by Douglas, Michelle; Gordon, Lucy; Pembroke, Sophie; Hardy, Kate
Thea blinked. ‘What?’
‘Tell me honestly. If it hadn’t been for Helena would you have come with me when I asked, that night of your birthday party?’
The colour faded from Thea’s cheeks and he knew the answer before she even spoke the word.
‘No.’
Zeke tightened his muscles against the pain, stiffening into strength and resolve. With a sharp nod, he said, ‘That’s what I thought.’
‘I just... I wanted...’
‘You don’t need to justify yourself to me.’ A strange calm had settled over him now. At last he knew, and to his surprise the truth made all the difference. ‘I understand.’
‘No! You don’t,’ Thea said, but Zeke just shook his head.
‘Sure I do. You want a safe and predictable life, even if it makes you miserable.’ How had he thought for so many years that Thea was different from the rest of them? He should have known that they were all the same at heart. More concerned with the appearance of the thing than the substance. Better that he realised that now, however belatedly, than go on believing she was something more than she was.
‘That’s not... It’s not just that,’ Thea said unconvincingly.
‘Yeah, Thea, it is. Deny it all you want, but I know what’s going on here. You’re doing exactly what Daddy wants, as usual. You’re going to marry Flynn to buy yourself the place you think you deserve.’
She looked away, but Zeke wasn’t looking for shame in her expression. It was too late for that now, anyway. She’d made her choice and he knew his future now. But that didn’t mean he couldn’t open her eyes to a few home truths before he left.
‘You realise you could be pregnant with my child already?’ They hadn’t used protection last night. Had been too caught up in the moment even to think of it.
‘I know.’
‘Does Flynn?’
‘Yes.’ A whisper...barely even a word.
‘And he’s happy to marry you anyway?’ Of course he was. In fact he probably hoped that she was. ‘Because that would give him the one thing he’s never had, wouldn’t it? Legitimacy. Raising a true Ashton blood heir with the Morrison heiress. Perfect.’
Thea sprang to her feet to defend her fiancé. ‘You don’t have a clue what you’re talking about! And anyway Flynn is the Ashton heir, remember? You gave it all up to run away and seek revenge.’
‘Because my father chose him over me!’ Zeke couldn’t keep the anger from his voice this time. However far he moved past the pain, the sting of unfairness still caught him unawares sometimes.
‘Your father made a business choice, not a personal one.’
Zeke flinched at her words. ‘You’re wrong there,’ he said.
‘Am I?’
He knew she was, but couldn’t bring himself to explain, to argue. To revisit in glorious Technicolor the night he’d left. The things he’d heard his father say. What had really driven him away. Why he’d had to go even when Thea wouldn’t leave with him. Why her rejection had been just one more slam to the heart.
What was wrong with him? He’d moved past this years ago. Wasn’t that one of the reasons he’d come back in the first place? To prove that he’d moved on, that he had his own life now, that he didn’t need his family or the business? So why was he letting her arguments get to him?
Was it the idea of a possible baby? The thought that his child might be brought up in the Morrison-Ashton clan, living its whole life waiting to see if it would be deemed worthy enough to inherit everything that Zeke had walked away from...? It made him sick to his stomach. No child—no person—deserved to go through that. But what were the honest chances that Thea was pregnant? Slim, he’d imagine. And she’d tell him, he knew. Thea might not be everything he’d thought she was, but she was honest. She’d told Flynn about sleeping with him, hadn’t she? She’d tell Zeke if he were a father.
And then he’d be tied into this accursed family for ever. Perfect.
What had he been thinking, sleeping with her last night? Zeke wanted to beat himself up for it, except he knew exactly what he’d been thinking—that he might be able to save Thea from herself this time.
But Thea didn’t want to be saved. She’d rejected him again, and this time it cut even deeper. She’d chosen Flynn. She wanted Flynn.
Fine. She could have him. But Zeke was making sure she knew exactly what she was letting herself in for first.
CHAPTER TWELVE
THEA THOUGHT SHE could bear anything except sitting one moment longer under Zeke’s too knowing gaze. Who was he to judge her, to condemn her? To think he knew her better than she knew herself?
Except he just might.
No. She couldn’t let herself believe that. After a sleepless night, spent with Flynn and Isabella’s words resounding in her brain while her memories ran one long, sensual video of her evening with Zeke, she knew only one thing for certain: she was done with doing what other people said she should. Everyone in the whole villa thought they knew what was best for her, and Zeke was just the latest in a long line.
Well, she was done with it.
‘You realise that you’re choosing what other people expect of you over what you really want, right?’ Zeke said, and she glared at him.
‘How would you know what I want? And if you make one single innuendo or reference to last night after that comment I’m walking out right now.’
The smirk on his face told her that was exactly what Zeke had been about to do, but instead he said, ‘Because I’ve seen you do it before, far too many times. You admitted you wouldn’t have come with me even if Helena hadn’t needed you. But why? I can tell you, even if you don’t know yourself.’
Thea rolled her eyes. ‘Enlighten me, oh, wise one,’ she said, as sarcastically as she could manage.
‘Because you’re scared. Because you’ve spent your whole life doing what other people think is best for you and you don’t even know how to stop. You can’t make peace with your own desires because you think they might upset someone.’
‘They upset me!’ Thea yelled. ‘Zeke! Do you think I want to be this person? The sort of woman who sleeps with the best man the night before her wedding? I hate myself right now! The best thing I can do is try and get back to my regularly scheduled life, without the chaos you bring into it. Is that so bad?’
‘Not if the regularly scheduled life is what you really want.’
Zeke moved closer, and Thea’s body started to hum at his nearness.
‘But I don’t think it is. I think that you want more. You want a life that makes your heart sing. You want it all.’
He swayed closer again, and before she knew it his hand was at her waist, pulling her towards him, and his lips were dipping towards hers...
She wanted this so badly. Wanted his mouth on hers, his body against her. But she couldn’t have it. Not if she wanted all the other things she’d promised herself—her family, security, her work. This was her last chance to get things right—and she had to take it. However tempted she was to give in to desire over sense.
‘No, Zeke.’ She pushed him away, not letting her palms linger on his chest for a moment longer than necessary. ‘I’m marrying Flynn.’
‘Then you’re a fool.’
Zeke stepped away, turning his back on her, but not before she saw the flash in his eyes of—what? Anger? Frustration? She couldn’t be sure.
‘I’m making the sensible decision,’ Thea said, even though it felt as if her heart might force its way out of her sensible ribcage at any moment to fight its own case.
‘You’re making a mistake.’
‘Am I?’ Thea shook her head. This was going to hurt. And this was going to make him angry. But she needed to say it. Hell, she’d been waiting eight years to tell him this. It was past due. ‘What about you? You say I’m relyi
ng on other people to tell me how to live, but how are you any better?’
‘I live my life exactly the way I want.’ Zeke ran his hand through his messy hair as he turned back towards her. ‘By my own judgement. No archaic family loyalty rules or duty to manipulative men.’
‘Really? Seems to me that everything you’ve done since you left—hell, even leaving in the first place—has all been more about your father than you.’
Zeke shook his head. ‘You don’t know what you’re talking about.’
‘I do,’ Thea said firmly. ‘Because I know you, Zeke. You said you wanted to leave Morrison-Ashton and everything it represented behind when you left. But what did you do? You went and worked for another media conglomerate and then set up your own rival company, for heaven’s sake!’
‘Stick with what you know, and all that,’ Zeke said with a shrug, but Thea wasn’t listening.
‘And now you’re here, still trying to prove to everyone that you don’t need them. You’re still so bitter about your father giving Flynn the job you wanted—’
‘It’s not just that!’
‘You’re so bitter,’ Thea carried on, ‘that you can’t move on. I bet even when you were away you were still checking up on your family. People keep saying that you walked out and left us, but you didn’t. You’ve carried us with you every step of the way and, Zeke, that chip on your shoulder is only getting bigger and heavier. And until you let it go you’re never going to be happy. Not even if I left with you right now.’
* * *
‘You’re wrong,’ Zeke said, but even as he spoke he could feel the truth of her words resonating through his body. ‘I’m done with the lot of you for good this time.’
Her smile was sad, but it enraged him. Who was she to tell him the mistakes he was making in his life? Thea Morrison—the queen of bad decisions. And, even if she didn’t know it yet, this was the worst one. Well, she’d have a long, miserable marriage during which to regret it.
Zeke might have been willing to take a lot from Thea Morrison, but this was the last. The last rejection he’d ever face from anyone with the surname Morrison or Ashton.
He was done.
His chest ached as he realised this might be the last time he ever saw her. That he was walking away again and she wouldn’t be coming with him this time, either. He choked back a laugh as he realised the awful truth. She’d been right all along. She’d been right not to leave with him eight years ago. They had been kids. And he knew now that he hadn’t even understood what love was then.
He couldn’t have loved Thea at eighteen—not really. He hadn’t known her the way he did now, for a start. But mostly he knew it had to be true because, however much he’d thought it had hurt to leave her last time, it didn’t come close to the pain searing through his body at the thought of leaving her now..
He loved Thea Morrison, the woman she’d grown up to be, more than he’d ever believed possible. And it didn’t make a bit of difference.
None of it mattered now. Not their past, not this horrific week in Tuscany, and certainly not their impossible future. When he left this time he wouldn’t be coming back. And he knew just how to make sure that every atom of his relationship with these people was left behind too.
‘Maybe you don’t know it yet,’ he said, keeping his voice calm and even, ‘but you’re going to make yourself, my brother, and everyone else around you desperately unhappy if you go through with this wedding. I love you. And I would have done anything to make you happy. Anything except stay here and live this safe life you think you want. But it will end up driving you mad. One day you’re going to wake up and realise all that, and know what a mistake you’ve made. But, like you say, it’s your mistake to make.’
He didn’t look back as he walked to the door. He didn’t want to see her standing there, beautiful, sad and resolved. She loved him—he knew it. But she wasn’t going to let herself have the one thing that could make her happy.
Fine. It was her mistake, as she’d said.
But she couldn’t make him watch.
‘Goodbye, Thea,’ he said as he walked out through the door.
* * *
The door shut behind him with a click, although it felt like an earth-shattering slam to Thea. She’d done it. She’d really done it. She’d sent him away, made the right decision for once. Avoided the oh, so tempting mistake she’d made so many times before. She’d won.
So why did she feel so broken?
Sinking into the chair, Thea sat very still and waited for whatever would happen next. The stylist would be here soon, she vaguely remembered, to do her hair and make-up. Helena would come and find her when it was time, wouldn’t she? And in the meantime...she’d just wait for someone to tell her what she was supposed to do.
The irony of her thoughts surprised a laugh from her, and she buried her face in her hands before her laughter turned to tears. The decision was made and Zeke would leave now. She could get back to that regularly scheduled life she’d been hankering after for the past three days.
It was over at last.
Hearing a click, she looked up again in time to see the door open. For one fleeting moment her heart jumped at the thought that it might be Zeke, coming back to try and win her one last time. But, really, what else was there to say? They’d both said everything they needed to, everything they’d been holding in for the last eight years. That moment had passed. Their moment.
Flynn stuck his head around the door and, seeing she was alone, came in, shutting it behind him.
‘Everything okay?’ he asked, hovering nervously at a distance.
Poor Flynn. The things she’d put him through this week... He was such a good man. He didn’t deserve it.
So she tried very hard to smile as she looked up at him, to make him feel wanted and loved. To feel like the winner he’d turned out to be. Her man, her choice, her future. Now and always.
‘Fine,’ she said, her cheeks aching. ‘But I’m afraid you’re going to need a new best man.’
The look of relief on his face was almost reward enough. ‘I think I can arrange that.’
He moved towards her, settling on the arm of her chair, one hand at her shoulder in a comforting fatherly gesture. He’d be a brilliant dad, Thea thought again. It was important to focus on all the excellent reasons she had for marrying him, rather than the one uncertain and confusing reason not to.
‘Are you okay?’ Flynn asked, and Thea nodded.
‘I’m fine. It was...a little difficult, that’s all.’
‘And you’re sure you want to go through with this today? I mean, I appreciate you choosing me, Thea, I really do. And I think it’s the right decision. We’re going to have a great future together, I know. But it doesn’t have to start today—not if you don’t want. We could postpone—’
‘No,’ Thea interrupted. ‘I’ve made my choice. I want to do this.’
Before she changed her mind.
* * *
Zeke didn’t knock on his father’s office door. He didn’t need permission or approval from his father for what was going to happen next. In fact he didn’t need anything from him. That was sort of the point.
Ezekiel Ashton looked up as Zeke walked in, and his eyebrows rose in amused interest. ‘Zeke. Shouldn’t you be off practising your best man’s speech somewhere?’
‘I believe that by now Flynn will have chosen a better man.’ Zeke dropped into the visitor’s chair, slouching casually. ‘I’ll be leaving as soon as I’m packed.’
Guests would start arriving soon, he was sure, for the pre-wedding drinks reception that Isabella had insisted on when she’d discovered that Thea planned a late afternoon wedding. He could probably grab one of the taxis bringing people up from the hotel to get him to the airport. He’d call his assistant while he packed and get her to book a fli
ght.
This time tomorrow he’d be in another country. Another life.
‘You’re not staying, then.’ Ezekiel shook his head sadly and turned his attention back to his paperwork. ‘I don’t know why I’m surprised.’
He doesn’t matter. Nothing he thinks or does matters to me any more.
‘I have one piece of business to conclude with you before I go,’ Zeke said, watching in amusement as he became of interest to his father again.
‘Oh, yes? I was under the impression that the very idea of doing business with your own father was distasteful to you.’
‘It is,’ Zeke said bluntly. ‘But it has come to my attention that it may be the only way to sever my ties with you for good.’
‘You make it sound so violent,’ Ezekiel said. ‘When really all you’re doing is running away from your responsibilities. And, Zeke, we all know that you’ll come back again eventually. We’re family. That’s what you do for family.’
Zeke shook his head. ‘Not this one. Do you know why I left eight years ago?’
‘Because you felt slighted that I’d given a position you considered rightfully yours to your brother.’
‘No.’ Zeke thought back to that horrible day and for the first time felt a strange detachment from the events. ‘Because I finally understood why you’d done it. I heard you that day, talking to Thomas about us. I’d come to talk to you about you giving Flynn my job—the one I’d always been promised. I had all these arguments ready...’ He shook his head at the memory of his righteous younger self. ‘I heard you laugh and say that you realised now that perhaps it wasn’t such a misfortune that Mum had fallen pregnant twenty-one years ago, just as Flynn’s adoption was confirmed. That while you hadn’t planned for two children perhaps it had all been for the best after all.’
He’d stood frozen outside his father’s office door, Zeke remembered, his hand half raised to knock. And he’d listened as his father had ruined his relationship with his brother for good.
‘This way,’ Ezekiel had said, ‘they have built-in competition. In some ways it’s better, having two sons. Flynn has always felt he has to earn his place, so he fights for it—he fights to belong every day. And as long as I let Zeke feel that he’s the disappointment, the second son, he’ll keep fighting to best his brother. It’s a perfect set-up.’