“I think I do a pretty good job of that.”
He glanced at her face. “You do, honey. I think you have great instincts. You’re good under pressure. Remember, I’ve seen that.”
How could she forget the look on the terrorist’s face when his bloody handprint was left on the glass door of her office or later when she thought her life would end in that bomb blast?
But there was one lingering question she had to ask. “So, Zak, how often do SEALs get divorced? Is it a chronic problem?”
“What do you think?” Zak had pulled into the parking garage. Shutting the Hummer off, he turned in his seat to face her again. He focused on her hands folded neatly in her lap and gently covered them with his. His warm fingers wrapping around hers was comforting. She could see he was trying to formulate words for something difficult to say. He perused her chest, up her neck, and then met her face to face. “I think the statistic is better than sixty percent. That’s all military, too. Maybe the SEALs are a little higher, but I’m not sure.”
She broke eye contact and stared at the walls of the garage, swallowing hard.
“Thing is, Amy, it’s hard on the families when the guys go overseas. That stress takes several forms. I guess Connie went on a spending bender, and then they had money problems. I just think she was weak and decided she couldn’t handle it. We all wish she could have just been honest about that—she wasn’t made for this life. No harm in that. But the way she’s going about it is all wrong.”
“Terrible for the kids.”
“Tears Lucas up. It really does.”
“I won’t lie to you, Zak. I really don’t know how I’ll feel when you go overseas.”
“I know that. That’s being honest.”
“But I want to support you. I know this was what you were made to do.”
“That’s absolutely for certain. But I want to make one thing perfectly clear. My dedication to this job will always come first as long as I am a SEAL. If that changes, then I get out. You need to know that.”
It was one of the things that scared her the most. No matter how much he loved her, being a SEAL would always come first.
“And?” Amy knew there was something more he was leaving out.
“Let’s go inside.” He took her hand. She slid off the seat into his arms, and they walked hand in hand up to the elevator and to his apartment beyond.
He directed her to sit on the couch while he brought in some mineral water for both of them. Instead of taking his place beside her, he knelt in front of her. “Amy Dobson, you know me. You don’t know the community yet, but I do, and I think there is a place here for you. I’ve got the green light from your dad.”
Amy’s expression must have registered shock because Zak hurriedly explained how he’d called Chief Allister Dobson and her father had given him his approval.
“Kind of old fashioned, but I wanted to do it that way. I knew what your father thought was important to you, Amy.”
The tender expression on Zak’s face left her speechless. He’d planned this ahead of time. This was more than a just meet and greet with the other members of his SEAL Team; this was a planned course of action. Very intentional. She saw for the first time how he’d bared his soul to her. He’d set all this up.
“Marry me, Amy. You already said yes, but I wanted you to know that your dad is in agreement.” He took her hands in his. “I want to make it formal. I don’t want to wait for some day.”
She didn’t have to think about it. She went to bed every night and woke up every morning envisioning being his wife, sharing a life with this man. “Of course, just like I said before, I’ll marry you, Zak. And in time, I’ll learn how to support you the way I need to. I think I’m good with it all.”
Her smile would usually bring a kiss, but he was still hesitating.
“What is it?” Now she was getting worried.
“I want us to get married before I deploy.”
“Like when?”
“Soon. How about next weekend?”
Chapter 5
Into the night, they planned a small civil ceremony, followed by reservations at the Hotel Del Coronado. He knew she felt rushed, and he wasn’t totally comfortable with it, either. It wasn’t the ceremony that bothered him, but the two-day honeymoon. And that was squeezing a day out of their training just three days before they got on the plane. Kyle asked him if he’d be more settled with the quickie wedding and honeymoon.
“Yessir,” was the only answer Zak could think to give him back. He was grateful for the extra day and night.
After it was all arranged and Amy flew home to gather her things and get the move scheduled, Armando was sporting a grin Zak wanted to wipe off his face. It was the best shit-eating grin he’d ever seen.
“What’s the rush, Jell-O?” the handsome Puerto Rican SEAL asked. The two of them had developed a bond through their love of guns and special gadgets. Zak was easing into feeling a full-fledged member of his new team, and Armando was the ticket to get there.
“No rush. I just want it settled.”
“Ah. So you’re worried she’ll change her mind after you go? You tying down all the loose ends, my friend?”
He’d asked himself the same question over and over again. Had he decided to do this because he didn’t want to lose her or because he wanted his mind to be at ease when he was gone?
“Armani, I’m just ready, is all. I think she is, too.” He adjusted his duty bag higher on his shoulder. They’d been participating in long-range target practice. “I want my bite out of the apple. Things happen. I know that.”
“Yeah, but don’t go thinking about it none. Remember, things happen, but not to you. You and I,” Armani said as he pointed to Zak first and then to his own chest, “we come home. Just like all the rest of Kyle’s squad.”
Amy had just four days to pack up and drive to San Diego. Her replacement at the Omni helped her in the evenings, so they got it done in three. The last night, Cheryl stayed over. The apartment was going to be sold after new paint and carpeting was installed. Sales were slower, even though the summertime tourist season was well upon them. The number of second home buyers willing to pay several million dollars for a one-bedroom place, even in San Francisco, had dwindled, along with fears about the economy in the Bay Area. It didn’t help that the terrorist bombing and shootout at Ferry Plaza had dominated the news for nearly a month. It was also something they had to disclose to a prospective buyer, due to California law.
She would miss the view of the Bay Bridge lit up at night, the ever-changing colors of blue water on the bay. Amy felt like she’d barely gotten to know her new digs. And now she was leaving.
But there was blue water calling her down in Coronado, too, and a life with a man who would probably never be able to afford such a place, but who was all she needed.
In San Diego, the planning had been so quick, and with their limited funds, the choices were slim. The wedding would take place in Cooper’s in-laws’ backyard, where several of the other SEALs had gotten married, as well. Libby’s parents wanted to pay for the flowers and wine. With the kegs barely ordered in time and thanks to the other SEAL wives, everyone was bringing something for the wedding feast afterwards. It was going to resemble a common backyard summertime barbeque. She bought a dress that didn’t need alteration from a local bridal outlet. Though it was last year’s fashion, Amy doubted anyone would be able to tell.
As she loaded up the last of her things, she was suddenly anxious to be on her way and couldn’t wait to start her new life. Far from feeling rushed, she urgently wanted to get back down to Zak.
Cheryl gave her a hug. “I hope everything works out for you, Amy. Although all this was fast, you’ve known Zak for years.”
“We kind of grew up together.”
“I’m grateful for the job, too. I’ll keep in touch, and not to worry, if any of your past customers come back, I’ll make it right with you.”
“Thanks, but that’s not likely to happ
en. Not like I was here very long.”
“Well, you’ll have a lot of other things on your mind. I can’t wait to come visit you later in the year. Maybe keep you company when Zak’s overseas?”
“That sounds nice.”
“When is your dad coming?”
“He’s flying down tomorrow with Marlene and Margrit. Love to be a fly on the wall for that conversation.”
“Oh?”
“Margrit works for my dad at the station. She isn’t always very discrete, so I’m sure I’ll get an earful.”
“Surprised he didn’t want to drive you down there himself.”
“Oh, he tried. I just wanted this time to be by myself, take this big step on my own.” She remembered his answer when she verified he’d agreed to Zak’s proposal.
‘Amy, he’s a different man now. He’s ready to protect you. I see that in him. I’m glad you’re going down there to be with him. Get away from all this—danger.’
She never stopped thinking about this important step in her life during her drive south. She thought about it as she watched him move her things inside his apartment. The bachelor pad became a shared space. There was evidence of her there: her favorite teapot, her coffee maker, her favorite sheets, and soap for the shower. She stood her toothbrush next to his and discovered they had the same brand. She hung her dresses in the space he’d left for her in the closet. Her wedding gown was already hanging in the corner of the room on a special stand.
As she added her things to his, she began to relax. She touched his razor and the special shave cream he used – all things she’d smelled and touched before, but that all seemed like a long time ago. Her world was blending with his. He found her smoothing over his shirts in his underwear drawer, inhaling his aftershave, rubbing the cotton fabric against her cheek.
His stealthy body moved behind her to spoon into her backside.
“You okay, Amy?”
She smiled and realized she’d been crying as tears spilled over her lower lids. “Never better. I don’t know why these things move me so much. Just simple things, but they are the things you use every day. The things you hold in your fingers, things you’ve chosen. Like me. Like you chose me.”
Perhaps I’m being silly. Overly emotional. Maybe that’s not what he wants to see.
He lifted and parted her hair at the back of her neck, deliberately giving her a moist, passionate, and lingering kiss that made her spine tingle.
“I’ve been waiting for you to come into my life, Amy.”
She turned. His eyes were watery, as well. Her thumbs caressed his cheekbones as she studied the unwavering gaze and the power of his breath on her face. “You chose me, Zak. You reached out and grabbed me. I will belong to you now.”
“We chose each other a long time ago, Amy. But tomorrow it will be official.”
She stood in the safety of his embrace, reveling in the warmth that was their shared love. For this space and time, life was perfect in every way possible.
It was a Cinderella moment for Amy. Bright sunlight woke her. The cream-color sheets barely covered her naked body. Lying on her back, one arm draped over her forehead, she heard birds outside.
Am I dreaming? Have I died and gone to Heaven?
A massive shadow crossed her flesh, and then a divot appeared in the mattress as Zak sat next to her. His now-familiar after-shave enveloped her. She inhaled and allowed it to arouse her, heard the tinkling of the water left dripping in the tiled shower. A callused palm slipped under her sheets and moved slowly up her torso as she arched back, stretched but did not open her eyes. His fingers squeezed her left breast and then traveled to outline the smile that had separated her lips. She heard him lick his and swallow before she felt his flesh against her own.
The command was deep, needy, and yet protective. The fire in her belly flamed as her arms accepted the press of his torso against her. The anticipation of their lovemaking was driving her wild. Her arms were as needy as his, holding her shaking body against him, her thighs separating and rubbing against the outsides of his. He kissed her closed lids, asking her to see him.
“Zak.” She wanted to say more, but was without words.
“Your day, Amy,” he whispered between kisses. Into the hollow of her neck and then up to her ear, he sent his trembling voice. “Your day to be worshiped.”
Their eyes found each other, locked, and connected. Zak’s body slid over and between her legs, all the while not taking his gaze from hers. Their hands mated, outstretched and to the side. With commanding gentleness, he pulled them above her head, fastening them in place with one hand at her wrists. His other hand lovingly lifted her left butt cheek, angling her pelvis up to meet his hips. She raised her knees to accept him. Her need intensified as he entered her slowly at first and then deep, pulling out to plunge in again.
Amy’s head arched back, and Zak placed a wreath of wet kisses under her chin, from one ear to the other. His relentless movements in and out, strong and steady, began a powerful crescendo, turning her insides to fire. He both coaxed and demanded she submit to his powerful body, yet brought her to such heights her self-control disappeared. She met his strength with her own powerful need to match his. Their lovemaking became a delicious shared mixture of dominance and submission, roles reversed and lovingly expressed back again.
In the bright sunlight, with the friction of flesh against flesh, he fed her with his kisses, not releasing her body until every quiver and shake was squeezed from her body. As birds twittered in a distracted afternoon sky, her mind traveling somewhere off to a distant future, she knew she would always belong to him. She knew the more he gave, the more she would need him.
The chairs were arranged with a nosegay at the end of the four rows on both sides. She watched as more chairs were added to the little ceremony. Zak was standing next to the chaplain, who had married several of the SEALs. Her husband-to-be’s face beamed when he saw her.
Libby had given her the veil she wore when she married Coop. Amy wore the wedding pearls her mother had left her. Carter gave her an admiring perusal and a kiss on her cheek.
“Lovely, Amy. You are the perfect bride.”
Margrit gave her a kiss, handed her the colorful bouquet of lilies and red and white roses, then turned to take her walk down the aisle on Carter’s arm. A lute player began while Carter and Margrit took their places alongside the chaplain and Zak.
As the lute player began the stanza that was her cue, her father put his arm around her waist. “My little girl getting married,” he said to the top of her head with a crack to his wavery voice. “I’ve thought about this day, and you are even more beautiful than I imagined. More beautiful than your mother the day I married her.” He kissed her through the veil. She cast her eyes downward so he didn’t see she noticed his tears.
She knew it was a special day, made even more special by the fact that there might be many more or only a precious few of these days to celebrate. The world was a dangerous place and the SEALs did dangerous things. Time would tell. So she took it all in, enjoying what she could, knowing no one could predict the future.
The path she took down the brick patio to the man who waited there was a smooth one today. She would draw strength from it now as she knew some day she’d need that reserve. There would be worry while he was deployed. Looking into the faces and bowed heads of the women in the audience, she vowed to rely on their collective unwavering grit and to give back what she could to this little community of warriors and the people who loved them. She wasn’t just marrying this man; she was marrying everything he stood for, his way of life, and the ethos he carried. That honor and ethos had chosen him, not the other way around. She prayed it would choose her in time, as well.
As she got close to Zak, she said a little mental prayer to herself, while feeling the heat from his body the closer she got to him.
She wished she could make these next two days something they’d never forget, never regret, and something worthy of reliving forever.
The words were spoken. Her father kissed her cheek again, handing Zak her left hand, and then took his seat in the front row next to Marlene.
“Forever, Amy. No matter what,” he whispered. The chaplain’s words were nearly drowned out. “This is forever. I promise I will always come back to you.”
A shiver traveled down her backside when he said those words. She composed herself, licked her lips, and whispered back, “And I’ll always be waiting for you. Your home is in my heart.”
He squeezed her hand, brought it to his mouth, and kissed it.
Chapter 6
Zak was still buzzing with the visions of the two days of lovemaking they’d had, even though he was rocking inside a loud transport plane. He was glad the beast was so loud. He didn’t want to talk to anyone, since it gave him a few hours to get lost in the memory of her sweetness.
Every time he closed his eyes, he saw her body in front of him, how she felt against him, as she rode him, as she begged him to urgently take her, begged him to be gentle. If it hadn’t been for the mission, he’d have stayed in bed with her for much longer.
They’d eked every minute they could out of their last night together, so he also realized some of this was the fog of lack of sleep. The other men seemed to sense it and left him alone. Carter kept up with the Cheshire cat grins, though Zak pretended he’d not seen them.
Their plane landed, sounding like it had burst a tire on impact. He left his earphones on the longest of anyone, struggling to say goodbye to the images and dream state he’d been immersed in. Hearing the high-pitched whine of the engines and feeling the furnace-like blast from the dry Moroccan air brought his daydreams abruptly to an end. The team began moving immediately, not leaving any time to wallow in a second good-bye, even if it was a virtual one.
“We’re to meet the Secretary at the hangar,” Kyle barked over the sounds of equipment and the engines. As soon as it was unloaded, the big transport would be taking off for another location. Part of the plan was to not draw too much attention to each other.
SEALed At The Altar_Bone Frog Brotherhood Novel Page 26