by J B Heller
CHAPTER THREE
I’d been in a shit mood since leaving the library on Saturday. I wanted to go back the next day, but it wasn’t open on Sundays. So I was gunning for Monday, but work all of a sudden decided to get busy and fuck with my plans. It’s now Friday afternoon and I still haven’t been able to go back to the library and woo my future wife into actually liking me.
“What’s up your arse? You’ve been a moody prick all week.” Kai said whacking me in the back of the head on his way past my desk.
“Fuck off, wanker.”
He stopped dead in his tracks and slowly turned on his heels, his eyes narrowed in on me and turned to slits as he eyed me with suspicion. “Axel, what’s going on?”
I stiffened, “Nothing.”
“I call bullshit.” He closed the distance between him and my desk and braced his hands on the edge, “Is it a case?”
I shook my head, “I don’t know what you’re talking about. I’m fine, good as fucking gold.”
Kai raised a brow, “You always throw in a few extra fucks when you’re lying.”
My hand shot to my chest in mock horror, “I do not! Fuck just so happens to be one of my favourite fucking words.”
“Mine too, but that’s not what this is.” He continued to watch me for a moment before realisation filled his eyes, he shot up straight and pointed at me, “It’s a woman!”
There was no real point in lying, we find shit out for a living. I was just trying to prolong the ball busting. I slumped back in my seat, and threw my hands in the air, “Yes, are you happy now? It’s a fucking woman. And she hates me.”
His face brightened with a shit-eating grin, “Gabe!” he yelled.
I shot to my feet, “What are you doing? Shut the fuck up!”
Before I could round my desk to shut him up myself he hollered again, “Gabe, Axel has a crush!!!!!!”
Gabe burst out of his office like it was on fire, “Our baby boy is growing up.” he declared.
I flipped them both the bird and grabbed my jacket from the back of my chair, fished my keys from my pocket and started for the door. I didn’t make it three feet before they were on me.
They had me pinned to the ground with my arms behind my back in seconds. Gabe straddled me holding me in place while Kai crouched down in front of me, “So, what’s her name?” he asked in what I’m assuming was his attempt at a chick’s voice.
“I’m not talking, and you can’t make me!” I spat. Then it began, Gabe started to tickle me, and like the little bitch I was, I cried, “Mercy!” He stopped his assault immediately, allowing me to catch my breath for a moment before he demanded answers.
“You can get your fat arse off me first if you don’t mind, you’ve already got my keys, it’s not like I can go anywhere.” He conceded and jumped to his feet. “Thank you,” I muttered as I climbed to mine, somewhat less agilely than him.
Perching my arse on the edge of my desk I faced off against them, “You two are bastards.”
They nodded their agreement, “Yeah and?” Gabe replied.
Half hour later I’d told them all about my trip to the library on the weekend and how Ashlynn clearly didn’t want anything to do with me. They had remind silent and stony faced throughout my story. As soon as I was done though, they burst into laughter.
“See? Bastards, both of you.” I crossed my arms and waited for them to get a hold of themselves.
“So let me get this straight,” Gabe cleared his throat, “You finally find a girl you’re interested in more than a quick fuck with and she doesn’t want to see your face ever again? Is that what you’re saying?”
I nodded once, “Pretty much.”
Kai was still trying to pull himself together, “I just— are you serious? This is— I like her already.”
If my Jedi mind powers were working I would have made him sack whack himself.
“If you two don’t have any solid advice for me, I’ll be taking my leave.” I snapped.
Gabe’s hand shot out, “Wait, sorry. No actually, I’m not really sorry. I’ve been waiting for this day. All the shit you gave us over the years, you’re going to feel it tenfold, brother.” He grinned.
“Right, well, she’s clearly already more of a handful than you two had to deal with so there it is, there’s my Karma. The only woman I’ve ever actually wanted, hates me. Boom!” I made an explosion with my hands for effect, “Thank you very much, Karma, you nasty little bitch.”
Again with the laughter, “It’s not fucking funny.”
“Oh but it is, it really fucking is.” Kai rasped.
Sitting in my car in the library parking lot made me feel like a total fucking creeper. But I was still trying to figure out my game plan. I had to win her over, but I knew jack shit about her. Groaning, I rested my head against the headrest, think man think!
A tapping against my window had me bolting upright, it was her, my future wife. My pulse sped up at the mere sight of her, even though her eyes were narrowed causing the cutest little wrinkle to form between them, and her lips were pressed together in a thin line. Actually, she looked downright pissed.
I pressed the button to roll down my window…
CHAPTER FOUR
What the hell was he doing here? I thought for sure he was just messing with my head when he said he’d be back. I quickly glanced in the backseat to check if the girls were with him, but they weren’t. Just like he’d said.
I wanted to stomp my foot and throw a tantrum like a child. Who was this guy? What made him think he could just show up at my workplace? My foot started tapping and before I knew it I was knocking on his window.
He jerked in his seat and his window began to lower… As soon as it was all the way down I let fly, “What are you doing here? Who the hell do you think you are? I made it perfectly clear that I didn’t want to see you again, didn’t I?”
When he didn’t respond I prompted him, “Well?”
His Adam’s apple bobbed as he thought about his answer, and my patience snapped. “Seriously, are you stalking me now? There’s no other explanation for you to be sitting in your car all alone in the parking lot, doing what? Waiting for me to come out here so you can lure me into your car with candy or something?”
His chiselled jaw dropped then, “Candy?” he asked, and burst out laughing.
This was not funny. Not funny at all. Not even a little bit.
But despite my best efforts, I started laughing too. Candy? Did I really just say that?
“You have a beautiful laugh,” he murmured and that one comment pulled me from my momentary lapse of composure.
I smoothed down my blouse and skirt then cleared my throat, “What are you doing here?”
He ran his large callused hand through his shaggy hair then he groaned softly, “I honestly didn’t mean to come off as a complete creeper. I just wanted to talk to you. For some reason our first meeting didn’t go as smoothly as I would have liked and I wanted to—” he closed his eyes and growled, literally growled, “Fuck, this isn’t coming out right. Step back,” he instructed as he opened the car door and got out.
I preferred it when he was in the car, I was taller than him then. Now, even in my killer heels he was at least four inches taller than me. I swallowed as his imposing form crowded me, I took an unsteady step back and wobbled on my heel. As I was about to lose my balance his large hands wrapped around my biceps and pulled me against his large chest.
My eyes grew wide as my palms came up flat against his well-defined pecks. Holy crap, he was ripped, like Greek God ripped. My fingers splayed out of their own accord, trying to feel more of him, without actually feeling more of him.
I swallowed hard when I finally looked up and met his gaze, it was intense, so intense I could feel it right down to my now very awake and lively core. I hadn’t reacted to a man like this in a long, long time.
“Jesus, I thought getting out of the car would make it easier to talk to you, but now that I’m out, talking is the last thin
g I want to be doing.” His words fuelled my lust, and the look in his eyes told me he knew it. “Don’t be mad,” he whispered, then his lips were on mine in the softest of touches.
My breath caught in my throat, and a moan slipped passed my lips. He didn’t try to push for more like I thought he would. Instead he took his time, almost like he was tasting me. He peppered my lips with feather light kisses, and slow, soft swipes of his tongue. I was panting for more, I actually wanted him to try for more. I hadn’t been kissed since—
My hands curled into fists and shoved him away from me. I was still breathing hard, thoughts from the present and the past twisting in my mind. I squeezed my eyes shut in an attempt to separate the two.
“Fuck, I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to—” my eyes snapped open, his hand was in his hair again, gripping a fist full of it, “Fuck.” His voice helped bring the present to the forefront of my mind.
I took in his panic stricken face and touched my lips with my fingertips, “It’s okay,” I murmured. He’d made me feel more in that brief kiss than I had in the longest time. I was grateful to him, yet at the same time, I was terrified.
His hand dropped from his hair and he gripped his slim hips then began to pace, “I honestly didn’t mean to act like a total fucking creeper, what the fuck is wrong with me? I’m good with women, women love me, and I love women. Jesus H Christ, maybe I have a tumour?” he was muttering to himself as if I wasn’t still standing here.
“Umm, Axel, it’s alright, really. I mean I don’t know why you’re here, or why you kissed me just now, but I’m fine. No need to beat yourself up.” He had stopped pacing when I said his name and watched me as I stumbled through my awkward ‘you’re off the hook’ speech.
“Then why’d you stop me?”
I was not expecting that response, my mouth opened and closed trying to form some kind of reasonable explanation that didn’t make me sound like the total crazy that I was. He raised a brow when I didn’t respond.
I blinked a few times, but he just kept standing there waiting for me. I swallowed, hard. “I ah, well you’re a stranger and umm well, if you must know, it’s been a while since someone kissed me.”
A panty melting smirk lifted one side of his mouth, oh my. “I don’t want to be a stranger. Not to you. I haven’t stopped thinking about you all week.” He took a step forward, “When I came here, I was planning to win you over with my charming personality then ask you on a date.” He watched me for my reaction, when I was too stunned to give him one he continued, “Would you like to go on a date with me? I mean, I’m assuming that since you didn’t punch me or scream rape when I kissed you that you don’t find me completely repulsive? Right?”
I balked at that statement, “Why would you think I find you repulsive?”
“You couldn’t get me out of here soon enough when I came with the girls the other day, and you were less than impressed to see me here today.”
Both true, but it wasn’t because I found him repulsive. It was because I didn’t.
“I don’t really date.” I explained.
He looked puzzled, “What do you mean?” then his eyes widened, “Oh shit, do you have a boyfriend or something?”
I burst out laughing, “No.”
Axel scratched his chin then clicked his fingers, “A girlfriend then, you’re a lesbian!”
Tears of laughter began to pour down my cheeks, I swear I was this close to hyperventilating. I shook my head, but no words would come from my lips.
I watched his nose scrunch up as a look of pure confusion came over his features, “I’m at a loss then. You’re hot, fucking feisty as hell, have legs that go on forever and you wear, wait, where are you glasses? I distinctly remember glasses.”
I grinned, “I only need them for reading. It’s easier to just wear them all day when I’m in the library. But seeing as I’m about to drive home, I don’t need them right now.”
He nodded but frowned, “Damn, I really like the glasses, they’re sexy as fuck.”
Heat filled me instantly, and my skin was without a doubt fire engine red. I laughed nervously, not sure how to respond.
He shook his head then cleared his throat, then fixed his serious eyes on mine, “Anyway, back to dating, why don’t you date?”
My laughter slowly died down and I filled my oxygen depleted lungs with a deep pull of fresh air before answering him. “Because I’m all kinds of fucked up.” I shrugged. I didn’t usually use such harsh words, but dropping the f-bomb when referring to my mental state wasn’t harsh. It was required.
He frowned, “Why would you say that? You don’t look fucked up.”
I quirked a brow, “Looks can be deceiving.”
At that comment he nodded his agreement, “I, of all people, know how true that is.”
I cocked my head, wondering what he meant by that. But at the same time knowing I wouldn’t ask. It was nearly dark and I liked to be home before darkness arrived. So clearing my throat I said, “Well, I better get going. It was,” I paused trying to find the right word, “refreshing seeing you again, Axel.”
Without waiting for his response I turned my back on him and started for my car. Normally I would never turn my back on a stranger, especially in an empty parking lot. But I didn’t feel any malicious intent coming from Axel, and I always trusted my gut.
As I clicked the button on my keyless entry the lights of my car flashed twice, and I reached for the driver side door handle. Just as my fingers wrapped around it I heard him approaching so I turned my head, looking over my shoulder at him.
His hand was yet again running through his shaggy hair when he spoke, “You didn’t really answer me about that date.”
His persistence warmed me, when it usually would have freaked me out. “Yes I did,” I told him, “I don’t date. Not even you.”
“What if I like fucked up?” he called when I turned away from him and opened the car door, “What if I’m a little fucked up too?”
I swallowed and licked my dry lips, a small part of me wanted to say yes, the part that was tired of hiding from the world. But the much larger, and stronger part of me told me to deny him, protect myself from any possibility of being hurt. “I,” I released a deep sigh, and decided he deserved my honesty, “I would like to, but I just can’t.”
With that I closed my door, turned on my car, and pulled out of the lot.
CHAPTER FIVE
The next day I had lunch at my parents’ house. They lived just over an hour out of the city, in the mountains. It was beautiful, and peaceful, and then my brothers arrived.
Alec and Abe, my big brothers were douchebags on a grand scale. They were just about twins, born exactly one year apart, to the day. They were three and four years older than me. I was my parent’s attempt at bringing a girl into the mix, a failed attempt that my brothers found hilarious.
The doctors even told Mum I was a girl when she went for one of her scans. She got so excited that she made Dad paint the nursery pink, with big colourful butterflies. Then she went on a shopping spree even Ivy couldn’t compete with.
When I was five, and my bothers found a stash of clothes mum hadn’t given away upon the arrival of her healthy 9lb 5oz baby boy, me. They dressed me up like Shirley fucking Temple and sent me on my bike, down to the corner store.
I hated those bastards, they made my life a living hell then and nothing has changed now.
I was sitting at the dining table with my dad making small talk about my recent cases when the Arsehole Twins walked in. I scowled, and dad kicked me under the table then silenced me with a look that said- “Don’t fuck up your mother’s family lunch.” I nodded once and turned my gaze to my plate.
Fucker 1, also known as Abe, spoke up first. Always one to suck up to mum so he wouldn’t get in trouble, he asked, “Where’s Ma?”
Dad gestured to the kitchen with his chin, “Finishing up in the kitchen.”
A look I knew too well passed between them, then they were on me. Pulling me
from my chair I was thrown over someone’s shoulder as the other ran down the hallway and busted open the bathroom door, “NO!” I yelled, I knew what was coming, and I squirmed and fought for my life.
My top half dangled over Abe’s shoulder, I could tell now because in my struggles his shirt had lifted revealing an intricate tribal tattoo that covered his entire back. My arms were free thankfully, so I jabbed him in his left kidney. His grip faltered, and that was all I needed. I jabbed him again, then grabbed hold of his shoulders and pushed my body away from his pulling his shirt over his head with me. He dropped me like a sack of potatoes.
Alec tried to grab me from behind, but I was faster than them now, I whirled on him and ducked under his outstretched arm, latching onto his wrist and bringing it up behind his back with me. “Mercy!” he screamed when I twisted it so hard it was close to dislocating his shoulder.
I smirked as I released him but kicked him behind his knee, dropping him to his haunches for good measure before strutting by him. I flipped them both off before making my way back down the hallway to the dining room and re-joining my father. He smiled at me, a knowing grin lifting his mouth, “kicked their arses?” he asked softly.
I nodded, pride filling my chest when dad responded, “That’s my boy.” And shot me a wink.
Mum loved us all equally and pandered to us like you wouldn’t believe. She only ever saw the good in each of us, meaning she didn’t see when my brothers would be absolute jackarses to me. But my dad taught me how to defend myself against bullies, aka, my brothers.
They had the same build, in fact, we all did. From behind, we could all pass for the other, except for our haircuts. Those two douche canoe’s had their hair cut short on the sides, and a faux hawk on top.
Not me, nope. Yeah I looked after myself, and mess with my hair and you’re a dead man, but a faux hawk- LOSER! Purposefully messy was my look and I worked it well. There was a slight curl in my hair, and when left to grow to the right length… magic. You know how they say, ‘curls get the girls’? Well, it’s true.