“Stop the questions. Go get your parents.” She shushes me.
I am stunned by her rudeness. Then I see the younger one sizing me with a grin. It bothers me even more. He looks at me like I am a piece of meat in the meat market.
I turn around and walk out of front yard. I need to get my neighbors.
But I don’t hear anything when I knock on their door. So I walk back slowly, thinking about how to get rid of them.
“Hey” I hear a sound and see Huo Qubing is waiting for me by the door in front of my house.
I give him a hush signal and wave him to come to me. He quickly glances inside the house and then walks towards me.
As soon as he passes the opened door, I grab his hand and we run to the corner behind the wall.
“You need to help me.” I tell him in a hurry. “My parents are not home. There are two strangers there. They are very rude. Would you please help me get rid of them?”
“Do you know who they are?” He asks me.
“No, I don’t know. They would not tell me.”
“Did they say what they are here for?” He asks me again.
“They did not say anything. They just walked in and ask me to get my parents.”
“Did you tell them your parents are not home?”
“I did not. I don’t want them know I am home alone.”
He gives me a look of approval. “That is smart. Let‘s go find out.”
He leads the way back home.
“Excuse me,” Huo says. “Shiaonu’s parents are not available right now. Could you please tell me who you are and why are you here for?”
The woman quickly scans Huo while eating a steamed bun. She must have gone to kitchen and searched the cupboard.
Maybe it is Huo’s uniform, or maybe it’s his indifferent attitude, the woman puts down the bun she was eating, stands up and answers Huo.
“We are here to see Zhao family. I am Mrs. Huang and this is my son. And who are you?”
“It doesn’t matter who I am. I am watching over her while her parents are not here.” I almost laugh. His attitude is no better than theirs.
“If you are not part of the family, then there is none of your business anymore.” Mrs. Huang is crossed. “After all, we are the family, or going to be.”
What the heck!
“What do you mean?” Huo asks calmly.
“My son has a wedding contract with Zhao’s daughter.” She drops the bomb.
I feel a truck just hit me. I have already heard a lot about arranged marriage. But I have never thought it would happen to me. Nobody ever mentioned anything to me.
“Still, what are you here for?” Huo insists. I give him a quick look. His face expression has not changed a bit since we came in.
“Just like I said, if you are not family, then it’s none of your business.” The woman raises her voice.
“I would not be so sure.” Huo quietly states. “If you don’t want to let me know. Then you need to come back in another time when her parents are here.”
“Oh really?” Mrs. Huang snorts. “Do you think I will leave my future daughter-in-law alone with a stranger like you? Or you two have done this sort of things already?”
Wow, what a shrew.
Again I glance at Huo, trying to see if there is going to be a crack on his face. I find none.
“You should leave now.” He is still calm. “One way or another.”
I suddenly want to give him a big hug. I have always been bothered by his expressionless and indifference attitude. But it is just perfect right now.
“I dare you.” Mrs. Huang is absolutely mad now. She points her finger in front of Huo. “What a scambag! You think I will be scared of you? I have taken care of bastard like you even before you knew you are a bastard.”
Nothing can piss Huo more than calling him a bastard. Although he has never said anything to me, but I knew from history book that Huo himself is a pre-marital illegitimate kid.
Before I can blink my eyes, Huo has already grabbed Mrs. Huang one arm, twisted behind her, lifted her up, walked towards the front door and threw her out.
Quite fluent, I have to say.
“Should you leave by yourself, or should I make you?” Huo comes back and turns to the young guy, who is apparently in the state of shock.
He stands up, tries to say something to Huo, then decides to turn to me.
“You should feel ashamed on what you have done!” He says it in a deliberate ferocious tone.
I find it funny instead of being threatened.
Huo and I watch him walking out and helping Mrs. Huang stand up. Mrs. Huang looks like in a lots of pain, she whine loud. But she did not turn back or say anything.
We stand there watching them getting on their horse carriage and riding away.
“How come you are home alone?” He asks me.
“My parents are in Chang’an preparing for the store opening. My older brother is still working in blacksmith shop and my younger brother is in training camp. Do you know he is going to be just like you?”
He rolls his eyes on me. “Of course I know. I helped him to be the imperial guard and he has been trained by me.”
“Really? Why? Is he alright there? I hope you did not give him a hard time.” I ask a lot of questions at the same time.
“I had thought he should be in similar if not better physical condition as you. But he is in such a bad shape. He cannot run. He cannot follow directions. He cannot remember the martial art moves we teach. But he is a terrific rider. Actually he is one of the best riders we have.”
I ask him to sit down on the platform where Mrs. Huang and her son was. Removing the bowls and leftovers on the table, I bring out a cup of mums tea and some steamed buns for him.
“Please have some steamed buns.” I put down the food and tea. “Did Ponu tell you how come he can ride horse so well?” I never knew Ponu can ride horse.
“No. He did not.” He shakes his head. Then he asks me. “Why do you keep sending me the food?”
My face blush. “I just thought maybe you won’t be mad at me anymore.”
“When was I mad at you?” He looks surprised.
“Didn’t you call me a liar when General Wei was here?”
“Oh…” He pauses. “First, you misguided me to a different house, which I can understand for the safety reason. But that day you said the reason you were crying is because he likes your food. But I can tell that was not true.”
“Then what do you think it was?”
He doesn’t answer me until he finishes one steamed bun. “I have seen too many young girls drooling around my uncle.”
I hide my burning face behind my two hands. “Was I that obvious?”
“Worse.” He says. “At least others know how to hide their hots a little. You just shameless stared at my uncle, then cried and laughed in front of everybody.”
With my hands still covering my face, I shake my head. “You got it all wrong. I am not like that. “
I put down my hands and stare at him in his eyes. “Imagine you know a hero all your life, but never thought it’s possible to meet him. And then one day, not only you met him in person, he also liked your cooking.”
He shakes his head. “I cannot imagine that.”
“You don’t have any hero you admire all your life?” I ask.
“No.” He says. “My uncle is pretty amazing. So is the Emperor. ”
“How about…” I tried to think of some great General in history who is ahead of this time. But I can think of none. I get frustrated. “Actually your uncle is better than others. And you are good too.”
He is taking the third bun. “I am just a guard. Hopefully someday, I will lead the troops and fight with Xiongnu.”
I smile. “I am sure you will be as awesome as General Wei. Actually I believe you will be even better.”
“I hope so too.” He nods. “Do you have more steamed buns?”
I laugh. “You did not have dinner?”
&n
bsp; “No, I was on the way back to Chang’an and thought I would stop here to see if you have any food to take to Ponu.”
“Do you eat lamb?” I ask him.
“Yes, I love lamb.”
“Let me make something really quick for you.” I walk to kitchen. Take a large piece the dough out underneath a wet towel and roll them into two thin and flat piece.
“What are you making?” he follows me into kitchen.
“Do you know how to light a fire in the stove?” I ask him.
“Yes.”
“Would you please do it?”
He does not say anything, but start working on the fire for stove.
“I am making a dish I call it Lamb Bingzi.” I have some minced lamb. I was planning to experiment steamed bun with lamb. But now Huo is here. I decide to cook it all for him. I spread the lamb evenly on a piece of flat dough, I then add chopped green onion, salt and some cumin, and then cover it with another piece of flat dough.
“If we have some cheese, it will be perfect. “ I say.
“You eat cheese? That’s Xiongnu’s food.” He looks disgusted. Nobody eats cheese in Han. The smell of cheese drives everyone away.
“I crave for cheese, milk, butter.” And coffee, coke….
He looks at me strangely.
“Where did you learn to eat Xiongnu’s food? No, I don’t even want to know.” He says. “As weird as you are, you probably will try anything.”
I laugh. “That kind of weirdness is good one, just like I am also a good-hearted liar.”
He laughs then he asks me. “What are you going to do with your fiancée?”
Ugh… I have almost forgotten about it. “That’s not going to happen. “ I say to him. “This whole arranged marriage thing is really weird. How can you imagine two strangers going to bed together like that?”
Oops. I should not saying anything about bed.
“Please cross the last one out.” I find him uneasy on my bluntness. I can’t help myself but making a comment. “Oh, Your ancient people. You allow such outrageous thing to happen in real life, but you will not tolerate it to be spoken. Even Emperor Wu knew I am a vulgar person. So if you want to be my friend, you need to forgive me for my bluntness, openness, and most importantly, weirdness.”
I start giggling.
“Anything else you think is weird with us ancient people?” He asks. His monotonous tone alerts me.
“It might be weird to me, just like you think I am weird too. We are just different.” I become cautious on what I say.
“A marriage without blessings from their families is a doomed one. “ His voice turns stern. “If a woman doesn’t mind her name, she is not a worthy one. “
I sigh. What am I doing? I see the picture of hitting eggs, my head, on the rock, Huo.
“I guess you don’t want to be my friend.”
“I don’t care for friends.” He turns and walks out the kitchen.
I stay behind until I hear him getting on his horse and ride away.
8 number thirteen
I stand on the street of Chang’an, lost and miserable.
It should have been a cool and beautiful fall. But sweat is running on my back and on my face. I have to wear my wooden clogs and my layered long Hanfu. I have been ordered by Papa to only wear wooden clogs and formal Hanfu since we move to Chang’an. He said people here judge you by your look. But my dress, Hanfu, although long and elegant, makes me feel like a piece of twinkle wrapped in bacon and been slow fried over a pan. I am hot and unbreathable. My breast, which has been tender recently, has been wrapped tightly by Niang with a long piece of cloth. I start to understand why women here have such a dainty, almost flat breast. The arch of my feet is also sore. So is the space between my first and second toe, where the girth lays.
I pull my handkerchief out from my sleeve pocket. It is the only handkerchief I made: a square light green silk, embroidered with a couple of bamboo leaves. I wipe my face and remember the conversation I had with my parents.
It did not go very well, especially with my Papa. Honestly, it went terribly wrong. After I told them about the visit from Mrs. Huang and her son, they immediately took the side of Huang. I do not think I did anything wrong. But Papa scolded me anyway for my misbehavior in front of my future mother-in-law.
“I did not do anything wrong.” I protested. “She was really rude.”
“Hush.” Papa said sternly. “You should never complain about your elders, especially your mother-in-law. All you should do is to respect her, follow her orders and make her happy.”
“Even when she is wrong?”
“Yes, even when she is wrong.” Papa confirms. “It’s not up to you to judge. Your behavior should match with filial piety. Don’t bring shame to our family like this.”
I did not expect it’s this serious. “I did not know anything about marriage contract. They just showed up without telling me who they were and what they were there for. I was home alone, how would I know what to expect. As for the marriage contract, can we cancel it? “
Papa turned to angry. He pointed his finger to me and said to my mother. “How did you teach her behave like this: no respect to elders, no consideration for the family, and now, she even wants to cancel her marriage contract?”
I really don’t understand how my simple and reasonable request turned into such a horrendous accusation. Recently I have been doing very well pushing other’s buttons.
“Why can’t we?” I insisted. “Mrs. Huang behaves like a mean and evil witch and her son is a wimp. You really want me to marry into a family like this?”
Papa’s face was red by then. I was afraid that he might have a heart-attack. “Papa, why don’t you sit down? We can talk about this some other time.”
“There is no need to talk further on this. “ Papa shouted. “Your marriage contract has been signed by your grandfather. It has been documented officially. There is no way we can back it out. And for you, you are grounded. We have spoiled you so much that you behave so erratically. From now on, you are forbidden to get out of the front door. You mother will teach you how to be a good wife. You need to stay inside to reflect your mistakes.” He then stormed out the room.
Later that day, Niang came to my room.
“Shiaonu.” She said to me “Don’t be mad at your Papa for what he said. We owed Huang family a lot. The year when you were born, we had a plague of locusts. It has destroyed all our crops just before harvesting. We did not have any savings, so your grandfather went to see his friend Old Mr. Huang and borrowed some money to carry us through. After the harvesting next year, in order to show our gratification and to return the money, our whole family went to visit them, including you, still in diapers. When old Mrs. Huang laid eyes on you, she immediately liked you and believed you are going to be a very fortunate girl. So she suggested a marriage between you and her grandson, which was four years old at that time. Your grandparents and Old Mr. Huang agreed with her. We signed the marriage contract, exchanged engagement gifts and registered with civil office.”
I sighed. I am sure Old Mr. and Mrs. Huang were very nice people. Lending the money to others in a bad year says a lot about their generosity and their integrity. There is really no evil spirit for anything they did.
“But Niang,” I still tried to persuade her. “I don’t want to marry him. I don’t like him, even less on his mother. By now, I am sure they don’t like me either. Why should I step into a marriage with such a tension?”
Niang sighed too. “Shiaonu, we will never propose the cancellation of the engagement. However if they do that, I will try to convince your Papa to agree. But you know, a girl with the history of cancelled engagement will have a very tough time finding her next suitor, especially you are approaching fifteen years of age. “
“Being fifteen is still a child.” I protested.
Niang shook her head. “By law, every girl should get married by age fifteen. Otherwise, the family will be fined five times of their tax payment.”
>
I was stunned.
“How come? Why do girls have to get married by fifteen?”
“I don’t know. But that’s the law. Women have to get married by age fifteen after Hairpin Ceremony. Men have to get married no later than age twenty.” She then tried to make me feel better. “Well, you won’t turn into fifteen until next March and we will have the hairpin ceremony at the same time. So any time after hairpin ceremony next year, it will be fine for you to get married.”
“As if that is a consolation.” I murmured.
She continued. “I will suggest to Huang sometime in the fall, when we have enough time to get dowry ready.”
The very next day, my parents packed my stuff and moved me with them into our new home in Chang’an. All of our animals are now taken cared by Jinu, who quit his apprenticeship in blacksmith shop and travels back and forth between our old and new homes. He started working for our family business full time.
Papa and Jinu also paid a visit to Huangs and brought with them lots of gifts. They promised to Huangs that they would teach me to be the obedient daughter in law.
Niang has been teaching me how to weave, how to make clothes and how to embroider. I have no interests in any of these. But I cannot do anything else. They won’t even allow me to step into the front store.
The living quarter where we live now is actually one of two living courts behind the store. The front court, right connected to front store, has been used for storage and boarding rooms for the hired workers. We live in the rear quarter, where it is centered with a courtyard just like the front court, and is surrounded by rooms on four sides.
I took one room in east side, Jinu took one next to me. Niang and Papa took the main bedroom. We left a room in west side for Ponu, who is still out in training camp. Other rooms on west side are kitchen and bathroom.
Honestly, we cannot afford such an expansive living, even with the gold ingots from General Wei and Emperor Wu. Papa told me this property actually belongs to General Wei. Over the years, Emperor Wu has rewarded General Wei lots of gold, properties and manors. He probably is not aware how much he really owns. His house manager manages them for him. So when General Wei asked his house manager to find us a place, he just brought us into this one. The terms of lease favored us tremendously.
My Soul is in the Sky Page 7