by Faith Starr
Susanna and Jack, the owners of the ranch, made it a habit to send their private van to the airport to collect the new batch of guests. They ran the ranch like a camp with a start and end date. A person couldn’t just show up during the week. Reservations had to be made months in advance. There were planned activities, some structured, some not. Most, if not all, of which I didn’t attend.
They kept the groups intimate, only allowing at most fifteen guests to visit during a session. They loved to personally get to know every visitor. Susanna and Jack were awesome.
With my guitar case handle firmly in my grasp and my duffle strap slung over my shoulder, I exited the plane and zipped through the crowd to baggage claim. That’s where I saw Brian, Susanna and Jack’s son and ranch hand.
“Hey bro.” He pulled me in for a semi-hug, both of us patting each other on the back.
“Good to see you. Where’s Layla?”
“She’s out front with the van. Some of the other guests arrived earlier.”
“Excellent. I’ve got my duffel and my guitar. I’m good to go.”
“How’s the tour going?”
“Great. No complaints on my end. But I’m definitely ready for a little R and R.”
“Good luck getting my parents to give you some.” He chuckled. “They have a busy week planned for you guys.”
“They know I’m not one to follow the rules.”
He smirked. “I know that all too well.”
We chatted for a good fifteen minutes while waiting for a family of four, the last of the guests to arrive, before going outside to board the bus.
“Why don’t you all climb aboard and make yourself comfortable? I’ll go ahead and load the baggage in back.” Brian got right to it.
Layla exited from the driver’s side to assist him.
“Logan, it’s so good to see you.” She gave me a loving hug, in a sisterly fashion. “You look great as always.”
The three of us had known each other since we first started walking. I viewed the Addisons as family.
“As do you. You’re as beautiful as ever.”
She blushed and slapped my arm.
“You better not let Eddie hear you speak to her like that, even though you mean no harm by it,” Brian warned in his Southern drawl.
“Who’s Eddie?” I stood behind the van and assisted with the luggage. My guitar stayed firmly in my grasp. I would never let my baby get thrown on top of a pile of suitcases.
“My fiancé.” She flashed me her sparkly engagement ring.
“Well, I’ll be damned. Eddie’s a lucky guy.” I nodded in agreement with my sentiment.
We finished loading the suitcases and closed the back doors. Since I was the last guest to get in the van, I got the shit seat next to two teenagers. At least I had my headphones to tune them out if and when they began arguing with each other. We had about an hour and a half trek to the ranch.
The teen girl’s eyes lit up when I sat next to her, her mouth falling open.
“You’re Logan Trimble of Steam, aren’t you?” She slapped her hand over her mouth.
“In the flesh. And you are?” I offered my hand to shake hers.
She shook it straightaway. “Jordana. I’m a huge fan.” She blinked rapidly.
“It’s nice to meet you, Jordana.”
“It’s nice to meet you too.” She squirmed in her seat and accidentally hit her brother. He shoved her.
“Stop moving. I don’t have much room as it is.”
“Don’t mind him.” She brushed him off with her hand. “He’s my obnoxious brother, Camden.” She elbowed him in the ribs and gave him a dirty look.
“Keep your hands to yourself.” He pushed her again.
“Both of you, enough. It’s been a long trip, and I’m already tired of your arguing.” The father intervened.
Jordana’s cheeks flushed in embarrassment. She crossed her hands on her lap and bowed her head.
That was fun.
I retrieved my headphones from my backpack and tuned in to music on my phone. I had officially ended the meet-and-greet portion of the ride. Susanna would make introductions between the guests later at the welcome dinner, but she made it a point every year to respect my privacy by not mentioning my celebrity status directly. She kept it on the down low as much as possible and asked guests to refrain from taking photos of other guests unless given permission to do so. That rule she enacted on my behalf.
My stomach gurgled, which reminding me of Susanna’s cooking. She made everything from scratch. Her meals were better than any five-star restaurant I’d ever eaten at. I couldn’t wait to get there and eat up.
It was a long-ass, bumpy ride. Thank goodness by the time we arrived at the ranch the afternoon heat had begun to dissipate, bringing in some cooler air. Nights in the California Mountains required a sweatshirt, days T-shirts and shorts, the perfect balance of hot and cold.
Layla gave us a brief rundown of the schedule for the evening, then dropped each group off at their respective cabins, a schedule I had no intention of following other than the welcome dinner. S’mores at a bonfire with a bunch of families? Uh-uh. So not my thing. I pretty much kept to myself at the ranch, regrouping and playing music on the rocking chair in front of my cabin. It was something I cherished every year, along with participating in other solitary activities that helped ground me and keep me humble in a less chaotic world, one free from the paparazzi and hectic lifestyle I had become so accustomed to.
My duffle got placed on the luggage stand inside my cabin. Sure, there were dressers and a closet, but I preferred to live out of a suitcase, something I did often and did well. Besides, I didn’t want to waste any more time.
Holding my guitar case, I stepped outside onto the deck, where I sat my ass on the wood rocking chair. I unzipped the hard exterior and lifted my baby off the plush lining cradling it. I began to strum, tapping my foot and breathing in the fresh air.
Ah, it didn’t get better than this, the fucking life.
4
Drew
Talk about feeling grateful. Kate and I had a two-bedroom cabin. I didn’t understand why, since she and Joe were supposed to be honeymooning, but I had no complaints whatsoever. Hey, I was all for sharing, but sleeping next to my sister in a bed for a week? No, thank you. That was where I drew the line.
“Let’s go explore the grounds.” Kate stood in the doorway to my room, her excitement evident in her gestures and tone.
“I’d like to get settled first.” I unpacked my shorts and placed them in a dresser drawer; my mind zoning out and wondering if he’d ever stayed in this particular cabin with his parents.
Stop thinking about him.
How could I not, especially knowing my ex had slept in these very cabins during his many visits to the ranch?
Deeply, I exhaled, that all too familiar pain in my chest making its presence known.
“Get settled later. This place is gorgeous. Let’s go take a walk. Besides, dinner’s in an hour.”
“You go on ahead. I’m going to stay here and unpack. I’ll meet up with you at dinner.”
The words vital, crucial, and critical didn’t do a good job of describing my mind’s urgent longing for a break from Kate. She made me crazy. More importantly, my emotions were out of whack. I needed to get them in check.
She sighed in an obnoxious manner. “I hope you’re not going to isolate yourself in this room for the entire week.”
To reiterate, Kate made me crazy. Still, I bit my tongue. She knew damn well my ex used to vacation at this ranch and that it had to be difficult for me to be here. But then again, I had to keep in mind it was Kate I was dealing with, so she probably had no clue, and if she did, wouldn’t care less. I clenched my jaw, the condescending tone in her voice like nails scratching across a blackboard. Ugh. Both of them were horrible sounds to have to endure.
“We just got here. I want to unpack and get myself situated. Please, go take a walk and explore the grounds.” I beg of you. I s
hooed her away.
She huffed. “Fine. I’ll see you in an hour.”
She stormed down the hall. The screen door slammed behind her. Good riddance.
Finally, some peace and quiet. I plopped on the bed in relief. The plane ride had been anything but relaxing. I didn’t mean to sound unsympathetic to Kate’s situation. I honestly felt horrible about it, but my sister’s defense mechanism since birth had been to belittle me when she became upset, something I wanted no part of. Especially since I was currently dealing with my own troubled feelings. She had no concept of the word boundaries, knew nothing of them or how to respect them; therefore, my words of rebuttal when she spoke to me in a harsh tone went in one ear and out the other. Adios. Bye-bye.
After resting for a few minutes, I finished putting my clothes away. In the bathroom, I washed up and applied a touch of lip gloss and eyeliner. I had only packed a few essentials from my makeup stash because I had no intention of wearing much of it, figuring most of the activities I planned to participate in over the course of the week would be spent outdoors in the presence of families and couples. Need I say more?
Mmm, the great outdoors. I kicked rocks along the dirt road that led to the dining hall.
The soft sounds of a guitar being played caught my attention.
A guy sat on a rocking chair, his beautiful melody stopping me in my tracks. I closed my eyes, relishing the sound.
Wait a second.
The playing and chord structure sounded awfully familiar.
No way. It couldn’t be. What were the odds?
The shock at the likelihood hit me like a ton of bricks, the anticipation killing me. My heart now raced at the possibility of such a freakish coincidence. I wiped the back of my neck with my sweaty palm and tried to sneak a peek at the master musician, but the damn wooden columns which led from the railing to the overhang in front of his cabin hid his face.
The insanity taking place inside my brain kicked my nervous system into overdrive. I sighed at the absurdity of my thoughts. My ex had come here years ago as a teen with his family. Sure, he had probably returned for visits now and again, but with fifty-two weeks in a year, I couldn’t imagine the probability of running into him during my stay.
But then again, anything could happen, right?
I shivered at the mere thought.
Either way, the guy played magnificently, with brilliant precision. The soothing rhythm flooded me with memories of my ex. He had adored his guitar, possibly more than life itself.
Shit!
I stumbled, too wrapped up in my head to concentrate on the uneven path beneath me. At least I didn’t fall. Nor did I get the guy’s attention.
Thank God. I didn’t want a stranger seeing me topple over on my ass.
Upon arriving at the dining hall, I spotted Kate chatting with two women. I approached and politely waited for her to finish speaking before introducing myself.
She acknowledged me, smiling. “Drew, this is Erin and Jan.”
“It’s nice to meet you.” I greeted both women.
“They’re celebrating their five-year anniversary.” Kate beamed.
“Happy Anniversary.”
“Do you two want to join us for dinner?” Jan asked.
I wondered whether Kate had informed them we were sisters or if the women thought me and Kate were involved like they obviously were.
“Sure.”
My sister agreed on my behalf without giving me the opportunity to speak for myself. Not that I cared. If anything, with any luck, chatting with these ladies would distract her from her depressing thoughts about Joe and me from my nagging thoughts about my ex.
The four of us sat at a table, others gathering inside the open space. There were several tables set up, which could hold about eight diners each. I scanned the room, feeling curious about who we would be spending the next week with.
That was when he walked in.
And by he, I was referring to the most gorgeous man I had ever laid my eyes on, that being the ex I couldn’t stop obsessing over since I’d left for this trip, Logan Trimble, in the flesh.
Air. I was desperate for more of it. The extra oxygen from deep breathing did nothing to satisfy my lungs. It felt like I was dying a slow death. I sucked in another mouthful.
With my elbows leaning on the table, I buried my face in my hands. I had to get the hell out of the room. A feeling of suffocation overtook me, the walls closing in on me.
When I took a sneak peek around me, I discovered Kate staring at me, her brows furrowed.
Think… Think… Think…
“I have to use the restroom.” A good excuse, albeit the total understatement of the century. “Please excuse me.” I eased my chair back and rose, making sure not to face him. I dashed to the exit.
Once outside on the deck, I tried to calm myself but quickly discovered slow breathing wasn’t helping. Nor did watching the Addisons’ dogs, who waited by the exit to the dining hall, in the hopes of getting leftovers from guests. My stomach understood their desire for food.
My hands—and my body—trembled out of control. This couldn’t be happening. I wasn’t in the right mindset for the showdown which would invariably take place between me and Logan. I’d given that man my heart, for years, and in return, he cheated on me, the asshole.
The disgusting image of the event, the one when I walked in on him and that bimbo getting hot and heavy at his friend and bandmate, Joey Fine’s house, caused me to scowl.
Back and forth, I paced on the deck, thinking maybe moving would help stop the jitters. If only.
Of all the places Logan could be, he had to visit the ranch now? While Kate and I were here? I wanted to slap myself just to convince myself I was truly awake, at the total irony of it all.
Switching things up, I stopped the pacing and rocked instead, almost like a psych patient would, trying to bring some sense of inner calm. For all intents and purposes, my present situation could almost be described as sheer insanity.
Ooh, a rocking chair.
I contemplated sitting on the old wooden thing. The only thing missing: a touch of eerie music in the background to go along with the lunacy taking place in my mind and body. That would totally enhance this scenario. Yup. I could definitely pass as certifiable.
My stomach grumbled, hungry. I made small circles over it. Yeah, that will satisfy the emptiness in it. But I couldn’t go back inside, not ready to face him yet. No way, no how. If I could at all. Ugh! I buried my face in my hands. This royally sucked.
Maybe the ranch offered room service. Nah, probably not. The place wasn’t a resort in any sense of the word. It housed private cabins with full kitchens. A great option, right? Nope. Not in my case because I had no food to prepare in mine.
Wait a second. The owners had left a small basket of treats on our kitchen table. That could work in my favor. Hmm, how many granola bars would it take to provide me with enough nutrition to sustain me for the next few days, so I could remain in isolation? Kate’s stupid reprimand, not mine. Now I had a justifiable reason to not spend every waking moment with her on this trip. Woohoo! Let’s hear it for positive thinking.
Anxiety fueled me as I grasped the full impact of my situation. Logan Trimble was here. He was here! And so was I. Fuck!
Hold on. This was absurd. I mean, come on. I couldn’t hide from him all week. Sooner or later, he would see me. So why postpone the inevitable? Besides, why should I be the one in hiding? He should. Mr. Guilty Party.
My heart racing, I put my big girl pants on and walked over to the screen door. The problem was I didn’t feel so big right now, self-consciousness consumed me.
How do I look?
Is my make up still in place?
Let him eat his heart out.
Wait, is my hair a mess?
More importantly, does this ranch have medics in case I suffer heart failure?
With my heart’s current state of overdrive, there was an actual possibility for some myocardial mayhem.
Anger suddenly filled me. Why did I still allow him to affect me so profusely and give him so much power over me?
Like I have a choice in the matter, a small voice said.
Shit, now my own thoughts betrayed me too.
On a five count, I inhaled and exhaled, trying to regain my focus.
Maybe he won’t recognize me.
Yes! The thought totally uplifted my spirits. My hair had been shorter back in the day.
Who was I kidding? I rolled my eyes at my brain’s poor attempt at trying to come up with an excuse to save me from this hell.
With one final deep breath, I opened the door and stepped inside.
Whew. I couldn’t have picked a better time to enter. Susanna rang a small bell in front of the room to gather the group’s attention. Her husband, Jack, stood by her side. Everyone focused on them which gave me the opportunity to slide in unnoticed and grab a chair in the back of the room. The buffet, though, being located behind Susanna, meant I couldn’t get to it from here. Darn it! Eating would have to wait. My stomach growled in protest.
“Welcome to the Addison Family Ranch. We’re so happy to have you here with us for the next week. I hope everyone’s had a chance to meet one other. And if not, don’t worry. After dinner we’re hosting a bonfire, where we’ll make introductions. There will be plenty of opportunities to make new and hopefully lifelong friends during the course of your stay. As an aside, we encourage you to capture as many memories as you can on your cameras and on video, but we ask that you please respect the privacy of other guests and not take pictures or videos of others without prior consent.”
Her gaze flicked to Logan. Yup, he had certainly made something of himself over the years. Had I?
“Every night we will post the schedule for the next day’s activities right here.” She pointed to a large white dry-erase board mounted on a wall. I didn’t bother to read it. My interest remained fixed on the back of Logan’s head, his hair still shaggy and yes, still beautiful.