by Ann Lister
“I completely understand,” Tessler said.
“Well, if you think this is too much for you to handle, then I’d understand why you wanted to walk the other way, okay? No harm, no foul, and life goes on.”
“Do you really think I wouldn’t want to be with you just because you have PTSD?” Tessler asked in a sharp tone that bordered on annoyance. “I’m not that kind of an asshole.”
“It’s not just the PTSD,” Mason continued. “It’s the issues I have with the scars on my body, and occasionally, I have nightmares, too. Trust me when I say, it’s a lot to deal with.”
“Anything else?” Tessler asked.
“Nope, I think that about covers it,” Mason said and shook his head. He was thankful for the slight grin on Tessler’s face. It gave him a hint that things just might be okay after all.
Tessler held onto the sides of Mason’s neck. “Look, we’re both broken in different ways, everyone is,” he said, “but maybe we were supposed to meet so we could help each other through some of the bullshit. Ever think of that?”
Mason shrugged. “You’re way too good for me,” he said and smiled.
“You’re too hard on yourself.” Again, Tessler teased him with that grin.
“I’m a work in progress, and I’m a fighter,” Mason said. “I will overcome this, like everything else, and be stronger for going through it.”
“I have no doubts about that,” Tessler countered. “I think you said you’re seeing a therapist?”
“Yeah, she’s been helping me with all of this shit.”
“Well, that’s a good thing,” Tessler countered. “Give her a call and see her this week so she knows what happened tonight.”
“I will, I promise,” Mason agreed.
“Would you like a piece of my cake?” Tessler asked with a grin.
“Depends.”
“On what?” Tessler questioned.
“Do I get to sing “Happy Birthday” to you?”
“Singing is not allowed,” Tessler said as he stood up from Mason’s lap. “My party. My rules.”
“Way to kill a buzz.”
Tessler laughed as he removed the cake from the refrigerator. He set the container on the work station beside the stove and reached for plates in a cabinet above him and forks from the drawer at his hip. After popping off the plastic dome, he sliced two big pieces of chocolate mousse cake with vanilla buttercream frosting and carried the dessert over to the table, setting a plate down in front of Mason.
Mason latched on to Tessler’s wrist and tugged him down for a kiss before he sat. “Happy Birthday—a few hours late,” he said and smiled.
“Thank you,” Tessler answered somewhat shyly.
They dug into the cake and ate in amicable silence with nothing more than the occasional moan of approval for sound. Mason was licking his fork when a thought occurred to him. “Did your coming home early from vacation have anything to do with your birthday?” he asked Tessler.
“Maybe.”
“Seriously?” Mason asked in surprise.
Tessler shrugged and swallowed another bite of his gooey, chocolaty confection. “I had the sudden urge to be with someone I cared about on my birthday.”
“Don’t you celebrate with people in Key West every year?” Mason asked.
“Well, sure. There’s usually a small party that happens.”
“Then, you came home specifically to celebrate with me—and not them.” Mason’s smile grew bigger by the second.
Tessler’s eyes hit Mason’s and held. His face looked so serious; his brown eyes were the only reveal to the emotions he was struggling to hide. “In case you haven’t already figured it out, I like you, Mason. I haven’t had this kind of thing with too many people. Okay … I haven’t ever had this with anyone, and that makes it extra—”
“Special? Is that what you were going to say?” Mason interrupted Tessler’s thought with his question.
“I was going to say unique, but special applies, too.”
Mason reached for Tessler’s hand on the table and squeezed it. “I’m with you on all of it,” he admitted. “I also feel this is something really special. It scares me as much as it excites me, and I don’t want to fuck it up.”
“Then, we won’t.”
“Easy for you to say since I’m the one with all the issues,” Mason said.
“And I’m the one with the checkered past,” Tessler countered. “Remember? I told you some shit about myself earlier, so I guess we’re even now.” Tessler quickly swiped his finger through the frosting on the edge of his cake and smeared it on the end of Mason’s nose before he saw it coming. “I guess we both have things about ourselves that are uncomfortable to talk about.”
Mason’s hand went up to wipe the frosting from his face, but Tessler stopped him by kissing the spot instead, then finished the job with his tongue. A moment later, Tessler’s tongue found Mason’s mouth, and he shared the sweetness of the frosting with him as their tongues and lips began to feast.
“Sweet mercy, what you fucking do to me,” Mason said on a moan.
“Care to join me downstairs in my bed?” Tessler asked with an expectant tone.
“It’s kind of late, isn’t it?” Mason asked.
“Maybe if you’re seventy or eighty,” Tessler said. “But you don’t feel that old to me.”
Mason leaned in to kiss Tessler again. Damn, he wanted what Tessler was offering—wanted it so fucking bad, but accepting that invitation led to a whole other list of his issues. He’d already showed Tessler how bad his attacks could be, and apparently, he still wanted to be with him. Would he scare Tessler off completely if he freaked out about getting naked in front of him?
“You’re thinking too hard about this,” Tessler whispered against his lips, “and there’s only one thing about you that I want to be hard right now, and I happen to be sitting on it.” Tessler rocked his hips against Mason’s erection for emphasis. “Do you want to see my room?”
“Lead the way.”
Chapter Seventeen
Seeing Mason stretched out on top of his big bed with nothing more than a dim light from the master bathroom spilling in to cast a warm glow over him did wonderful things to Tessler’s gut. It was strange and a little bit scary, but it also offered comfort because deep inside Tessler knew Mason was exactly where he was supposed to be.
Yes, the man had a few serious hurdles still to overcome in his life, but Tessler did, too. Still, he was confident he could help Mason through them and maybe rid himself of a few of his own demons in the process. Mason had a lot more going on for him than he knew, but Tessler could see it. It wasn’t what could be seen on the surface that got to Tessler, although the exterior packaging of Mason was pretty fucking spectacular. It was the glimpses of Mason at his core that had him coming unhinged. Mason was everything he’d been looking for in a man, that special someone to help get him through the days, and most definitely—the nights.
Tessler smiled warmly at Mason as he pulled his shirt over his head and tossed it onto a nearby chair. “Are you enjoying the show?” Tessler asked.
“I can’t take my eyes off of you,” Mason said.
Tessler undid his pants next, then pushed them off of his hips which left him wearing only a pair of tight, white briefs that more than defined his bulging package and his tanned skin. He sat on the edge of the bed and took his time undoing Mason’s shoes and removing his socks before he climbed up to lay beside him. Face to face they shared the same pillow, just a few scant inches separating them.
It was Tessler who reached to touch first. His fingers skimmed over Mason’s face, then down along his whiskered jawline and over his full lips. “I like seeing you in my bed.”
Mason took Tessler’s hand and pressed a kiss to the palm. “I’ve never been nervous in someone’s bed, but with you, I’m scared to death.”
“I don’t want you to be, Mase,” Tessler whispered. “It’s just you and me here, and I don’t care if this is all we do
.”
Mason ran the back of his fingers across Tessler’s chest when one of his knuckles rubbed against a pebbled nipple. Tessler sucked in a breath. “You like that?” Mason asked.
“My nipples are really sensitive,” Tessler admitted.
“Oh, yeah?”
The gleam in Mason’s eyes made Tessler shiver. A beat later, Mason had him rolled onto his back, as his tongue licked a path from his throat down to his collar bone, then worked his way lower across the flat plane of muscle on his chest and circled one brown disc.
“Oh fuck!” Tessler said as he pitched his hips skyward.
He heard Mason chuckle right before those lush lips closed around his hardened nub and sucked. Hard. The sharp slice of sensation that jolted through him was glorious and all-consuming; Tessler thought the top of his head might blow off from nothing more than Mason biting and sucking on his nipple.
“Holy shit! Mason, this feels so good,” Tessler sighed and arched his back to get closer to Mason’s exploring mouth.
Mason dragged his bristly chin across Tessler’s chest and worshiped the other tiny knot of nerve endings as thoroughly as the first. Slow laps using the flat of his tongue, followed by flicks from just the tip, and Tessler nearly launched himself off the bed again from the exquisite stimulation. Tessler bit his bottom lip to prevent himself from screaming out, and the thought occurred to him that he could probably come from just this. At the rate Mason was going, the blissful end would soon be near for Tessler, and he certainly wasn’t ready for that. Not yet.
Tessler watched Mason outlining his tattoo with his tongue. Methodical traces with the tip that left a wet trail of lines all over his chest and torso. He licked at every single ridge of muscle on Tessler’s abdomen and over each bump of rib. The attention was pushing Tessler closer and closer to orgasm. Another turn of Mason’s head had him drifting south. He wiggled under Mason’s ministrations and managed to haul him up just as those perfect lips and wet tongue had made it to the waistband of his briefs.
“If your mouth gets anywhere near my dick it’ll be all over for me,” Tessler panted.
“I want you in my mouth,” Mason said.
“You did me in with the nipple play,” Tessler answered. “I need a minute to let my body calm the fuck down.”
Mason took Tessler’s mouth again, and the tongue dance he gave had Tessler right back on the edge of orgasm. Jesus, his mouth is lethal! “Can I take off your shirt?” Tessler asked. He needed a distraction, or their fun and games were going to get messy really fast.
Mason turned onto his side and looked down at the skewed buttons on his shirt. Some of them were missing altogether, and Tessler could tell by the look on his face that he wasn’t sure how it had happened. His gaze lifted and caught Tessler’s in the dim light with the question clear in his eyes. “I did this up on the roof?” Mason asked.
“You were trying to loosen the collar to breathe,” Tessler explained.
“Damn it, I still can’t believe you had to see that,” Mason commented.
“I want to know all of you, Mason. Not just the parts that you feel are the prettiest or most convenient.”
Tessler’s fingers toyed with one of the buttons still intact on Mason’s shirt. His gaze held Mason’s, looking for a signal of some sort that would let him know he was all right. Tessler pushed the button through the hole and heard Mason’s breath hitch.
“You okay with this?” Tessler asked and Mason nodded.
He continued to work on another button until that one was through the hole, too. Soon enough, Mason’s shirt was completely open, and Tessler searched his eyes again for apprehension. He inched closer and pressed the flat of his palm onto Mason’s bare chest. The heat of his skin warmed Tessler to his bones.
“I want to touch you so bad,” Tessler whispered close to Mason’s mouth. “Touch you all over. Slowly. I’ll use just the tips of my fingers and make your skin bead and sweat, then explore every last inch until you scream out my name.”
They lay next to each other, both pair of eyes heavy-lidded with lust. Tessler’s fingers roamed freely beneath the fabric of Mason’s shirt. He started on his stomach, and there, he felt the flex of his muscles with each new ridge his fingers scaled. He went higher to Mason’s chest and loved the soft, swirls of hair, then his finger caught something metal. Tessler’s eyes bounced up to Mason’s as he flattened his finger and circled a nipple.
“You’re pierced?” Tessler asked with shock.
“Just that one,” Mason answered.
“I have to taste,” Tessler said, then eased the fabric of the shirt off Mason’s shoulder to reveal more of his impressive bare chest.
Mason did the rest of the work with the shirt and pulled his arm out of the sleeve. There was just a brief moment of hesitation, but then Mason continued to remove the whole shirt. He balled it up in his hands, then sat up and tossed it off the foot of the bed before he settled down beside Tessler again.
Mason spent a few seconds adjusting his position on his side, and Tessler sensed he might be feeling a little bit too exposed. As much as he wanted to see Mason’s beautiful body, he wanted him to be comfortable and relaxed around him, too. Because of that, he reached for a blanket he kept draped over the chair beside his bed and tossed it over Mason’s torso. It created sort of a tent over them and Tessler nuzzled in closer.
“Thanks, but you have me way too hot for a blanket,” Mason said softly.
“Oh, I haven’t even begun to make you hot.”
Tessler grinned at Mason and then went back to work. He was determined to get Mason’s mind to the point of mush. He wanted him completely pliant and confident about himself and his body so he’d truly be able to enjoy the pleasure Tessler was giving to him. Tessler peppered kisses along Mason’s rough, whiskered jawline and inched down to his throat. He sucked the skin then his tongue followed the slow bob of his Adam’s apple and licked a path over his collar bone to the round mound of his shoulder muscle and nibbled down to the biceps. His tongue traced the inking of a Marine emblem there, and Mason wrapped his arm around Tessler’s back.
“You’re driving me crazy,” Mason said and moaned.
“That was my intention,” Tessler said. He briefly made eye contact with Mason, then let his eyes close as he continued with his tongue bath.
Tessler shifted to Mason’s broad chest and rubbed his cheek there first. He could hear the solid and fast thump of Mason’s heartbeat and the shaky intakes of his breath. Tessler moved another inch and found what he was looking for—the tiny gold hoop pierced through Mason’s nipple.
“Fuck, that is so sexy,” Tessler whispered over Mason’s light brown disc. He licked and sucked, then used his teeth to tug on the ring.
“Jesus, you’re killing me,” Mason huffed out.
“With pleasure, I hope,” Tessler answered.
“Feels so fucking good.”
Tessler eased Mason onto his back and angled himself on the bed and ran his hand along Mason’s side to his hip and thigh. With fingers fanned wide, Tessler eased his hand towards Mason’s center and curled it over the enormous bulge that tented his jeans while his teeth continued to play with Mason’s piercing. He squeezed Mason’s hard length and felt his cock flex beneath his hand.
“Oh god, Tess,” Mason said and groaned. His fingers sifted through Tessler’s hair.
Tessler turned his head and licked a trail down the inside of Mason’s arm towards his wrist. He felt the rippled skin beneath his tongue at the same time Mason harshly pulled away. He rolled quickly and met Mason’s worried gaze. They’d made such progress, going slowly, and with Mason opening himself to him. There was no way Tessler wanted Mason to pull away from him now.
Tessler gripped his hand and laced their fingers. “Talk to me,” he whispered to Mason. “What’s going on in your head?”
Mason lay back onto the pillow and closed his eyes. “That spot you just touched on my arm,” Mason said.
“Is that one of the are
as that was burned?”
Mason nodded.
“Can I see?” Tessler asked as he gently started to turn Mason’s arm over in his palm. He hated the look of panic he saw float through Mason’s eyes. “It’s okay, Mase. It’s just you and me here. Please, can you let me see you—all of you?”
Tessler was pretty sure the room’s soft lighting was dulling some of the harshness of what he was seeing. The ridged skin occupied almost the entire length of the underside of his forearm. Swirls of healed flesh pulled in odd directions and looked like it had been stretched and smeared into place with a putty knife. Only a second or two passed, but he could already feel Mason tug to free his arm from Tessler’s grip.
Instead of letting go, Tessler lifted Mason’s forearm and kissed the damaged skin. He let his lips linger there before he risked a look at Mason. His expression seem horrified that Tessler would be touching him like this, but Tessler knew the importance of proving he really didn’t have a problem with Mason’s scars. It was just a small part of who Mason was as a man, and it was the entire man he was falling for, not just a piece.
“Don’t ...” Mason said.
“Does it hurt when I touch you here?”
“Not, really. I don’t actually have a lot of feeling in the skin there. It’s just . . . ugly,” Mason said and tried again to take his arm back again.
“Mason, look at me,” Tessler instructed and waited for their eyes to meet. “This doesn’t bother me.”
“Just a warning and for full disclosure, the shit on my arm is nothing compared to my leg and hip,” Mason mumbled.
Tessler scooted closer to Mason and wrapped his arm around his back. “I don’t need a warning. It’s okay,” he said and kissed the side of Mason’s head. He shifted Mason back in his arms a bit and pressed another kiss to his mouth. “I’m seriously addicted to your mouth,” Tessler whispered. “I could kiss you for hours.”