by J B Heller
He chewed his lip for a minute, his forehead furrowed in contemplation, “Persistence is vital. She’s obviously damaged in some way, so you need to be gentle but persistent. Make sure she knows without a doubt that you’re not going anywhere. That you are someone she can count on, someone she can lean on.”
I took it all in, every word he was giving me.
Rubbing his clean shaven chin he thought some more. “You need to find out what her damage is before you can really make your move. You’re going to have to settle for friendship first bro, then, maybe, after some time you can go for more.”
That all sounded reasonable, “Okay, I can do that.” I wouldn’t like it, slow was not my style, but I’d do it for her.
“If you’re really serious about this, you have to cut down on whoring yourself out.” Bray interjected. “The minute I realised I wanted Stella I deleted all my black book contacts, if you get what I’m saying.”
Nodding I said, “That’ll be easy. I haven’t even noticed another woman since I met her. So that won’t be a problem.”
“You have player written all over you, so you’re going to have to prove to her that you’re in it for the long haul with her.” Bray continued.
I furrowed my brow, “How is it that I have player written all over me, yet you lot thought I was gay?”
They laughed softly, “We assumed it was a cover.” Gabe explained.
“Right,” I muttered, “that’s a lot of fucking work for a cover.”
He shrugged, “You’re a dedicated kind of guy, you’d go the extra mile to throw us off the trail if you thought you needed to.”
All I could do was shake my head, “Fuck yeah I’m dedicated, but not to cock.” I levelled him with my stare, “To my job, my family, my friends, yeah I’m dedicated. And I’m going to dedicate all my time and efforts now to winning over Ashlynn.”
He nodded and grinned, “Alright brother, whatever you need, we’ll be here.”
CHAPTER EIGHT
Friday Afternoon…
It had been a busy day, I was run off my feet, and all I wanted to do was go home and curl up on the couch with my newest book. I’d started reading it the night before, which was a mistake, since one chapter turned to eight in the blink of an eye and it was two AM and I had to be up at seven to get ready and be at work on time.
I was an eight hour a night kind of girl when it came to sleep. And god help the world if I didn’t get it. Sammy had been giving me a wide berth all day, and I didn’t blame her. I’d been bitchy since I arrived. Not only had I not gotten my required amount of sleep, but I’d spilled my coffee on my blouse while juggling it and my oversized purse when I was unlocking the building in the morning. I was in raging bitch mode by the time she had arrived a half hour later.
Relief filled my system as I locked up and headed for my car, only to come face to face with Axel as I approached my vehicle. “What are you doing here?” I demanded more forcefully than he deserved, or I meant.
His eyebrows rose at my tone, “I’m here to see you,” he said cautiously gauging my reaction.
I rolled my eyes, “I can see that, but why? I told you last week I don’t date, so you’re wasting your time.”
Slipping his hands into the pockets of his jeans he said, “How about friends then?”
It was my turn to raise a brow, “Friends? I’m not following.”
He grinned, “Like you and me, how about we be friends? No dates, just two friends hanging out?”
Suspicion filled my eyes as I watched him kick at the stones on the ground while he waited for my reply. “Why? Why do you want to be my friend all of a sudden? Just last week you were trying to get me to date you and now you want me to be your friend. Forgive me, but what the hell?”
Axel simply shrugged, “I get that you don’t want to go out with me, I’m a virtual stranger after all. So props to you for being aware of stranger danger and all that shit.” He winked before continuing, “But I honestly would like to get to know you, so I’ll take friendship if it’s all I can get right now.”
“I’m still not following. Why me? Why are you so set on getting to know me?” I had to know, even though I hadn’t stopped thinking about him since the moment he entered my library a few short weeks ago, I had to know, why me.
His answering smile took my breath away, “Because I haven’t been able to get you off my mind since I first laid eyes on you. You are the most stunning creature I’ve ever seen. Add to that, you’re fiery, witty, and smart, and I can’t stay away.”
He shifted his gaze down to his feet, and took hold of the back of his neck, “I’ve never been so caught up in someone as I am with you.” His eyes lifted, but not his face, so he was looking at me from under his lashes with a small yet shy grin on his lips.
I had a lump in my throat the size of Texas. No one had ever spoken to me like that before. No one had ever reached out to me like this before. My heart was pounding so hard I was sure he could hear it. And all I could do was stand there, staring at him.
Slowly he lifted his chin, “Ashlynn, can we try friends? Please?” he chewed his bottom lip nervously as he awaited my answer.
He was so earnest in his endeavour. I couldn’t turn him away again. I mustered up all the courage I could possibly find within myself, “Okay,” I whispered.
His eyes immediately widened, “What?”
I swallowed, hard, and cleared my throat. “I said, okay.” I repeated with a little more volume this time.
That same smile that had taken my breath away moments ago filled his handsome face again, causing my heart to lurch in my chest. “Thank you.” He breathed, “I was so fucking nervous you were going to say no again.” He said as he ran his hand through his hair and relaxed back against the hood of his truck that was parked next to my own car.
His relief made me smile, I don’t know what it was about him, but he put me at ease. That is when he wasn’t making my heart stop and start, or causing my lungs to cease working.
He lifted his face skywards, “Thanks, Big Man,” he murmured.
I scrunched my nose, “Did you just thank God?” I asked.
Looking at me he grinned, “Hell yes I did. I knew I needed divine intervention to convince you to give me a chance. I’ve been praying all afternoon.” He declared with a wink.
Laughter bubbled up from the pit of my stomach. “You are insane.” I muttered between bouts of hysterics.
“It’s just one of my many admirable personality traits. You’ll come to love them all in time.”
“I bet.” I smarted back at him.
My face hurt from smiling and laughing so much. I couldn’t remember the last time that had happened. Pulling myself together I figured I should ask the obvious question, “So, what does being your friend entail, exactly?”
“Lots of physical contact.” He shot back in all seriousness. “And clothing is always optional. Friends let friends be naked. Also, a lot of action movies, popcorn, chocolate covered strawberries, sex, long walks on the beach, and candlelit dinners.”
“Sex?” I squeaked.
“Abso-fucking-lutely amazing sex.” He deadpanned.
Clearing my throat I decided to play his game, “Right, so do you have references? I won’t just take your word for it.” I pushed knowing he had to break character soon.
And he did. His eyes filled with heat and the promise of earth shattering orgasms. “How about you try before you buy? Just to make sure you get what you signed up for.” His tone had deepened and it made my insides quiver.
My tongue snaked out to quickly wet my dry lips, and his eyes blazed. “On second thought, I’ll take your word for it.” I squeaked. I was totally going to lose this round.
One side of his lips quirked up in amusement, but the lust in his eyes was as feral as ever, if not more so, from my response. “Oh my little bird, you have no idea what you’re in for.”
My eyes about popped out of my head when I noticed something in his pants… somethin
g that was getting larger by the second. “You’re just messing with me, right? I thought I was agreeing to just plain ol’ friends, not friends with benefits.” My voice was high pitched even to my own ears.
He threw his head back and began to laugh. “Oh, thank God.” I mumbled. Even though a tiny part of me was kicking myself for ruining the little lust-a-thon we had going on.
“Yes Ashlynn, I’m just messing with you. But I’m not going to lie, I would like to do all those things with you, when you’re ready.” The look on his face said it all. He was dead serious.
I had no idea what to say, so I didn’t say anything. I just stood there staring at him.
He laughed softly, “Okay, so your place or mine?”
I choked on the air I was trying to breath, “W—what?”
“For our first time hanging out as friends? If you want to fuck we can, but I thought you took fucking off the table?” he quirked a brow and grinned at me.
“Oh, you got jokes.” I said dryly.
“I’m a funny guy, just another one of those admirable traits I was telling you about.”
I rolled my eyes, “Right,” I muttered. “Look, I don’t want to sound like a bitch, but can’t we do the friends thing in public? You know, where someone will hear me if I have to scream bloody murder?”
He huffed, “Fine.” with a roll of his eyes and a big grin.
I did a little curtsy, “Why thank you, good sir.” I said in the most sugar sweet voice I could muster.
“Who’s got jokes now?” he mocked and I grinned back in response. His expression sobered, “I feel like I need to spell this out for you, and the fact that I need to do that infuriates me. But here it is, you never have to be afraid of me. I will never hurt you Ashlynn. I swear on my life.”
I nibbled my bottom lip, I didn’t know what to say. He was so perceptive, or was I just that transparent?
He took a tentative step towards me, reaching out he placed one of his large hands gently on my cheek. “I don’t know why you’re so standoffish, I don’t know what happened to you, but I will spend as long as it takes showing you that you can trust me.”
Swallowing hard, I inhaled deeply through my nose, picking up his manly scent. I closed my eyes and relaxed into his palm. I believed him, and that scared the crap out of me. I bit down on my lip again to stop it from quivering.
Axel’s thumb brushed across my lip, gently freeing it from my teeth. “I want to kiss you so bad right now. I’m holding on by a thread. I haven’t stopped thinking about your mouth since I kissed you the other day. Nothing has ever tasted so sweet.” He murmured, and I felt his breath on my cheek. He’d moved closer when I’d closed my eyes.
“Ashlynn,” his voice had dropped to a husky whisper. “I want to know you. Inside and out. I know I need to take it slow with you. And I swear I’m trying, but slow isn’t really in my nature. You’re going to need to pull me back in line when I overstep it, okay?”
I still hadn’t opened my eyes. I couldn’t. His words were sinking into my soul. He was being so sweet. Fighting his own nature, for me. “Okay,” I whispered back.
Stroking my lip one last time, he released a deep sigh dropping his hand from my face. And I slowly opened my eyes. This man could have any woman he wanted, I was sure of it. He was more than gorgeous, with his broad shoulders, defined biceps, and that butt, oh my goodness that butt. I had the urge to bite it, and that was not like me at all.
Smiling shyly, I reached out and took his hand. This was a big step for me. But if he was willing to fight his very nature, then I could make some concessions too.
CHAPTER NINE
She was holding my hand, of her own free will, as in, it was her idea. I couldn’t wipe the smile off my face as she shyly glanced up at me from beneath her lashes. I squeezed her hand in mine, “Ready?” I asked.
Her brows bunched and her nose wrinkled adorably, “Ready for what?”
“Our first outing as friends.”
She inhaled a deep breath, then nodded. “As I’ll ever be.” She said.
I grinned. At this point, I didn’t think anything could wipe the smile off my face. Like ever.
Tugging her forward, I walked around to the passenger side of my truck and opened the door for her. She glanced at me over her shoulder, and I could see the reluctance in her green depths. “On my life.” I whispered, reminding her of my earlier words and she nodded, then climbed into my truck.
Rounding the hood and climbing in behind the wheel in record time, I turned the key at the same time as I turned to look at her. She was twisting her hands together in her lap nervously, and I couldn’t help it, I reached out and took one of her small hands in mine. “I’d ask you if you’re sure about this, but I’m too afraid you’ll bail on me. And I’m not ready to say goodbye.”
Her eyes shot to mine, “I want to go with you.”
I raised a brow, “That’s not the vibe I’m gettin’ right now.”
She grimaced, “I know, I’m sorry. I’m trying. I haven’t— I mean, I ah,” she chewed her lip looking for the right words, “This is big for me. Huge actually. But I want to, I do. Just ignore the weirdness coming from me, okay?”
Resting my arm across the top of the steering wheel, I turned my upper body to face her. What the fuck had she been through to make her this way? “Ashlynn, I want you to feel safe with me. What do I need to do to make that happen?”
“I don’t know.” She mumbled.
Then I had idea, “Pull out your phone for me.” I directed, and she did. “Now, call or message whoever you need to, and tell them you’re with me, give them my number plate and name. Then tell them you will call them when I drop you back to your car later tonight.”
She started smiling, “Okay.” Then she began clicking away on the screen. I rattled off my plates to her as she texted, and when she placed her phone back in her lap she looked back at my face. The relief in her posture was evident. “Thank you. I feel a little better now.”
I nodded, “Out of curiosity, who’d you text? I’m going to say…your mother?”
Ashlynn scrunched up her nose, it was adorable. “No, I texted my friend Liz. She’s going to have an absolute fit when she realises I’m out with an actual real life man.” She deadpanned.
Smiling I shot her a wink, “I’m glad I get to be the one to fill those real life man’s shoes. Do you think you can relax enough to enjoy the night now?”
A nod and huge grin was the only response I needed as I put my truck in reverse and pulled out of the parking lot.
Fifteen minutes later I pulled up in front of a little fish and chip shop on the esplanade. “This okay?”
She looked around, clearly noting the amount of people milling around. “Looks good.”
I jumped out and ran around to her side of the car, opening her door before she could and took her hand, helping her down. “Thank you,” she whispered.
I took her hand and looped it around my arm as we walked in to the small takeaway. After ordering and receiving our food we walked along the waterfront for a couple of minutes in silence before finding a free bench.
There was a big playground and water park a couple hundred metres up the street, and it was still fairly early so there were a lot of people around. I chose this spot for that very reason. We could have enough privacy to talk, but not enough to make her feel uncomfortable.
“This is nice,” she noted quietly.
“Glad you like it. I come here a fair bit. The food is good, and the view is nice.”
She nodded as she unwrapped her burger, and took a huge bite. I liked a woman who ate real food. “Oh dis so gud.” She mumbled with a mouthful of food.
My smile widened, “Yeah it is.” Then I dug into my own food.
We ate in comfortable silence, and when we were done I gathered our rubbish and put it in the bin up the pathway a little. When I turned to walk back to the bench, Ashlynn was sitting chewing her thumb nail. “Did you know there are more germs under your n
ails than there are under a toilet seat?” I said as I sat back down next to her.
Her hand dropped away from her face instantly, “Are you serious?”
Nodding I said, “Afraid so.”
“Ugh, that’s disgusting.” Her expression showed her repulsion. She began digging around in her huge handbag, and pulled out a small bottle of mouthwash. She took a swig, swirled it around in her mouth, then gargled it and spat it out behind the bench.
I burst out laughing, “You have mouthwash in your handbag?”
She shrugged, “I have everything in my handbag.”
That spiked my curiosity, “Like what?” I asked at the same time I leaned over to glance in the top of the open bag.
She snatched it away from my view and fastened the zipper, “Secret women’s business.”
“Well now I really want to know.”
She held her bag tightly in her lap, “Well you can’t. It would be like breaking girl code if I let you snoop around in here.”
I raised a brow, “Girl code? I didn’t know there was such a thing.”
“Well is there a bro code?” she asked.
“Yeah,” I drew the word out, not sure what her point was.
“It’s the same thing, but for girls.” She explained.
I supposed that made sense. “So does girl code have rules like Bitches before Misters, and that kind of shit?”
She laughed, “Umm I think so. I’m not very well versed in it, but that sounds about right. Except I think it’s Sisters before Misters.”
I really liked the sound of her laughter, in that moment I resolved to do whatever I had to so that I could hear it more often. “So what’s the rule about handbags? Bags over Balls?”
Her laughter got louder and she wrapped her arms around her waist hunching as far forward as her big arse bag would allow. Oh yes, her laughter was quickly becoming my favourite sound.
When she regained her breath she looked right into my eyes, “Thank you. For this. It’s been better than I thought it would be.”
I gripped my chest over my heart, “Hit me where it hurts why don’t you?”