by Rob Sperry
Girard was the top car salesman and he wasn’t salesy. If you have a fear of sales, get over it! We all sell in just about everything we do in life! I sold myself to my wife to get married. My kids sell me on getting fruit snacks every day. You sell yourself on getting a job or getting a promotion. There is nothing wrong or scary about selling. What’s scary is taking advantage of someone for your own gain. The greats aren’t takers. The greats find a need and fill it by good solid communication.
The reason why most people struggle is that they never understand the difference between selling and marketing. If you want to be successful in your business then you have to learn how to STOP selling and START marketing. — Bob Heilig
W HAT NOT TO DO: THE RECALLABILITY HAS BEENS
The “Has Beens” are those that made a good amount of money years ago. Some of them got lucky and everything went their way, and some of them truly built their organization. Either way, they ride on their past Credibility and stop networking. They lose influence with their current group because they are not engaged in the business. They also stop staying in touch with most people and lose influence of their network. As soon as a leader leaves their group or the company struggles, their income goes down. Once their income goes down, many try to re-engage to build their business back up.
I have referred often to the mentality that rich people think long term while poor people think short term. Their nearsightedness costs them dearly. Networking is the perfect example of building your ark before it rains. Remember, the best time to network is when you don’t need anything. Always be making deposits of goodwill so that when you need to take withdrawals, you have enough goodwill saved up!
Once you become a leader, don’t be arrogant and forget how you got there. Don’t be that “has been” leader who does too little, too late. It doesn’t work. You can’t skip the basic success principles and still expect success because “once upon a time” you had success. You are never above those success principles. Success is earned each and every time. Success is like rent. You must keep paying rent or you will fail.
I am currently in the trenches which means that I am working on a daily basis with my organization. I am leading by example from the front with my actions and not just my words. There will be a time in my life when I am no longer in the trenches. When that time comes, I do not plan on completely checking out. I understand the value of relationships and would never do that.
I do plan on taking summers off. I plan on taking Thanksgiving to New Year’s off. I plan to work less but be more efficient with my time. I plan on creating trips for my new leaders in my organization. I want to thank them and help provide mentorship to them. I want to also continue to always strengthen the relationships with my strongest leaders. This business isn’t just about you, for you are nothing without your team.
Brian Carruthers is the opposite of a “Has Been.” Despite being in the industry since 1994 and having over 400,000 people in his organization, Brian is still in the trenches. He is always making new contacts, leading by example and providing value for his team. At the time of the writing of this book, he is still recruiting new people every day as if he’s in his first month in his business. He still takes his job as a sponsor seriously, locking arms with each recruit to do their presentations for them—staying in “Phase One.” I have never seen him unplug. (Brian also provides live training videos and industry-wide webinars to help everyone.) He still enjoys life with his family and takes regular vacations as you would expect, but he stays consistent. I would be shocked if he ever becomes a “Has Been” because he is always engaged in helping his teams succeed.
GHOSTING 101
There was a particular company that offered me a very good financial package to consult for them. I connected very well with the top executives of this company and thought they were a great fit for me personality wise, as well as for business. For whatever reason, I decided that my passions weren’t aligned with the company’s vision, so I turned down their offer. They were shocked. I immediately sent them thank you texts, and a week later, I sent a thank you email. I never heard back, so I figured they just got busy.
Two months went by and I sent another email seeing if they filled the position they offered me. I let them know that if they hadn’t, I would love to help connect them with some real sharp, dynamic people who could get the job done. Nothing. Zilch. Nada. I still never heard anything back.
Much time has passed since then, and to this day I still haven’t heard a word from this company. I really did connect with them. I still think they are smart and a great group of individuals on both a personal and business level. They are also awful networkers. They don’t get it! Not only could they have cultivated a relationship with me that could have led to us working together someday, they also could have tapped into my entire network. I know I could have helped them fill their position. All they needed to do was stay in contact (Recallability) and not turn into ghosts. When I say stay in contact, I really mean just a few times a year. It’s not that hard to do, but the rewards far exceed the effort of just shooting out a quick text or Facebook message. Since they failed miserably at Recallability, it brought both their Likeability and Credibility down. It made me question their authenticity and professionalism.
P INGING
There is a saying that “short visits make for long friendships.” One of my favorite books for networking advice is the book Never Eat Alone by Keith Ferrazzi. In it he used the word “pinging,” which means to stay in touch with your network. He says you can text, call, or do anything that reconnects you to someone else. He calls it a ping because it is simple a way to stay in touch with someone and increase your Recallability.
My friend Dan McCormick is the best example of someone who pings and is one of the most successful network marketers in the world. He is always asking questions:
“How’s your family? How was your trip that I saw on Facebook?
How is business? What’s the latest in your life?”
As I have spoken to many other of his friends, I found out that this is just who Dan is. He is a professional pinger. I consider that a compliment. A professional pinger to me is someone who is really good about genuinely caring about others, so good that they always find a way to stay in touch. I recently just got back from a networking conference. Somehow, while talking to a 30-year veteran in network marketing, Dan’s name was brought up. The first thing said was, “Oh you know Dan! He is amazing. He still calls me every few months and has done so for 20 years.” While his pinging ways may seem unconventional, so is the fact that he is a multi-millionaire.
Professionals do the little things that the average person doesn’t do over and over again, and Dan’s ability to become a professional pinger has helped him become the successful man he is today. Many of your old acquaintances have probably now become almost strangers. Not total strangers, but you probably wouldn’t feel comfortable asking them for anything, nor would they feel comfortable asking you for anything. They aren’t part of your network. People aren’t strangers if you stay in contact with them. That doesn’t even mean a regular phone call. The trick is to stay in contact with them before you need their help. Think of pinging as a tune-up with your friends. You need to take care of your friends just like you need to change the oil in your car every three months.
Just like the last example with Dan, it takes time to foster relationships that can prove to be fruitful when you need them the most. If you aren’t making regular deposits into your emergency savings account, don’t be surprised when you desperately need to make a withdrawal and you aren’t able to do so. Do you honestly make regular deposits into your relationships, or only when it’s convenient for you? Again, the best time to network is when you don’t need anything. When everything seems to be going well, you don’t need anything, and your urgency to network is low; that should be a flashing neon sign telling you that you need to network and care for your relationships.
G RATITUDE
/> The deepest craving of human nature is the need to be appreciated. — William James
You typically don’t think of gratitude as a principle to help you with recallability, but it is a very dynamic vehicle for increasing it. Gratitude is one of the best ways to make others feel important and connected to you. Lack of appreciation is one of the top reasons for someone quitting their job. It is certainly one of the most common answers I receive when I ask people why they are leaving their current company. I am not talking about the newbie network marketer who leaves for various reasons. I am referring to those who are really committed and who have been with their current company for at least a year.
Zig Ziglar always talked about maintaining an attitude of gratitude. I know that when I am in a bad mood, I am never in an attitude of gratitude. When I am in a good mood, I can usually find tons of things to be grateful for. One of the fastest ways to change your mood from bad to good is to think of some things you are grateful for: the bed you sleep in, the clean air you breathe, your good health, a loving family, knowing where your next meal is coming from. Little things that we often take for granted every day can instantly put you in a state of gratitude if you really take the time to think about them.
CHAPTER 6
BECOMING
UNFORGETTABLE
Staying in touch with people and displaying an attitude of gratitude can sometimes be difficult. Here are some strategies you can start implementing right away to help get ahead and stay organized.
1. MASTER ADDRESS LIST
I have a Google Doc that I update regularly. I keep all significant friends, family members, or associations’ addresses there. You can use this to send out thank you cards, simple gifts, and holiday cards. People tend to like people they relate with, but they also tend to like people who both like them and who are thoughtful. Holiday cards are a simple way to be thoughtful of others.
2. THANK YOU TEXTS, CARDS, AND CALLS
Thank you, thank you, thank you! It goes a long way. After every first meeting with anyone, I always send a thank you text. Many times I continue to do it even after I have gotten to know the individual.
3. GRATITUDE JOURNAL
A gratitude journal is meant to help you reflect on all the positive things in your life and put yourself in a positive state of gratitude. You can be creative with this. You could write one thing you are grateful for in your life and one thing you are grateful for in your business. There’s really no wrong way to do a gratitude journal, unless you’re not doing one at all.
4. THE GRATITUDE CHALLENGE
Try calling or even sending one text a day thanking someone for something they have done, either recently or in the past. It’s a difficult habit to get into, but it’s totally worth it. Try doing it at a set time every day to get into a habit. Do it for a week, then that turns into a month, and next thing you know, you’ve sent gratitude texts for a year or more!
5. FIGURE OUT WAYS TO RECONNECT
“When two people exchange dollar bills, each still only has one dollar. When two people each exchange networks, they each have access to two networks,” according to Harvey McKay. When two people exchange dollar bills, each person is providing something of value, but no significant gain or loss has occurred. Instead, the transaction builds a sense of trust. You must keep reconnecting with others to build that trust and stay recallable. By understanding the value of exchanging networks it will give you a deeper purpose to want to reconnect.
People love to be remembered. Find ways to send a text of a good memory, an inquiry of how they are doing, an invitation to connect on the phone soon to catch up, and/or a congratulations on any recent achievement. Honestly it could be anything but if the relationship means anything to you it shouldn’t be too hard to find a reason to reconnect.
T HE FRIENDSHIP FORMULA SIMPLIFIED
Authors Jack Schafer & Marvin Karlins talk about the friendship formula in their book The Like Switch. I think it is a great formula to help you not only build your relationships but also to better understand the different levels of Recallability. They have found that proximity, frequency, duration, and intensity are the four factors that strengthen a friendship. Studying and implementing these four factors really are part of the formula to stronger friendships. Think of these four factors as the best principles for improving Recallability:
Proximity is how close you are to a person. This doesn’t always have to be physically close, especially with video chatting technology nowadays. However, spending some quality one-on-one time together will do more for a relationship than hanging out in a group.
Frequency refers to how often you spend time with someone. Do you talk to this person once a month? Once a week? Every day? As the frequency goes up, the quality doesn’t always have to be as high. If you and your spouse see each other every day, then there is no need to go on date night every single night. However, if your spouse is part of the military and comes home for two weeks before having to be deployed again, you are going to make sure that those are an incredible two weeks because the frequency of seeing that person is lower. The more often you are around someone, the more they will trust you. In marketing and advertising, you are taught that it takes a consumer seven times of seeing your ad before they buy. This same principle relates for building trust with others. Increase the frequency to increase the trust.
Duration is the length of time that you are spending with someone. If you run into a friend while shopping at the mall and just say hello while passing by, while it’s better than nothing, it will do very little to build that relationship. However, if you organize a time to go out with that same friend, even in a group, the relationship will be better just because you spent more time with that person.
Lastly, intensity is the key to the vault. This is all about quality instead of quantity. It is about connecting with people at a personal level over simply collecting names. Intensity is like the culmination of the previous three factors: proximity, frequency, and duration. If you are close to someone often and spend long amounts of time with that person, you are going to naturally have a greater relationship with that person than someone you barely see. If the frequency you are around a person is low, the duration you spend with them must obviously be high. Muhammad Ali said, “Don’t count the days, make the days count.”
I love that quote from Muhammad Ali and to make it my even deeper I would say, “Don’t count the moments; make the moments count!”
The more time you spend around someone, the more influence you have. When working on maintaining relationships, it is important to remember this! It might sound more difficult to organize a time to go to lunch with someone to catch up, but it will be a lot more meaningful and beneficial in strengthening the relationship than an occasional text, phone call, or chat while in passing will ever be because that is implementing multiple factors from the Friendship Formula.
N ETWORK LIKE A PROFESSIONAL! SOCIAL MEDIA STRATEGIES TO CRUSH RECALLABILITY
Social networking is brilliant.
Just when you think it’s doom and gloom
and you have to spend millions of pounds on marketing
and this and that, you have this amazing thing
now called fan power.
The whole world is linked through a laptop.
It’s amazing. And it’s free.
I love it. It’s absolutely brilliant. — Simon Cowell
Let me get to some strategies you can and should start implementing today to network like a professional. If you don’t consider yourself very good at social media this will be the most overwhelming part of the book. Take a deep breath. You don’t need to know everything. Read this entire section first. Then pick one section to implement. I do feel strongly that social media is becoming so relevant in everything we do that I need to spend a little more in depth on this particular topic.
We have gone over first impressions. Many first impressions nowadays actually come from social media. People literally decide who you are or
aren’t based on your social media content. We all know that social media is a huge part of our lives, but I don’t think most of us truly realize just how much potential there is with it. Through social media, you are able to know what’s going on in someone’s life. We can reach 60 people in 60 different countries in 60 seconds using our thumbs. There is no way you can build a brand and maintain the trust of a vast majority of people without social media. As professionals, it is imperative we are using social media correctly to network!
Calvin Becerra has spent years building his brand the right way. He is all over social media giving a great balance of who he is as a leader, husband, father and friend. He is a personal friend and I am amazed at how well he does on social media portraying who he really is. He will give insightful leadership posts mixed with lifestyle and family. As you follow Calvin on social media you are attracted to his brand which represents him very well. Find others to follow to learn how to brand yourself. As always, just be the best version of you, but always learn from other top leaders.
Now this book isn’t going to provide a total and complete social media breakdown, but there are a couple small things I want to share with you that will help you grow your brand and Credibility on the internet.
First off, make sure to post at least once a week. Share something of value. Sometimes it could be about your personal life, while other times it could be something funny or inspiring. I think you should be doing at least two posts per day, but I know everyone can do at least one post per week. If you want to be a good leader and networker there’s no excuse to not be putting your own insightful stuff out there into the ocean of social media!