by Todd, Ian
Helen looked across at the grinning, ex-card carrying, Tory-voting, Pakistani shoapkeeper.
“Fur fuck’s sake!” she exclaimed, taking a puff ae her fag, as the ash fae the end ae it landed in her lukewarm tea.
Chapter Seventy Three
Helen lay the back ae her heid oan tae the folded up dish towel she’d placed oan the rim ae the bath. As her body goat used tae the hot bathwater, she felt the muscles in her back and legs respond tae the soothing suds ae the bubble bath…a Christmas present fae wan ae the grandweans. She could feel the adrenalin that hid been pumping through her body aw day starting tae slow doon as a warm sweat broke oot oan her brow. She lifted baith feet oot ae the water and looked doon at them. She wondered if she’d be crippled fur life, seeing the state they wur in wae aw the tramping aboot the streets in high heels she’d been daeing these past weeks. She curled her big toe, wae help fae its neighbour, roond the tap and turned oan the hot water, instantly feeling the boiling water trickle oot tae warm up the cooling water in her bath. She closed her eyes. The night hid come and gone in a bit ae a blur. It hidnae jist been the numbers that turned up that hid gied her confidence. If anything, the shock ae seeing so many people hid terrified her. She remembered that she couldnae stoap her left leg fae shaking, even when she shifted her weight oan tae the right wan, while waiting tae go oan tae deliver her opening spiel. Despite a reassuring squeeze oan her erm fae Susan, who’d been staunin beside her, practically haudin her up, while the pair ae them wur watching whit wis gaun oan oot oan centre stage, Helen hidnae been sure at the time if anything wid come oot when it wis her turn tae open her mooth tae speak. It hid been difficult tae guess how many people wur in the hall. Issie hid telt her later that she reckoned there hid been at least four or five hunner. The highlight ae the night fur Helen hid been when the whole hall erupted wae laughter and jeers jist before seven o’clock when JP Donnelly and aw his supporters arrived tae find the hall full ae people, awready seated. Even if she didnae win the election, the pleasure she’d always carry wae her ae seeing the shock oan that ugly auld mug ae his, when it dawned oan him that he’d been oot-foxed at his ain game by a bunch ae wummin, wid be worth aw the pain in her feet o’er the past four weeks. It hid been Squinty Alex, Nan’s man, that hid alerted her. Wan ae the other gravediggers up at the cemetery hid telt Alex that he needed tae get away sharp when they finished as he wanted tae get hame pronto tae hiv his tea and a bath before heiding across tae The Journeyman’s Club fur quarter tae seven. He’d telt Alex that JP hid arranged fur aw his supporters tae meet there as they wur aw gonnae march alang tae the Springburn Halls, mob-haunded, and position themsels in the hall tae intimidate Helen’s supporters. Sure enough, when Helen hid checked oot the diary, Aunt Jeannie hid warned her tae turn up at any rally venues early because JP usually goat his boys in first tae hog the best seats and tae intimidate his oppositions’ supporters. When aw the wummin, including Pearl and Senga’s crowd ae young lassies, hid found oot whit he wis up tae, they’d scattered tae the four winds, daeing the roonds, encouraging everywan tae get doon tae the hall well before seven. The turnoot hid shocked and terrified everywan. She’d overheard Issie asking a few people if they wur sure they’d come tae the right meeting as this wis aboot the local by-election. Jist tae rub salt intae his wounds, the young lassies, who’d aw been done up tae the nines and acting as stewards, hid deliberately left a dozen seats vacant in the middle ae the hall fur some ae JP’s crowd, while the rest ae them hid hid tae staun up at the back, wondering whit hid hit them. Whit hid made it even hotter fur JP’s rent-a-mob wis that there wis work taking place in the hall during the day which meant that the balcony wis oot ae action and locked up fur public use. Helen smiled as she thought back tae when Susan and her hid been staunin looking fae the side, oot oan tae the stage. Sir Bob Barker, fae the Liberals, hid been dribbling oan aboot how strikes wur making it difficult fur the country and how businesses that could invest in Springburn didnae because ae the cost tae the taxpayer. Helen hid felt a wee twinge ae pity fur him. Fae where she’d been staunin, she could see everywan in the hall sitting gabbing tae each other, ignoring him. Harry Bertram, who hidnae disappointed anywan by turning up in a style that wis a cross between Liberace and a Christmas tree, hid picked the candidates’ names oot ae the hat tae decide whit order they wur tae start. Helen hidnae been happy because her name hid been the last wan left in the hat. She’d been hoping tae get oot and oan tae the stage tae get her spiel o’er and done wae, so she could go and sit wae the other candidates behind the white cloth-covered main table. Colonel Spicer Barr-Owen hid been second up. He’d looked and sounded like the right pompous auld prick that he wis. While Sir Bob hid goat a few curious glances when he first walked oan tae the stage, The Colonel hid goat welcomed by a crescendo ae boos, followed by laughter and cat-calls by maist ae the people in the place. Even though she’d been petrified, Helen hid found it difficult no tae laugh alang wae everywan else. It hidnae seemed tae bother him though. The Colonel hid arrived at the microphone and hid proceeded tae slowly and methodically unfold his speech while getting himsel ready by staunin wae his face pointing towards the ceiling wae his eyes shut, breathing in deeply before exhaling. It hid been like something oot ae an auld vaudeville show as he loudly cleared his throat before he began. The place hid cracked up when somewan shouted, ‘We’re doon here,’ while he wis meditating tae the heavens. As soon as he’d opened his gub, the place hid jist erupted. The heid ae Harry Bertram’s gavel hid ended up shooting across the stage and scudding aff ae the foreheid ae Peggy Roy, wan ae JP’s few wummin supporters, as he wis hammering it doon oan his wee block, trying tae get people tae quieten doon tae let the Colonel hear himsel speak. The poor bugger hid soon gied up, bit no before gieing the audience a severe glare as he aboot-turned and stomped aff tae the candidates’ table wae his tail between his legs. Helen thought she’d heard him mention that it wis the Tories who wur the wans tae build a better Britain, bit it hid been clear tae aw and sundry that it wisnae gaun tae be in Springburn anytime soon. Next up hid been the Nationalists. Their man hid started telling everywan in a conspiratorial tone that wis hauf a rasp and hauf a whisper tae get oan the bus before it left the station. Home Rule wis jist roond the corner. He’d urged everywan tae look at how good Southern Ireland wis and hid reminded everywan aboot how good a Catholic country it wis. Apart fae hauf the men in the hall being Celtic supporters, Helen hidnae been too concerned aboot anywan trying tae blag a Catholic vote or two. If only he’d spoken aboot addressing poverty insteid ae gieing everywan a lecture oan the 45 rebellion, he might’ve grabbed a few people’s attention. It hid been JP’s entry that Helen and maist ae the hall hid been anticipating. When his turn hid come, he’d soon showed everywan why he’d been a cooncillor fur so long. He hidnae even waited until the cheers ae his ain supporters and the boos fae Helen’s wans hid died doon. He’d launched straight intae why he wis the man fur them. He’d spoken aboot his years ae fighting fur the people in the Toonheid, how his struggle tae get mair polis oan the beat hid paid aff and how he’d never missed a surgery wae his constituents every Thursday night in the thirty odd years he’d been a cooncillor. The fly bugger hid claimed that he’d opposed warrant sales, bit hid been stifled because warrant sales hid been part ae the ruling administration’s policy. As chair ae three committees, he hidnae been able tae vote against or publicly challenge the policy as he wid’ve been stripped ae the chairmanships and that wid’ve impacted negatively oan his constituents. He’d then started rattling aff aw the good he’d done fur the small businessman, the corner shoap people who serviced the communities late intae the night and how he’d been involved in aw sorts ae community sports groups, tae get things gaun fur young people. Christ, fur a second he’d even hid Helen convinced that he wis the second coming, so he hid. He’d goat a smattering ae cheers and a hall-full ae boos simultaneously when he’d hid a jibe at Helen by stating that he’d never kept a diary because everything he did as a cooncillor wis oan pub
lic record. His parting shot before he’d sat doon hid been tae state that he wis proud ae his public service and that his record spoke fur itsel.
When Helen’s turn hid come, she’d practically ran oan tae the stage and then stood there, using up precious seconds by freezing oan the spot. Even though she’d spent maist ae the day gaun o’er everything in her heid, when it came tae it, the silent, expectant sea ae faces looking up at her, hid totally thrown her. She’d spotted Jimmy sitting wae Isabelle, Anne and Norma, aw egging her oan wae their eyes. She hidnae clocked the arrival ae the press earlier, bit there at the front, wae pads and pencils in haun, Bradley McLeod and Harold Sliver hid sat smirking, looking up at her. O’er tae her right, staunin beside wan ae the hall doors wur Issie, Betty, Sharon and Soiled Sally who’d been ushering people tae their seats and collecting the question slips when people arrived in the hall. She’d seen their expectant, frightened stares, even though they’d been staunin in the semi-darkness, underneath the shadow ae the curved balcony. When she’d turned back tae the crowd in front ae her, she’d noticed that The Stalker wis staunin up at the back ae the hall beside Father John. It wis then that she’d clocked the smirking grin oan Peggy Roy’s face, sitting in the middle ae the stalls, waiting eagerly, in anticipation ae Helen making an arse ae hersel in front ae everywan. The past four weeks hid suddenly whizzed through that brain ae hers like the intro tae Dr Who, wae the polis box tumbling through time. The verbal and physical abuse fae JP’s supporters oan the streets, staunin oan street corners being battered by the wind and sleet, trying tae haun o’er leaflets tae people who wurnae interested, the priests rallying their flocks tae oppose her, the weeping ae aw the lassies as they exchanged sore blister stories, Jeannie Smullen’s auld jotter, trying tae explain tae her distraught daughter, Isabelle, how her abortion hid become public knowledge, the conditions they’d been confronted wae when gaun roond the doors ae the Corporations tenants, aw her posters being ripped doon or covered o’er minutes efter they’d been put up, the constant stream ae poor souls who’d finally swallowed their pride and shame and hid come knocking oan her landing door because they’d naewhere else tae go…that hid been the trigger. She’d launched intae her spiel.
“Well, Ah don’t know aboot you lot, bit Ah’m sure glad somewan aboot here kept a diary,” Helen hid snorted, as the hall erupted.
She hidnae messed aboot either, wance she’d started. She’d stated that she wis staunin because she wis sick ae aw these politicians, aw these wee fly-men, who promised the earth, bit delivered nothing tae the communities who voted them in. She spoke ae the frustration that she and others in the community felt when they watched helplessly, as the maist vulnerable in the area wur slung oot oan tae the street, or their furniture wis sold tae unscrupulous men in rusty white vans, who then went oan tae sell people’s worldly possessions doon at The Barras or Paddy’s Market the very next day, fur a healthy profit. She wondered why, efter living in a hoose fur thirty or forty years, people in Springburn still hid tae use ootside toilets oan freezing landings in the winter. She spoke aboot people being treated like second class citizens by The Corporation and so-called state employees…their employees…who wur supposed tae be there tae serve those in need, insteid ae shunting them fae pillar tae post, like cattle, jist because they hid the audacity tae turn up and claim whit they wur entitled tae. She wanted tae know where aw the sports facilities wur that JP hid been prattling oan aboot, seeing that the party he flitted in and oot ae hid been in power, doon in George’s Square, fur the past thirty odd years, before he even turned up in Springburn tae con the people there…the same way as he hid in the Toonheid. She said she’d decided tae staun, no because she wanted tae be a politician, bit because she’d heard that JP wis staunin. She said she’d never furgive hersel if she sat back and didnae try tae stoap whit he’d done in the Toonheid fae happening up there in Springburn. She said that whit people saw ae her is whit they’d get if she wis elected. She said she widnae be sitting behind the closed doors ae smoke-filled rooms, making deals doon in George’s Square...no because she didnae smoke, bit because, as in men’s toilets, wummin wur barred. She said she wis staunin tae oppose JP and his cronies fae flattening Springburn and ploughing motorways and expressways through the heart ae it, the way they’d done in the Toonheid, while acting in the interests ae big conglomerates. She stated that she’d continue tae support the vulnerable and defend the wider community, bit wid respect the will ae the people, whichever way they voted. She’d then thanked everywan fur their patience while she spoke, and hid goat a thunderous cheer when she’d admitted that she’d never stood up in front ae so many people in her life before and that she wis absolutely terrified.