Arden removes her gaze from Juniper and shifts it to Braxton. She rolls her eyes and laughs. “I’m sure they like us equally.”
Well, if that isn’t an opening, he doesn’t know what is. He takes it without hesitation. “So, what’s your story, Arden? Where do you come from? Have you always known you were illusié?”
“Whoa,” Arden says as she puts both hands up. “Slow down there, tiger.”
He blushes a deep shade of crimson. “My apologies. Too much at once?”
Much to his delight, she laughs. “Just a little. Let’s see, where do I start?”
“How about you start with where you come from?” Braxton prods.
Without warning, her tone shifts as a sort of darkness veils her expression. “Okay. I wish I could answer where I come from, but, in all honesty, I really don’t know. Mother, father, sister, brother . . . I haven’t a clue.”
He swallows, immediate feeling like an inconsiderate jerk for asking such a personal question. Strike one.
But, much to his surprise, Arden keeps talking. “I grew up at Trendalath castle as an assassin, under your father’s”—she pauses, realizing she’s about to make a grave mistake—“I mean, King Tymond’s reign. I was trained at a young age to be a part of the Cruex.”
Braxton bobs his head up and down. Ah yes, the Cruex. Formidable and daring. At least that’s what Tymond wants his enemies to think. As a child, he’d gotten to know a few of the older Cruex members, but he’d never seen Arden.
She must have been pent up on the other side of the castle.
He snaps back to attention as she continues. “As far as where I come from, I think Trendalath, but I’m not entirely certain.”
“I was born in Trendalath,” he chimes in. “At least, that’s what I was told. Who knows if it’s actually true.”
Arden gives him a sad smile, then shakes her head. “And to answer your last question, no, I haven’t always known I was illusié.” She says the last word as if it’s completely foreign on her tongue. “But, if I’m being honest, I’m quite pleased that I am.”
Braxton raises an eyebrow, intrigued. “And why is that?”
Arden looks behind her at the many rows of dwellings. “Because now, I have a family.”
Braxton nods his again, fully understanding what it feels like to not belong. To struggle with unfamiliar identity. To feel alone. It’s something he’s wrestled with his entire life, and it seems as though Arden has had a similar set of challenges. He looks at her, feeling their connection growing stronger by the minute.
“What about you?”
The question catches him completely off-guard. He’s done so well hiding his identity and avoiding these types of conversations that he’d never prepared for the day if and when it ever actually arrived. But here it is, staring him in the face, begging him to let it all out. “Life as a young price wasn’t as easy as most would think.”
“I’m sure it was a lot easier than being a peasant,” Arden scoffs.
“Excuse me,” Braxton says, “but you lived in the same castle. You were fed the same food. I’d hardly call that being a peasant.”
“Without freedom, I may as well have been a peasant,” she says under her breath.
Braxton regards her with a concerned expression. “I suppose you have no plans to return to the Cruex?”
Arden shakes her head. “That is correct. I am done with the Cruex. Done with Tymond.” She scratches Juniper behind the ears. “Plus being a member of the Caldari sounds pretty awesome.”
Braxton nods his head in agreement. “Indeed.”
“I’m sorry, I interrupted you. What happened after you decided life as a prince was too tiresome?”
He knows she’s joking, but still rolls his eyes. “I ran away when I was ten.”
The jovial expression on her face is quickly replaced with a troubled one. “Ten years old? How did you survive? Where did you go?”
Braxton sighs as he recalls the memory. “I’d saved up my coins from our travels to various towns. Made my way through the cities until I stowed on a boat to Athia. I stopped at the first place of business I could find and asked for a job.” He can’t help but shudder as Hanslow’s cries resurface. “I stayed there and never looked back.”
Arden is quiet for a few moments. “Wow. That is incredibly—”
“—stupid?” he finishes.
“I was going to say brave.” A pink tint creeps across her cheeks. “I actually admire you for it.”
Braxton can feel his chest loosen. “Well, thank you. If I’m being honest, your response was completely unexpected.”
“That’s me,” she says with a shrug, “always full of surprises.”
He can’t be certain, but by the way she blushes and looks away, he can tell that they both feel something. A deeper connection on a deeper level. Something elusive, but real.
“So, what’s your ability?”
“Well, I have lots—”
Arden laughs. “I meant your illusié ability.”
“Oh, right,” he says, trying not to feel too embarrassed. “Xerin calls me a Deviator.”
She eyes him curiously. “A Deviator? What’s that?”
Braxton gives her a cockeyed grin. “Allow me to show you.”
ARDEN ELIRI
I DON’T DARE take my eyes off of Braxton. Being a Deviator, whatever that is, has caught my attention and I find it incredibly intriguing—more intriguing than my healing abilities, anyway.
Braxton stands up from the mushroom we’re both sitting on and gestures for me to do the same. I place Juniper next to me and push myself up onto my feet. Braxton walks a few paces away, then turns to face me. I start to follow, but he raises his hand in the air to stop me, so I just stand there, feeling awkward and a little on edge.
“Do you have your weapons with you?” he asks.
I look at him with surprise. “How did you know?”
“You’re an assassin. Isn’t it a cardinal rule to carry your weapons with you at all times?”
A coy smile tugs at my lips. “Touché, Prince. Touché.”
At this, he shifts his stance. “It’s Braxton.”
“Understood. Sorry,” I say quickly. That was supposed to be a joke.
“Don’t worry about it.” His ice blue eyes lock on mine. They’re breathtaking. “Are you sure you’re ready to see this?”
I keep my gaze hard on his. “You seem to have forgotten who you’re talking to.”
His eyes crinkle as he grins. “All right then. Pull out your weapons.”
I do as he says, releasing the chakrams from their holsters. They feel good in my hands. I realize it’s been a while since I’ve held them—a few weeks at the very least. My fingers slide along the smooth arc of the blades. “Next?”
Braxton nods. “Now I want you to attack me.”
I’m immediately brought back to when Felix had ordered me to do the exact same thing. A cross between a laugh and a gasp escapes me. “Did you and Felix plan this or something?”
Braxton tilts his head, clearly confused.
“Never mind,” I say. “Okay, if you’re sure.”
Braxton’s voice is flat. “I am.”
I take a step back, my chakrams at the ready. With a grunt, I release them, feeling a part of me leave as I let go. I watch as they swiftly glide through the air, turning effortlessly in a clockwise motion right toward Braxton’s head. My eyes widen as the weapons inch closer and closer and it dawns on me that I may have just made a horrible mistake.
Why isn’t he doing anything? Why is he just standing there?
Just as I’m about to yell for Braxton to duck, something incomprehensible happens. Midflight, the chakrams come to a dead halt just inches from his face. In the middle of the air.
Fully suspended.
A wave of both awe and relief washes over me simultaneously. I watch, dumbfounded, as the chakrams rotate in midair so that the handles
are facing Braxton and the blades are now facing me. I gulp as I realize what his ability is—what Deviator actually means.
He can return attacks back on the attacker.
There’s no time to process what’s happening—the chakrams are headed in my direction, straight for my skull. I squeeze my eyes shut and cringe, waiting for whatever painful end I’m about to meet, but after a few seconds, I’m still standing. I haven’t fallen. I haven’t been struck.
I open one eye, then the other. The chakrams are motionless, floating right in front of my face. I loose the breath I’d been holding in, the metal on the blades fogging up from the warmth.
Unbelievable.
My gaze shifts from the motionless objects in front of me to Braxton. I can tell he’s focusing to keep the blades suspended. I snap my fingers, which distracts him, and the weapons drop at my feet.
“Deviator, huh?”
Braxton gives a timid smile. It’s almost unsettling.
“I have to admit, that’s a pretty impressive skill. But,” I say as I walk closer to him, “you have to let them keep going.”
Braxton stares at me with an alarmed expression. “Excuse me?”
“The chakrams. You should have let them slice me up.” There’s no inflection in my voice, and I can tell he thinks there’s something seriously wrong with me.
Little does he know, he’s right. But I won’t give it away this easily.
“I’m a Healer,” I clarify. “I can heal myself and others . . . I think.”
Braxton storms over to me and grabs my wrist. “Don’t ever say that someone should continue to attack you. Not illusié. Not Caldari. No one.”
I roll my eyes. “Don’t get your trousers in a twist,” I say as I break free from his grip. “Maybe you didn’t hear me before, but I’m a Healer, meaning I can heal people.”
“You don’t know how powerful you are,” he mutters under his breath.
“Oh, and you do?”
His face falls as he says, “I know that my father’s called in his Savant to find you.”
That shuts me up right then and there.
Estelle calls a meeting in the lower south quadrant of Orihia. Xerin isn’t here yet, so Felix, Estelle, Braxton and I stand in a semi-circle staring somewhat uncomfortably at each other. It’s obvious that Braxton and I are the newest members to the Caldari, which means that our training will be the most rigorous. If I have to guess, Felix and Xerin will most likely use this time to refine their skills, which means Estelle will be our full-time teacher.
I’m perfectly okay with that.
I gaze around at the scenery before me. Trees with multicolored leaves—shades of purple, pink, and yellow—tower over us. Small houses are built into some of the trees, and it makes me wonder if other creatures occupy them, or if the Caldari just use them as a means to escape when they feel like getting away.
My thoughts scatter as Estelle claps her hands. “Okay, time to get started, even though Xerin’s not here.”
By her tone, I can tell she’s upset with him. “What will we be doing today?” I ask, eager to get started. Juniper nips at my heels. She seems to be just as impatient as I am.
“You probably won’t want to hear this, but we need to take baby steps. We can’t release you into the world until we assess how powerful you truly are and understand what exactly you’re capable of.” She looks at Felix as if she’s holding something back, then turns her attention back to Braxton and me. “So, we’re going to start small, in a safe environment. Arden, I’m going to work with you today. We’re going to have you heal any injured animals we may come across in Orihia. Braxton will be working with Felix.” She turns her gaze to him. “Felix is going to send some seemingly harmless attacks your way. As you both master the easier tasks, we’ll move into more difficult territory. Understood?”
I pout, knowing full well that my disappointment is written all over my face. Braxton gives me a quick nod, then jogs over to Felix. I watch as they disappear behind the brush. When I turn around, Estelle is standing right in front of me.
“You don’t seem to be too happy after hearing your assignment for today.”
That’s an understatement, but I’m not going to tell her outright. Instead I just shrug and say, “We both know I can heal myself. You saw it when you first met me. I guess I just don’t understand why I have to start at the very beginning—you know, with animals.”
Estelle cocks an eyebrow. “Well, for starters, Juniper is hurt.”
“What?” I give her a bewildered look. “No, she isn’t.”
Estelle points to the little fox. “On her stomach. See for yourself.”
I crouch down to Juniper’s level and gently roll her onto her back. She resists at first, but succumbs on the second try. There, along her stomach, is a vertical gash about an inch long. The blood has already started to cake in her fur, which is a good sign because it means it’s healing, but I’m now worried that it could get infected. How did I not see this? My bottom lip starts to quiver as I place my hands on her belly. I’ve come to love this little fox, and I feel like a terrible fur-parent for not watching her more closely.
“Don’t get upset,” Estelle whispers from behind me. “Just breathe. And focus.”
I press down a little harder, trying to be as gentle as possible. Juniper whimpers a little, and I swear I can feel my heart splintering in my chest. I take a deep inhale, trying to ignore the sounds she’s making, and silently scold myself for not realizing she was hurt earlier.
What kind of person doesn’t notice something like that?
I try to clear my mind, but it’s no use. My guilt is piling up. Juniper will just be another dead body to add to the collection—yet another living thing I’ve killed. I remove my hands from her stomach and turn to look over my shoulder at Estelle. “I can’t,” I whisper.
She looks at me with grave concern. “Yes,” she says as she moves next to me and places my hands back on Juniper, “you can.”
There’s a sort of comfort having her sit next to me and, slowly, I can feel my mind start to clear. It’s not my fault. None of this is my fault. You weren’t born this way; you were made this way. As I continue to repeat this in my head, my earlier feelings of guilt begin to dissipate. I notice I’m able to take normal, even breaths again, and Estelle seems to sense this as well because she removes her hands from mine.
“Focus,” she whispers.
I do as she says. I close my eyes and search for the good within me. I have to go deeper than I remember, but I know it’s there, somewhere. It feels like an eternity before I finally find it and grab onto it, but when I do, the results are instantaneous. My eyes shoot open and there are my hands, glowing in a soft white light. Just beneath that, I can see the color of Juniper’s fur return to white. The scar stitches up on its own, the skin meeting in the middle as if nothing had happened. I continue to focus on the good, on the healing, and in just a few minutes time, the wound is nonexistent.
I let out a breath and lower my hands, the white light fading with the movement. “There.”
Estelle pats me on the back. “Nicely done. Come on, let’s move to the next assignment.”
Next assignment? I’d forgotten how drained using my healing abilities makes me feel. Estelle pops up from the ground, but I remain seated.
“Are you coming?”
I put two fingers up in the air. “Just a couple of minutes.”
“Are you tired already?”
I try not to meet her gaze because I know she’ll see the exhaustion in my eyes. “Just trying to recoup a little. I didn’t sleep well last night.”
Estelle sits down next to me and tilts my chin up, forcing me to look at her. “Well, I’ll be damned. Healing such a small creature has drained you almost completely. Why didn’t you say so?”
I stay quiet as she tries to pull me to my feet, but my body acts as though it’s an anchor. “Yo
u could at least try to make an effort,” she says with a final tug.
I do as she says and, after expelling an enormous amount of energy, I’m somehow on my feet.
“Here,” Estelle says as she pulls some grains and nuts from her pocket, “eat these. You’ll feel better.”
She transfers the food into my palm. I stare at it for a few seconds, not recognizing any of the grains or nuts, but dump the lot into my mouth anyway. They’re surprisingly delicious and full of flavor. I reach for my canteen and guzzle some water. “Do you have any more?” I’m amazed at how much better I feel.
Estelle gives me a playful nudge. “What you just ate has some of the strongest healing properties in the world. You’re strong physically, but weak mentally and emotionally.” She senses I’m offended, then quickly adds, “It’s normal when you’re first starting your training. We all have strengths and weaknesses. At least now I know what yours are. We’ll put you on a proper diet and take more time to train your mind and emotions. That way, you’ll be strong in all aspects.”
I don’t dare argue with her, so I keep my mouth shut.
“Now it’s time for something a little more challenging.” She turns away from me and begins to walk deeper into the forest, in the same direction both Felix and Braxton had wandered off to earlier.
“Where are we going?” I ask as I fight off the many rogue branches in my path.
“You’ll see.”
We walk for about five minutes when Estelle comes to a halt—it’s so sudden and unexpected that I almost bump right into her. I peer around her to see why we’ve stopped. My heart flutters as my eyes land on a fawn. Its little ears perk up and twitch as we move closer.
I expect it to run away, but I quickly realize that it’s stretched out on its side. It doesn’t move, and as I draw even closer, I can see that the coloring of its fur is off. Instead of a rich beige and taupe, the color is a dull shade of yellow.
Estelle stands beside me as I kneel to take a closer look.
“Is it sick?”
Shadow Crown Page 21