by Rob Sperry
Dear Mike,
I am sorry to hear that you no longer have interest in learning more about Duke University however I do want you to know that my staff and I wish you the very best in your college career. You are a fine young man and you make an immediate impact on whatever you choose.
Take care, and best of luck.
Sincerely
Mike Krzyzewski
Head Basketball Coach
This letter blew me away. Coach K was a true networker at the very beginning of his coaching career. It is by no accident that he has had so much success.
Sometimes, things don’t go your way. Sometimes, people leave your business. Sometimes people leave your network marketing organization. It happens! It is part of the business, and it will happen to you many times once you have a large networking organization. The majority of companies and distributors claim to have an abundance mentality. They claim that they only want what’s best for you and always have your best interest no matter what. Unfortunately, many leaders fail to live by what they teach. The moment you leave their organization, your so-called “friendship” changes immediately. This is not true of all leaders by any means, but it does happen way too often.
In a normal job, when someone leaves to go to another company, it typically isn’t that big of a deal. In network marketing, if you are a leader and leave to another company, it is a huge deal! This is a relationship business, so companies and distributors take it very personally. Not only do they take it personally, but it also directly affects their income. When you mess with someone’s income, for the short-sighted fear sets in and emotions run high. You may also find yourself dealing with the ‘Telephone Game’ where someone says one thing, who tells someone else, who tells someone else, and before you know it, there are major untrue rumors flying around. When you mix hurt feelings with money, that is a recipe for disaster!
Here is my take. If anyone (leader or not) leaves your organization, it is because of one of these reasons:
1.You did a poor job leading them.
2.They found a better fit.
3.They made a mistake leaving.
The important part is that it doesn’t matter! They are gone from your company, so do the right thing and part on good terms. Remember not to burn bridges. Be a good friend. Communicate with each other effectively so you can end on a good note and continue the relationship. Be who you said you were!
I personally don’t feel that I lose leaders very often, and it is obviously hurtful when it happens. Yet, when you have a large organization it is inevitable. Every single time a leader leaves my group, I call them to wish them the best of luck. And I mean it.
I remember years ago a very sharp woman who had only been part of my team for a few months left for another company. I called her and told her that if she ever needed any mentorship or anything at all to not hesitate to call me. She broke down in tears and thanked me. It was a hard thing to do, but it was the right thing to do. It felt so gratifying that I was thinking bigger than just myself. This isn’t always easy to do. I will admit that sometimes this is the last thing I want to do, but it is the right thing to do. Sometimes you will feel that you have done everything right and the other person is being impossible. My advice to you is to take a step back when you feel your ego may be getting involved and ask the question… how does it help?
An interesting side to this story, and a note of irony, is that I thought this girl was making a massive mistake leaving my team and company. She ended up having a tremendous amount of success and has been with her current company for eight years. Remember, serving others isn’t about you, it’s about the other person. A leader with a true abundance mentality realizes that the relationship, the happiness of the other person, and not the money is what real wealth is made of.
EGO = ELIMINATING GROWTH OPPORTUNITY
I recently saw a t-shirt that summed it up best: “Your ego is not your amigo.” You should always be looking at how you can help others. If your ego comes into play and clouds your judgment, are you really helping others? How can you become a better leader and person? Take the high road no matter what! Don’t let your ego get in the way of your happiness, your relationships, and your profitability. By taking the high road, even when it’s tough, your ego will shrink and your happiness, quality relationships, and profitability will grow.
Being in the industry full-time since 2008, I have had thousands upon thousands of customers and distributors. As I said earlier, it is inevitable that leaders will leave your team. Five individuals — Bruno Morini, Josh Rapkin, Darren Olayan and Ryan and Ashleigh Di Lello — were all once leaders in my organization. I recently spoke to Josh on the phone, went to dinner with Ryan and Ashleigh, and am once again working with Bruno. Things don’t always end up the way they did with Bruno and me, but with good intentions, great communication, a friendship-first attitude, and an abundance mentality, it is absolutely possible. I had no idea that Bruno and I would someday work together again, but, it didn’t matter. Doing the right thing for the right reason is justification enough. Relationships are king when networking. Remember, only Takers burn bridges.
Travis and Summer Flaherty are two of the top industry leaders. They do a phenomenal job of staying mature when a distributor leaves their organization. I remember talking to Travis at length about the topic of how to handle it with maturity when your group leaves. He shared a story about a very large team in Peru that had left his organization due to some unforeseen problems. They were attached to Travis and Summer as leaders, but the company wasn’t working out for this particular group. Travis said that when he visits Peru, his old team picks him up at the airport to hang out as friends, even though they are in a different company! That is network marketing done right!
One of the top leaders in network marketing, Tom Chenault, said it best: “Love like crazy, and then love more.”
CONCLUSION
Do you remember Hans from the movie Frozen? Please don’t be a Hans! I have two daughters, so I have seen the movie too many times. Hans is a Prince who upon arriving in the kingdom, Arendelle, makes an instant connection with Princess Anna. He uses every skill from Likeability and Credibility to manipulate his way into an engagement after only knowing Princess Anna for a whopping whole day!
Later in the movie, his true colors are revealed: his only intentions were to take over the kingdom, and he had no real genuine interest in Princess Anna. Kristoff on the other hand wasn’t great at making a first impression, but he was truly a great guy who had Princess Anna’s best interest. In the end, the tortoise (Kristoff) beat out the hare (Hans). Remember, intentions matter. Doing the right thing well, for the wrong reasons, is still the wrong thing! Fortunately, most of the skills from this book cannot be faked, and some are impossible to manipulate. Even still, please don’t be a fake person like Hans!
W HO WINS IN NETWORKING: THE SPRINTER OR THE MARATHON RUNNER?
This profession isn’t a marathon or a sprint. It is a bunch of races, some short, some long. If you always perceive this profession as a marathon, then you will never have a sense of urgency. If you always perceive this profession as a sprint, you will burnout. Sometimes, the situation requires us to sprint. When it’s time to sprint, sprint really, really hard. When it’s time to walk, walk with your chin up and be aware of your surroundings, because you never know when it may be time to start jogging or sprinting again.
THE DEER, THE DOG, THE GIRAFFE AND THE WOLF
Lon Wardrop has had the single greatest impact on my network marketing career than anyone else. Without him I wouldn’t be in this incredible profession. I still have his voice in my head coaching me. I have to share one of my favorite lessons from Lon with you. He used to always tell me there are four different types of animals in this business. I remember them distinctly because he wouldn’t just tell the story, but he would act it out with impersonations of each animal. Now, these are just analogies, so please don’t get offended. There are no bad intentions in this analogy
and I know each type also has a ton of strengths that aren’t mentioned.
Dogs get all excited about a new opportunity. They are going to conqueror the world! They run around and are so excited to show everyone their excitement. In fact, they get so excited that they pee on themselves and over everyone else around them! Unfortunately, as soon as things get tough for dogs they whimper and go off to lick themselves in the corner, taking themselves out of the picture.
Deer think they are faced with too many choices. Instantly fear begins to set in, and very soon when the deer gets a rejection it becomes like a car at night with headlights: the deer gets stuck when the headlights show up. You would think or assume they would simply just dart out of the road, but they get run over (thus the statement ‘a deer in the headlights’). The deer has taken itself out of the picture.
Giraffes, as we all know, are very tall. On average, a full-grown giraffe is 14 feet tall. Giraffes get excited about a new challenge but don’t jump all in. They are very strategic, and even more curious. In fact, they are so curious that they use their height and loooooong neck to continually peek over and check out what’s going on, but don’t leap in. They are the lookie-loos that never jump into action, thus taking themselves out of the picture.
Wolves are laser-focused. When wolves are excited, they have a look in their eyes of unwavering confidence. They are well-respected because they are never off their game and they exude self-respect. Wolves network well and travel in packs to make things happen. The packs they travel with are lifted up and perform better because of the consistency and leadership of the wolf. Unlike the dog, the deer, and the giraffe, the wolf does not take itself out of the picture because it refuses to conform and it creates its own reality.
Kierston Kirschbaum has over 50,000 distributors in her organization. She has the wolf mentality and says it best. “When we choose things that seem scary that’s when we grow the most. Feel the fear and do it anyway.”
Every decade we have some kind of economic downturn. Economies predictably go up and down. Individuals constantly switch occupations. The job market constantly changes. Quite a while back, it appeared to be impossible that Blockbuster would go bankrupt, yet it happened. Circuit City also seemed to have a solid revenue stream but also went out of business. Businesses change and new aptitudes are required.
Your best protection strategy is forever your NETWORK. Your NETWORK isn’t just those individuals in the current network marketing business you’re building. Your NETWORK is everyone you strive to build relationships with, and those they are connected to and so on, regardless if they are in your current company or not. Ability alone won’t spare you. Not even education, nor the government, will spare you. A NETWORK is your best protection and is your best insurance policy. Networking is not only your insurance policy, it is the key to happiness. Networking is the foundation of life.
Be the best you. You can’t be Steve Jobs! Richard Branson would have been horrible had he tried to be Steve Jobs. Steve Jobs would have been awful had he tried to be Richard Branson. They both have had an insane amount of success, but both of them did so because they focused on becoming a better version of themselves.
I have learned so much from so many great people in my life, but the most influential have been my wife Janeia, my parents, my first mentor in the industry Lon Wardrop, my brother and sister, and my business partner Lance Conrad. My mom taught me gratitude. My dad taught me to have belief in myself. Lon and Lance taught me boldness. My wife keeps teaching me how to treat others. She is the best person and networker I know.
I am so grateful for network marketing. I have had the great opportunity to not only grow a skill set but to continue to create so many long-lasting relationships. Networking has made me a better husband, father, leader, and friend. If I made no money at all, the amount of friendship and personal development that I have received alone would be worth it. No one tells you on their deathbed that they wish they would have been wealthier. Happiness truly is about the strong relationships we develop in this life.
What’s going to make you different? Who are you, to yourself? Who are you to others? What do you want to be known for? Everyone says they are different, and that is true. However, you need to take it to the next level to stand out. What is going to make you exceptional?
There is very little that separates the good from the great. There are many things that you are good at, and a small number of things you are great at. I hope this book has helped you better understand the Game of Networking and the importance networking plays in every aspect of your life. I also hope that by applying these skills you can take your networking skills from good to great. Find one thing in this book that you can apply and go become a better networker today.
If you like this book, then please share it with your network. Start networking with someone else by gifting them a copy of this book. If you love this book, please leave a review on Amazon (www.tgonbook.com) and help me network. Leaving a review is something so simple but very few actually do it. I would greatly appreciate any reviews to help me with The Law of Credibility. If you do so please find me on Facebook and send me a screenshot of your review so I can thank you. If you hate this book, please send me your critique and let me know how I can improve it. Lastly, remember to join my Facebook group The Game of Networking so I can stay connected with you.
When you are in the final days of
your life, what will you want?
Will you hug that college degree in the walnut frame?
Will you ask to be carried away to the garage
so you can sit in your car?
Will you find comfort in rereading your
financial statement? Of course not.
What will matter then will be people.
If relationships will matter most then, shouldn’t
they matter most now? — Max Lucado
Download my free eBook on how to never run out of contacts
www.robsperry.com/blueprint