by Clare London
Claudio came straight over and shook both Dom’s and Zeb’s hands. “Thank you for seeking our sponsorship,” he said. “I think you’ll find the new season’s range very exciting, and perfect for your Eiger expedition.”
Felix was slower to offer his hand. “I’ll be honest, we weren’t sure at first whether to consider you.” He stared rather suspiciously at Dom. “It’s extremely important to us that any of our ambassadors share our principles of respect and inclusivity. You’re a man of great ability and drive, but you haven’t always been a favorite of the media.”
“That’s got nothing to do with my respect for the bloody clothes.” Dom tried to hold back the snap in his voice, he really did, despite Tanya kicking him in the ankle. “I’ve always admired your product’s commitment to both quality and utility.” Wasn’t that what was really important? But he took several judicious steps away from Tanya so he was out of her reach.
“You weren’t out to the media before now either, were you?”
Good grief. “As I’ve said before, I never hid it. It’s not always a political issue, and I’ve definitely never used it as such. It’s just what I am.” Was Tanya brushing dirt from her eye or threatening to weep? Damned if he was going to be anything other than frank. “But neither have I avoided the most ridiculous and offensive attention from that media while I’m out with another man who happens to be gay. I think I’ve done my apprenticeship.” Yes, Tanya was definitely on the verge of tears. He was sorry for that, at least.
But Claudio was still smiling. “Felix is very possessive of the company’s reputation, as of course we all are. But it’s okay, we know your personal views and we respect you for them. Our decisions should be only about the clothes, I know, and being gay—or not—shouldn’t be an issue in choosing who will promote them. But it still matters to us, where we can promote that as well. At the end of the day, we’re thrilled that you’re comfortable with it, and have also established a high-profile career that we can support.”
“Dom’s totally committed to this expedition,” Tanya said. “And to your company’s support.”
“We’re offering a substantial amount of money,” Felix said dryly. “That’s bound to inspire commitment.”
“Shut up, you old cynic.” Claudio shook his head fondly at his partner. Maybe this was regular banter between them. “I think it’s more than that, isn’t it, Dom?”
Dom was about to respond again when, to his astonishment, Zeb stepped up beside him and slipped his arm into Dom’s.
“Yes,” Zeb said quietly. “It’s the most important climb of Dominic’s life. It’s just as important to him that he shares it with people who care that much about their own work.” And he smiled up at Dom as if it were the most natural thing in the world to be at his side.
“There you are, Felix,” Claudio said gently. “And that’s what really matters.”
WHILE Tanya and Dominic worked through some details with Felix at the board table, Aidan wandered over to the coffee and refreshments. Aidan’s mouth watered at the spread on offer, but didn’t think a supermodel like Zeb Z would be gorging on baked goods and cookies at the first opportunity. More’s the pity.
After a few minutes, Claudio came to join him. “I’ve seen your work, Zeb. You were in our swimwear campaign last year, of course.”
Aidan tensed with sudden horror. They know Zeb…?
“Though it was unfortunate we never got to meet you in person,” Claudio continued. “I can’t even remember where we were that month, we travel so often during the year. But we both think you’re very good.”
“Thanks. That’s kind of you.” Aidan swallowed hard with relief. He had to avoid exposure for a while longer. Dominic needs this deal.
Claudio helped himself to a large espresso, a couple of pastries, and four large chocolate chip cookies. Aidan was torn between rabid jealousy and amazement that Claudio kept a figure like his on so many calories. God, now he was starting to think like Zeb.
“How long have you and Dom been together?” Claudio asked between mouthfuls.
“We’re… it’s all rather new. At the moment we’re just…. Well, you know how it is.”
Claudio laughed and brushed some fallen crumbs out of his goatee. He seemed to be constantly happy, and it was infectious. “Yes, I do. He’s very handsome, and full of those alpha vibes. A gruff old bear, though, isn’t he?”
“Not so gruff once you know him. And not so old either,” Aidan said swiftly, defensively. “There’s less than ten years between us.”
Claudio nodded, his eyes sparkling. Aidan felt he was being undressed in a whole different way than in the studio session. “That exploit with the photographer, though. It concerned us for a while, especially Felix. He hates controversy.”
“Oh God, yes. I was afraid that wouldn’t look good from your point of view. Dominic felt really bad about it. He didn’t mean to hit him so hard.”
Claudio raised his eyebrows. “Really?”
Aidan opened his mouth to protest again but couldn’t stop the chuckle that escaped. “Well, he wasn’t that repentant.”
Surprisingly Claudio laughed too. “That’s fine by us. I mean, we can’t condone violence, of course, but there was enough video going around the Net to show how offensively that idiot had behaved. As a company we like to be associated with strong and sympathetic characters like Dom. And of course there was the jacket—that was a big bonus.”
“The jacket?”
“Neither of you realized?” Claudio laughed again. “Dom was wearing one of our jackets that day. It’s very flattering—and extra validation—that he’d chosen it personally, rather than as part of this campaign.” He glanced away, distracted by his partner waving him over. “I think we’re about to sign off on the finance, Zeb. It’s been a pleasure meeting you. And you appear to have been a good influence on Dom.”
Aidan was left to think that over while the board table was strewn with papers. The main agreement seemed to have been copied a huge number of times. Dom scowled every time he was asked to sign something yet again, and Tanya kept her arm around Eric’s shoulders as if to keep both his and her excitement in check.
For the moment Aidan was forgotten and was just a spectator. He watched them as if from another planet. This was Dominic’s deal, his future, his dream come true. Aidan had just been part of the game, a temporary distraction. None of it had been real.
Or had it? He recalled Dominic’s touch in the early hours of the morning; his fierce kisses; his warm, furred body under Aidan’s; his knees gripping Aidan’s hips; his desperate, sensual, and sexual need for Aidan.
But all that had been for Zeb, hadn’t it? Not Aidan. Dominic believed him to be Zeb, even in the dark, deep night, with laughs and moans and the thrust of desire between them, when anyone else would have been at their most vulnerable, and their most honest. Aidan didn’t think he had the courage to reveal the truth to anyone, let alone to Dominic.
Judging from the sudden wave of loneliness and depression threatening to creep over him, he wondered if it even mattered anymore.
Chapter Twenty-Four
AIDAN watched as Tanya left the room to escort Claudio and Felix out of the building. Eric bounded over to the refreshments to scoop up some of the remaining pastries. Dominic was left standing by the board table, looking slightly stunned.
I should go to him. Talk to him.
He wandered over to the table and put a hand on Dominic’s arm to attract his attention. “It went well? As you hoped?” He felt oddly nervous.
“Even better,” Dominic replied in some awe. “They’re financing a large part of the expedition, plus providing all the gear we need. For the whole team. And they’ve offered to promote my photographs in their stores on my return. It’s a marvelous result.”
“Marvelous,” Aidan echoed.
Dominic turned his head sharply to stare at him. But before he could say anything more, Tanya returned, grinning and clapping her hands.
“T
hat’s it, then. Well done, everybody! We did it!”
“Did what?” Aidan was startled.
“The deal is done.” Tanya gave a soft laugh. “The promotion is over. You no longer have to date this gruff old grump for the money.”
“Less of the old,” Dominic said. His tone confirmed the gruff description, but the expression in his eyes wasn’t grumpy. It was more like confusion.
Tanya turned to Aidan and gave him a genuinely warm hug. “Thank you for all your efforts.”
“It was a pleasure.” What else could he say? “Do We Will Survive expect us to continue as a couple?”
Tanya was supervising Eric, who was struggling to open a bottle of champagne. “I don’t know, to be honest. I think the deal is done regardless. They can’t legislate who will date whom, can they?”
“Of course not,” Aidan said faintly, though that had already been done to him, hadn’t it? However eagerly he’d finally gone along with it.
“You were invaluable, Zeb. Thank you for softening up my old bear and showing him in a more accessible light to the public.”
“Somewhat,” Eric murmured, with a wink at Aidan. “There are rough edges to Dom that will never be smoothed, I reckon. Am I right?”
Aidan just stared at him until Eric frowned and looked away.
“Anyway,” Tanya continued. She showed no sign of noticing any tension in the room. “I’m sure you two can work on your exit strategy while Dom’s away.”
“Exit strategy?” Dominic growled.
“Away?” Aidan asked.
They both spoke at the same time.
Eric chose to reply to Aidan. “Dom’s plans are all set for the expedition.” His face was red from his ongoing battle with the cork. “It’s all gone perfectly to plan. I’m really pleased for you, Dom, you grumpy old git.”
Dominic still looked a little stunned. He grabbed the bottle from Eric, gave it a sharp twist, and the cork popped out with maximum effect but minimum mess. “Exit strategy?” he repeated doggedly.
Tanya smiled winningly at him, while holding her glass out for the celebration drink. “Well, yes. I mean, you don’t have to suffer the socializing now. You can get back up your precious mountains. You and Zeb as a couple obviously won’t continue.”
“Obviously,” Aidan echoed. He didn’t dare look at Dominic. “I’ll get some water, if that’s all right.”
While he fumbled over at the refreshments, trying to keep the water jug from wobbling in his hands, he felt someone approach from behind him. Dominic.
“Thanks for the support,” Dominic said quietly to him. “Just then, when Felix was on my back.”
“Of course. I mean, no problem.” Aidan took a quick sip of his water. The glass was slippery from where he’d spilled some of it over his hand. “All part of the service.”
“Sorry?”
Aidan felt as if he were sliding down the muddy sides of a pothole, down and down, farther into mess and misery. Yet he couldn’t keep his stupid mouth shut. “My job. To make sure you gave a good impression.”
Dominic was silent for a long moment. “I suppose I needed all the help I could get.”
“No,” Aidan snapped. “No, you didn’t. You’re fine as you are. And it wasn’t just because of that.”
“I’m glad to hear it.” Dom looked pained. “I think.”
“I mean—”
Dom put his hand on Aidan’s arm. “Don’t say any more. It’s not necessary. I know what you mean.”
But did he? And did he even care? Aidan felt wretched. “So, as Tanya said, the plans are all in place for the trip.”
“Yes. I’ll be flying out to Switzerland soon. Next Monday we start training and acclimatization in Chamonix, and then we’ll do the Eiger climb over the course of three days.”
Aidan’s heart plummeted. Next Monday? That was only four days ahead. “Chamonix?”
“That’s where we make our training climbs, meet the guides, establish the best approach for the current conditions. Just preclimbing fitness stuff, you know.”
Aidan didn’t. “More fabulous scenery, I assume?”
Dominic smiled eagerly. “My God, yes.” There was a light in his eyes that Aidan had only ever seen when he talked about the mountains. “The rock face is steep and the ice solid in parts. But it’s spectacular! Scrambling over the rock with an ice pick and crampons—it’s totally exhilarating. It’s critical to keep ourselves well hydrated and regulate our temperatures. We’ll be carrying heavy packs.” He focused back on Aidan, his eyes still shining. “It’d be fantastic to walk some of the peaks with you. There are smaller, easier climbs in Chamonix’s Triangle du Tacul, or we could train you up on the Scottish Grade 6 pitches first. I’d love to show you….” His words tailed off. The light in his face seemed to fade. “Anyway, you’re not interested in all this now.”
God, did that hurt. Aidan just managed to nod tightly. “Of course, I understand. I’d still like…. I’ll be following your progress—”
“On the television? Yes, I expect they’ll have reporters even out there. They’ll have a bloody livestream strapped to my nose if they have their way.”
“And branded with We Will Survive’s logo,” Aidan added. They laughed awkwardly, and then silence fell again. “And when you get back?”
“Well, I’m sure we’ll see each other then. Won’t we?” The carefully neutral look on Dominic’s face was as painful as if he’d been scowling.
“I suppose so. We’d better not stop being friends just like that. Though sometimes I think the press enjoy the romantic fights more than—”
“The happy endings, yes.” Dominic seemed to tense up beside him, and not in a comfortable way. How could they feel so far apart when that very morning they’d been so close? Dominic added, “Being friends, you said?”
Aidan nodded. That was so far away from what he really wanted that he didn’t trust himself to speak.
“Fine,” he heard Dominic say, from what felt like a long distance. “Well, I’d better check in with Tanya before she gets too pissed to make arrangements for my money.” He paused for another moment. “Thanks,” he said softly. Then he turned away to join the rest of his team.
Was that comment based in anger, disappointment, or genuine care? Aidan didn’t know.
He didn’t think he dared find out.
AIDAN insisted on getting a cab home, even though Eric offered to drive him. He’d so far managed to keep Dominic and his team away from where he lived, and he didn’t want that part of the deception exposed. Also, he couldn’t face one more minute with Dominic or his wonderful success. The man he adored every second with had become someone whose presence caused such pain that Aidan just wanted to get home and nurse his wounds in private.
As he stood on the curb waiting to hail a cab, his phone rang. At the sight of Zeb’s number, he darted in under a café awning and answered the call. “Hi. How are things going?”
“Hi, bro. Things are good, that’s why I’m calling. We’re coming back in a week or so.”
“That’s great.” Even Aidan could hear how his flat tone didn’t match the words. “How’s Lukas?”
“Lukas is fine. The surgery went well.”
“Surgery? Jesus, you never said anything about—”
“Look, he wouldn’t let me tell anyone.” Zeb’s voice was tight. “And it seems he hasn’t been honest about his symptoms before now. He was at potential danger stage before anyone knew. Anyway, we caught it early, and it was a minor operation, but he’s been restricted to bed rest for the time being and has promised to continue to recover at home. But are you okay?”
“Me?” Aidan was startled. “Yes, of course I am. Just send him my regards, and I hope you both get back here soon.”
“He really appreciates you holding the fort, Ade. We both do.”
Aidan wondered if Zeb realized the note of loving protectiveness that crept into his voice on the word “we.” Normally he would have teased Zeb about it, but… maybe not now.
A decent love affair for Zeb was long overdue. For us all, unfortunately.
“It’s good to talk to you, Ade.” Zeb laughed. He sounded more like his usual self. “I miss you.”
“Ditto.”
“And how’s it going with H-G?”
Aidan glanced around at the other café patrons, just in case one of them got bored with their cappuccino and decided to listen in. But then… what did it matter now? “Fine.”
“He hasn’t been too much of a bully?”
“No. Not at all. And I don’t think you should call him H-G any longer.”
“Wow. Who’s that assertive new guy and what did you do with my brother Aidan?”
“Ha-bloody-ha. Maybe acting the part of the outrageous supermodel is rubbing off on me.”
Zeb laughed again. “About time, I’d say.”
“Well, it’s partly due to being with Dominic as well. He slips into Mr. Aggressive mode too easily, so I have to keep an eye on that.” There was a brief moment of silence, when Aidan cursed the fact—too late to do anything about it—that he’d let slip too much passion in that statement. Zeb knew him as well as Aidan knew Zeb. “I mean, someone has to,” he added lamely.
“Ade?”
“Anyway, it’s all over now. He has his deal, he’s off up the Eiger, and I… you’re off the hook.”
“Bro—”
“And to be honest,” Aidan gabbled on, trying perhaps to cover up his lapse into overfamiliarity with Dominic. “I’m not that keen on this ‘bro’ thing all the time, you know? It’s like we’re in a buddy movie, and that’s not really us. Not me, anyway. I’d prefer you just call me by my name.”
There was a small but pregnant silence before Zeb spoke again. “Oh, Ade. Have you fallen for him?”
Another silence. Yes, Zeb had read the emotion beneath the random words all too well. Once again Aidan didn’t trust himself to speak.
“Oh fuck,” Zeb said cheerfully.
“Yes,” Aidan said miserably, “I know.”