by Maria Geraci
“I have the most wonderful news,” Jessica began. “I’m moving to Whispering Bay!”
“You…are? But what about your job in Miami?”
“Since I confided in you that day in the bathroom I feel like you’re my one true friend here in town, so I don’t mind telling you that I was wrong. I should have never put Nate on the spot like that. Demanding that he quit his job and everything. I guess it’s old-fashioned of me, but I’ve discovered that I have more respect for a man who doesn’t let a woman lead him around by the nose.”
“Um, yeah, I can see that.”
“And I missed him so terribly, but I didn’t know how to reach out to him without wounding my pride.” She reached inside her tote and pulled out a copy of The Gazette. “And then I saw this article on the Internet and my heart just went out to him. I knew my breakup would devastate him, but this bit about him getting comfort from a little dog? Nate doesn’t even like dogs! If Nate can let go of his ego and admit to the world that he’s lonely without me, then I can swallow my pride, too. So I convinced my law firm to open up a branch here in the panhandle. It’s a huge pay cut, but money isn’t everything, you know?”
Lauren nodded, too numb to speak. Her mind was whirling a mile a minute. “Does Nate know you’re here?” she heard herself croak.
“I just saw him! You should have seen the look on his face.” Jessica sighed dreamily. “I’d forgotten how incredibly handsome he is. I love him. And he loves me. And it looks like we’re getting our happily ever after, after all!”
“You saw Nate?” Lauren repeated like some dumb parrot who couldn’t form an original sentence on her own.
Jessica nodded. “I’m meeting him later tonight at his place. Good thing I still have a key to his house.” She lowered her voice. “I tried to return it, but he wouldn’t let me. That should have been my first clue that he was still clinging onto hope.” Her cell phone pinged. She pulled it out to look at the screen. “I’m sorry, but I need to take this.” She reached out and gave Lauren a stiff hug. “Thanks for listening to me ramble on about my love life. Hope to see you again soon!” Then she scurried off to take her call.
It was like a boulder had come plummeting down from the sky to land on her head. Jessica and Nate were getting back together? She wouldn’t believe it until she heard it from Nate himself. Lauren found him at the medical booth talking to a couple of the Gray Flamingoes about high cholesterol. He spotted her and excused himself away from the conversation.
“I’m glad you’re here,” he said. He took her by the elbow and led her away from the curious looks Bianca and Lola were giving them. “I just ran into Jessica.”
“Looks like it’s contagious. You don’t happen to have a vaccine for that, do you?”
“What? You saw her, too?”
She nodded.
“Fuck,” he muttered. “What did she say to you?”
“Just that she was moving to town and that the two of you were getting back together.”
“Jessica and I are not getting back together,” Nate said firmly.
“That’s what I thought. But…I wanted to hear it from you. She said she had a key to your house. That she tried to give it back to you, but you wouldn’t let her.”
“Not completely true. She tried to give it back to me after the proposal, when she said we were through. I told her to think about it. The next morning…I just forgot.” He suddenly looked uneasy. “I’ll demand that she give it back to me immediately.”
“She said she was meeting you later tonight. At your place.”
“She said that?”
“Nate, I think you owe it to her to hear her out.” He began to protest, but she cut him off. “She’s back in town now and you can’t avoid her. Not forever. So, just…go talk to her and either end it completely in a way she understands, or…get back together with her. Your choice.” It was all she could do to keep her voice from cracking.
He shook his head. “I don’t know what I have to say to you, but I’m not getting back with her. Ever.”
“Okay, good.”
His gaze flicked back to his booth, then to the rest of the festival grounds. He sighed heavily. “What do you plan to do tonight?”
She shrugged. “I’ve been on my feet all day, so Dhara and I will break down the booth and take the rest of the stuff to the shop. Then I’ll probably go home and crash.” She didn’t tell him that Henry wouldn’t be there. It didn’t seem to matter now.
“I’ll call you,” he said.
“All right.” In the background she could hear Harry Tuba and his polka band warming up for tonight’s performance. It was a huge let down from Billy Brenton, but then, the day had started out so promising on all fronts.
A brand new looking sports car with a Dade County license plate sat parked in his garage like it belonged there, and his house was lit up like a fucking Christmas tree. Nate killed the engine on his SUV and prepared himself to face Jessica.
He opened his front door. The smell of marinara sauce hit him smack in the face. Hector ran in the house, realized that someone he didn’t know was inside, and began to bark furiously.
“You’re home!” Jessica cried. She ran to greet him wearing the same short skirt she’d paraded around in at the festival. Only now she also had on an apron and was barefoot. She reached up to kiss him but he angled his face away just in time to avoid any contact with his mouth. It didn’t seem to bother her, though. “Oh, my God! I heard you got a dog.”
Jessica fell to her knees and grabbed Hector into a tight hug. “Aren’t you adorable!” She glanced up at him. “Nate! You told me you didn’t like dogs! Where was he today at the festival?” She began talking to Hector in a high shrill voice. Hector seemed to be buying it. He stopped barking and licked Jessica across the face.
“My sister had him when you saw me. Can you give me my house key back, please?” he said.
“But, honey, aren’t you glad to see me?” she pouted. “I made your favorite—spaghetti and meatballs, and Cesar salad, and I even bought some brownies from a local bakery. I made sure to get ones with nuts, just for you.”
“That’s nice, Jessica, but we aren’t having dinner together.”
“Why not?” She stood up, scooping Hector into her arms.
“Because we aren’t a couple anymore. Hell, we’re not even friends.”
“But, I already told you back at that festival thingie, I’m sorry. I made a huge mistake. If I could take back that night at The Harbor House I’d do it all completely different.”
“The thing is, though, Jessica, I wouldn’t.”
She looked like he’d just punched her in the face. He didn’t want to hurt her feelings, but she needed to realize they were never getting back together.
“Is this your way of punishing me?” she screeched, causing Hector to whine. “You want me to grovel? Okay, I’ll grovel. I’m sorry, Nate. I made a huge mistake. I love you and I know you love me. Please take me back, baby. I promise, you won’t be sorry.” Hector began to squirm uncomfortably, so Jessica put him down on the ground. He immediately ran into his crate. Nate wished he could follow him inside.
He tried to gentle his voice. “Jessica, we just aren’t compatible anymore. We want different things in life.”
“But that’s just it! We did want different things, but I’ve changed. I know you want kids, and well, I’m okay with that. And I’ve given up my job and everything to come live here with you. What more do you want from me?”
Nothing, he realized. There was absolutely nothing he wanted from her, because he wanted everything from someone else.
“You shouldn’t have given up your job without talking to me first. I’m sure it’s not too late to get it back.”
She pulled off her apron and tossed it angrily onto the floor. “It is too late to get it back. I’ve already taken another position with the firm. Nearby in Panama City. And I did it because you said that’s what you wanted.”
“I admit, it’s what I di
d want. But it’s not what I want now.”
“Listen to yourself. It’s been five months, Nate. Can you really turn off your feelings for me that quickly?”
She was beginning to sound like Lauren. To someone else, the argument made perfect sense. But he could go only go off of what he felt. He owed it to Jessica, he realized, to tell her the truth. He braced himself for her backlash.
“Let’s sit down and talk,” he urged.
“That’s more like it.” She plopped herself down on the sofa. He sat down as well, careful to keep a good three feet away from her.
“We had some good times, Jessica, we truly did. And I did care for you. But—”
“Do you still have my ring?” she asked. She flung her left hand out in the air and wiggled her fingers. “I got a manicure just for the occasion. I’m ready to wear it now.”
Ring? Was she delusional?
“Jessica, I returned the ring.”
“What? Oh, well, you can get it back, though, right? I don’t think I ever told you how absolutely gorgeous it was. But then, you always did have superb taste.”
He took a deep breath and started again. “Back to what I saying. I think that I confused what I felt for you with love, and if you look deep down inside, that’s probably what you’re doing now as well. If you really loved me, you wouldn’t have turned down my proposal. We would have found a way to make it work. And if I truly loved you, I wouldn’t have been able to move on as quickly as I have.”
“Move on?”
“I meant, move past.”
She flinched. “No, you didn’t. You’re always so God damn literal. What? Is this your way of telling me you have a new girlfriend already?”
He didn’t say anything.
“Wait…don’t tell me you’re fucking Blondie.” Her eyes widened. “You are, aren’t you? I saw the look on her face when she saw me back at the festival. She looked like she’d seen a ghost. I knew she had the hots for you that night back at the restaurant, but I had no idea she moved this fast.”
“Don’t be crude, Jessica. It isn’t attractive.”
“Oh, she must be good. Well, lucky for you, I’m good, too. And I just so happen to be in a very forgiving mood.”
She tried to sidle up next to him, but Nate held her at arms’ length. “Cut it out.”
She quickly changed tactics. “I read that newspaper article about you,” she said, her voice soft and contrite now. “Was it all a lie? It made it sound like you missed me.” Her face scrunched up. “And…you lied to me, Nate. You told me you had a signed contract with Dr. Morrison and that’s why you couldn’t take the surgical fellowship down in Miami, when all this time you were free all along.” She began to sniffle. “Was our entire relationship just one big joke to you?”
“Don’t be dramatic. You know it wasn’t. As for the part about the contract—I do have a contract with Doc. It just isn’t a written one. If I mislead you on that count, then I’m truly sorry.”
“What am I supposed to do now?” she asked.
“I already told you. I suggest you try to get your old job back.”
She stood and tossed back her hair, all evidence of her near crying gone. “I’m not a quitter. You know that about me. I’m not giving up on this job and I’m not giving up on us. So, I suggest we sit down and eat dinner, and then later, we’ll go to bed—separate beds, that is, because I’m certainly not going to allow you to make love to me tonight. Not until you’re ready to admit you love me and want me back, that is.”
“You’re not staying here, Jessica.”
“Where am I supposed to go? It’s after nine and there isn’t a hotel in this town. Do you expect me to drive all the way to Destin or Panama City without a hotel reservation?”
He took out his cell phone. “I’ll make you one right now.”
“No.” She crossed her arms over her chest. Speaking of which…her cleavage seemed mightily enhanced since the last time he’d seen her. She followed his gaze and smiled. “That’s right. I even had surgery for you, Nate.”
“For me?”
“You think I never noticed the way you used to stare at other women when we were together? I have no pride left, Nate. I’ve given it all up. Just to win you back.”
He was speechless. Except then he realized this was exactly the way Jessica used to manipulate him when they were together. Why had it taken him so long to see what Lanie and his mother had clearly seen from the beginning? He felt like the world’s biggest chump for staying with her for so long.
“I’m not going to dignify that last piece of bullshit you just slung my way. We’re done, Jessica. Even if I have to physically remove you, I want you out of my house. Now.”
“I’m staying right here, Nate, and that’s that. Go ahead, kick me out. I dare you.” The gleam in her eye told him she was calling his bluff.
He’d love nothing more than to kick her ass to the curb. But obviously, he couldn’t really do that. “Fine, you stay here. I’ll go find somewhere else to spend the night.”
“Wait! That’s not what I meant!”
But Nate wasn’t waiting around for anything. He grabbed Hector from his cage, and walked out the door.
*~*~*
Lauren would always remember the day she realized her marriage was a sham. Oh, Tom had loved her (in his own way). He was kind. He was handsome, and smart, and funny. He was a good provider and a great father. All her friends back in Atlanta had been jealous of her. It wasn’t a bad way to go through life. She had so much more than a lot of other people. So whenever she began to wonder if there was something missing in her marriage, she immediately shut that feeling down. Ingrate! She’d think to herself.
And it had worked for almost eleven years. She’d gone through her marriage like one of those horses you blindfolded to get through some horrible procedure.
The funny thing was, it wasn’t some lightning bolt come down from the sky that had given her her epiphany. It had been something rather ordinary, and horrible at the same time.
Momma had been telling her for months that Daddy hadn’t been “right.” But Lauren had brushed it off. Then on a weekend visit to Whispering Bay, she’d seen it for herself. They’d gone out for dinner, just the three of them, Momma and Daddy and Lauren. Daddy had insisted on driving and Lauren hadn’t thought anything of it. On a perfectly normal evening, on what should have been a routine drive back from Panama City, a drive Daddy took two times a day, five days a week, for the past thirty-eight years, he’d gotten lost. Not going down the wrong street lost. But completely and utterly lost, like he’d never been on those roads in his life. He’d been so confused that Lauren had to insist he stop the car. They’d argued briefly by the road side and Lauren had ended up snatching the keys from his hands.
The rest of the drive had been uncomfortably silent. A month later, they got Daddy’s diagnosis of Alzheimer’s disease. She had tried not to cry, of course. But it had been impossible. She sat on that chair in Doc Morrison’s office and the tears had come fast and furious. So she’d reached out to get a Kleenex, and that’s when she saw the look on her Daddy’s face.
You would think most people would be devastated. He was a smart man. He knew what he was being told. But in that moment, when he was being told that his life, as he knew it, was forever and irrevocably going to change, it hadn’t been self-pity she’d seen. Or anger. Or any of the other mishmash of emotions that must have crossed his brain. It had been concern. Not for Lauren. Oh, she knew Daddy loved her. And it wasn’t concern for himself, either. In that most horrible moment of his life, he sat there, clutching his wife’s hand and looking at her with such profound love and sorrow. For her. Because her pain was more important to him than his own.
It was in that moment that Lauren knew that she and Tom would never look at one another like that. So she made up her mind. She asked him for a divorce. He fought her at first, but eventually, he relented. And then he’d come to see that she’d been right. He found his perfect match i
n Allie. And Lauren was happy for him. But at the same time, she wanted to be happy, too.
*~*~*
This was the part of the movie that always made Lauren cry. She stuffed popcorn in her mouth, while wiping the tears off her cheeks (a multitasking art form she excelled at, even if she said so herself). George Bailey was going to end it all. He was going to throw himself off the bridge simply because he might be sent off to prison for embezzlement. Sure, prison was no picnic. But it was the forties, and things seemed so much cleaner then. Not like the way prison seemed on Orange Is the New Black. That place, would definitely suck big time.
Besides, didn’t George know how much everyone loved him? She supposed that was the point of the movie. Learning to be grateful for the important things in life—friendship, family, love…boyfriends.
This morning she had a boyfriend. Her first official boyfriend in thirteen years. But tonight, she had nothing. Well, she had George Bailey, and that was certainly something. Jimmy Stewart was nothing to sneeze at, that’s for sure.
Her doorbell rang. It was past nine-thirty and she was in her pjs. She paused the movie and peeked out the window. It was Nate.
Her heart hiccupped in her chest.
He said he’d call, but instead, here he was. What if he was coming to tell her that he was getting back with Jessica? She’d have to be brave. She’d have to wish him good luck and all that. She could do it. If she had to. Because if that’s what he was coming over to tell her, then she’d have no choice.
She rubbed her tongue against her teeth to make sure there were no hidden popcorn kernels stuck anywhere and opened the front door. She ate him up with her eyes. He wore the same clothes he had on at the festival. Cargo shorts and an FSU T-shirt. Nothing special really, but he still looked wonderful. Hector was with him, too.
Nate saw the tears on her face and he didn’t wait to be asked inside. Instead, he put Hector on the ground, then he picked her up in his arms, kicked the door closed, and deposited her on the couch. “Thank God you’re here.”