More Than My Words

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More Than My Words Page 7

by Ann Lister


  “Like you wouldn’t believe.”

  “Me too, but that’s a good thing, isn’t it? I mean, it proves we’re both—”

  “Interested?” Mason finished for Tessler.

  “I was going to use the phrase “on the same page,” but I guess interested covers it, too.”

  The car horn blared outside a second time, and Mason did his best to stand upright. He removed his phone from his back pocket and typed out a quick message to the driver, telling him he’d be out in a minute, then slid the phone back into his pocket. His eyes found Tessler’s and held.

  “Do you … date?” Mason questioned.

  “Would you like to?”

  “Hell yes—especially after a first kiss that good.” Mason smiled at Tessler and ran the pads of his fingers over his swollen lips.

  Tessler’s grin was magnetic. “I think we owe it to ourselves to go out on at least one date after a kiss like that.”

  “Definitely.” Mason’s face hurt from smiling so broadly. He felt as if he were fifteen again. Alive and whole, like the cane he leaned on wasn’t a necessary tool for his mobility, and his clothing wasn’t hiding the deep scars left from the fire. He felt … sexually attractive for the first time in ages and desired by a man who he wanted so fucking bad. Jesus, he never thought he’d get this part of his life back—or do so with a man as interesting as Tessler. But would Tessler still be interested in him after he saw what his body looked like beneath the clothing?

  “Give me your phone,” Tessler directed.

  “Why?”

  “So I can put my number into it,” Tessler answered and held out his hand.

  “Oh, right.” Mason passed Tessler his cell and watched as he punched in his digits and then handed it back to him.

  “That’s my private number, so please don’t give it out,” Tessler said.

  “Goes without saying,” Mason said and reached for the door handle. “You’re forgetting I work in security for high profile people. I know the drill.”

  “Here, you can put your number into my phone,” Tessler suggested and passed Mason his cell.

  A moment later, they were ready to leave. Tessler helped Mason open the door, then leaned against the edge of it. “I’ll never be more protected, then, when you’re around. Is that what you’re saying?”

  “Damn right,” Mason said. He offered Tessler a wink before he eased himself off the front steps and back into the rain to cross the street to the waiting car. As soon as he settled into the backseat of the car, he pulled out his phone to send Tessler a text message.

  Chapter Eight

  Mason had left him in such a mindless state of mush, he practically melted down the wall like ice cream and pooled in a puddle on the floor. No one had ever kissed him like that. He felt boneless, his insides were like jelly, but every single nerve in his body was on fire, and his cock was painfully hard. What was it about Mason that flipped a switch in him the way he did? Christ, it felt like he’d been struck on the head with a cast iron frying pan.

  Holy fucking shit. This can’t be good.

  Tessler didn’t react to men like this. Ever. It wasn’t the way he was wired. When he had an itch, he found a man to scratch it. Then, he went on with his life and never gave the man another thought. Most importantly, he never had to offer anything of himself in the process—at least not the parts of him that mattered, like his heart or what was in his soul. He’d never shared those pieces of himself with anyone. It was so much safer that way and far less complicated.

  But Tessler could already tell Mason was different. This itch with him wasn’t going to be just physical. It would end up going much deeper than that. Even this early on, with them getting to know each other, he could already feel it simmering just beneath the surface of his skin like a slow burn. Without knowing it, Mason was offering something to him that no one else ever had, and up until now, Tessler hadn’t even known he was looking for it.

  Now, after that one, smoking hot kiss, Tessler’s interest was piqued. He definitely wanted more time with Mason—more of everything. But doing so changed the game completely, and this would end up turning into something far different than his usual random hook-ups. It would also make things messy and complicated, and Tessler didn’t do complicated or messy for a reason. His life was too fucked up to even consider wanting to expose someone to that. It wouldn’t be fair to them. What if emotions factored into things? Then what? Tessler had never taken a chance on a relationship with someone, and he didn’t know the first thing about being part of one, either. His first agent was someone he thought might lead to something, but Tessler had been young and dumb to the wicked ways of lust, and stupidly confused that with real emotions. It hadn’t been a complete waste of his time by any stretch of the imagination. The agent was able to get Tessler his very first contract with a publishing house, and he was also a wealth of knowledge with the business in general. Tessler hired that agent back when he was a newbie on every level, and when he finally severed ties with the agent, he walked away a rich young man and a very sexually experienced one, too. That was the last time Tessler had opened himself up in that way. The biggest lesson he took away from his time with his first agent was to never mix business with pleasure, and several years later, he’d still managed to stick to that rule.

  The way he lived his life now made relationships impossible, which is why he’d never even considered one. Between his crazy work hours and his need for a more private or reclusive life, no man would want that for himself. For Tessler, he had no choice. His job forced him to live the way he did, well that, and the fact he was technically three different people, and only three people in his life knew all the pieces of him—his lawyer, his first literary agent, and his Key West friend. One was legally bound to keep his secrets, another was ethically bound, and the third was morally bound.

  Tessler picked up his phone and considered sending a message to Mason. It’d only been a few minutes since he’d left the apartment. Was that too soon for Tessler to contact him? If he had experience with these kinds of human interactions, he’d know the answer to that question. Unfortunately, he had zilch knowledge with this shit, and for that reason, he tossed his phone back on top of the kitchen counter and left the room before he did something stupid to encourage something he had no right to do.

  If Mason is as smart as I think he is, he’ll lose my number and never talk to me again.

  He was halfway across the living room when he heard his phone ping in the kitchen. It took just a few seconds for him to hurry back to the counter and read the new message. When he saw it was from Mason, his entire face lit up with a smile. He plunked himself down onto a stool at the same counter he and Mason had sat at less than an hour before and hit the button to open up the message screen.

  “Is it too soon to message you?” Mason’s message asked.

  Tessler laughed and didn’t hesitate to respond. “LOL. I almost messaged you a minute ago, but changed my mind,” Tessler admitted.

  “We’ve already established I don’t know what I’m doing with this dating stuff, so ...”

  “I’m with you on that.”

  “Still want to risk going out with me?” Mason questioned.

  “You’re the one who’s in danger being with someone like me, not the other way around,” Tessler said as a tease.

  “Someone like you? What does that even mean?”

  “You’ll find out soon enough.” Tessler grinned as he hit the send button.

  “Are you trying to scare me off?” Mason asked.

  “Is it working?”

  “I’m a former Marine. We don’t feel fear, but when I’m with you ...”

  Tessler read Mason’s last message several times. What exactly was Mason feeling? Was it more than possible fuck buddies? Did he feel the same mix of crazy electricity pulsing through him as Tessler did, or was he feeling nothing more than lust? Tessler would be okay with any of those emotions, as long as it wasn’t fear. He didn’t want Mason to be
afraid of what was happening between them. Cautious, yes. They could carefully navigate this new landscape together and see what happens, right? Nothing wrong with that, so what, if it doesn’t work out. Tessler wasn’t necessarily afraid to give a few dates with Mason a try. Why not? The new feelings he was experiencing with Mason were definitely worthy of something he needed to see through. This felt special—and rare.

  “Did I lose you with my last comment?” Mason’s next message read.

  “No, I’m here. I was just thinking, that’s all.”

  “About all the reasons why you shouldn’t see me again?” Mason typed.

  Tessler hadn’t known Mason all that long, but he knew the man well enough to know he wasn’t that insecure with himself. He was merely being flirty with his comments, and for that reason Tessler decided to jump in with both feet and go for it. “What’s your schedule like?”

  “For a pity date?” Mason typed back.

  “You’re being ridiculous,” Tessler answered. “And I think you already know that.”

  “Sorry. I told you, I’m out of practice with this shit.”

  “Me too, but we’ll manage.” Tessler typed. “I just need to figure out how we can make this work with our schedules … the location needs to be right, too.”

  “What do you mean?” Mason asked.

  “My deadlines are crazy, and I’m always working to meet one,” Tessler typed back. “Plus, not to sound arrogant, but if we go out to certain areas, there is a security issue I have to deal with. Sometimes I get lucky and no one bothers me. Other times, I’m practically swarmed, and it can get dangerous for me and anyone with me.”

  “Do you use a personal security team?” Mason queried.

  “Depends on the situation. Around town here I don’t bother with security, but if I go anywhere else, I need a detail with me,” Tessler typed.

  “Have you ever had a serious problem with fans getting too close?” Mason asked.

  Ah, the million dollar question, Tessler thought. Considering the line of work Mason was in, he was surprised it had taken him this long to ask Tessler about his personal security. Maybe he was simply being polite and didn’t want to ask too many invasive questions right off the bat. Tessler considered his words carefully before he typed his reply.

  “I’ve had a couple of situations where my safety came into question. One of those times left me pretty banged up. After that, I decided to stay in the background of the business. I write my books, hand them off to the publisher, and the royalties go directly into my bank account. All in all, it’s a pretty good gig.”

  “But you basically have to hide out in order to achieve that,” Mason retorted. “You can have a security detail that is basically invisible. The really good teams are trained to be there to thwart an actual threat and stay in the shadows otherwise, which allows you to have a life.”

  “I wasn’t complaining. I have a great life,” Tessler defended.

  “I’m not implying otherwise. I just mean … never mind. I don’t know what I mean. I just want you to be safe. That’s all.”

  “I haven’t had an incident with an overzealous fan in years, and the few people I have working for me have been great. I’m not planning on needing any more employee changes, so it’s good,” Tessler countered.

  “What about when you take a vacation?”

  “What about it?” Tessler asked back.

  “Do you have personal security with you when you travel?” Mason asked.

  “Are you applying for the job?” Tessler typed and then laughed as he hit the send button.

  “I’m not back to my normal 100% yet, but once I am, I’d be happy to watch your … back.”

  “Just my back?

  “I have a feeling watching any part of you would be interesting,” Mason replied. “It’d sure look good on a resume.”

  Tessler read Mason’s last statement several times to let it sink in. Was that all he’d be to Mason—an entry on his resume if he allowed him to get close? This was exactly why Tessler didn’t let too many people into his life. There were far too many looking for something from him to add one more to the list. If Mason was going to be one of those, then it didn’t make sense to move forward with this attraction.

  “Hey, I was joking with that last comment,” Mason explained. “We work under a clear set of codes and ethics. There’s no name dropping. Ever. So, whatever you say to me or whatever might happen between us—like hopefully another kiss, it stays between us and goes no further. You have my word on that.”

  Relief washed through Tessler after reading Mason’s last message. Jesus, he wanted to take a chance and trust someone, and Mason seemed like a nice guy to take that leap of faith with, too. He was intriguing, intelligent, and he also seemed genuine, which wasn’t something Tessler was used to seeing in men who showed an interest in him. Added to those qualities was the undeniable sexual chemistry they shared that had Tessler’s cock hardening whenever he thought about him, and this was a potent situation. It all brought Tessler to one conclusion: He really wanted to get to know Mason better and see where this might possibly go.

  “You okay, or did I lose you?” Mason asked again.

  “I’m still here, but my agent would demand I point out that if we’re going to see each other again, I’d have to insist on complete discretion and maybe have you sign some paperwork regarding that.”

  “If it makes you feel more comfortable with me, I’d be happy to sign a non-disclosure form,” Mason added.

  “You know about those?” Tessler asked.

  “Let’s just say, yours wouldn’t be the first one I’ve had to sign,” Mason explained.

  “We should talk more about this, instead of texting,” Tessler suggested.

  “How about next weekend?” Mason ventured.

  Truth be told, Tessler hadn’t ever been on an official date. The hook-ups that littered his past could hardly qualify as dates, and it was an insult to even compare the two aspects of his life. Being with Mason would be uncharted territory for him, and it could possibly be the same for Mason, too. Tessler wasn’t sure about Mason’s past, but judging by the awkward banter going on between them right now, it had all the indicators pointing in the direction that this was new for Mason as well. For some reason, the idea of that made Tessler smile. But before this went any further than that one amazing kiss, Tessler needed to have a very real conversation with Mason—face to face, if possible. That would alleviate a paper trail, which was always best in situations such as this.

  “Let me take a look at my calendar,” he typed back to Mason.

  He switched screens on his phone to look at his appointments and then it suddenly hit him. He was leaving in three days for his annual vacation. Un-fucking-believable. The timing of this particular conversation couldn’t be any worse, and it was too late for him to cancel his trip, wasn’t it?

  “I’m actually going to be out of town for a while starting on Wednesday,” Tessler typed. His finger hesitated on the send button, and when the message finally did go through, he grimaced. He didn’t want to give Mason the idea he wasn’t truly eager to go out with him. He was absolutely interested, but he couldn’t change his vacation now. He was locked into it with a lot of arrangements already made. Besides, wouldn’t it be crazy to cancel a trip just because he’d shared an incredible kiss with the first man who had intrigued him in years?

  “Hey, no worries. It’s cool. We can do it some other time,” Mason answered a full minute later.

  The words that popped up on Tessler’s screen told him Mason thought he was getting the proverbial brush-off and that definitely wasn’t the case. “How about Monday or Tuesday?” Tessler quickly typed back. “We could meet here or at the coffee shop, whatever you’re comfortable with. Not to sound like a dick, but I’d have to hire security if we go outside of this town though.”

  Too much time had passed without a response from Mason, and Tessler was beginning to think he’d lost him. Finally, his phone pinged agai
n.

  “I’m not feeling uncomfortable with any of this, but maybe you are?” Mason finally asked.

  “I’m good here, too. The timing of my trip sucks,” Tessler confirmed. “How about Monday? We could do lunch or an early dinner and have time to hang out after. Would that work for you?”

  Another long pause followed and Tessler was just about to send another text to Mason when his phone finally pinged again.

  “I can’t do Monday. I have two doctor appointments that day and both are in LA,” Mason typed.

  “How does Tuesday look for you?” Tessler asked.

  “Don’t you have shit to do to get ready to leave on Wednesday?” Mason questioned.

  Tessler had a boatload of things he needed to do before he left. The responsible part of him was well aware of the phone meetings he had scheduled for Tuesday, and the last of the edits he needed to handle before he sent the file back to the editor, but the irresponsible side of him—the side of him that wanted a social life, didn’t want to miss an opportunity to spend more time with Mason. That wasn’t too much for him to ask, was it? It wasn’t every day that he met someone like Mason, and now he had to walk away—for practically an entire goddamned month?

  Tessler debated about how he should word his next response and took a minute to gather his thoughts. He was starting to type when another message came in for him. “It’s okay.” Mason’s message started. “We don’t need to try and force this to happen before you leave. Maybe we can try and catch up when you get back. Our schedules might be more open by then.”

  “Can I text you while I’m gone?” Tessler asked.

  “Yeah, sure. Why not?”

  “Okay, then I will,” Tessler countered. “And thanks again for that kiss.”

  “Thank you for letting me dry off from the rain and for the coffee. The kiss was pretty good, too.”

  “Just pretty good?” Tessler shot back.

  “That kiss was more than just good, it was … phenomenal.”

  “I like the sound of that better,” Tessler typed. “It definitely was phenomenal.”

 

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