by Kit Berry
As she and Yul walked into the Circle, Sylvie thought for a second she saw someone already in there at the far end, but realised her mistake as her eyes adjusted to the brightness. The decorations of Autumn Equinox still graced every stone, and the girls started their usual autumn game of spotting the hidden dormice that Merewen always included for the children’s amusement. Bluebell still held on tightly to her sister, but then Celandine shook her off and began a leaping, joyful dance in the centre, her hair flying and her arms outstretched. Bluebell rushed over and clung onto Yul, her thumb in her mouth, and he picked her up and kissed her.
‘Come on, Suck-a-thumb! I thought you were going to stop that now you’re five!’
They watched Celandine for a while as she improvised the most beautiful dance, honouring every stone and becoming an autumn leaf herself, just as she’d done at the previous Samhain in the Barn.
‘She really is talented,’ murmured Sylvie. ‘It’s not just moondancing – this is actual dancing genius. I wonder if she’ll want to train and become a professional when she’s older?’
‘Maybe, and in that case we’ll back her all the way,’ said Yul, gazing at their child in wonder. ‘And the same if she doesn’t want to either. She can stay at Stonewylde and delight everyone here with her dance.’
‘What do you want to do, Blue?’ asked Sylvie, stroking the younger child’s curls as she clung like a bush-baby in Yul’s arms.
‘I want to be a mummy,’ said Bluebell. ‘And I want to write stories. Can I do both of those?’
‘Of course you can,’ laughed Yul. ‘I haven’t seen your hare story lately, have I? How’s it coming on?’
‘It’s lovely!’ said Bluebell, pulling away from his shoulder so she could see his face. ‘Magpie’s done some drawings for it and it’s so pretty! Celandine’s not doing writing much any more but I still am, and I got another one too about the Bluebell Faeries. I’ll show you when we get home, Father.’
‘That’ll be wonderful,’ he said, kissing her on the nose.
‘You can really see Magpie’s influence here in the Circle, can’t you?’ said Sylvie, wandering around and gazing up at the paintings. ‘It’s always looked beautiful, but since he’s been involved the magic has somehow felt even stronger.’
‘That’s true,’ said Yul. ‘I must talk to Merewen before they start decorating for Samhain. I’m not sure if she’ll remember that the Death Dance won’t be held up here any more. I don’t want the normal ghoulish motifs in our Stone Circle.’
‘What did you have in mind then?’
‘The crows and other black birds are fine,’ he said. ‘It’s the skulls and images of death that I object to.’
‘But Yul, it is the Festival of the Dead.’
‘I know. But I prefer to think of it by its other name, the Festival of the Ancestors.’
‘Are they holding the Death Dance down at the other yew this year?’
‘I believe so. I think Clip’s spoken to some of the older folk about it.’
‘So will there be any kind of ceremony up here at all?’
‘No, nothing. I’ve said we’ll keep the bonfires and the labyrinth and wicker dome in the Village as usual. That works far better. This Circle, at Samhain, has far too many connotations and memories for me . . .’
She squeezed his hand, thinking back to the previous Samhain and the terrible night when that storm had brewed up out of nowhere. It was the first time the awful scent and presence of Magus had become really apparent. Just remembering the experience she’d endured in the chambers, with no electricity and that great slash of lightning, made Sylvie’s skin prickle. She snuggled up to his arm and closed her eyes.
‘Yul, I really love you.’
‘And I really love you, my beautiful Sylvie,’ he said, stooping with Bluebell still in his arms to kiss her.
‘There’s something wonderful I want to tell—’
‘Ah, very touching! What a perfect little family you are!’
They swung round to see Buzz coming through a gap in the stones. They froze whilst Celandine, dancing alone in the centre, stumbled and stopped. Buzz walked over to her, and Yul and Sylvie hurried towards them.
‘I thought you’d left!’ said Yul, heart pounding furiously.
‘I’m about to go,’ said Buzz, hatred veiling his face. ‘But I thought I’d have one last look at the old Stone Circle.’
His gaze swept around, taking in the great stones, the faded paintings, the golden trees beyond. Sylvie found she was barely breathing and felt dizzy. She clutched on to Yul’s arm and pulled Celandine in, so they formed a tight-knit little group. She couldn’t look Buzz in the eye but she felt Yul next to her blazing with hostility, glaring aggressively at the intruder. Her heart thumped loudly too, but with dread. Buzz’s next words confirmed her fears; why had she ever hoped he’d let her off the hook?
‘What beautiful dancing, Celandine! You told me before that you loved to dance but I had no idea you were so talented.’
‘What?’ Yul snarled. ‘What are you on about?’
‘Oh, didn’t Sylvie tell you?’
‘Tell me what?’
‘Or Celandine? Oh, Celandine, surely you told your daddy what a lovely time we spent together?’
‘Buzz, leave her out of it!’ cried Sylvie. ‘Don’t get the children involved.’
‘Involved in what? What the hell’s going on?’ shouted Yul, his face white and his eyes flashing fury. ‘Sylvie, what is he talking about?’
He turned on her and she read in his expression not only his anger at Buzz, but his wounded pride at being made to look a fool like this. She hung her head and Celandine turned to face her father.
‘It was when Mummy and I went to see the ballet. Buzz was there too and he bought me an ice-cream.’
‘I don’t believe this!’ spat Yul. ‘Why didn’t you tell me?’
Buzz laughed, and Yul started to peel Bluebell off his chest, trying to loosen the grip of her arms and legs and set her on the ground.
‘We knew you’d be cross,’ said Celandine, ‘so we thought we’d better not say anything.’
‘Yul, please! He just turned up and—’
‘That wasn’t the only reason you didn’t tell him, was it, Sylvie?’
Buzz’s face too was pale, ready for action, but he smiled.
‘Sylvie, what is he on about?’ shouted Yul. ‘I suggest you go now, Buzz, before I—’
He stopped and took a deep breath. His daughters both looked up at him with enormous round eyes and he took another lungful of air. Buzz laughed and began to back away, giving a little wave of farewell.
‘I’ll be off then. But Sylvie, don’t forget to tell him everything, will you? We managed to conceal what we were up to in the theatre of course, but as for what happened at the nursing home all those years ago . . .’
25
‘No, Celandine, we’re not going up to Hare Stone tonight,’ said Sylvie. ‘I’ll take you to the Village Green if it’s not too cold.’
The child looked at her mother, noting her pallor and dull eyes, and nodded.
‘Do you think Father will come?’ she asked quietly.
Sylvie merely shook her head.
‘Was it my fault for telling him about the ballet?’
‘No, of course not,’ said Sylvie wearily. ‘It’s always best to tell the truth. We should have done that at the time instead of pretending it didn’t happen. But Father’s not cross with you, darling. He knows you were only doing what I told you to do.’
‘Will it all get better again?’ asked Celandine sadly. ‘We were so happy and I thought we were all going to live together again.’
‘I’m sure we are, but at the moment Father’s too upset.’
‘When we were all in the Stone Circle, I thought he was going to hurt Buzz,’ said Celandine. ‘It was horrible. Blue and I were really scared.’
‘I know – I’m so sorry you had to see all that. Buzz was deliberately provoking him, but Father let Bu
zz walk away even though he wanted to be nasty back to him. That takes a lot of strength.’
‘I suppose so,’ said Celandine. ‘Oh Mum, I wish we could all be together again up at Hare Stone! It was so wonderful before, all of us there with our picnic and feeling so joyful.’
‘I know, and we will go up there together for the Moon Fullness again one day, maybe in the spring when it’s warm. We’ll sort this out and we’ll all be happy soon. Poor Father – I can’t tell you how bad I feel about it, Celandine.’
The little girl threw her slim arms around her mother’s neck and kissed her pale face.
‘When we dance for the Bright Lady tonight we’ll ask her to help make it all better with moon magic, shall we, Mum?’
Leveret stood on the roof of the tower with Clip, gazing out at the golden trees all around. Shadow was by her side, remarkably calm and well-behaved for a puppy, and Hare lay in her arms like a long-eared baby. The autumn air was chill, fragrant with wood-smoke and the promise of winter ahead.
‘Five more days,’ she said sadly, standing close to the man beside her. ‘I can’t tell you how much I’ll miss you.’
‘I know, Leveret, and I feel the same. But please – let’s look at this in a positive way. You can never truly be the Shaman whilst I’m still here and you need to grow into your new role. As for me – all I’ve ever wanted to do is be free of the coils of Stonewylde. I made a terrible mistake as a young man and when Sylvie came here, I behaved badly again. In life I think we’re given chances to rectify our wrongs, but I failed, and consequently never gained the one thing I really wanted – the freedom to roam. Of course, a huge compensation this past year has been you coming into my life, a joy I’d never expected. But I feel finally that I’ve paid my dues for all past wrongs and can be free, so you must let me go with a happy heart.’
She nodded, stroking Hare’s soft coat and trying not to cry.
‘And tonight you want to be alone for the Moon Fullness?’
‘Yes, Leveret – I’d like to spend my last one at Stonewylde up in the Dolmen alone, if you don’t mind, especially as it’s an eclipse. It seems fitting, given the name my mother and Old Heggy chose for me. Anyway, you love being in the cottage for the Moon Fullness, don’t you?’
‘Yes, I do,’ she said quietly, her throat aching. ‘But I thought . . . the last one?’
‘We’d neither of us get anywhere, would we? You’d be tearful and I’d be sad and guilty at making you tearful, and we’d never manage to journey. Better that we see this Hunter’s Moon as a new beginning. I’m sure Mother Heggy will visit you as she did last month, especially as it’s so close to Samhain.’
‘What about Samhain? Will we spend that together?’
‘I’m not sure. You know the Death Dance won’t be taking place in the Stone Circle any more? I suppose I should offer my services at the Yew of Death, but what I’d really like to do is spend the evening in the Circle alone, taking leave of the ancestors there. Everyone else will be in the Village so it should be very special.’
‘Maybe I could join you for that?’ she asked hopefully. ‘As a farewell ceremony before you leave the next morning?’
‘What a good idea!’ he said. ‘Let’s do that.’
Mallow lugged a great basket of logs towards the hearth, dragging them across the floor and leaving a trail of mess in her wake. Old Violet, rocking in her chair with a pipe in her gnarled hand, watched her malevolently. As Mallow staggered past she tried to stick out her boot but failed, and sat cursing and muttering.
‘Was you speaking to me, Mother Violet?’ asked Mallow, straightening her aching back.
‘No I weren’t, stupid girl,’ she mumbled.
‘You got a nice load o’ logs chopped out there,’ said Mallow. ‘Was that my Swift’s doing?’
‘No, ’twere Jay’s doing! Your Swift ain’t been for days – can’t be bothered no more. Jay’s a good lad and he spent a fine evening with his old Great Aunt Violet. Gave him some tips and wrinkles, I did, and he’s set up now – knows what’s about.’
She chuckled hoarsely at this and clamped her gums around the stem of her pipe to draw the smoke deep into her lungs.
‘Our Jay’s all set up for Hunter’s Moon, right enough,’ she sputtered through the smoke. ‘Old Violet knows, as ever. All is set and ’twill be my own boy’s time soon. The wheel turns as ever, and ’tis almost a year and a day.’
‘Yes, Mother Violet,’ said Mallow, taking the broom to sweep up the mess she’d created.
‘And you better watch your tail and all,’ said Violet, hawking and aiming into the crackling fire. ‘Dark Angel will be abroad soon enough, stalking and searching.’
Mallow’s face registered terror and she hastily made the sign of the pentangle on her chest.
‘Aye, the weeding out will soon begin, and not afore time!’ said Violet, her evil chuckle hanging in the smoky air.
Miranda knocked on Yul’s study door and went straight in, giving him no chance to refuse entry. He was at his desk staring at the computer screen, but didn’t seem to be getting much work done. He looked up at her wearily.
‘Time for a quick chat?’ she asked, sitting down on the sofa. He sighed and joined her.
‘Yes, especially now I no longer need worry about the money situation,’ he said. ‘Suddenly from having the whole thing to fret about, I’ve become a simple farm manager.’
‘Hardly,’ she said. ‘There’ll be a huge amount of co-ordination involved, won’t there? Presumably you’ll get someone professional in to do a proper survey of the building and repairs needed?’
He nodded unenthusiastically.
‘Anyway, Christopher’s phoned to say he’s coming down. He’ll oversee the charitable trust handover before Clip leaves on November 1st and he’ll work with the local lawyer Clip’s been using. They’ll get the new Board of Trustees signed up and then Christopher can start proceedings for the funds to be assigned. It won’t be instant; it could take quite some time, because of all the legal stuff.’
‘But . . . your mother hasn’t passed on yet, has she?’
‘No, but apparently my father set up many different funds and some are available now, so Christopher wants to get the ball rolling. Of course this money is purely for the healing centre, so although we can use it to renovate the Hall, we can’t use it for stuff like general repairs to the Great Barn or the water supply to the Village, much as I’d like to.’
‘The money Leveret’s giving can do that.’
‘Christopher’s offered to advise us on Magus’ Will too, if we want. It seems that Buzz is actually the Trustee for all three minors, and whilst Rowan might be happy for Faun’s shares to be controlled by him, Maizie and I certainly don’t want him in charge of our children’s inheritances for any longer than necessary. Personal issues aside, it doesn’t really seem ethical for him to control all the shares.’
‘Christopher would be perfect for that – I liked him when we met in London,’ said Yul. ‘But can Leveret and Rufus afford to have him advise? I shouldn’t imagine he comes cheap.’
Miranda smiled a little wistfully.
‘I’m sure he’ll offer us a good rate,’ she said, ‘given that he’s probably earning huge fees from handling my parents’ estate. I don’t see why he can’t do this as a favour, but I’ll negotiate that. I’m glad you like him. He’s a decent man, and he’s been very kind and supportive in all this.’
‘Okay, that’ll be great then.’
‘Are you alright for him to stay at Stonewylde as a guest? It seems a bit silly him staying Outside in a hotel and driving in every day, and it’d be nice for him to get a feel of the place.’
‘It’s Clip who decides that, but of course I’m happy for it.’
Miranda gazed at him, noting the droop of his head and the fatigue in his face.
‘What’s wrong, Yul? You’ve been down since Buzz’s visit. Were you upset that you weren’t one of Magus’ beneficiaries? We could always ask Christopher abou
t contesting the Will, if you wanted to go that route.’
‘No,’ said Yul, smiling wanly. ‘To be frank, I wouldn’t want his money anyway. It’s different for Leveret, Faun and Rufus – and Buzz too of course – but Magus hated me and I wouldn’t want to take his money. It would feel dirty to me, as if I’d gone back on my principles. I don’t mean the others shouldn’t take it, of course. It’s just—’
‘No, I understand and I’d feel exactly the same if he’d left me anything. But it is different for the other children, and I’m just glad that they’re going to benefit. Rufus is so keen to study medicine one day, and I believe he’s bright enough. The thought of him working here, with Hazel and Leveret, and maybe a team of other healers and doctors . . . the whole thing is quite unbelievable really. But you’re obviously unhappy. Sylvie confided in me about what happened the other day in the Stone Circle, when Buzz told you about turning up at the ballet. That was a terrible thing to do, but you mustn’t let it get you down.’
‘I know,’ said Yul. ‘I’m trying to just put it to one side but I can’t. I feel . . . I feel so betrayed that she and Buzz had a secret together that they kept for ages.’
‘This reaction is exactly why he told you and you’re behaving precisely as he wants! I know that recently you and Sylvie managed to patch things up. I’d hoped to see you moving back in together by now and I really can’t see why you haven’t. This latest thing from Buzz is nothing, yet he’s managed to come between you. Sylvie was completely blameless. You mustn’t treat her as if she’s been unfaithful to you.’
Yul coloured at this but because he turned to the window, his mother-in-law failed to notice.
‘I’ll get over it, Miranda, really. I know it’s stupid. It’s just . . . touched a nerve, I guess.’
For one moment he was almost tempted to tell her about Rainbow. He desperately felt the need to confide in someone and offload the guilt, and wished now that he’d told Sylvie long before. Or even on the day when Buzz had done his best to provoke him into some kind of adolescent behaviour – he should have come clean then, whilst she was looking so guilty. But the children had been there, crying and clinging, and how could he have told their beautiful mother that whilst she may have been the victim of Buzz’s groping, he’d actually gone a great deal further than that with Rainbow? The nagging, gnawing knowledge was blighting everything, and he needed to deal with it. Yul resolved that he’d find Sylvie later and just tell her straight. Hopefully, in view of the Buzz situation, she’d be understanding and maybe find it in her heart to forgive him. Telling her voluntarily would count in his favour, surely?