her hand in surprise. He heard him somehow? “How’d you know?” He shrugged again, this one more natural, and then smirked.
“I’d do the same thing to him if the shoe was on the other foot.” Blowing out a breath, he leaned back and stared at the ceiling.
“Damn women and their crying,” he mumbled.
Rhys laughed.
With a rol of her eyes, Addison angled her body towards Xavier and folded her legs under her. “Rhys wants to know how it went with Gavin.”
Xavier groaned and closed his eyes. “Not wel .” What happened?
“What happened?” Addison relayed, then added, “He won’t help you?”
“No. He’l help. But he was shocked as shit that I cal ed him.
Hel , Rhys. We just had your memorial and already I’m trying to find a replacement for you. He must think I’m some kind of motherfucker.”
“He said that?” she said, clearly shocked. And this was a friend of theirs?!
“No. I said that’s what he probably was thinking.” Gavin would never go there. He knows how close we are. If he’s asking for a replacement, temporary or not, then he knows there’s a damn good reason behind it.
“Rhys disagrees. He said Gavin would know there’s a good reason behind it.” I said… damn good reason, he clarified.
“Yeah, yeah,” she mumbled at Rhys, and then leaned into Xavier. “So he got a name for you?”
“Several. I’l start making the cal s after I talk to the rest of the guys next week.” Addison arched a brow.
Xavier responded to her unspoken question. “The other guys in the band. It’s not just my decision, Rhys. It’s theirs too.”
They’re not gonna stand in his way. X is the only one who could make the call to move forward or not. They’ll follow his lead.
“Rhys says that shouldn’t be a problem.”
Xavier nodded. “He’s probably right.”
Addison felt Rhys’ concern, although he didn’t actual y say anything. “How are the other members holding up? I can tel Rhys is worried about them too.”
“They’re good. I think. They were the last time I talked to them.” Ask him how Gavin is doing. And Kiki.
“Kiki?” she said, a touch of disbelief in her tone. Someone actual y named their kid that?
It’s a nickname, Rhys explained, just as Xavier answered her.
“He wants to know how Kiki is?”
“Yeah,” she said, “and Gavin too.”
“They’re okay. Gavin’s holding up better than…wel , me.
And Kiki…” He scrubbed his face with his hands. “What can I say? Kyleigh is Kyleigh, tough as ever. She’s stil in Europe so she couldn’t make the memorial. Something about her apartment got broken into and they swiped her passport.” He lifted a shoulder. “I swear, trouble fol ows that girl.” Yeah it does.
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